GBATemp Recommends: Hotel Mario

It's a beautiful day outside. Birds are singing, flowers are blooming... on days like these, kids like you...should be inside, playing the absolute best that gaming has to offer. That's why I'm here, dear friends, to recommend you one of the greatest video games you'll ever experience. If you've been keeping up, you've no doubt played such classics in the past--the greatest of both the Sonic and Zelda franchises. Today, we'll be focusing on another major gaming icon, and we'll be putting some arguments to rest. What Super Mario game is truly the best? There are some easy options, of course: the classic Super Mario World, the inspirational Super Mario 64, or the merely only 8.5/10 garbage outing of Super Mario Odyssey.

But I'm certain that question didn't spring to mind the name of the actual greatest Mario game.

Nintendo may have created the character, but it was another company that really took the series to the pinnacle of gaming perfection. That credit goes to the innovative minds at Fantasy Factory. They may have only created two games in their entire history as a developer, but if you managed to craft the best video game ever, you might quit while you were ahead, too. As a result of the thankful failure of a partnership between Nintendo and Sony, humanity was able to learn of a truly perfect team: Philips and Nintendo, which lead to the beautiful, glorious, Hotel Mario.

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Welcome to the Hotel Mario, such a lovely place, such a lovely face.

This game has it ALL: a story full of drama and intrigue, with unexpected twists that you'll never guess. Where is the princess? How do you save the princess? How did the princess get over there? It also broaches deep, philosophical sayings. I mean, you know what they say, all toasters toast toast. But why do all toasters toast toast? It is one of life's many unexplained conundrums.

Much like the beloved Zelda: The Wand of Gamelon, this game also features a level of animation quality that brings tears to your eyes. Don't look too long at its gloriousness, else you may go blind from its radiance of perfection.

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There's a reason this game has lived on for years after its release, immortalized by the thousands of YTP's existing across the internet, never to be forgotten. Each and every frame of animation is flawless--a true work of art. The voice delivery is just as powerful: I'll never forget the moment that Luigi uttered the phrase, "I hope she made lotsa spaghetti"!

Hotel Mario was a game far ahead of its time, too. Mario goes around placing closed signs all over Bowser and his Koopalings' hotels, because after all, they're not essential businesses. What a hero!

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Still a better love story than Twilight.
So, when you see a remaster of Super Mario 64 or Super Mario Galaxy get released on the Nintendo Switch, vote with your wallet! Don't buy such casual games--show Nintendo that you want to see a remaster of the real greatest Mario game. And with that, I hope that we can all spend this lovely April 1st together, at home, experiencing the best video game to ever exist. Don't forget to practice safe social distancing techniques, too! Some say that the best way to play Hotel Mario is to socially distance yourself from your CDI, TV, and the controller. In fact, the further, the better!

I hope you enjoyed this edition of GBAtemp Recommends. If you'd like to see more, leave your feedback in the thread below or check out our previous articles.

 

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  • K3Nv2 @ K3Nv2:
    Get a 2nd opinion run mris etc they told me that also
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    Also a food allergy study would be a good idea
  • K3Nv2 @ K3Nv2:
    Turns out you can't sprinkle methamphetamine on McDonald's French fries
    +1
  • ZeroT21 @ ZeroT21:
    they wouldn't be called french fries at that point
    +1
  • ZeroT21 @ ZeroT21:
    Probably just meth fries
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    White fries hold up
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    @K3Nv2 sure you can
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    why tf do people hate android users? is it the video quality? just because "AnDrOiD = pOoR" bc they don't cost an arm and a leg like iphones do?
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    i won't be turned off by an iphone, but don't pick on me for having an android, that's just how this shit should work
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    Should say more what these kind of android users say bout nokia 3310 users
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    I've owned both iPhone and Androids over the years. Both are just as good, other than Apples higher price. I'm currently on Android, Samsung S21 I think, and very happy with it.
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    Got my 60 minute steps in whew
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    I get mine in everyday, going back n forth to the fridge for a beer.
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    6,000 steps in so far legs almost broke getting off
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    Your mind gets in a werid pattern of just finishing then when you're done you're like I need a soda
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    You get a "walkers" high?
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    Not really I just use to love building up a sweat
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    Funny, that's what uremum always says
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    Yeah and people that take viagra think they have a big dick
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    You cant fix one insult edit for another edit you pog
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    Nuh I'm on my tablet n it always auto corrects me
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    Heorin and uremum do have close quarters
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    BIG CHICKEN :P
    Sonic Angel Knight @ Sonic Angel Knight: BIG CHICKEN :P