the mother of all bug reports

[Deleted member 319809]

hello, I would like to report a bug with this software.

it DOESN'T WORK.

fix it. thanks in advance.


[now reply as if you were the developer of ANY software EVER and ask me for more information, be creative. I'll continue acting as this user.]

 

[Deleted-236924]

Have you tried turning it on and off?
Have you tried blowing on the contacts?
Did you check to see if your computer is plugged in?
Did you check to see if your computer is turned on?
Are you sure the power isn't out?
Are you sure you installed the software?

 

[Deleted member 319809]

Have you tried turning it on and off?
Have you tried blowing on the contacts?

if I try turning it on and off as you said, I can't open anything else. please don't break all my other applications with your instructions!

also, if I blow on the contacts, they end up really dry and they hurt my eyes when I put them back on. I'd rather not do that.

 

[Deleted-236924]

Fixed it yet?

 

[Deleted member 319809]

Fixed it yet?

no, I'm awaiting further instructions.

well, I was, until I refreshed the page and saw more! man, why does this bug tracker allow edits like that?!

anyway

a) Did you check to see if your computer is plugged in?
b) Did you check to see if your computer is turned on?
c) Are you sure the power isn't out?
d) Are you sure you installed the software?

a) it's plugged in, on the same power socket as this one where I'm typing my bug report.
b) you told me to turn it on and off, but it was already on so I didn't do that and just turned it off, was that wrong?
c) the power isn't out, see 'a'.
d) it's installed! but it's not working. I open it and see a new window, but it doesn't work. that's what I want you to fix.

thanks in advance.

 

[Deleted-236924]

thanks in advance.

Spoiler: mad editing skills

 

[Deleted member 319809]

Spoiler: mad editing skills

yeah, that looks cool and all, but it doesn't help me with my problem!

 

[DSoryu]

Our developers are aware of the problem, so please be patient and expect a fix coming soon.

 

[Deleted-236924]

I'm sorry I couldn't help you further. In the meantime, here's a picture of a duck.

 

[Deleted member 319809]

Our developers are aware of the problem, so please be patient and expect a fix coming soon.

so you know about the bug already? awesome! but wait... I read some of the other bugs on your tracker and none were related to what I'm having. so maybe you need some details like in those other reports?

[Sorry, the "I'm pretending to be a mind reader just so you can get off the bug tracker" approach won't work in this thread. I'm steering this back into "ask me for details".]

 

[Rydian]

I will cocksmack you so hard you'll have to learn how to right-click again.

 

[Tom Bombadildo]

It's not our problem. Buy a new one. ;O;

 

[Maxternal]

Dear sir/ma'am

Unfortunately, this product's warranty has expired within the last 2 hour(s) since you asked this question and we are unable to continue providing you with service on the matter. Please direct any further correspondence to the seller you purchased you EXTENDED warranty service from (if any).

Again, we thank you for purchasing our product and hope it had provided some degree of enjoyment before this unfortunate situation.

- Customer service.


DO NOT RESPOND TO THIS EMAIL. As this address is only used for sending out impersonal form letters, the inbox is not watched and all received emails are immediately ignored and deleted.


- - -

 

[Xarsah16]

I will cocksmack you so hard you'll have to learn how to right-click again.

well then.

Steering clear of Rydian's path in 3...2...1...

 

[Deleted member 319809]

Dear sir/ma'am

Unfortunately, this product's warranty has expired within the last 2 hour(s) since you asked this question and we are unable to continue providing you with service on the matter. Please direct any further correspondence to the seller you purchased you EXTENDED warranty service from (if any).

Again, we thank you for purchasing our product and hope it had provided some degree of enjoyment before this unfortunate situation.

- Customer service.


DO NOT RESPOND TO THIS EMAIL. As this address is only used for sending out impersonal form letters, the inbox is not watched and all received emails are immediately ignored and deleted.

I have an extended warranty for my computer, ma'am! I bought it myself at Best Buy, the receipt is here: http://tinypic.com/view.php?pic=bxyew&s=4

 

[Xarsah16]

I have an extended warranty for my computer, ma'am! I bought it myself at Best Buy, the receipt is here: http://tinypic.com/view.php?pic=bxyew&s=4

We regret to inform you that your receipt is not valid. It was not printed in blood.

 

[Deleted member 319809]

We regret to inform you that your receipt is not valid. It was not printed in blood.

receipts printed in blood? what is this software, the work of the devil?

 

[Maxternal]

From : [email protected]
To : [email protected]

The address you sent the following email to could not be found:

I have an extended warranty for my computer, ma'am! I bought it myself at Best Buy, the receipt is here: http://tinypic.com/view.php?pic=bxyew&s=4

please check that you have replied to the correct address.

> Our automatic helper service has detected the words "Best Buy" in your misdirected email.
> The following list of suggested destination sites was automatically generated :
> http://www.bestbuy.com/site/Electronics/Customer-Service/pcmcat87800050001.c?id=pcmcat87800050001

 

[Deleted member 319809]

what, I just want this bug fixed! do I really have to contact Best Buy customer service to get you to fix your application?

it won't work! I open it and then I open my file, it displays some error I don't understand (so it's probably not important), then the window disappears!

 

[nukeboy95]

does it display a bug report

Spoiler: "like this"