# Virginity..



## Toni Plutonij (Jan 3, 2009)

tinymonkeyt's thread about girls vs. boys masturbation made me think, so I felt like posting this..Just a note to everyone, I really want this thread to be serious, and no fooling around, or I'll delete it!

I have few questions for all of you who are willing to talk!
How many of you have lost virginity (had their first sex)?
At what age did you do it?
Was that experience good/bad (good sex, bad sex?)
How do you feel about it, are you sorry for not waiting, for someone other/better/more special?
Do your parents (if you're young) know about it, and do they approve it?
How much virginity actually IS IMPORTANT to you? Do you want to wait for marriage, do you enjoy one night stands, do you want to do it out of a love with your partner?!

To tell you mine experience, I did it at the age of 16 for the first time! Mine first time was kinda rushed and bad, we were both drunk, I didn't enjoyed it all that much, but was kinda proud to loose virginity. I never felt strongly about it, and I kinda just wanted to get it over with, but boy was I wrong..
My second time was about month or so after, and it was the most intense thing I ever did, it was kinda spontanius and it was REALLY good..
I'm still with the very same girl, and I'm extremely happy that mine first time was with someone I love, and not with some unknown girl from some concert or something like that!

Please, keep this serious, and without any "graphical" stuff..

EDIT: Costello, if you feel like removing this, please, do it, I don't mind


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## darkangel5000 (Jan 3, 2009)

I hadn't had sex yet and want to save it to have a wonderful first night with the one I really love.

Some of my friends rushed it and they say it was the worst decision they've ever made. So I want to wait.


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## Toni Plutonij (Jan 3, 2009)

darkangel5000 said:
			
		

> I hadn't had sex yet and want to save it to have a wonderful first night with the one I really love.
> 
> *Some of my friends rushed it and they say it was the worst decision they've ever made. So I want to wait.*


Yeah, I'd advise you the same thing......and that's coming from a punk guy that shouldn't care about those things much 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	



Believe me, it's worth waiting in the end..

But some people are different personalities, and they enjoy one night stands, and fooling around with that!


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## tinymonkeyt (Jan 3, 2009)

havent lost it
and wont lose it until marriage
yes. im THAT conservative

keep in mind if you lose your virginity at a young age with a random someone
you're fucking someone's future spouse.


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## Rock Raiyu (Jan 3, 2009)

I haven't lost my virginity. And I don't plan to for a while.


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## Evilwii (Jan 3, 2009)

I lost it summer last year,I'm 13 no parents don't know and I don't want them to know.I enjoy one nights and being anti marriage and being a real anarchist im against the goverment and if my name gets out my plans for the next 4 years till i get a lisence im gonna blow shit up with c4.I kinnda knocked her up but i dont live near her she was nextdoor to my friend who i went to vist we hit it off and well thats it


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## tinymonkeyt (Jan 3, 2009)

_*snip_
somehow i dont believe this.


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## Anakir (Jan 3, 2009)

I don't care too much about virginity. Virginity never comes to my mind until the female brings it up. I lost mine when I was 17. I was a virgin and she wasn't. The experience wasn't bad. Surprisingly, she was more horny than I was haha. We eventually broke up and I eventually found someone else. This time, this one's a virgin. She always said that she'll never have sex until she's married.. but I proved her wrong lol. A lot of girls say that they won't have sex until they're married, but it's actually not true based on my friends.

For a lot of relationships to be long term, sex is actually needed to keep it interesting after a long amount of time. Respect to those who are in long term relationship and never had sex yet. I just don't know how they can do it lol.

Anyways, virginity doesn't matter to me. As long as my partner never had too many sexual relationships. More than 5 sexual relationships is kind of a turn off for me. Other than that, I don't really mind 'cause in the end, all that matters is if you love that person. 

I wouldn't do one night stand. You wouldn't have any idea where that girl's been or done. I don't want to risk getting any sort of STD.


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## science (Jan 3, 2009)

_*snip_

I agree lol


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## Evilwii (Jan 3, 2009)

tinymonkeyt said:
			
		

> Evilwii said:
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well form what my friend said she was knocked up maybe he was lieing to scare the shit out of me(being chatolic and polish/irish id get my ass kicked by my uncles for knocking a chick up)I did sleep with her though.her name was Sara deaver.


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## Canonbeat234 (Jan 3, 2009)

tinymonkeyt said:
			
		

> havent lost it
> and wont lose it until marriage
> yes. im THAT conservative
> 
> ...



Well to be blunt, I'm the virgin of the vagina, not the ass. 

To be descriptive I had my first sex; well ANAL sex (the sex where you duke a girl inside the butt) at the age of 14 the same year that 9/11 happened. I remember it happen when oldest brother brought a two girls inside the apartment, he wanted me to screw with this girl that's the sister of the girl that my oldest brother was hanging with at that time. She did a few boys and I was just another sucker but I wasn't THAT dumb like all other males; no offense. So we chatted and I wasn't ready, she kept her persistence and she giving me a blowjob and I just wanted to get it out of the way so I did her in the ass. Not in the vagina. 

I take virginity very important, I'm waiting to have a date, it grows into a relationship, then marriage and finally sex. 
Until that time comes I'm still a virgin >.> since I didn't orgasm inside her ass.


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## dewp (Jan 3, 2009)

I broke my virginity when i was 16 years old with my gf at the time - it wasn't that great as it was her first time aswell and she was in a load of pain- didn't last long and i didn't climax - was much better thereafter though


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## Vulpes Abnocto (Jan 3, 2009)

_How many of you have lost virginity (had their first sex)?_

*I have.*

At what age did you do it?

*I was 16. That was in 1996.*

_Was that experience good/bad (good sex, bad sex?)_

*Oh it was a very nice experience. I have no regrets about the night's events. 
You've got to admit, it's a rather memorable time when you make love in a near freezing November drizzle, atop a wet rock. 

I'd chased her for a year. *

_How do you feel about it, are you sorry for not waiting, for someone other/better/more special?_

*If I had any changes I'd make to the situation; I'd like it to have been with someone who I was better compatible with. We were together for three years, on and off. I'd prefer the memory to be with someone I could actually have loved long-term. *

_Do your parents (if you're young) know about it, and do they approve it?_

*I'm from a divorced family. They both learned about it that same year because of a stupid mistake I made. 
(Never EVER keep incriminating photos in your jacket pocket on laundry day. o.o ) 
neither of them particularly approved...as a matter of fact my mother threatened to call the police on me. 
*chuckle**

_How much virginity actually IS IMPORTANT to you? Do you want to wait for marriage, do you enjoy one night stands, do you want to do it out of a love with your partner?!_

*It's really not important to me. In my personal opinion, I don't feel that one should save their virginity for marriage, simply because so much of married life (from what I've observed and lived through) is based on sex. 
I don't believe sex is a privilege to be allowed, so much as a skill to be mastered. 
BUT: My viewpoint works for me, 
of course it isn't Right for Everybody, 
so I'm not saying to be like me...... 
and if anything I'll usually tell someone NOT to be like me. 
*


EDIT: details


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## VmprHntrD (Jan 3, 2009)

I'm bored why not...

At what age did you do it? -> Early in college age is irrelevant (ie: can't remember)

Was that experience good/bad (good sex, bad sex?) -> Mind blowingly great with this hot blonde I had been dating who just ended up being a bit of a nymphomaniac.  Not like I'd mind when you're with a girl with 38DDD boobs, fantastic curves, great kisser, toucher, and good with her mouth too. 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




  Long story short, as much fun as there was I lost food on a fairly good % junkfood diet at the time. 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




How do you feel about it, are you sorry for not waiting, for someone other/better/more special? -> Feel great, no regrets or sorriness involved, and it was special.  See above.

Do your parents (if you're young) know about it, and do they approve it? -> Considering the age would that really matter or be their business?

How much virginity actually IS IMPORTANT to you? Do you want to wait for marriage, do you enjoy one night stands, do you want to do it out of a love with your partner?! -> Honestly it's not.  I think the entire concept of a virgin at least in western society is bullshit in this modern world.  I see it as a mix of parents who grew up in the 1950s and a long lived practice of the Christian churches to control people and their will and impose their crap on the public on the whole making it taboo.


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## skyman747 (Jan 3, 2009)

I am a Freshman right now. I plan on getting some sort of sexual activity by the time I graduate high school (ex. Blowjob, Handjob, Maybe Anal), but I probably won't go for the real thing before college, seeing as I will be moving away from where I go to high school for college (AZ to CA), and I don't want to go all the way with a girl I might not see for the rest of my life  
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




I will most likely engage in sexual activity with more bodily gifted girls more easily, but won't go for the real thing until I meet a girl I actually think I could live with.


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## TrolleyDave (Jan 3, 2009)

At what age did you do it?
I'd just turned 14, it was with a girl I knew for a while but she wasn't my girlfriend and it was at a party.

Was that experience good/bad (good sex, bad sex?)
It was alright.

How do you feel about it, are you sorry for not waiting, for someone other/better/more special?
Not really, although to be honest I think it changed it from being something emotional to being a pure pleasure seeking experience.

Do your parents (if you're young) know about it, and do they approve it?
My parents found out about it shortly after and weren't too happy about it.  I got a massive lecture on how I was a bad kid.

How much virginity actually IS IMPORTANT to you?
It wasn't very important to me, although after experiencing years of it just being an act of pleasure I'd recommend to most that you wait until it's an actual emotional bond rather than just scratching an itch.  I get the feeling that even though I've had alot of it I've never really experienced the way some do.


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## luisrodl (Jan 3, 2009)

Nice thread this one, brings back many nice memories. 

The age I did it the whole deal was 18 years old. Before that I dabbled in all of the other sexual stuff that did not involved well penetration.

The experience was amazingly good. The girl I did it with was really experienced and well 9 years older than me so she taught me all the tips and tricks I needed to know. The first night of having sex I think is one of the top 3 sexual encounters I've had in my life. 

I don't feel any type of regrets about not waiting or anything like that. 

Well I think my parents always thought that I was sexually active since I was in high school because my dad always gave me condoms as an added gift in each birthday since I was 15 and my mother well figured it out because I was stupid enough to leave a pack of condoms in my desk one drunken night. But well my parents are very liberal and stuff but that does not matter anymore because well I'm already 21.

Virginity for me is one of the most stupid and outdated concepts that exist in modern society. I could not care less if I was with some girl who is a virgin/who is not a virgin/that has had a lot experience in the past. What matters is the personality and interactions you have with that person, not how many guys she has slept with or if she is a virgin or not. 

As a side note that definition of slept with meaning sex for me is totally wrong. I have slept with many friends who are girls before but not had sex, just economic rooms acomodations. Why do we have to use that euphemism of "slept with" instead of just saying that had sex, sexual relations or even make love?


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## Prophet (Jan 3, 2009)

I'm 21 and a virgin. I can't say I've put much effort into losing it, if anything I've probably avoided the situation. I have a complex when it comes to people, women especially. To me most women seem to be husk, empty shells, tits and a skirt with nothing redeemable in their personality and in turn I have no attraction to them. But I do on a rare occasion meet a girl and she's perfect, an angel, the type of person you wish you could shelter from the cruel nature of the world... and then it dawns on me, "I'm part of that cruel world." I look at my past and I feel like a beast. And as a beast the best thing I can do for this pure, un-jaded girl is to simply forget her name and leave her for a worthier guy. I'm a hopeless romantic at heart, but life has left me tainted and I guess I just want to make sure I'm never responsible for anyone else's suffering.


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## Toni Plutonij (Jan 3, 2009)

Prophet said:
			
		

> I'm 21 and a virgin. I can't say I've put much effort into losing it, if anything I've probably avoided the situation. I have a complex when it comes to people, women especially. To me most women seem to be husk, empty shells, tits and a skirt with nothing redeemable in their personality and in turn I have no attraction to them. But I do on a rare occasion meet a girl and she's perfect, an angel, the type of person you wish you could shelter from the cruel nature of the world... and then it dawns on me, "I'm part of that cruel world." I look at my past and I feel like a beast. And as a beast the best thing I can do for this pure, un-jaded girl is to simply forget her name and leave her for a worthier guy. I'm a hopeless romantic at heart, but life has left me tainted and I guess I just want to make sure I'm never responsible for anyone else's suffering.




Prophet, I just admire you and you're ways of thinking! That stuff is really special!
Very interesting way of thinking, especially last sentence..

I must say I'm kinda surprised how many of you actually got this thread seriously and write honest posts, I though I'll have to close it very soon, but you guys are great!  
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	



Some of your experiences are really very interesting!


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## Maktub (Jan 3, 2009)

Canonbeat234 said:
			
		

> tinymonkeyt said:
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Man, at least I consider anal sex further into... "perversion" than vaginal sex. It's like on that Family Guy episode when they decide to have Auricular (through the ears) sex to remain virgin... 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




Me, I lost virginity at an age too soon for many of you to believe. Let's just say I hadn't even lost my first set of teeth by the time I lost my virginity (in fact, I believe I didn't quite have a complete set of them). And I don't give a damn. Love matters a lot more than such a symbolic thing as virginity.

Also, @ prophet: women are 99% like men. And, yeah, we're all part of that cruel world. There's the love, too. It's not black or white or not even gray, it's just life.


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## Linkiboy (Jan 3, 2009)

Yeah I'm a virgin, not ashamed to admit it... and I hope to keep it that way until marriage or a strong love... whichever comes first (hopefully the two will become synonymous)


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## Banger (Jan 3, 2009)

How many of you have lost virginity (had their first sex)?
*I am only 1 person 
	

	
	
		
		

		
			



*

At what age did you do it?
*Sadly at the age of 13... If I could go back in time I would have waited longer...*

Was that experience good/bad (good sex, bad sex?)
*Was good I guess... Was a long ass time ago so yea some things are a bit foggy..., but still wish I would have waited...*

How do you feel about it, are you sorry for not waiting, for someone other/better/more special?

*Am I sorry for not waiting? Not like I hurt someones feeling by doing something so stupid... But I do wish I would have waited till I was older. Not saying I did not care for the person but still would have preferred to have waited till I was a bit older and more mature.*

Do your parents (if you're young) know about it, and do they approve it?
*I doubt it, my dad I have not seen in forever and I do not tell my mom many aspects of my life. So if they approved or not who knows...*

How much virginity actually IS IMPORTANT to you? Do you want to wait for marriage, do you enjoy one night stands, do you want to do it out of a love with your partner?!

*Virginity is overrated as is losing your virginity... You should not be pressured into keeping your virginity nor should you be pressured into losing it. I think everyone should wait till they are old enough to make the right decision about losing their virginity to someone and hopefully to someone they care a great deal about, if they are not at that age well it in the end is still up to that person.*

*Kind of late to wait till marriage eh, but I am not one who would have waited till marriage but again I will state how I wish I would have waited till I was a bit more mature...*

*I do not agree with people who have one night stands but that is their prerogative to do so however I will not stop them from doing something so immature (in my eyes at least) and stupid... Hopefully they do not end up scaring someone emotionally by doing so.*


Mind rephrasing "do you want to do it out of a love with your partner?!" this part please?

If you mean is it best to do it with someone you love and care for then...

*Yea I do believe a sexual act should be between someone you care for and love. If you wish to do it with someone you do not care for well I guess thats up to you.*


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## juggernaut911 (Jan 3, 2009)

Some chicks from 8th grade were already preggerz! 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




I'm a virgin, don't mind. Sure, I'd lose it, with some one I love


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## Edgedancer (Jan 3, 2009)

Linkiboy said:
			
		

> Yeah I'm a virgin, not ashamed to admit it... and I hope to keep it that way until marriage or a strong love... whichever comes first (hopefully the two will become synonymous)


I am glad your a virgin Linkiboy. You are only 6 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




I am still a virgin at the age of 17. I have never had any relationships with the opposite sex so far but even if I has a girlfriend, I would not go for the sex straight away. I think it would only complicate things because although I know sex is a part of life, I want a partner that craves my personality and not my dick.

Kind of off topic but do many of you, particularly the people in school, objectify girls, only looking out for the "hottest chicks" or do you actually look for personality.


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## Toni Plutonij (Jan 3, 2009)

Edgedancer said:
			
		

> Kind of off topic but do many of you, particularly the people in school, objectify girls, only looking out for the "hottest chicks" or do you actually look for personality.


I was never that type of person, I don't even like to watch girls around and comment their body and stuff like that, many of my school friends did it, and at that point I'd just leave, because I felt like it's making me stupid (talks like that)..
I don't get actually what is "hottest chick", to make me feel like I want anything more with a girl, then actually only be her friend, I'd had to really get to know her! Just because someone has great body, or big breasts, it won't make me want to be with her, and other than that, I'm a type of person that wouldn't do sex without emotion, aka one-night-stand (or few-nights-fuck)..
But that's just me..

I look for personality, how she look is only a bonus!


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## granville (Jan 3, 2009)

I'm 20 and a virgin. It's not important for me to keep it, it's just out of my hands as to whether I can have sex. I'm also very shy around girls, so I don't even know if I'll ever be able to develop a relationship with a girl. It's been years since I've been actively engaged in ANY sort of social activity. I don't know how I'll be able to handle college (doubt I'll ever be able to afford it anyways).

That being said, I'm a little sad that I'm unable to develop a relationship with anyone. I'd certainly like to have a girlfriend, but I just can't. I don't have a social life, but it's not due to my lack of confidence, but the fact that I'm financially burdened (got no car, and no other way to travel anywhere).


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## Lockon Stratos (Jan 3, 2009)

Well my friend has a saying about virginity:

"If you're under 18 losing your virginity is bad! If you're over 18 losing your virginity is good!"


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## dewp (Jan 3, 2009)

granville said:
			
		

> I'm 20 and a virgin. It's not important for me to keep it, it's just out of my hands as to whether I can have sex. I'm also very shy around girls, so I don't even know if I'll ever be able to develop a relationship with a girl. It's been years since I've been actively engaged in ANY sort of social activity. I don't know how I'll be able to handle college (doubt I'll ever be able to afford it anyways).
> 
> That being said, I'm a little sad that I'm unable to develop a relationship with anyone. I'd certainly like to have a girlfriend, but I just can't. I don't have a social life, but it's not due to my lack of confidence, but the fact that I'm financially burdened (got no car, and no other way to travel anywhere).









 alcohol is an easy fix for confidence issues


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## aphirst (Jan 3, 2009)

*How many of you have lost virginity (had their first sex)?*
I have not.

*How much virginity actually IS IMPORTANT to you? Do you want to wait for marriage, do you enjoy one night stands, do you want to do it out of a love with your partner?!*
In my opinion it isn't the virginity itself that's important, it's your attitude. It vexes me that so many people (in the real world) view sex as cheap pleasure, with no emotional attachment (and I personally draw strong correlations with that and alcohol, one of the reasons I've never consumed an alcoholic beverage of any strength). Speaking as yet another 17 year old with "1337 skill" (read: absolute nerd), but absolutely *zero* relationship experience of *any* kind, I can say that I thoroughly intend for my first relationship to be absolutely *meaningful*, and by all means permanent. Which is probably why I've only ever asked (albeit *very* awkwardly) *three* girls to "go out with me", or whatever. They just don't appeal to me emotionally. I'm hardly bothered about what they look like, it's the personality/quirks that appeal to me most. (My own real-world quirks can come off as anoying to most types of people, even though I've *never* done anything out of malice or hate. I suppose not caring about real-life things very much doesn't help 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




).

I *abhor* the principles of the "one night stand", but do appreciate that in rare cases even drunken casual sex *can* lead to a long-term loving relationship.

Since I simply wouldn't function in (or attend) any normal social situations in which guys meet girls (hating alcohol, awkwardness, wanting to learn/read/computerificate/watch anime/play games instead), and I've essentially exhausted possibility from my current academic social sphere, the going plan is to stumble across someone thoroughly compatible at University next year.

Don't get me wrong, with people I'm comfortable with I'm as social as hell, but when I'm trying to determine if I like a girl I'm hopeless (I don't believe in starting a relationship before you're fully convinced you're compatible. I'm aware of how that could be a major catch-22, but I would regard it as morally irresponsible). It gets me down, sometimes, knowing that for the entire period of being 15 to 18 I *know* that I won't encounter anyone to start a relationship, but I persevere. (pillow hugging 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




)

With regards to sex before marriage: Marriage is an inherently religious extension of a permanent socially-accepted relationship, and as such I probably won't ever "get married" (I'm an Atheist, so shoot me 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




). But the fact that it's "before marriage" doesn't bother me at all - it's just that my opinion is that sex should be *absolutely* confined within a single, intended-to-be-permanent, loving relationship between two mutually-inclined partners. If you *know* that you love each other, and you're 15, go ahead. If there's uncertainty, or it's just "for kicks", I disagree.

So yeah. Great thread, by the way. Nice way to vent, and to think things through. And to see into the minds of our fellow Tempers.

EDIT: And no, Alcohol is *not* a fix for Confidence, it just makes everyone involved stop thinking. Which means that when you sober up, you will not still be in that "loving relationship" you don't remember experiencing the night before.


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## granville (Jan 3, 2009)

dewp said:
			
		

> granville said:
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It's not a good fix for the wallet though.


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## dewp (Jan 3, 2009)

yeh i know - really though it's sad to hear this is the case with you you must have some kind of friends surley? - I hope it gets better for you

also,  great post aphirst


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## granville (Jan 3, 2009)

Basically, no friends. I NEVER go anywhere or do anything. I'm not trying to get you to pity me, I'm just saying it the way it is. I consider the people on GBAtemp my friends, but I don't know if that counts.


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## nin10do (Jan 3, 2009)

granville said:
			
		

> Basically, no friends. I NEVER go anywhere or do anything. I'm not trying to get you to pity me, I'm just saying it the way it is. I consider the people on GBAtemp my friends, but I don't know if that counts.



you just described me lol.
i do have a few freinds but don't go out very often. unless theres a new movie in the cinema, then i gotta watch it.

i'm in  my early 20's.
still a virgin.
and yes it's really imprtant to me.
plan on waiting till marriage.
though i need to remember that most girls don't care about virginity.


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## Just Joe (Jan 3, 2009)

At what age did you do it?
-15

Was that experience good/bad (good sex, bad sex?)
-Overall bad. Both been drinking. I was nervous and very self-conscious of the whole thing.

How do you feel about it, are you sorry for not waiting, for someone other/better/more special?
-No, getting the first time out of the way was the best thing. Plus what really counts as special? I've just come out of an eight year relationship with someone I thought I could've spent the rest of my life with. What if I had waited for her? Would have seemed a little pointless now.

Do your parents (if you're young) know about it, and do they approve it?
-Didn't know. Probably wouldn't have cared as long as I was safe. 

How much virginity actually IS IMPORTANT to you? Do you want to wait for marriage, do you enjoy one night stands, do you want to do it out of a love with your partner?!
-It's not important to me at all. I've got no problem with people choosing to wait, or with people who sleep around. I used to have one night stands before I got into my relationship, but I don't think that's what I want any more.


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## The Fat Controll (Jan 3, 2009)

QUOTE said:
			
		

> How many of you have lost virginity (had their first sex)?
> 
> Not me.
> 
> QUOTEHow much virginity actually IS IMPORTANT to you? Do you want to wait for marriage, do you enjoy one night stands, do you want to do it out of a love with your partner?!



When I lose my virginity isn't a big deal. 

I had a pretty bad breakup ages ago and that's made me cynical about relationships. It's not self-esteem that's the issue for me, but that I just don't feel trying to strike up a relationship with any girls I know is worth the time and effort involved. Bar some goddess who shares my interests coming into my life or my attitude changing, I expect to be a 40 year old virgin 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




EDIT: Oh yes, I'm 17. Plenty of time


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## dewp (Jan 3, 2009)

Just Joe said:
			
		

> Was that experience good/bad (good sex, bad sex?)
> -Overall bad. Both been drinking. I was nervous and very self-conscious of the whole thing.



Should have the opposite effect


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## pieman202 (Jan 3, 2009)

i'm 14 and i haven't lost my virginity yet lol my parents would make a big deal about it but not in the way you would expect lol my mum told me to tell her when i'm planning to start so she can buy me protection lol


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## Salamantis (Jan 3, 2009)

nin10do said:
			
		

> granville said:
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And me 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 Like you said I do have some friends, not much, but we don't really do anything out.
Oh well, at least I have the Temp.

@topic, nope I didn't lose mine yet. (I am 14/almost 15 if that matters)


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## legendofphil (Jan 3, 2009)

*How many of you have lost virginity (had their first sex)?*
I haven't and I am 25 (probably the oldest here).

*How much virginity actually IS IMPORTANT to you? Do you want to wait for marriage, do you enjoy one night stands, do you want to do it out of a love with your partner?!*
On this side it seems like a big deal but on the other I imagine it will be like "what was I so worked up over".

At this point in my life I assumed that I would be either married or in a relationship but that never happened.

My problem is that I am not a social person, don't get me wrong I have a fair few friends and I can make friends easily enough but with women its different. I have always had a problem with talking to women and I don't take rejection well. Not that I actually meet many.

Some of my friends give me advice and its not helpful to me like:
"Go to more parties and you will meet someone there"
"Go drinking (bar, club, etc) and you meet someone there" for starters I don't drink any more.

I don't think anything good of a one night stand, I know people that started relationships with them but they didn't last.

Over this Christmas I was in (still in) a foul mood and recently I have realised it was because I was pretty much alone. I hate being alone but I just end up in the same cycle and in the second half of the year it will probably get worse when I move out and hopefully get a job as a games designer somewhere.

At times like this when I reflect on these events it makes me fear that they will never change.

Waiting is a good thing, if I met someone tomorrow I would probably wait for sex until we knew each other better.

If I had the chance to go back and tell myself what I know now to when I was first interested in girls I would tell myself "You will be rejected a lot in your life but don't let it put you off and don't be complacent about finding a girlfriend. You will regret not trying harder and its easy to get too comfortable in a place you don't want to be."


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## Ferrariman (Jan 3, 2009)

Not me, and I don't plan to for some time.

I don't get out often. I'm only 13.

One of my classmates lost his virginity at the age of 12, and he said it was the worst choice in his life.


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## nin10do (Jan 3, 2009)

yeah only now have i come to understand why women are so much more confident. they get hit on all the time. guys are expected to be the ones to make the first move. and as such we'll be the ones to get an answer, whether yes or no. if you get a lot of no's it doesn't mean your bad at dating. it's just how the system works.
a couple of years ago if i got rejected by a girl i'd be crushed. have a much better understanding of things now.

every year i think i have life figured out 
	

	
	
		
		

		
			





 only new things keep happening that change my perspective.


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## isugoat (Jan 3, 2009)

legendofphil said:
			
		

> I don't think anything good of a one night stand, I know people that started relationships with them but they didn't last.
> one night stands and relationships usually don't go hand-in-hand. one night stands are for gettin laid, not for finding a wife.
> 
> QUOTEWaiting is a good thing, if I met someone tomorrow I would probably wait for sex until we knew each other better.


what about waiting is good? the odds are overwhelming that anyone you date won't have waited...


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## Doomsday Forte (Jan 3, 2009)

Oooh, mental scarring topic.  *posts*

*How many of you have lost virginity (had their first sex)?*
Well...not I.  23 and I'm still unsexed.  But, I've actually had the opportunity and refused.  I mean...I'm in no rush.  XD  That and I wasn't really fond of her to begin with so yeah.   I'd rather wait until it's with someone I love instead of it being a lustful action.  

*How much virginity actually IS IMPORTANT to you? Do you want to wait for marriage, do you enjoy one night stands, do you want to do it out of a love with your partner?!*
It doesn't really matter much to me.  To be honest, I think a guy like me is screwed either way with a girl.  If she's a virgin, there's a high chance that it will be a bad experience for the both of us, especially her.  If she's not, then there's a high chance that I will simply be bad at it in her eyes--and in both cases, turn her off of the idea completely.   =P

*Looks or personality?*
I used to be a looks kind of person, like we all were at one time, I'm sure.  But, looks are never eternal, and personality goes a long way.  So yeah.  Enjoy your supermodel girlfriends and the like for now.  If you guys survive to old age, I hope you enjoy her wrinkles quite well.  :3

I actually have heard of someone who nearly had sex with a girl at age five (they were the same age of course).  FIVE.  What the hell?  Though...anymore, it seems like we're having sex at younger and younger ages.  Pregnancies too.  I wonder if Maury Paternity Test Super Hour still has on those girls who want to have babies ASAP so they can dress them in Gucci and whatever high-class shit they obviously can't afford.


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## zidane_genome (Jan 3, 2009)

I'm 27, am married, and lost my virginity at age 19.  No, I didn't wait for marriage, I was your typical horny teenage guy... luckily the first girlfriend after graduated high school (she didn't go to my school) was a HUGE nympho... she wanted it like 6 times a day.  And no, I'm not kidding about that!

We broke up after she cheated on me... kinda saw that coming, but you know what they say... hindsight is 20/20

Seriously though, wait till your at least 17 if you want to have sex... and for god's sake, wear a fucking rubber!  I don't care if it's against your religion... if wearing a rubber is against your religion, having sex before your married is too!


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## Cablephish (Jan 3, 2009)

I understand that majority of the people don't wait. I look at the people in my high school, and yes I'll assume. I'll look at every person and say if they've lost their virginity. You can tell by the people and the way they act, who they hang around, and I for one do not want to be a part of it.

Loss of virginity really isn't that big a deal to me. It's just another one of those things that I don't have an absolute critique on. If you want to, do it. If not, don't. I've got all the patience in the world, and I'm not gonna get pressured into doing anything. Other people I know always talk about this sort of thing, and I don't see what's to it.


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## Neko (Jan 3, 2009)

I don't think it's important but I still got mine.
Don't see why people make such a big deal about it, it's a normal thing. 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	



Also I don't think I'm going to lose mine soon, although it could change if my GF really really wants to do it.


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## Densetsu (Jan 3, 2009)

*How many of you have lost virginity (had their first sex)?*
*_raises hand_*

*At what age did you do it?*
I was 19 when I lost mine.  

*Was that experience good/bad (good sex, bad sex?)*
Overall it was really good.  It was her first time as well.  It felt surreal, like I couldn't believe it was actually happening.  

*How do you feel about it, are you sorry for not waiting, for someone other/better/more special?*
I don't regret it at all.  It turns out that she's my fiancee now.  She's my first and only girlfriend, the only love I've ever known.  

*Do your parents (if you're young) know about it, and do they approve it?*
They've known for years.  Her father also knew that we were already having sex when we started dating.  After dating her for about four months, she invited me on a beach trip with her family.  They rented a house on the shore overlooking the ocean.  One day he called me over to talk to him in private, and I had no idea what he wanted to talk to me about.  So he and I took a walk on the beach.  We had a casual conversation, then he suddenly switched gears and said, "you've been sleeping with my daughter, haven't you?"  I nearly shit my pants.  I had no idea how to answer him, and I was desperately trying to come up with a convincing lie, my lip was trembling and I was stuttering.  But then he laughed and said "You can tell me the truth, I can already see it in my daughter's face.  Sex changes a woman, you know.  You think I don't know when my own daughter is in love?"  I finally gave in and said "yes, we've uhm, had s- uh, slept, er..."  And then he smiled and said "I don't mind, but I just have two rules: First, you make sure that you wear protection."  I nodded my head stupidly.  "The second rule is that I want her to finish college and have a career."  Again I nodded my head.  Then he said "OK?" and shook my hand.  After that I've always had a deep respect for my girlfriend's dad.  He really was the kind of guy you could talk to about _anything_.  Unfortunately, he died of renal (kidney) failure a few years ago, but I've kept my promise to him.  She's going to be a doctor, and I'm going to marry her.  I just wish he could've lived to see it.  

*How much virginity actually IS IMPORTANT to you? Do you want to wait for marriage, do you enjoy one night stands, do you want to do it out of a love with your partner?!*
It's not so much that I think keeping your virginity is important.  It's commitment that's important to me.  Barring religion, I think the main argument for keeping one's virginity is that people are either not ready for that kind of relationship or because they're not sure if he/she's the "right one."  If it's someone you're really into and that person is really into you, just let things run naturally and see where it goes.  If it feels right, go for it!  But one-night stands are for chumps.  Any dumb-ass can fuck.  Hell, animals do it all the time.  It takes a real man/woman to commit.


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## Wabsta (Jan 3, 2009)

*How many of you have lost virginity (had their first sex)?*
Me
*At what age did you do it?*
I just turned 16
*Was that experience good/bad (good sex, bad sex?)*
good =) was the first time for both of us.. so it was kinda weird and stuff tbh 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	



*How do you feel about it, are you sorry for not waiting, for someone other/better/more special?*
No, I think she is the perfect one. I'm with her for over a year and a half now 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	



*Do your parents (if you're young) know about it, and do they approve it?*
Yes, my mom actually bought my my first condoms
*How much virginity actually IS IMPORTANT to you? Do you want to wait for marriage, do you enjoy one night stands, do you want to do it out of a love with your partner?!*
Well, I do think that you should only do it with someone you really love and trust.


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## Cyan (Jan 4, 2009)

legendofphil said:
			
		

> *How many of you have lost virginity (had their first sex)?*
> I haven't and I am 25 (probably the oldest here).


Wrong 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 I'm older, and I'm sure it might be other people even older.



*How many of you have lost virginity (had their first sex)?*
I don't, and I'm almost 31.

*How much virginity actually IS IMPORTANT to you? Do you want to wait for marriage, do you enjoy one night stands, do you want to do it out of a love with your partner?!*

Sometime I feel sorry for waiting that long. Even if I didn't really waited something in particular except someone to do it with.
I'm not waiting for marriage.

First, in college (11 to 15 Year old in France), I wasn't in the same boat than others : they were wishing for girls and trying to touch her as often as possible. They were obsessed, and I was shy and thought they were dumb, I felt out of this world.
I wasn't interested into going out with a girl like others, because for me it looked like others only dated with every girls they known from the same class, when it ended they changed girlfriend with another one, and for me the love was needed first so it was out of question be interested into girls this way.
I needed to love to date. but without seeing girls, I couldn't fall in love with anyone :/
That's when I found my shyness, and I'm still very shy with other people (not only with girls).


Then, High school time, everyone spoke about girls, sex, date etc.
I didn't like the idea of being the one who didn't know it, so I started wishing to lose my virginity with another virgin so I wasn't the inexperience guy with the experienced girl. Then again, I never met someone, and never tried in fact.

After school, I never get out of my home but for work. I don't know anyone in my town, and I'm too shy to go out with people.

I never met everyone, and time passed until now.
Now I think I'll never find a virgin again at my age, and I forgot that idea long ago XD
That's why I think the time made the thing even more difficult to manage. The more I wait and the more I think it's hard to meet someone.
It will come when it will come. Maybe never. I don't want to do it just to do it, or because it's "too late". There is no time out nor obligation.

Sometime I'm wishing to be a couple too, like others I known at school and I see again now married and with children.
I'm thinking about how it could be for my first time, why I will accept it, how long from meeting someone to having sex, how it's working to be with someone... many questions I better not think, because it's giving me a bad mood  
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




I'll just continue living days after days, as life is coming, and I better forget about all that.



Edit :
Forgot to tell about how sex has alway been seen as a bad thing for me.
From young days, when parents jump on you to put their hands on your face to cover your eyes to not let you watch the TV because there is two people kissing, or showing their body part ; to the actual days with everything in the culture being forbidden : "not recommended for young children", "under 18", "censored" even in games, anime, movies, advertising, etc. everywhere there is something to remember sex is bad.
All in the society is made to make you feel guilty about sex, I'm still imbued in that idea, and think it's a bad thing. I'm ashamed when I see TV with people having sex, or even nudity, and I can say EVERY American movies have that sort of scene nowadays XD

So it's even harder for me to accept being with someone.

edit 2 :
I'm atheist, so there is no religion telling me how I must act with sex (it could have been linked). that's only my way of thinking.


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## Anakir (Jan 4, 2009)

Densetsu3000 said:
			
		

> *How do you feel about it, are you sorry for not waiting, for someone other/better/more special?*
> I don't regret it at all.  It turns out that she's my fiancee now.  She's my first and only girlfriend, the only love I've ever known.



Good for you. It's rare to find people who stick with one person and only love one person. I find that really cute.


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## beefymeatloaf420 (Jan 4, 2009)

[Deleted comment]


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## blueskies (Jan 4, 2009)

zidane_genome said:
			
		

> I was your typical horny teenage guy... luckily the first girlfriend after graduated high school (she didn't go to my school) was a HUGE nympho... she wanted it like 6 times a day.  And no, I'm not kidding about that!
> 
> We broke up after she cheated on me... kinda saw that coming, but you know what they say... hindsight is 20/20


I think we might have dated the same girl. 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




I was 20 when I lost my virginity. I was somewhat anxious about being a virgin all through high school, but didn't really do much to fix the problem. I had a few girlfriends and we fooled around some, mostly just fingering and handjobs, but I never pushed it. I wanted to make sure that she wasn't uncomfortable, and was basically waiting for her to give me the green light (never happened in high school).

College is a whole 'nother story, had great fun, met a girl who made it clear she wanted to sleep with me, so I went for it. We had been drinking a little that night, but I was aware of everything and had a great time with her. Funny thing about that night was that I didn't orgasm at all, and we fucked for almost an hour. I think I was worried about premature ejac, and it eventually just 'went away' (oh, and I didn't ever tell anyone that.. HA!). After that we dated for a few months and had sex everyday, it was awesome. The best was waking up and doing it first thing in the morning. 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




After her there was one other time I got really drunk/stoned/coked with some friends and ended up sleeping with one of them. 

After that, dry spell.


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## Vincent T (Jan 4, 2009)

granville said:
			
		

> I'm 20 and a virgin. It's not important for me to keep it, it's just out of my hands as to whether I can have sex. I'm also very shy around girls, so I don't even know if I'll ever be able to develop a relationship with a girl. It's been years since I've been actively engaged in ANY sort of social activity. I don't know how I'll be able to handle college (doubt I'll ever be able to afford it anyways).
> 
> That being said, I'm a little sad that I'm unable to develop a relationship with anyone. I'd certainly like to have a girlfriend, but I just can't. I don't have a social life, but it's not due to my lack of confidence, but the fact that I'm financially burdened (got no car, and no other way to travel anywhere).



Same , but im 13.


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## Bamboo (Jan 4, 2009)

Virginity ? what is it ? nothing
I lost it at 22,
I had wanted to have sex probably since I was 16 so I had tried to have sex for 8 years but i was to damn shy!!!!
For 8 years I had imagined what it would be like and thought it must be amazing.
Finally when I did it I was a bit disappointed ...like nothing amazing happened...
it didnt change me
I didnt feel more of a man 
I didnt feel more fullfilled .
I didnt feel any different from virgin / non-virgin.
it just felt kind normal and...yeah it was ok.... but I thought it would solve all my problems and be the best thing in the world.
Boy am I glad I didn't wait until I was married before I tried that.

I am still with the girl I "lost" it to and I wonder if sex could be better with another girl.

I personally (and sadly?) dont have much faith or good feelings towards marriage.
My parents divorced and even before that I didnt feel they had much love between them.
Most marriages around me have either broken or are bad.
I am having big trouble trying to see marriage as a sacred thing or even a fun thing.
I look around me at married couples on weekends -the romance clearly dried out in there relationship.

anyway another thing I Would like to add:

TO THOSE WHO ARE WAITING TO MARRY BEFORE SEX

My Christian uncle waited until he was married before he lost his virginity.
When he was in his 20's he got married. I know he thought "if I hold out until I marry the girl I love I can have a life of marital bliss of hot and cold running sex when ever I want it." Boy did he get a big reality check- wife doesn't want to have sex as much as he does.

I think you need to have sex long before marriage at least with the one you love. 
Otherwise you are taking a lucky dip! Sex I think is an important part of love, so you need to see how your sex life is with the one you love BEFORE you marry them. Maybe you'll find out that they only want sex once a month when you need it everyday ? then you are sentenced to a hell of constantly wanting sex. will you cheat on your wife to satisfy ? or will you be faithful ? this could be a real dilemma for those who wait. 
Talking is not enough..how people behave about sex is something that you cant predict chemicals change in the brain and body and unpredictable things happen. 
You need to try it before you tie the knot.

Yes our Morality and intellectuality can override our "animal instincts" and internal desires but you have to ask is this always a good thing ?
Maybe when you body is telling you to have sex....you should sometimes listen.
One day youll realise how short life is and there really isnt enough time to do the things you want to do let alone wait and expect to be able to do them later.


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## Nathan-NL (Jan 4, 2009)

NekoLeah said:
			
		

> I don't think it's important but I still got mine.
> Don't see why people make such a big deal about it, it's a normal thing.
> 
> 
> ...


I am getting the feeling that you are embarrassed by your own post, lol


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## pika3000 (Jan 4, 2009)

I'm a virgin and proud to be, I was bullied for some time in high school when I would say that I didn't care about that kind thing which only made me want to loss it less, whenever the subject has been brought up for a friend its just about always trouble.


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## kylehaas (Jan 4, 2009)

Hah! I'm not having sex until I get married! (I'm aiming for after college)
I don't mind waiting. It's against everything for me to do any different.
I refuse to masturbate too; I'll be honest, I want to love my future wife a lot more than my hand.
If I had to choose between losing a hand or losing my wife, I'd lose my hand.
Logic, it is a wonderful tool. I just hope I can find a girl who would do the same for me...


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## skyman747 (Jan 4, 2009)

Bamboo said:
			
		

> TO THOSE WHO ARE WAITING TO MARRY BEFORE SEX
> 
> My Christian uncle waited until he was married before he lost his virginity.
> When he was in his 20's he got married. I know he thought "if I hold out until I marry the girl I love I can have a life of marital bliss of hot and cold running sex when ever I want it." Boy did he get a big reality check- wife doesn't want to have sex as much as he does.
> ...



Good point. I think that Morality can over-ride some animal instincts (Vegetarians and eating meat), but I think your sexual drive is something you can't ignore. Sex is a very important part of a relationship. If you and your partner don't have similar sexual drives, then like bamboo said, you might be driven to cheat, just to sastify that sexual urge.


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## Densetsu (Jan 4, 2009)

I was never a believer in the whole "wait-for-marriage-to-have-sex" idea, but I certainly admire those who are disciplined enough to do it.  It shows a level of integrity that is rare in a lot of people.  

_*However*_, the potential problem in waiting for marriage is that sex issues can arise after you're married that you never would have expected.  As Bamboo said, you're taking a chance when you wait.  Sometimes people don't find out until after they're married that their husband is impotent, or that their wife "always has headaches and doesn't feel in the mood," which means that even after they get married, there's no sex.  Many of my friends (male and female alike) tell me about their sexual problems and frustrations.  It seems superficial, but sex is a big part of married life, and when you can't have it, it puts a strain on the relationship and can even lead to divorce.  

If you're going to wait for sex, you should at least be extremely open with your significant other in talking about it.  You should be able to discuss your most explicit fantasies, maybe even watch some hardcore pr0n together.  Even if you can't go that far, at the very least you should be able to talk about it freely.  That way you can discover potential sexual issues before you're locked to each other in matrimony.  If your partner is uncomfortable talking about sex, you either have to find a way to help him/her overcome it, or consider ending the relationship to prevent bigger problems down the line after you're married.


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## Little (Jan 4, 2009)

I'm clearly most def a virgin of the purest kind. I'm saving my self till my 30th birthday.... and if i'm married, i'll then uh "carry out this act" in order to have a child.


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## golden (Jan 4, 2009)

*How many of you have lost virginity (had their first sex)?
At what age did you do it?*
I haven't and I'm 16. I don't plan on losing it till I'm 18 or older but I do plan on losing it before marriage. I just don't really see the need to "do it" in high school. 

*Was that experience good/bad (good sex, bad sex?)*
IDK, can't say since I haven't yet but I think it will be great/bad depending on who you choose to do it with. That's probably why so many people on this thread say they didn't enjoy it and others say it was great. 

*How do you feel about it, are you sorry for not waiting, for someone other/better/more special?*
I feel anyone should do what they want after age 18 without any regrets. It's life. However, under 18 it's slightly risky since it is a fact that you aren't that mature yet no matter how much you want to say you know what you are doing or you are more mature for your age. There is a reason you become an "adult" legally after 18. 

*Do your parents (if you're young) know about it, and do they approve it?*
IDK I don't think they would care. They would just want me to be safe.

*How much virginity actually IS IMPORTANT to you? Do you want to wait for marriage, do you enjoy one night stands, do you want to do it out of a love with your partner?!*
Virginity isn't important for me at all. No, waiting till marriage is kind of retarded, it's like digging your own hole in my book but I completely respect other people's choices if they decide to. I can relate this question to a very humorous episode of "Drake and Josh" for anyone that watches it, I'll just slightly change it so that people understand that don't watch the show. In one episode, Drake is in a serious relationship with a girl and his brother Josh says that  it's getting really serious between the two and Drake gets very annoyed. He says "they are just going out" and nothing more. Josh says there's nothing wrong with having a close relationship besides just "going out" and Drake explains to Josh that "Girls are like candy". He says, "let's say each girl is a different type of candy. You like gummy bears? You can enjoy that kind of candy but that doesn't mean that needs to be the only candy in your life. One day you want liquorish or another day you want chocolate. Why would you want to only stay on the gummy bears?" It's an effective simile. Not trying to demean girls but it can be said the same for guys too in a girl's perspective. Waiting till marriage is dumb IMO because then your stuck eating gummy bears for life.


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## papyrus (Jan 4, 2009)

I lost mine just last year and Im 20. To me that experience was okay not that great. I did it with my first gf well shes experienced but then she was in pain. She told me that the pain was like her first sex. To me virginity is not a big deal.


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## Panzer Tacticer (Jan 4, 2009)

Hmmm another interesting thread.

I suppose being a father of a 14 year old, I've likely 'lost my virginity' 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




But I wasn't all that in a hurry in my case, as I was one till I was 25.
Granted, I didn't really give myself much of a chance. Unlike today's generation of internet dwellers (which are usually a bit nerdy and likely more likely virgins because you spend too much time alone in your room on your computer 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




), I spent all my time in a library with my nose in a text book (there was no internet in my youth eh).

But between 20 and 25 I was not abstaining, I was just not getting anywhere 'getting lucky"


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## Maktub (Jan 4, 2009)

Hm, for me it seems that most of the posters in this thread seem to want to dosify their sex. Things like "not until", "not before", "only after", "I plan on losing it when"... I don't know, but it all sounds as if you wanted the perfect setting for the first time. Why? Do you expect to have the greatest ride on a bike the first time you use it? Or make the best test in a subject on the first term?

Also, the fact that we use the term "lose"... well, it sounds as if we were losing something, when we're actually gaining experience, knowledge about the very same life (and its origin) and rejoicing in pleasure.

Yes, this is an apollogy of sex. Seriously, there's no hurry, but there's no reason to fear it or postpone it if one feels like it


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## Toni Plutonij (Jan 4, 2009)

WOW, so many interesting posts and thoughts!

Mine first time wasn't that good at all, I somehow always imagined that it should be perfect and all, but first sex won't ever be the best you'll experience, from my opinion, if you're with the girl that you love, first sex is something that should be done, so you can enjoy in sex after!
First sex will always be kinda weirdish, probably both of you will be shy (unless the girl is a nympho), and it'll never turn out the way you expect it, but every other time after the first, it'll be better and better and better..

I'm still with the girl I had my first sex, we're engaged as well, in a relationship 4 years and a bit over 1 month..Before that we were friends for a year or so, so I know her really well!
I really feel like I found the love of my life, and will spend the rest of it with her!
At the beginning we were really maniacs about sex, lately sh has some problems, we'll have to go to surgery and all that bad stuff, so we're "taking a break" from physical activities..


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## Vater Unser (Jan 4, 2009)

I'm almost 21 and still a virgin...
Never really made an effort to lose it. I'd just feel awful walking into some club and basically get some chick I don't know AT ALL to sleep with me.
That kind of "dating" just screams of desperate horniness...Could as well visit a brothel 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	



That's not saying I'm not open for one-night-stands...But walking up to some strange girl and touting for her affection just to get her to do me  would make me feel disgusted of myself. And without wanting to judge every one of them, it's mostly those kind of chicks who (for me) don't seem to have any appealing personality whatsoever.
I wouldn't say 'no' if I just randomly met a nice girl, maybe through a friend or something, and we got into talking and sometime later ended up in bed, though. I just didn't have that kind of luck so far 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	



Well, that was I lie. I did have that kind of luck once, and recalling that day, she would've probably totally fucked me, but I was too much of a pussy to ask her. Blast it! 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




Anyway, on top of it, I also just don't feel comfortable with my body shape at the moment. I lost almost 25kgs like 3 years ago, but again gained like 10kgs ever since. Damn, that was my chance to go. 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	



Even though many chicks told me I'm "not fat at all", I'm absolutely positive I am. Fuck their sympathy, I don't need anyone to tell me that I _don't_ need to lose any weight, when it's obvious I do. Well, I'm far from the shape of a sphere, but still like 20kgs overweight.
I've been planning to regularly visit a gym for like a year now, but there's always been something else that kept me from doing it...Mostly the ridiculously high monthly fees most gyms ask for. But now that I'm going to university, I can train for much cheaper (like 60€ for half a year - that's 10€ a month, and the gym's supposedly just as good as any other gym). Once exams are over, I'll start bringing my body back into shape. Going to university is without any doubt the best chance ever in life to meet some awesome girls, so wish me luck 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




It might interest you to know that I've never even really fallen in love with a girl, either. I dunno, I think I was just unlucky enough to live in a small town where only stupid cunts live. Now that I'm living somewhere entirely else, I've already started to meet girls who, well, kinda apply more to my tastes 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




I also don't take virginity that important. If I get the chance to shag a girl, I won't spend too much thought on whether she's the right one or not. Unless of course it's obvious it'd make things worse in the end, like her being an ex-girlfriend of one of my friends, who happens to still love her, or something. Of course, if I'm not attracted to her in the first place, I won't do it. But it's pretty obvious to me that my first time will most likely not be with a girl I really, REALLY love, so that doesn't leave all that much room for disappointment. Yes, it'd be awesome if it really was the perfect girl for me, but I'm certainly not planning on still being a virgin when I'm 30. The sex itself doesn't have to be super-orgasmic, either...How rude would it be to say "Man, that was so bad, I really wish I didn't sleep with her"? If some girl said the same thing about me behind my back, that'd be like my worst nightmare.
I also don't care if it's vaginal, anal or oral sex...Personally, I think it's just retarded to make any difference there, like "Hole Nr. 1? Na-ah, not yet! Hole Nr. 2? There you go!". That really makes no sense to me, unless the girl's maybe still afraid of vaginal sex for some reason. If she doesn't want the guy to penetrate Hole Nr. 1 just in order to "keep her virginity", she shouldn't fuck him AT ALL, period. Is that what virginity is to some people? Keeping the hymen, a fucking piece of skin? That's the dumbest definition of virginity I've ever heard of, ever. So when a girl breaks her hymen masturbating, she's not a virgin anymore? Holy fucking god. Defining losing virginity as getting penetrated in the vagina is just equally dumb. Anal sex means that a guy sticks his wiener into a girl's pooper. So "reserving" hole nr. 1 for "the right guy" pretty much translates to "I'm not the kind of slut who loses her virginity to the first guy, but still enough of a slut to suck on his cock and let him penetrate my ass". Congratulations, I don't care, you still lost your virginity, since you fucking fucked a guy, for christ's sake.
What if two people really love each other, but just prefer oral sex, or something completely different, let's say bagpiping? Will they be virgins forever? What about homosexual people?
Who even got up with this ridiculous excuse for not losing virginity by not having vaginal sex? "Son, say, did you have sex with that girl?" "No, I didn't*! Hihihi!" 
(* We just had _anal_ sex!)

It's the thought that counts, the decision to bend over for a guy, not the goddamn hole you get fucked in. Anal, vaginal...Isn't it both the same act, done for the very same reason?


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## Agjsdfd (Jan 4, 2009)

i am no virgin, and am pretty ez going... if you know what I mean 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




.  I dont really bother. AND I dont know how much it changed me...

@Vater Unser
how much do you weigh lol? why concerned bout weight?


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## Shabadage (Jan 4, 2009)

I was 15 when I lost mine with a girl I had been dating for about 3 months.  It was extremely awkward (Both our first times), but we both enjoyed it enough to continue screwing like rabbits for 5 more months till I moved to Colorado.  This girl was my first love, and as is typical with first loves; you never forget them.  We'd frequently hook up whenever I went back to RI, though I do still feel guilty about some of those times (one/both of us weren't single).

I wouldn't trade those times for anything in the world.  There was something pure about it; something I've rarely been able to capture again.  I have a feeling it's because of that first love thing I previously mentioned.


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## golden (Jan 4, 2009)

Vater Unser said:
			
		

> I also don't care if it's vaginal, anal or oral sex...Personally, I think it's just retarded to make any difference there


wait, are you saying there is no difference between the two? wtf serious? outside of defining virginity or whatever your post was about, there really is a huge difference there.


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## Licardo7 (Jan 4, 2009)

Edgedancer said:
			
		

> Kind of off topic but do many of you, particularly the people in school, objectify girls, only looking out for the "hottest chicks" or do you actually look for personality.


Yes, I do look for personality because I learned that most of the girls that are in my school that are "smokin" are stuck up bitches and shallow. I don't objectify girls but it's hard not to get distracted once in a wile. 

I have lost my virginity to my hand  
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 at the age of  
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 I think 12 or 13 and it was meh. Planing to lose it in college or something but I won't rush. Mean wile I have to rely on my hentai.  
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




P.S: yay, new smileys


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## Vulpes Abnocto (Jan 4, 2009)

Licardo7 said:
			
		

> I have lost my virginity to my hand
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Many of this thread's respondents seem to define the loss of virginity differently from one another;

but I think most of us can agree that _this_ does not constitute a loss of virginity.




Not even if you had friends watching.



No offense intended.


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## Twiffles (Jan 4, 2009)

Nope, I still have mine in tact.. Could have lost it, but choose not to. Saving it for when my girlfriend wants to, I guess.
Kinda hard, seeing as she is afraid of men in general. Oh well, I'm not going anywhere anytime soon. I can wait.


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## golden (Jan 5, 2009)

Vulpes Abnocto said:
			
		

> Licardo7 said:
> 
> 
> 
> ...


I'm pretty sure that was a joke as in he is still a virgin but jacks off.


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## Cyan (Jan 5, 2009)

golden said:
			
		

> Vater Unser said:
> 
> 
> 
> ...




it's a matter of culture.

I know American people have a different culture about sex than European. 
I learn it on a TV report. Though it may have been wrong, but judging the comment here I see it's a fact.

For American, oral sex is not sex and is not a sin or a betrayed, like President B. Clinton did announce it without a problem, because it's not considered an offense as if it was vaginal.

American young people can have oral or anal sex and still says "I didn't have sex yet".


For european culture, sex in "having sex" is right to the moment it involve penetration.
Only masturbation is not considered virginity loss (but may be a point of view to some people).
As for blowjobs, I think it's most considered masturbation than having sex and losing virginity.


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## Toni Plutonij (Jan 5, 2009)

Cyan said:
			
		

> it's a matter of culture.
> 
> I know American people have a different culture about sex than European.
> I learn it on a TV report. Though it may have been wrong, but judging the comment here I see it's a fact.
> ...


I'll backup on that, also from this thread I see that American people tend to do oral sex and anal sex before vaginal, so they would "preserve" himen (or virginity.....yeah right 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 )..
But here, oral sex isn't _that_ spread, you'll get some girl to sex with you easier then blow you, and anal sex is something that's rarely done, and much less talked about!


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## Shelleeson (Jan 5, 2009)

Canonbeat234 said:
			
		

> tinymonkeyt said:
> 
> 
> 
> ...


are you serious?
i don't wanna burst your bubble here but you had sex it doesn't matter which hole you put it in 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	



there's a saying in the uk, every hole's a goal (yes i know it's not a very nice saying but i didn't make it up)
it's like saying because someone has a caesarean they don't have kids (or they haven't given birth) 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 or if they didn't inhale they haven't really smoked 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	



you may not like the person or the situation you had it in but you don't get to wipe it away
don't think i'm having a go at you these are just the facts
yep i've had sex although i wasn't very happy about it the first time it happened neither was i sober 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	



gin = bad day and silly decision making


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## Maktub (Jan 5, 2009)

Toni Plutonij said:
			
		

> Cyan said:
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Now that's soemthing really interesting and with which I'll have to agree, too.


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## Vincent T (Jan 5, 2009)

Nope, haven't lost it yet, only 13 years old. A long way to go.


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## Eternal Myst (Jan 6, 2009)

Lost it.When I was 13 I banged a cute guy.I was gay back then.I fucked never got fucked.
Looking back now I do regret it.

at 15 I decided\changed\whatever to go straight and have fun with girls, but it was anal sex.

When you live in a shithole of suburbia and have an empty wallet, and have no parents, and your sister is your poor guardian, and everything in life bites you in the ass...well you need something to make you happy every once in a while.

I don't think that having anal sex counts as losing your virginity.

I wouldn't know, and I wouldn't care.


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## Maktub (Jan 6, 2009)

You... "decided" to go straight..?


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## shadowboy (Jan 6, 2009)

I'm a virgin, and think sex w/o love is meaningless.
I don't care if the girl is a virgin tho.

My girlfriend is a rape victim :/ 

So yeah, pretty fucking depressing shit.
Kinda made any horniness I was starting to develop hit the floor...  if we are truly in love then I know eventually it will happen, if not I don't want her to have to deal with something like sex again...
:<  God fucking hate how horny men are to do something so despicable.


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## xLadyKx (Jan 6, 2009)

I'm not a virgin. I've been with my guy for 5+ years. I lost it at 17. 

My parents were strict. My mom wanted me to wait until marriage. I know my dad was hoping but all he really told me was to wait until I was in college (and out of the house lol) to start dating at least.

I never really thought about it. I knew it would happen when it would but I was in no rush. I absolutely knew that I wouldn't wait until marriage though, just until I met someone who was worth... sharing myself that way with.

Well anyways, lost it at 17. Got pregnant at 17 and had my son at 18. Yes, we were using protection. So we raised him together, got our own place and whatnot. 2.5 years later, I got pregnant again and had my 2nd son (with the same guy). So now I'm almost 22 (will be on the 26th of Jan) and I have a 3 year old and a 5 month old. I don't have any regrets, I love my life. I am extremely lucky that it worked out in my favor.

With all that said, I just hope that young people who aren't waiting for marriage really think about the consequences of having sex. Protection is never 100%.


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## golden (Jan 6, 2009)

xLadyKx said:
			
		

> I'm not a virgin. I've been with my guy for 5+ years. I lost it at 17.
> 
> My parents were strict. My mom wanted me to wait until marriage. I know my dad was hoping but all he really told me was to wait until I was in college (and out of the house lol) to start dating at least.
> 
> ...


call me crazy but condoms are 90-98% protection so you guys just got *EXTREMELY EXTREMELY* unlucky. But it's great it worked out for you guys in the end.


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## nin10do (Jan 6, 2009)

Toni Plutonij said:
			
		

> I see that American people tend to do oral sex and anal sex before vaginal, so they would "preserve" himen (or virginity.....yeah right
> 
> 
> 
> ...



it seems they loose it at an earlier age too. tbh is there really any point in waiting? or is it better to get the hype thing outta the way?


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## OSW (Jan 6, 2009)

Not a virgin. lost it to my first and current GF. I feel happy to have lost it to her.

I am her second. It didn't bother me at all at the start, but when i started to hear more about her ex, and had issues with her (i got ditched couple of times, cheated on, and she abused my trust, feelings etc etc), it all fucked my head up a bit.

It's still a bit painful but she's really treating me good now. As long as it continues then we'll be good together i think, i still love her strongly but the trust isn't quite the same.

Overall, I think virginity is not meaningless, and it's very nice to lose it to someone you love. But you gotta live with the way things are, so if you really care about someone enough you would get over it. 

I also think I'd be hard pressed to expect to find many virgins who are 19/20 (most of the people i hang out with are these age).

IMO the past is the past, the important thing is the person that they are now (some people change, some people never change, be careful).


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## Toni Plutonij (Jan 6, 2009)

Eternal Myst said:
			
		

> Lost it.When I was 13 I banged a cute guy.I was gay back then.I fucked never got fucked.
> Looking back now I do regret it.
> 
> at 15 I decided\changed\whatever to go straight and have fun with girls, but it was anal sex.
> ...


Well, the only point in waiting for losing your virginity is to maybe lose it with someone you love! Having anal sex and thinking that you're still virgin is really stupid! You had sex!! Now that's it!!

Some people feel ready to have sex at age of 15 (and get chance), and some people aren't ready even at age 20....That's just the way that human body works!


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## Eternal Myst (Jan 6, 2009)

Toni Plutonij said:
			
		

> Eternal Myst said:
> 
> 
> 
> ...




Changing the gender that you want to suddenly fuck isn't really that difficult.Maybe I should have stated that in my younger age I was in Palestine.Which is an islamic country.That means girls don't go around exposing themselves, or anything.Girls\Boys go to different schools.Girls are not allowed to leave the house.Girls only get exposed to the opposite gender when they are in college.

If you don't know were I am going with this.....then take a sharp guess.I was never really gay.I just wanted to be sexually active, and fuck anything that was available at the moment.I don't lie very often.

Im glad I left palestine.You don't know how it feels to hear\see death every fucking day.On the news pictures of young children dying in the gaza strip, and the violence of the hamas, fateh movements that inspired revenge, suicidal bombings.
I felt reborn when I left Palestine.Even though every part of me aches to go back.I don't really have a family to go back to, and the sexual behavior between men in Palestine was very "unusual".

So much for an Islamic country that says alcohol, and having sex with the same gender is, haram.

Toni, I don't lie very often.Also I will stop trolling, and become more of an asset than an anchor by helping out in gbatemp like I used to.


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## nin10do (Jan 6, 2009)

Eternal Myst said:
			
		

> Toni Plutonij said:
> 
> 
> 
> ...




whao duuuuuuuude. i come from a pretty uptight cultural background myself. thoughts of turnign gay did cross my mind but i'd never actually do it. went to an all boys school myself. i also went to an all boys university. i'm sorry how things worked out for you. hope you manage to come back from it all. 

i have a freind in palestine and he told me things are pretty bad there. 

(trying to stay relevent to post.)...
there is another side to the story though. i have grown up with people with a strict background that waited till marriage for sex. a lot of them were really pissed that they couldn't have sex that early. but now at 23-25 most of them are happily married. and when i talked to them about it most (not all) tell me they are glad they waited. i guess it's all aobut personal prefference.


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## Issac (Jan 6, 2009)

_How many of you have lost virginity (had their first sex)?_
I have.
_At what age did you do it?_
Just turned 18.
_Was that experience good/bad (good sex, bad sex?)_
It was... alright... my first time, of course a bit awkward and insecure.. but overall good!!
_How do you feel about it, are you sorry for not waiting, for someone other/better/more special?_
I'm happy about it, since it WAS that special one


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## Toni Plutonij (Jan 6, 2009)

Eternal Myst said:
			
		

> Changing the gender that you want to suddenly fuck isn't really that difficult.Maybe I should have stated that in my younger age I was in Palestine.Which is an islamic country.That means girls don't go around exposing themselves, or anything.Girls\Boys go to different schools.Girls are not allowed to leave the house.Girls only get exposed to the opposite gender when they are in college.
> 
> If you don't know were I am going with this.....then take a sharp guess.I was never really gay.I just wanted to be sexually active, and fuck anything that was available at the moment.I don't lie very often.
> 
> ...


OK, this post sounds far more honest and true..
I'll apologize for calling you out like that, I know that life there is really though, I'm glad you settled it after some time..

I'm really glad to hear that last part of your post, and I really do hope you'll keep your word, because I remember you as a good member, not troll who doesn't care if he'll get banned or not..


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## Maktub (Jan 6, 2009)

If people just normalized sex, you wouldn't give a damn about virginity or stuff. Natural (and I'm talking about something anyone with some psychology basis will understand - for others just wiki/google it) behaviour in children is to explore and have sex. If you manage to educate children into having contact with that part of their lives without becoming a threat to social behaviour (like, having sex with their syblings anywhere in the street 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 ), then they won't grow up repressed and do much of the kinky stuff some people end up doing (raping included, as a violent way to distress oneself from a hard repression).

Also, @Eternal Myst: I'd say your sexual "label" is rather bisexual as it seems you didn't have any problems when it came to having sex with guys. In that sense, I'd understand why you could "switch" between genders you had sex with. Anyway, it's a little bit stupid to label sexual behaviour.


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## GamerzInc (Jan 6, 2009)

I'm 19 and I'm perfectly fine with being a virgin.  In highschool I wasn't as much bothered with having sex but I was given protection by many family members.  Throughout highschool and now through my second year of college I've pretty much done everything sexually related except for vaginal intercourse.  I just haven't found that special woman.  Personally I don't care about my virginity I'd just rather have sex with someone I actually love.  Each time a girl has personally come up to me and asked me to have sex with her I've declined.


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## R2DJ (Jan 6, 2009)

Holding it off for a girl who I will have a very good relationship with.

Most likely a girl that's fit and has a good attitude (don't want to deal with a nice-looking girl who is actually a gold-digger)


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## Doomsday Forte (Jan 6, 2009)

xLadyKx said:
			
		

> I know my dad was hoping but all he really told me was to wait until I was in college (and out of the house lol) to start dating at least.
> Wanted you to wait until college to start _dating_?  Good lord!  The average age for starting out dating was around 13 during my generation, probably has gone down in recent years...but hey, at least you've been with the same guy this entire time.  Glad to hear that.  =P
> 
> 
> ...








  *revokes your Man Card*
*shot*


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## newyears1978 (Jan 6, 2009)

I waited til I got married to have sex, I was 21.  Good decision and I think that everyone should do this.

Unfortunately for me I ended up getting divorced so saving myself didn't really turn out all how I thought..but still to this day (I am 31 now) I have only had sex with my first wife and now my fiance..and I find it better this way..


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## sprogurt (Jan 6, 2009)

i think that if 2 people are in love then that's just a way of showing each other that just like cuddling but more intimate.


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## xLadyKx (Jan 6, 2009)

golden said:
			
		

> call me crazy but condoms are 90-98% protection so you guys just got *EXTREMELY EXTREMELY* unlucky. But it's great it worked out for you guys in the end.
> 
> No, we just got extremely, extremely *LUCKY*. We're still together, our boys are healthy and they have everything they need and too much of what they want. We have our own place and my hubby's making good money (especially with the way the economy is going) and I get to stay home with the kids and focus on getting my degree. We still get to indulge in things we want as well and our fridge is always stocked. What more could I possibly ask for?
> 
> ...



Yes, my dad wanted me to wait until college to start dating. Funny how he tried to be so strict about that and this is how things turned out. (Obviously they were so strict that I rebelled) But oh well, they absolutely love my kids now and they're happy that I'm happy. We have a better relationship now.


Toni - I'll post pictures up of my boys.. maybe one of me lol.


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## nin10do (Jan 6, 2009)

xLadyKx said:
			
		

> No, we just got extremely, extremely *LUCKY*. We're still together, our boys are healthy and they have everything they need and too much of what they want. We have our own place and my hubby's making good money (especially with the way the economy is going) and I get to stay home with the kids and focus on getting my degree. We still get to indulge in things we want as well and our fridge is always stocked. What more could I possibly ask for?








 i luv happy endings.


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## War (Jan 6, 2009)

Ah, the subject of virginity. Personally, I find it so sickening how most teenagers treat virginity nowadays. Apparently, they think its "cool" and some sort of achievement to lose your virginity, and the younger you lose it, the "cooler" you are. Just thinking about that infuriates me. 

I'm not religious at all, but I still think that you should only have sex when you are with someone you REALLY love and you know things will work out with them. I'm 17, still a virgin, and I don't plan on losing my virginity at LEAST until I get out of high school. Hearing about kids my age losing their virginity just sickens me. Call me old fashioned like that, I guess.

I just don't believe that 13-17 (God forbid any younger) year old kids know what love is, and shouldn't be having sex just for the hell of it. I'm not saying IM an expert, or that I know what love is, because I don't. But having sex at such a young age can be really life-changing, especially for kdis that don't know the consequences. 

My parents are divorced, and I live with my mother and sister while my 2 older brothers live with my Dad in South America. My dad is one of those dad's that think that drinking is okay for a 15 year old, and having sex isn't a big deal. Because my brother grew up living with him, my brother had tons of sex at the age of 16+. What did that lead to? Right now, he is 21, has 2 kids, hasn't finished college (after dropping out), has a crappy job that doesn't make him enough to even support himself, has to borrow money from my dad monthly just to get by, and he's not even with the mother of his children.

That's one of the main reasons why I want to wait for that special someone, and I want to wait until my situation is a little more planned out. Yes, I know there's condoms and pills and all that, but there's ALWAYS that chance that the girl can still get pregnant.


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## knilsilooc (Jan 6, 2009)

16 years old, still a virgin. The current plan is to wait until marriage, something that my girlfriend and I both agreed on. However, I don't suppose it would be that bad if it happened before that, especially if it's with someone I truly love.


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## Calafas (Jan 6, 2009)

Not a virgin, however i lost my virginity to my current girlfriend, and we're still together well over a year later (started about 2 months into our relationship).  Both our parents know, her mum even put her on the pill just to make sure, and her mum doesnt seem to mind, and my parents dont mind aslong as we're safe and sensible.
She was my first time, at age 15, but i wasnt her first time at age 13, which is kinda worrying and really plays on my mind, and can quite upset me sometimes, but what can i do about it?  
	

	
	
		
		

		
			





  I guess going into was quite worrying, knowing she'd had sex before, so it wasnt going to be like both our first times, i was worried she'd kinda, be expecting a certain standard, if you like, and it was my first time, what if i wasnt good enough?  :S
She 'cheated' on me a bit into our relationship, she didnt sleep with the other guy, but they did stuff, however i didnt find this out till around a year in, if i'd have found it out in the first couple of months, it would have probably been over then, but we'd been together for a year, and it was only a month into our relationship, but that still plays on my mind also.
But at the end of the day, I love her, our relationship isnt only about sex, we go out, we have a good time, sure we have sex, but thats an added extra - our relationship isnt built on it.


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## Toni Plutonij (Jan 6, 2009)

xLadyKx said:
			
		

> Toni - I'll post pictures up of my boys.. maybe one of me lol.
> I'd really like that
> 
> 
> ...


Yeah, finding out that one that you love actually messed with somebody else during your relationship can really create a big chaos in ones head..
I can only imagine how that felt, but I'm glad that you're actually "over" it...
I hope you won't experience something like that ever again!


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## Ellara (Jan 6, 2009)

Mid-20's and still a virgin. I think it'd only be lost if it was via coercion/rape, because I'm just physically & mentally not interested in having sex.  
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 I've never been attracted to anyone, not even other women, and my body has never had those urges so it's like... meh, it's just not for me I guess. No need to seek it when I have no needing for it. I think even if I did consent to it freely it'd be pretty boring yet physically painful (arousal and attraction are very important for making sex pleasurable).

Asexuality: Making committed relationships impossible in the long-term!


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## EmperorOfCanada (Jan 7, 2009)

Ellara said:
			
		

> Asexuality: Making committed relationships impossible in the long-term!



Explain?


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## Ellara (Jan 7, 2009)

EmperorOfCanada said:
			
		

> Ellara said:
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Asexual person wants companionship, but not sex because they don't have the urge or attraction necessary to want it. Finds great friend whom they want to spend the rest of their lives with. Friend is not asexual and wants sex in their long-term relationship. Conflicts arise over the needs of both (very unwanted for one, vital need for the other). One or both partners are unhappy when compromise has to happen or non-asexual partner seeks physical gratification elsewhere with/without permission. Inevitable break-up occurs.

Yeah, it's a vicious cycle.


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## EmperorOfCanada (Jan 7, 2009)

Ellara said:
			
		

> Asexuality: Making committed relationships impossible in the long-term!



Fixed! I figure as long as both partners are Asexual, it works out great!


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## Ellara (Jan 7, 2009)

EmperorOfCanada said:
			
		

> Ellara said:
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Haha, yes! Asexuals are pretty rare to find as it is, but it does work when they find each other and are compatible. After all, you couldn't expect a gay man and a straight woman to be happy in a (non-open) marriage. Them urges be wantin' satisfyin'. No shame in admitting that on some level it is hardcoded to be satisfied sooner or later.


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## Maktub (Jan 7, 2009)

War said:
			
		

> Ah, the subject of virginity. Personally, I find it so sickening how most teenagers treat virginity nowadays. Apparently, they think its "cool" and some sort of achievement to lose your virginity, and the younger you lose it, the "cooler" you are. Just thinking about that infuriates me.
> 
> I'm not religious at all, but I still think that you should only have sex when you are with someone you REALLY love and you know things will work out with them. I'm 17, still a virgin, and I don't plan on losing my virginity at LEAST until I get out of high school. Hearing about kids my age losing their virginity just sickens me. Call me old fashioned like that, I guess.
> 
> ...


Firstly, I don't think "kids nowadays" think it's so cool. Specially I've realized teens in the USA think it... "special" to save virginity. It's OK, for me, but specially teens don't really know what they want 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 also, mind me, but you yourself are a teenager (like me, lol) so no big deal. We're each unique and it's not such a good idea to generalize. If you're of certain opinion it'll sound like the ones with the opposite opinion are more abundant, that's all.

Anyway, my li'l bro is about your age and he never had sex (AFAIK). He's into drugs, can barely read and isn't even capable of getting a job in a construction or something like that. Me, I began having sex at a very early age and continued doing it up to now, I'm finishin my degree in English Studies with honours, have a girlfriend with whom I feel very happy and don't even smoke a joint. So, I don't think blaming sex for those things is always appliable.

I think one of the main reasons for all this "too young for" is the fact that we want to protect kids from those things. By doing it we make them ignorant. Age=/= wits. If we assume younger=stupid/innocent, then we're actually making them even more ignorant.

Anyway, that's just my point of view. I think you're right when you say many think of it as an achievement. Nearly of all the friends my age were keen about sex and stuff when 12/13 or so. I think the "right" thing would be just to be neutral about that fact. It's not really important either way.


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## Jarjaxle (Jan 7, 2009)

How many of you have lost virginity (had their first sex)?
still a virgin

At what age did you do it?
havnt yet

Was that experience good/bad (good sex, bad sex?)
dont know yet hopefully its good

How do you feel about it, are you sorry for not waiting, for someone other/better/more special?
dont know yet

Do your parents (if you're young) know about it, and do they approve it?
my parents wouldnt care they know i make good decisions and plus im 19 so why would they care

How much virginity actually IS IMPORTANT to you? Do you want to wait for marriage, do you enjoy one night stands, do you want to do it out of a love with your partner?!
i would like to do it with someone i love 



as for the hot girl thing i was never like that surprisingly but all my friends were then they would tell me that the girl they were after wasnt to bright or just a bitch. im interested in the personality body is just a plus. but i have a hard time getting into a relationship girls always think of me as their best friend or im just to weird its kind of depressing.


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## War (Jan 7, 2009)

Maktub said:
			
		

> _*snip_


I disagree with you. I've attended many different schools in 3 different states, and everywhere I went, sex was a huge "cool status" thing. If you wanted to be "cool", you HAD to have sex by your Sophomore year. I had a friend who I guess was considered "popular", and he told me that a lot of other friends heavily pressured him into having sex, and even threatened to stop being friends with him if he was still a virgin by a certain date. Sure,  it's not ALWAYS like that, and of course if they were his real friends they'd never make him do something like that, but I just wanted to show you an example on how sex is viewed in my experiences through high school. 

Also, I'm not saying that my brother's life is the way it is because he had sex at a young age. I'm saying that because he had sex and got his ex pregnant twice, his options became very restricted and he had to do things he wouldn't have had to do if he didn't have his children.


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## KingAsix (Jan 7, 2009)

well I'm not sure how deep this topic has gotten as it has went from two pages to eight since the last time I looked at it but I will answer the original question posed.

I am a virgin and even though my church strongly believes that it should be saved for marriage, I'm not. Even though I still value it enough to save it for someone special....until then I got Mr.Lotion


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## miruki (Jan 7, 2009)

War said:
			
		

> Maktub said:
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Well, isn't it more of a problem that children aren't educated enough about sex, so they become curious, nobody talks about it with them so it's kind of a taboo thing and well, it's always been cool to break taboos... I'm pretty pissed about the fact that too many children start doing it without even realising what they're really doing, but it's been like that when I was 13 too, it hasn't started that recently but it's already been like this since years. I'm very glad I've protected my virginity for 18 long years (until I finally had my not-so-amazing first sex) and I'm also very glad my little brother (16) is taking this stuff seriously too. 

Anyways, I don't want to sound mean or anything, but it's your brother's fault for being stupid enough to nail a girl without a condom, doesn't matter if she _says_ she's taking the pill, I wouldn't trust that if I don't know the girl for more than a few months and have seen her doing it. And besides pregnancy, there's so many other ugly stuff that can happen without the use of condoms.. *sigh* I wish they'd teach that stuff to children more properly and parents would talk to their children about it much more as well, I'm a mother myself so this stuff annoys me alot - I'll make sure my son won't just make a random 13 y/o pregnant and that he'll think of the experience of first sex as something special so he'll wait for the right girl. *nods*


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## Taza (Jan 7, 2009)

There's some hilariously naive posts in this thread: Notable highlights are aphirst's on page 2, kylehaas' on page 4 and War's on page 7.

But before I explain, some honorary mentions:

Vater Unser: +5, Insightful. (page 5)

Eternal Myst: You're probably bisexual preferring women, something like 2 on the Kinsey scale probably.

Ellara: Asexuality. Rare and treasured. It might be related to depression; try treating any such disorders if you have 'em. If not, try either a cuddlepile (polygamous closed relationship) or a hugbox. In any case, take up science if it doesn't go away - asexual scientists have less to worry about and therefore can perform research significantly better.

Mention for closed-minded person of the thread:

Toni Plutonij. Shame on you. Sexuality comes in aplenty of flavors and gay people can indeed turn straight and vice versa. Not all gay people can/will, not all straight people can/will, but it decidedly can happen.

And now for the diamonds of insight:

For everyone I've called naive *especially* and in general to anyone waiting 'til marriage: Look at Cyan and newyears1978. The chances of your first love being your true love, with what most people not waiting with sex 'til marriage and a divorce rate of 50% are hilariously slim. Heck, the chances are you'll find out a few things you want in a companion more every time you find a relationship unsustainable.

And keeping alive an otherwise unsustainable relationship is a recipe for violence, misery and psychological disorders. It turns from a relationship into something that not only corrodes itself, but the people involved as well.


Me? I lost my virginity at the age of 18. Decidedly meh, though I don't regret it - if anything, I wished I'd have had sex sooner, might have saved me from a lot of bad things. The trust between me and my companion at the time? After the relationship ended, I got a STD check. Fortunately, I was clean.

Which is really what I suggest everyone to do. Pick someone you can trust, both get tested, arrange a fitting form of protection, and get those urges sated. Preferably more or less as soon as they begin to really bother you. Love's good, but not mandatory, friends with benefits works too.

Because, well, love is painful, wonderful and pointless, very often. It's an experience quite unlike any other, but in the end it does not conquer everything. Heck, there are plenty of perfectly mundane things most people will encounter that love won't conquer. Doubly so for long distance relationships. Bad idea btw.

Say you're 13 and want to have sex? Use protection, go for it, and if you switch partners, for the sake of everyone, get yourself tested every now and then. It's certainly better than finding out your One True Love you want to be forever with isn't anything of the kind, driving you to a murder-suicide. No personal experience though, I just started drinking hard booze. And yeah, I was 100% sure, and after that relationship I wised up and got a STD check.

In hindsight, those aren't diamonds of *insight* per se. I think they're more diamonds of cold hard experience.

EDIT: And by god, masturbate. Constantly repressing and denying your urges is what causes both rapists and cancer, both universally agreed to be bad things.


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## Toni Plutonij (Jan 7, 2009)

Taza said:
			
		

> Toni Plutonij. Shame on you. Sexuality comes in aplenty of flavors and gay people can indeed turn straight and vice versa. Not all gay people can/will, not all straight people can/will, but it decidedly can happen.


You're obviously got really wrong impression about me, I'm not closed-minded at all, and you can't actually comment on my post about Eternal, because that was totally subjective opinion, pointed exactly at him, not my general opinion on the matter..
As you saw, Eternal started to troll lately, and I thought that this post was troll attempt and not his real experience, I would expected something like that from member that blogged about his sexual urges towards his cousin (or something like that)..
So you're wrong about that..also, you're wrong in your opinion about 13 years old having sex!
They aren't physically evolved enough to do it!! (in most cases), not to mention that they are really too young in their heads..
I really don't know any, and I really mean ANY person that would be OK with their 13 years old daughter having sex!!

It's always easier with the boys......but when you have daughter, fathers are always overprotective, and encouraging sex at that age is really bad idea.....


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## Taza (Jan 7, 2009)

Do you know the age of consent in Japan?

What about Sweden?

Heck, in the case of young teens - Germany and Canada with their exceptions?

EDIT: Clarifying. The age of consent in Canada is 12 as long as the partner is no older than 14.


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## EmperorOfCanada (Jan 7, 2009)

I lost my virginity to Toni last month in EOF... it wasnt consentual.....


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## Calafas (Jan 7, 2009)

Toni Plutonij said:
			
		

> you're wrong in your opinion about 13 years old having sex!
> They aren't physically evolved enough to do it!! (in most cases), not to mention that they are really too young in their heads..
> I really don't know any, and I really mean ANY person that would be OK with their 13 years old daughter having sex!!
> 
> It's always easier with the boys......but when you have daughter, fathers are always overprotective, and encouraging sex at that age is really bad idea.....




But the society we're living in today, it doesnt fall to parents to 'encourage sex', even at that young age, there will be pressures from friends at school, or all the 'popular' kids doing it, even at that early age.  Now if you had children, knowing that the moment they get into high school they're going to be subject to all this kind of talk about sex, instead of trying to stop it (which would likely cause the child to rebel making them more anxious to try it!) wouldnt you rather sit down with them, and explain to them yourself about the consequences, and *really* being safe, maybe even talking to their partners parents about it, if theyre of a relatively young age?  
The point is, they're exposed to all of this at school and maybe if they go out or whatever, wouldnt it be better for parents to talk about the emotional side of it and that (i know children get sex ed. at school, but a 1 to 1 with parents would be better), instead of trying to stop them doing it, which could cause them to rebel, or feel sexually repressed when they grow up?

[note, not wanting a flaming argument/to troll, just want a serious convo   
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




]


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## Toni Plutonij (Jan 7, 2009)

Calafas said:
			
		

> But the society we're living in today, it doesnt fall to parents to 'encourage sex', even at that young age, there will be pressures from friends at school, or all the 'popular' kids doing it, even at that early age.  Now if you had children, knowing that the moment they get into high school they're going to be subject to all this kind of talk about sex, instead of trying to stop it (which would likely cause the child to rebel making them more anxious to try it!) wouldnt you rather sit down with them, and explain to them yourself about the consequences, and *really* being safe, maybe even talking to their partners parents about it, if theyre of a relatively young age?
> The point is, they're exposed to all of this at school and maybe if they go out or whatever, wouldnt it be better for parents to talk about the emotional side of it and that (i know children get sex ed. at school, but a 1 to 1 with parents would be better), instead of trying to stop them doing it, which could cause them to rebel, or feel sexually repressed when they grow up?
> 
> [note, not wanting a flaming argument/to troll, just want a serious convo
> ...


I'm strongly against that, I said it's not good idea to encourage sex at that age..It's good to start learning your kids about that stuff early, it's good to teach them how to act if they come to that situation, but it's not good to encourage them!!
Would you say to your 13 years old kid, here, have a condom and have as much sex as you can at tonight friends birthday party?!


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## Taza (Jan 7, 2009)

I'd never do that.

I would, however, explain the dangers and advise on the use of protection... far earlier than that.

I don't really care if 13-year-olds have sex. I wouldn't care if they were my kids either. The important thing is to avoid violence and diseases.


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## Toni Plutonij (Jan 7, 2009)

Taza said:
			
		

> I'd never do that.
> 
> I would, however, explain the dangers and advise on the use of protection... far earlier than that.
> 
> I don't really care if 13-year-olds have sex. I wouldn't care if they were my kids either. The important thing is to avoid violence and diseases.


Well, when you put it like that, it's a completely different thing..and I'd agree on that right away!!


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## Calafas (Jan 7, 2009)

Toni Plutonij said:
			
		

> I'm strongly against that, I said it's not good idea to encourage sex at that age..It's good to start learning your kids about that stuff early, it's good to teach them how to act if they come to that situation, but it's not good to encourage them!!
> Would you say to your 13 years old kid, here, have a condom and have as much sex as you can at tonight friends birthday party?!



If my 13 year old kid was going to a party, and might be having sex, im not saying i'd be happy about it, but if you cant stop them (well you could physically, but could lead to them wanting it more), wouldnt you rather send them on their way with some protection, if theyre going to anyway?


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## Toni Plutonij (Jan 7, 2009)

Calafas said:
			
		

> If my 13 year old kid was going to a party, and might be having sex, im not saying i'd be happy about it, but if you cant stop them (well you could physically, but could lead to them wanting it more), wouldnt you rather send them on their way with some protection, if theyre going to anyway?


You're not getting what I'm trying to say!
Kids should know about that stuff really early, but we shouldn't encourage such behavior!

You shouldn't let them go wit the word of praise on that!!


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## Calafas (Jan 7, 2009)

Toni Plutonij said:
			
		

> Calafas said:
> 
> 
> 
> ...



I know what your saying, your thinking that by giving them protection, would be like saying to them its ok to have sex at early age and maybe sleep around, or it may even encourage it!

I'm in school at the moment, and can tell you there's enough encouragement as it is!  Even with the younger children (first/second year of high school) they talk about sex, and you always get the kids who have a rude image or two on their phone, all this is encouragement, and if they're going to them sort of parties, sounds like their friends would be encouraging it anyway.  I'm saying *DO* talk to them about, tell them to let you know if they're being pressured into it, both directly, and maybe indirectly (perhaps the 'popular kids doing it, and so on), seriously think about it, but if theyre in an relationship (even at such an early age), you can see the age of their partner, or talk to their parents about it, and then far from encouraging it, tell them that its a big step and they might not be ready, but if they *really* persist, then i dont think giving them condoms is particularly encouraging it.

But im not a parent, and you're older than me, so who knows, but thats just my views.


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## LightyKD (Jan 8, 2009)

My virginity was VERY important to me, then I gave it to someone that i loved, had a child with her and quickly learned how very, uncaring, crude, unstable and noncommittal she was and now my heart hurts. If you still have your virginity, save it for someone who truly cares about you. I know that most of us guys love to think about getting laid but hell, at least the one's we give out first moment to should be a happy memory not one that hurts every time you think about that day and the aftermath. ...Just my two cents...


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## golden (Jan 8, 2009)

LightyKD said:
			
		

> My virginity was VERY important to me, then I gave it to someone that i loved, had a child with her and quickly learned how very, uncaring, crude, unstable and noncommittal she was and now my heart hurts. If you still have your virginity, save it for someone who truly cares about you. I know that most of us guys love to think about getting laid but hell, at least the one's we give out first moment to should be a happy memory not one that hurts every time you think about that day and the aftermath. ...Just my two cents...
> I'm very sorry to hear that and with all do respect but I just got to say:
> 
> The almost 50% divorce rate in American has to come from somewhere. >_>
> ...


This statement is also pretty dumb. Although advising your kids is your choice whenever you wish whether you want to teach them at age 7, 8, 10, 12, etc. People as young as 13 years old having sex is very bad psychologically. You're thinking you are "releasing" them from being sexually repressed or whatever you said but it actually destroys their life. At the very least you got to wait till 16 or an age where some actual maturity in the brain develops. It's proven kid's brains aren't developed enough at age 13 and they can't reason as well as they should for sophisticated decision that can have long term impact on their lives. At the very least, wait till an age that they start to show that maturity like 16+. 

Oh, but I do completely agree with you on the fact that people should have sex before marriage. It is a pretty dumb idea in my opinion to wait for many reasons but one would be the guy above me that I quoted.


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## Lazycus (Jan 8, 2009)

@ Taza - Good luck when your daughter has a kid at 14 years old or chooses abortion.  I assume you would let your 14 year old child make a choice about abortion since they are old enough to decide for themselves whether or not to have sex at 13.  Would you also be receptive to your 13 year old child having sex with a 30 year old?  Why not?  Are you closed minded?  Surely the 30 year old could educate them about protection and diseases and non-violence.

@ Calafas - What do you mean you can't stop a 13 year old from going to a party and having sex?

It's a parent's job to not only educate their kids about the physical aspect of sex but also the mental and social.  To just hand a 13 year old some condoms and say 'take precautions' since 'they'll do it anyway' isn't much better than telling them nothing.


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## golden (Jan 8, 2009)

Lazycus said:
			
		

> @ Taza - Good luck when your daughter has a kid at 14 years old or chooses abortion.  I assume you would let your 14 year old child make a choice about abortion since they are old enough to decide for themselves whether or not to have sex at 13.  Would you also be receptive to your 13 year old child having sex with a 30 year old?  Why not?  Are you closed minded?  Surely the 30 year old could educate them about protection and diseases and non-violence.
> 
> @ Calafas - What do you mean you can't stop a 13 year old from going to a party and having sex?
> 
> It's a parent's job to not only educate their kids about the physical aspect of sex but also the mental and social.  To just hand a 13 year old some condoms and say 'take precautions' since 'they'll do it anyway' isn't much better than telling them nothing.


100% QFE


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## antwill (Jan 8, 2009)

Lazycus said:
			
		

> @ Taza - Good luck when your daughter has a kid at 14 years old or chooses abortion.  I assume you would let your 14 year old child make a choice about abortion since they are old enough to decide for themselves whether or not to have sex at 13.  Would you also be receptive to your 13 year old child having sex with a 30 year old?  Why not?  Are you closed minded?  *Surely the 30 year old could educate them about protection and diseases and non-violence.*


Surely most of that from first hand experience too no doubt.


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## Filter (Jan 8, 2009)

I never plan to get married so of course I will have sex when ever possible.


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## Toni Plutonij (Jan 8, 2009)

Lazycus said:
			
		

> @ Taza - Good luck when your daughter has a kid at 14 years old or chooses abortion.  I assume you would let your 14 year old child make a choice about abortion since they are old enough to decide for themselves whether or not to have sex at 13.  Would you also be receptive to your 13 year old child having sex with a 30 year old?  Why not?  Are you closed minded?  Surely the 30 year old could educate them about protection and diseases and non-violence.
> 
> @ Calafas - What do you mean you can't stop a 13 year old from going to a party and having sex?
> 
> It's a parent's job to not only educate their kids about the physical aspect of sex but also the mental and social.  To just hand a 13 year old some condoms and say 'take precautions' since 'they'll do it anyway' isn't much better than telling them nothing.


Thanks for putting it in a way that I can't because of my language differences!

Something like that would be my point as well!


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## Taza (Jan 8, 2009)

antwill said:
			
		

> Lazycus said:
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Lookie here, someone already answered one of the points.

Also, the abortion bit? I'd be highly annoyed if it was a result of not having protection, and I'd strongly recommend abortion.

Frankly, "highly harmful"? Talk about brainwashed. Take a look at the history.

Hey, the youngest mother was 5. Which tells us something about the biological part.

EDIT: And to clarify my actual point: I would *educate* my children, from an age even younger than 13. I wouldn't repress them nor try to dictate my values. And if you think having sex at 12 is "HORRIBLE HORRIBLE HORRIBLE" and that 12 year old kids haven't a clue about sex you're kinda naive about 12 year old kids.

They'd want to have sex at 13? Use protection, take your partner into account, etcetera.
They were getting coerced to have sex at 13? Naturally I'd step in.


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## antwill (Jan 8, 2009)

Taza said:
			
		

> Hey, the youngest mother was 5. Which tells us something about the biological part.


Even so, thats still pretty messed up, and no im not saying that because of the impact of western societies views and values, im saying that because at 5 you can still barely care for yourself let alone another living being. I don't see why you would 'strongly reccomend' abortion, wouldn't that put more of a strain emotionally and mentally on the child than say adopting it out? Just my 2 cents, i could very well be wrong.


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## Taza (Jan 8, 2009)

In Finland? Hardly.

Maybe in Glorious America, but here I think abortion is the more accepted choice for being pregnant at that age.

... but if she absolutely refused abortion I'd mandate adoption.


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## LightyKD (Jan 8, 2009)

Taza said:
			
		

> In Finland? Hardly.
> 
> Maybe in Glorious America, but here I think abortion is the more accepted choice for being pregnant at that age.
> 
> ... but if she absolutely refused abortion I'd mandate adoption.



The United States isn't so "glorious". We have our problems and I for one will be one of the dumb ones who act as if we don't. I'm purely against any form of nationalism and can't wait for a global government but until that happens, I can truely say that I'm proud of what the Obama administration represents. "A renewed sense of hope!" Goodness knows we need it because whether you want to admit it or not, we're living in the second "dark ages".


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## Lazycus (Jan 8, 2009)

Taza said:
			
		

> EDIT: And to clarify my actual point: I would *educate* my children, from an age even younger than 13. I wouldn't repress them nor try to dictate my values. And if you think having sex at 12 is "HORRIBLE HORRIBLE HORRIBLE" and that 12 year old kids haven't a clue about sex you're kinda naive about 12 year old kids.
> 
> They'd want to have sex at 13? Use protection, take your partner into account, etcetera.
> They were getting coerced to have sex at 13? Naturally I'd step in.



There was no need to clarify your point.  The only difference is now you have lowered the age to 12.  Of course 12 year olds and younger have curiosity towards sex and should be educated about it.  Of course I think having sex at 12 is horrible.  I think most people around the world (be it 'Glorious America' or glorious Finland or wherever) would agree with me, or am I still being naive?

Clearly you don't have children and I hope you never do until you realize that most kids can't make educated choices about sex (and countless other things) until they reach an age much older than 12-13.  Kids need rules and boundaries set by their parents.  You may call it repression or dictating values but I call it being a loving, protective parent.  To not use wisdom and experience in educating and parenting kids is truly naive and cowardly.


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## LightyKD (Jan 8, 2009)

I would freak and pull all my hair out if my daughter ever tried something at that young of a age. Hell, I really don't want her to start dating till she's 16...LATE 16 lol. Luckily for me I have YEARS before I have to worry about that 
	

	
	
		
		

		
			





 . Still, consider me a protective father.


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## Taza (Jan 8, 2009)

Lazycus said:
			
		

> Taza said:
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Ah, rules and boundaries set by parents. Love those axes, love them... well, I guess those would be guns if you live in Glorious America, but oh well.

My intention is to *educate* my own children, so that they can make educated choices about as soon as they have any need to. Parents controlling the actions of children even 12-13 without being repressive? Fat chance there. You're not a loving, protective parent exercising that much control - you're a tyrant who will be remembered with hate and psychological disorders.

And I think you'd be shocked to your core if you ever met some of the 13-year-olds I've met and grown up with. Not that, I don't think most of them lost their virginity until a few years later - but still well short of 18.

EDIT: Hey, I found an additional thing to note. Most people would find 12 year olds having sex horrible? Not so in Canada, where that is the minimum age of consent. As well as about half of Mexico. And oh, Japan's age of consent is 13. Looks like you're surrounded by people disagreeing with you.

And I would use my wisdom and experience in parenting my kids. My wisdom and experience says that it's better to have your child do the smart thing because he knows why he should rather than because of fear of punishment.


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## Lazycus (Jan 8, 2009)

I'm not sure why you keep trolling with your anti-American statements but you'll get no bite here.  I don't understand the "axes/guns" reference anyway.

If I'm labeled a tyrant for keeping my 12 year old kid from having sex than so be it.  I don't think you'll get one person on here that will reply and agree with you about that.  Visit Canada, Mexico or Japan and talk to the people there and you will be hard pressed to find anyone that wants their kid having sex at 12 or 13 years old.  Maybe it's different in Finland but I think you would still have a hard time finding people who want their kids having sex at that age.

You don't seem to be able to grasp the concept that most 12 and 13 year olds can't intelligently make life changing decisions like having sex no matter how much education they've been given.

"My wisdom and experience says that it's better to have your child do the smart thing because he knows why he should rather than because of fear of punishment."


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## NeSchn (Jan 8, 2009)

I want to lose mine kind of, its kind of hard being around all your friends when they are talking about it and you have nothing to contribute. I want to be in a relationship with the person though before I do anything though, and as we all know from many different blog posts. It's really hard for me to get a girlfriend lol.


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## Taza (Jan 8, 2009)

You wouldn't get the axes/guns reference, only someone with both knowledge of my home area and a passing knowledge of the NRA would. Maybe you do once you've learned everything you will.

I'm not exactly *wanting* kids to have sex at 12, but I'm not exactly hell-bent on stopping them if they want to either.

And you don't seem to grasp that *some kids do anyway* and that sex isn't a huge life-changing decision. It's normal and a part of life and as far as my knowledge goes the age you do it in doesn't seem to matter that much, at least given you've already entered puberty and it's consensual.

13, 16, 19, 21? Well, maybe the 21 is a bit bad, and being a virgin at 24 is certainly traumatic, but the other ones, don't think so.

And why would it be horribly traumatic, given the body is more or less ready at the age between 11 and 15, depending on the individual. Not fully developed to adult form, no, but ready for sex. All trauma attached is merely social, and eventually, social trauma is about hard to come by as sand in Sahara.

EDIT: And oh, if you do keep your kid from having sex at 12 when he/she really wants to, whatever method you use that's more reliable than trusting her, it's bound to be more harmful than the sex would be.


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## Goshogun1 (Jan 8, 2009)

-At what age did you do it?

I was 18.

-Was that experience good/bad (good sex, bad sex?)

It was exciting, new, and overall good. More exited about losing my virginity than actually enjoying the actual act which was unfortunate. (like OMG I can't wait to tell the guys about this LOL)

-How do you feel about it, are you sorry for not waiting, for someone other/better/more special?

I really wish I had waited, because I found out early that people could use sex against you. Right after I found out she was a complete drug addled nut-case. She tried to sleep with all my friends, and make me jealous. Then I found out who she had been with, and it made me feel...dirty. So yeah, I wish I could have waited for someone else.

Personally, I don't think someone's virginity has to be any of their friends business. Peoples peers make too much of a big deal about someone being a virgin or not. Comments like, "What are you gay?", and "What's wrong with you?" turn virginity into something horrible that should be kept secret, when it shouldn't be. It almost turns into a contest, and if you can't keep up you aren't a "real man". I am glad I have gone beyond that, and pretty much keep my relationships separate from what my peers think. Because in the end its  about pleasing me and not satisfying the nosy curiosity of others.


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## Maktub (Jan 8, 2009)

Toni, with all the due respect and about Taza's ideas:

I had sex some time before I was 5 (believe it or not, I'm sorry). I enjoyed it. I kept having sex after that (with several other girls). It was consented by us both and we were about the same age (girls were always older than me in no more than 1 year). No one encouraged us to do so, though.

I can say I don't regret it. I am very happy I had the chance to be far more experienced than any person my age nowadays is/will ever be. No one was hurted in any way and it made me have a different perspective about sex, which is always useful.

Luckily enough, I consider myself a respecting person and I understand my situation is not any normal thing, but I belive it could help some other people to see things differently, so that's why I wanted to share it with you.

Humans have never been too good in measuring life with laws (and will never be, that goes with nature).

Edit: Ah, and my mother gave me condoms at the age of ~10, told me to always be very careful and explained me about those things whenever I wanted to know. I never had any kind of problem related to girls getting pregnang or thinking they would and have always been an anchor when it came to pragmatical information for my friends. I don't know how is someone more prone to get a girl pregnant when being told what condoms are for, than someone who knows nothing about it or scarcely anything (that'd be even more dangerous).


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## Toni Plutonij (Jan 8, 2009)

Maktub said:
			
		

> Toni, with all the due respect and about Taza's ideas:
> 
> I had sex some time before I was 5 (believe it or not, I'm sorry). I enjoyed it. I kept having sex after that (with several other girls). It was consented by us both and we were about the same age (girls were always older than me in no more than 1 year). No one encouraged us to do so, though.
> 
> ...








This is unique experience, and I respect it totally, I actually believe you 100% (from all your posts here and in Girls vs. guys thread)..
My opinion is this:
I don't think that any parent (if normal) would approve that, and although from guys perspective, that could mean experience etc.
Imagine if a young girl at age 5 is having sex with 18+ years old (I mean, you always had older female partner)..That girl at the age of 5 probably won't and CAN'T know if sex is normal, what it is, and if it's just a game or whatever..
Again, there are situations where kids will know very early what is it all about, but this talk fits under child abusing!

I can be openminded, and I believe i am actually open minded person, but in my opinion sex under age of 14 is just wrong, and inappropriate..I don't think that kids can be physically and mentally developed enough to make decision of such importance at that age..I'm not saying that there can't be exceptions, but we're not talking about exceptions here, we're talking about standard overall, in the world!


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## golden (Jan 9, 2009)

Replies in bold:



			
				Taza said:
			
		

> You wouldn't get the axes/guns reference, only someone with both knowledge of my home area and a passing knowledge of the NRA would. Maybe you do once you've learned everything you will.
> 
> *Ohh empty threat. Scary. *
> 
> ...


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## Taza (Jan 9, 2009)

Threat? What threat?

Obviously you don't get the reference. You might in the future, yes, as a result of bad things befalling you. I can't see how that's a threat though. You probably won't get it unless some bad things befall you... not a threat.

I am fine with kids of that age having sex. Me not having any kind of preference is *huge* for this discussion. Not having a preference is one thing, wanting them to is probably illegal.

Are you familiar with the old concept of "if it bleeds it can breed"? Y'know, that isn't a new thought. It's one very old. United States age of consent laws are very much an United States thing, given that the minimum age of consent both in it's northern and southern neighbors is 12.

It ranges between 13-16 in Europe, too. 16 being the minimum borderline... hasn't got even close to universal support. This also relates to the point of trauma - apparently it isn't believed in in a whole lot of countries, civilized, western countries.

And is there a good parenting way to force your child into not doing something? I sincerely doubt it. If the kid wants, he either can find a way or you're a very horrible parent who should have your children taken away from you.


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## Linkiboy (Jan 9, 2009)

This argument won't go anywhere... Taza believes his opinion is right and that sex is ok at that age, and golden obviously doesn't. It will escalate to a flame war with the next reply by either side


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## science (Jan 9, 2009)

I just read about some guy having sex at five and enjoying it.

I'm going to stick waaaay clear of this thread.


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## Problematique (Jan 9, 2009)

I'm young.
Prolly to young to be reading this.
Let's just say im going to high school.
I'm self conscious.
I'm to big of a pussy to even ask a girl out...
What if she didn't like me.
It happened to me once..
It went around  like a virus.
Everyone knew.
People say its easy to get a GF in high school.
Put my low self esteem results in being a pussy.
meaning don't ask around.
my last relationship(2nd one)
ended BAD BAD BAD.
Ill tell you what happened.
I'm the nerdy kid you could say I've got 5-10 friends so one day (around the end of year 5)i was walking to the school library to meat up with some guys
when this chick just walked up and asked me out my lucks like dog shit i didn't belive it a 1st.
So we had it good for about 5 months until
i got some werid messages from here friend like sort of saying DUDE YOUR DUMPED in a nice way,
anyway i ring her up and she just told me shes going to high school and will be busy so your dumped with everything.
I cryed on the phone
I never told anyone this
I never talked to her again
and don't plan to

i worried ill never get that right person


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## Toni Plutonij (Jan 9, 2009)

Taza said:
			
		

> Threat? What threat?
> 
> Obviously you don't get the reference. You might in the future, yes, as a result of bad things befalling you. I can't see how that's a threat though. You probably won't get it unless some bad things befall you... not a threat.
> 
> ...


One question tho, if your kid wants to have drugs at age of 12 (or older, doesn't matter), will you stop him/her or will you encourage him/her or what will you do..

Because if you really forbid him/her to do it, by your own words, he'll find away around and do it anyways!! Because as a parent, you shouldn't forbid them anything, and if they are forbidden, they'll do it anyways!
Let's face it, 60%-80% kids are curious about drugs!!


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## Eternal Myst (Jan 9, 2009)

This topic is very interesting.

I would blame the environment/atmosphere that the 13yr kid lives in.


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## NeSchn (Jan 9, 2009)

Problematique said:
			
		

> I'm young.
> Prolly to young to be reading this.
> Let's just say im going to high school.
> I'm self conscious.
> ...


There is always someone out there for everyone. You just need to find it.
Hey be happy you at least had two girlfriends, I can't even get one. I should post sometime about how many times I tried and got fucked over. So, when that happens you just go onto the next.


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## miruki (Jan 9, 2009)

Gosh, I need to add a few things, as a mother I feel like I should.


First of all, I agree to Taza and Toni, trying to keep your children out of harm by forbidding stuff is not always the best option. I know from myself how that can have the complete opposite effect. What's important is trust, you need your children to trust you so they'll talk with you about the stuff that's on their mind, may it be the urge to have sex or their curiousity about drugs or anything else. 

My father always talked with me about stuff like drugs and it made me completely lose interest in taking anything awful. But just telling your children to never take drugs but not properly explaining to them which drugs have which effect and all and why they are so bad for their body and mind, which kid would listen to a parent like that?

Let me give you an example from my own family. My brother is 16 and he asked our mum if she'd buy him a Shisha (water pipe) from the amazon voucher I wanted to give him as a christmas/birthday present, but she said no, telling him it's not good for his health and she won't buy him one ever! So he called me and told me about it and so I said I'd buy him one, I agree to my mother when she says it's not the best thing for his health, but did she ever listen to him when he said he only smokes apple tobacco once or twice a month? He'd do it anyways, at his friend's place. And it's not like mum's not smoking her cigs everywhere in the flat anyways - which is even worse for his health. 

So, now I'll get him one for his birthday, what I gain from that is his trust and honesty - he'll tell me how often he uses it and he'd also tell me if he ever gets the urge to try something else. 

I really think it's important to listen to your children more, listen to what they really have to say instead of just saying "No!" and "Go too your room and be quiet!" - there should be a friendship between parents and children and both need to be able to accept compromises. You cannot simply control your child, but you can try and nudge them a little to the right direction. That's how I think. 

And you need to educate your child about the things that could harm it, that also includes sex.

I forgot the other things I wanted to say. :>


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## Maktub (Jan 9, 2009)

Well, Toni, I don't think it right to compare sex and drugs *unless* there is risk of pregnancy/STD. Those can be easily prevented with condoms (most of them) and not going around screwing anything that moves 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




. However, you did make a point (in my opinion) when stating that children shouldn't be left entirely on their own. They need a guidance up to a certain maturity (not age, that's something arbitrary and that depends 100% on the individual) and it is (sadly) true that in most cases a great deal of people don't get to fully understand sex when teenagers (some don't even understand it as adults, to be honest).

Linki is probably right too about the argument nearly-everyone vs. Taza is going to become a flame war. I'd recommend Taza to take it easier, as he has exposed his opinion and people willing to hear it, have done already (and even those who disagree will probably have it in count and will have probably changed their minds accordingly, at least a little).

Also, I don't agree on young people (not sexually mature from a physical point of view) having sex with older people (teens and up). Be it girls, or boys. It's just something the oldest one shouldn't approve and not because of morals or laws, but just because the younger one *could* be in a disadvantaged position (meaning the older one should let the younger one get to know as much about life and sex as he/she knows).

@Golden: why 16? where is it stated that that's the best age for everyone? why not 18 or 13? and most importantly - why is it that it *should* be that age? If your criteria are just "because I believe so that way", then I'm sorry to say Taza (or anyone else who bothers on expanding their ideas and making them understandable for the other members) has got way more than a point than you.

@science: ok?

Edit: I think my parents' (my mother's, mainly) view on the subject has been very much like miruki's. Mostly based on treating children as adults learning rather than "to be adults". I guess I'm too "radical" when expressing myself sometimes, but that's just what I meant with my "ideal" way to raise up children.


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## Taza (Jan 9, 2009)

I never disagreed with guidance. In fact, I put forward a defense for education and trust, and letting the child make his or her own decisions.

Because forcing a child to do something or not do something breeds mistrust and hatred, and if you can't rationally defend your point, what are you doing trying to enforce that point in the first place?


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## Issac (Jan 9, 2009)

Taza said:
			
		

> Do you know the age of consent in Japan?
> 
> *What about Sweden?*
> 
> ...



It's 15 years, in Sweden... for anyones interest


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## Maktub (Jan 9, 2009)

Taza said:
			
		

> I never disagreed with guidance. In fact, I put forward a defense for education and trust, and letting the child make his or her own decisions.
> 
> Because forcing a child to do something or not do something breeds mistrust and hatred, and if you can't rationally defend your point, what are you doing trying to enforce that point in the first place?



Well, people usually stick to what they feel is right and are contempt with that. They don't usually bother going any further and finding out why they have those values.  Their idea of guidance is simply different, but I think it mainly leads to the so-called "generational gap" and having the former "kid" beginning from scratch to find a new set of values that suits them better.

edit: 13 y/o in Spain.


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## Toni Plutonij (Jan 9, 2009)

I wasn't trying to compare drugs and sex! I was trying to put down Tazas argument that "kids should be allowed to do what they want when they want because they'll do it with or without your approval so better give it to him"!

To point out, I don't think that Taza has wrong views, maybe he stated few things in a wrong way, and so did I..However, I understand what he means and I agree..

Funny how thing work, because I'm a child of two people that smoke since my birth! I never tried to smoke in my life, I have been in conflict with my parents for a long time, and it was really nasty, I was kicked out/ran away at age of 17, got back soon..After that things got a bit easier..
I know that you can't just forbid something to your child, you have to point your kids in right direction, but you can't always be a friend, parenting must come first!
Everybody has some unique experience in their life, and they form their opinions on that!

Everyone that was involved in this discussion has a point, and is right, some of our views may conflict, but all of us talk about the best way to raise children..

Mine parents found out I'm having sex in kinda nasty way..When I was out of home, while messing around my room, my mom found diary that my girlfriend wrote..She wrote everything that was happening in our lives, and she wrote it very graphically..
But my parents never made a big deal out of it, I actually never had any conversation about it with them..


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## Calafas (Jan 9, 2009)

I think Toni's right here, everybody has different, and everybody has different thoughts on parenting, influenced by their own experiences with their parents!  All these views are right, and if everybody was bought up the same, what a boring place the world would be!  So I think nobody can be *wrong* in parenting, you do what your heart tells you is best for your children, and as long as you love your children, your method of bringing them up matters not so much.  
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




Edit : To keep this topic on track, I think my parents first new i was having sex when they walked in on me and my girlfriend in bed.   :S  It was very embarassing, but they told me to just be safe, and talked to me about consequencews and that (which although learned about at school, it seems different coming from parents), and now they are cool with it   :]


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## Toni Plutonij (Jan 9, 2009)

Calafas said:
			
		

> Edit : To keep this topic on track, I think my parents first new i was having sex when they walked in on me and my girlfriend in bed.   :S  It was very embarassing, but they told me to just be safe, and talked to me about consequencews and that (which although learned about at school, it seems different coming from parents), and now they are cool with it   :]


Thanks 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




And I had a similar episode in my life..
Girl was at my place and we were messing around, and there was a power blackout, it was dark, and I have undressed her, and my mom comes in to bring a candle so we would have some light..
Crazies part was that we haven't even stopped, she just left the candle and got out of the room....
However, even tho it was a weird moment, I wasn't embarassed at all..Now when I think about it, it was just wrong, but then I didn't cared about it..I was young!


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## Calafas (Jan 9, 2009)

Yea, my mum once walk in on similar situation, and starts up conversation with my girlfriend, it was kind of strange, ando nly the other day my sister came in when we were doing it and took some of my money, but i couldnt get up to stop her  >.


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## Noitora (Jan 9, 2009)

Toni Plutonij said:
			
		

> And I had a similar episode in my life..
> Girl was at my place and we were messing around, and there was a power blackout, it was dark, and I have undressed her, and my mom comes in to bring a candle so we would have some light..
> Crazies part was that we haven't even stopped, she just left the candle and got out of the room....
> However, even tho it was a weird moment, I wasn't embarassed at all..Now when I think about it, it was just wrong, but then I didn't cared about it..I was young!


That is totally awkard, I wouldn't want to be your mum Toni. You should have stopped for a min


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## Sonicslasher (Jan 9, 2009)

Calafas said:
			
		

> Yea, my mum once walk in on similar situation, and starts up conversation with my girlfriend, it was kind of strange, ando nly the other day my sister came in when we were doing it and took some of my money, but i couldnt get up to stop her  >.


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## Maktub (Jan 10, 2009)

lol...

Once, when my ex-gf and I woke up in the morning (after having warmed us from the cold Swedish night by means of friction 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




 ), it seems we'd been doing it loud cause her father asked her something like:
"Hur var snoppen?"*
And she was like: WTF  
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




His father is one of those rough Finns from a family of farmers, lol

*"So, how was the penis?"


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## Knarf (Jan 10, 2009)

How many of you have lost virginity (had their first sex)?
Not yet...

How much virginity actually IS IMPORTANT to you?
It really doesn't matter to me. Some people say that the day you have sex is the day you become a man, but the way I figure it your being mature and more of a man by waiting till the right time. Just fucking a random girl doesn't make you any more of a man, it just makes you a pig. BTW I'm 14.

Do you want to wait for marriage, do you enjoy one night stands, do you want to do it out of a love with your partner?!
It all depends for me. If I'm in love with the girl and were both ready I'll... lose my V-card, but I don't think waiting till marriage is necessary.


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## Cablephish (Jan 10, 2009)

In my english class, we read this article that has to do with an adult woman who found out that her adolescent child was having sex, and there were 3 students who replied to her letter, and they all had sex before. I found it pretty interesting, since they had there names and everything in the paper. Imagine if the adults of these teens were to find out. Anyway, I found that pretty interesting.


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## Jdbye (Jan 10, 2009)

Toni Plutonij said:
			
		

> How many of you have lost virginity (had their first sex)?
> I haven't, and I can't imagine why any girl would like me
> 
> 
> ...


Waiting for marriage is not important, but I don't want to rush it either. If the female side thinks it's time, then it's fine. If not, I can wait. 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	



It's important to me that the female side hasn't had too many earlier relationships, it's preferable if she's a virgin, but not essential.


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## miruki (Jan 10, 2009)

Maktub said:
			
		

> lol...
> 
> Once, when my ex-gf and I woke up in the morning (after having warmed us from the cold Swedish night by means of friction
> 
> ...


Omg, both of my parents are like that too, tho they are neither farmers or Finns.. sigh.


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## Jaems (Jan 10, 2009)

I'm a virgin, and not ashamed to admit it.
Maybe because all the girls that are easy at school are, obviously, whores.

I'm saving this dick's first time for something worth while.


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## Maktub (Jan 10, 2009)

Jaems said:
			
		

> I'm a virgin, and not ashamed to admit it.
> Maybe because all the girls that are easy at school are, obviously, whores.
> 
> I'm saving this dick's first time for something worth while.








That's an area feminism should focus on.


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## Jaems (Jan 10, 2009)

Whorism?


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## Maktub (Jan 10, 2009)

The fact that we discriminate someone just because they like having sex (and more importantly, the fact that being a woman will make you more prone to be discriminated because of that). I've read things such as: "well, I'd like my gf to be virgin" or "I'd prefer her to be virgin but... ok".

Sometimes it refers to the fact that the guy will be afraid the woman will be far more experienced - then, I guess it's OK. But most of te time I'm afraid it's just some prejudice that makes people see girls who have had sex before as "stained". That may have had some sort of justification years and years ago when having sex necessarily implied full physical contact (no condom), but nowadays it's completely irrational and an example of male chauvinism. One of the most disgusting ones, from my point of view. Saddest thing is even girls contribute to that thing.

Ah well, good luck with finding a completely pure girl who'll be worth "it" (worth what? as if a dick were a kind of demi-god) and give you the best fuck ever (kinda paradoxical, ain't it?) to all of those people.


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## Gore (Jan 10, 2009)

*At what age did you do it?*
13, few months before 14
*Was that experience good/bad (good sex, bad sex?)*
Not very good, not "bad"
*How do you feel about it, are you sorry for not waiting, for someone other/better/more special?*
I regret it in a sense, but it's not a big deal, actually.. I wish that she didn't tell people about it, although I've almost convinced everybody it didn't happen.
*Do your parents (if you're young) know about it, and do they approve it?*
They do not know, and I would be murdered if they did.
*How much virginity actually IS IMPORTANT to you?*
Unimportant to me.


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## Moots (Jan 10, 2009)

I say if you wanna screw do it. 

If you don't want to then don't 

I want to, so I do.

I don't disrespect/respect people who are virgins/practicing abstenence/sleeping around.

I hold them all at the same respect level. For those practicing abstenence I respect the choice, and the will power it can take. For those who are sleeping around, how can I blame them for carrying out thier purpose as a species? We were built to reproduce and mate just like every other animal on the planet. 

And hey its fun.

JUST BE SAFE!



At what age did you do it?
19 I practiced non religious abstenence until then.
Was that experience good/bad (good sex, bad sex?)
Great.
How do you feel about it, are you sorry for not waiting, for someone other/better/more special?
I later married the girl, then got divorced. Its part of my life, and I live without regret
Do your parents (if you're young) know about it, and do they approve it?
My parents were okay with me having sex at an earlier age than I did, as long as it was safe.
How much virginity actually IS IMPORTANT to you?
Not at all.

And to Gore, convincing people that you didn't sleep with someone is low, very low.

Man up, and own your decisions.


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## Jaems (Jan 11, 2009)

B-b-b-b-but Maktub! STDs!

'Sides. All I meant is that I usually don't like those type of ladies, and they're often not even worth a relationship.
It may be discriminatory, or prejudice, but I'm almost ALWAYS right.

Anyhow, _my_ dick is a semi-god. And so, he deserves a sacred cave to explore.


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## Gore (Jan 11, 2009)

Moots said:
			
		

> And to Gore, convincing people that you didn't sleep with someone is low, very low.
> 
> Man up, and own your decisions.



So is spreading shit to ruin someone. It was a bad decision.


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## Cyan (Jan 11, 2009)

Maktub and Toni, I find interesting what you said here. especially Maktub, you seem to know about psychology too.




			
				Issac said:
			
		

> Taza said:
> 
> 
> 
> ...


It's 15 in France too.
But I never understood why there is this consent age defined, while in the same time having a law against an adult having sex with a minor (15 to 17).
if two 17 years old people are having sex, it's ok.
If one of them turns 18 before the other, it can be considered corruption of a minor and ported to court if the younger's family decided to.

An adult having sex with a 15 to 18 year old, can have 5 years of prison, and 75000 euro amend/fine.
It can go up to 10 years of prison and 150000 euro, if the adult is from the family or someone with authority on the child (teacher for example), or drunk, or if there are more than one adult even watching.
If one is under 15 and the second is between 15 and 18, only the older can be arrested and sent to children court.
I didn't find any law for an adult having sex with a child under 15.

law is


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## Maktub (Jan 11, 2009)

Well, law depends on each country so I can only speak for what I know:

In Spain, people 13 and older can have sex with people their age or older as long as both consent. That's all there is to say as I guess every other situation involving under aged people and adults counts as corruption.

I didn't really study psychology, just read a lot (psychology too, of course) and reflected about every single event in my life. 

Moots, just curious... why the non religious abstinence? I, when younger, decided to abstain from masturbating for around a year just to prove myself capable. Was it something like that?


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## Issac (Jan 14, 2009)

I think virginity should be saved for someone who appreciates it... and not in the "i wanna fark a virgin!" way... 
I mean, someone who think's highly of one being a virgin... and someone who will be there... a long lasting relationship... now, I don't think anyone should wait more than to the point that it feels like it's the right one... may it be on the first date... but when the feeling: "he's /she's the one" appears... do it 
	

	
	
		
		

		
		
	


	




I would feel bad IF my girl wasn't a virgin when we met, i would feel like "she's easy" or "i'm just someone in line to her sweet parts". But that may have a lot to do with insecurity as well, feeling that I'm noone special, and thus the fact that she's been intimate with others before me only puts fuel on the fire...

(and I see sex as the most intimate, sweet thing that two loving people have... that's how I want to see it)


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## Linkiboy (Jan 15, 2009)

Maktub said:
			
		

> Sometimes it refers to the fact that the guy will be afraid the woman will be far more experienced - then, I guess it's OK. But most of te time I'm afraid it's just some prejudice that makes people see girls who have had sex before as "stained". That may have had some sort of justification years and years ago when having sex necessarily implied full physical contact (no condom), but nowadays it's completely irrational and an example of male chauvinism. One of the most disgusting ones, from my point of view. Saddest thing is even girls contribute to that thing.


no one likes throwing a hotdog down a hallway


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## Foie (Jan 15, 2009)

I'm a virgin and proud of it.  Virginity is the last part of you that you can give to a loved one, so it's best to give it to the one you plan will be with the rest of your life.  That's what I think makes marriage so special, and helps make it last.  I plan to be married my entire life, so I'll wait for the perfect girl to come along.  By staying a virgin, I am not just respecting myself, but her as well.


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## Taza (Jan 15, 2009)

And eventually, that is what leads to gigantic disappointments.

Love isn't perfect; love doesn't move mountains; love doesn't last forever.

I'm not a virgin, and I'm quite indifferent about it. It doesn't define me, and if someone sees me as impure because of it they have a snowball's chance in hell to get in my bed anyway.


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## Toni Plutonij (Jan 15, 2009)

Well, you know, many people think very different ways!

Actually, people that think like that (that virginity is of utter importance, and it has to be saved for someone you love) are in minority, looking from this thread..

I respect people with such philosophy! as well as people with philosophy that virginity isn't something sacred, and that you should have sex as much as you can!!

I won't be looking at person differently, although, I would have a problem if my friend is that kind of person that takes advantage of other just to have sex, ie. lies, doing all kinds of stuff just so s/he could have a sex, and then abandons that person!


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## Maktub (Jan 15, 2009)

Linkiboy said:
			
		

> Maktub said:
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Well, never say "never"!

@Taza: You can't just tell people those kinds of things. Those are things that one learns thanks to experience. Sometimes, we refuse to "learn" them, even... It's pointless to try and convince everyone in this thread that you know something they don't. It's pretty much like parents telling their kids what to do about certain subjects. There's no point in explaining practical things, if you know what I mean


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## Taza (Jan 15, 2009)

Maktub said:
			
		

> @Taza: You can't just tell people those kinds of things. Those are things that one learns thanks to experience. Sometimes, we refuse to "learn" them, even... It's pointless to try and convince everyone in this thread that you know something they don't. It's pretty much like parents telling their kids what to do about certain subjects. There's no point in explaining practical things, if you know what I mean



Laughing at them and calling them naive is a reward of it's own though.


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