Ok... I normally don't do topics like this, but no matter how hard I think I can't understand why this happens:
Well, just incase people don't know: I'm nearly 16 year old girl, and I've always been a tomboy. I had to endure years of bullying, literally breaking down in the middle of class, not believing in myself and for that reason not taking opportunities and not even trying because people had made me think I simply wasn't good enough.
Years later, I think I've gotten some kind of outer shell, but even so, I don't act like I'm made out of stone and I always try to treat everyone softly and with respect, while trying to have a laugh when possible.
The problem I have is that people see me as some kind of imposing person, and rather aggressive maybe. The thing is, I don't know why, I'm a very very very patient person (kind of the reason why I suffered for so long), and I always find myself preferring/letting people hurt me before even thinking of hurting them.
I'm very mature and I try to make people laugh, even if it's by doing very stupid or random things, just to see them smile.
I don't know what to do, I get treated differently and it's killing me. It feels like people think that things don't hurt me, even though most have seen me cry or be sad.
Things like: Imagine this girl that doesn't know much about our group of friends, she hugged everyone (people she didn't even know) but when it came to me, we shook hands. Or, girls don't treat me like they treat other girls, the guys do the same, and people hardly ever hug me, . And sometimes, it makes me feel lonely
I'm not making that first situation into a huge deal, but it shows that for me, there's like a second standard or something.
I'm seriously lost. I don't know why I always end up being "the weird one out". Years earlier it was because I was a lot more mature than kids my age, but now... I mean, they've grown up, and it also happens with people out of school too.
Serious advice please?
Amy