GUIDE: HOW TO ACTUALLY GET A GIRLFRIEND (100% REAL, CONFIRMED)
STEP 1:
First of all you need to meet with a guy named aerglass, who knows a guy, who knows another guy that looks like this:
He will give you a ticket with an address. Good luck finding this guy. He is always undercover. Plus good luck finding aerglass too.
STEP 2:
Go to 308 arroyo lane albuquerque new mexico 87104, put that ticket on the door of the house, do 3 backflips and then a usb drive will fall from the sky.
STEP 3:
The USB drive is encrypted using LUKS, use the Linux Mint Live USB. To get the decryption key you have to ask Darnell, he looks something like this, he usually is in Fever Dream Zone but he is everywhere really, hard to find this dude. He can crack the encryption key in seconds. You pay him 2 crystals which is more than worth it.
STEP 4:
When you get the USB drive decrypted you will see a variety of tools, next up you want to run teleport_hack.exe AS ADMINISTRATOR THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT ELSE IT WON'T WORK, MAKE SURE TO SELECT OPTION 1 AND TYPE "63.55600457171854, 93.13870542332327" WITHOUT MAKING ANY MISTAKES OR TYPOS, YOU CANNOT COPY PASTE. MAKE ANY OF THESE MISTAKES AND YOU WILL FUCKING DIE. Wait through a 2 hour long loading screen, don't move or you will get lost in the void.
STEP 5:
When the loading screen is done. DO NOT MOVE. Scream the following numbers "210823, 031023, 070823". Next scream "EXTMODULES=LF_SCR_DBGMENU" You will unlock the scrapped debug menu of life. DO NOT MOVE YET OR YOU WILL LOSE THE PROGRESS AND FALL INTO THE VOID. SCREAM THE FOLLOWING LINES
STEP 6:
You will wake up in Aperture Laboratories, get the Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device in test chamber 2, you next up get the two portal gun in test chamber 11. After you get that you want to scream "REG_BG0CNT=LF_CACHE_DBGMENU_BG". And then scream "CHR_POS=63.55600457171854 93.13870542332327" DO NOT SAY A SINGLE DIGIT WRONG ELSE YOU WILL DIE
You next up want to scream "CHR_GET_GUN=minigun" and then "dbgMenuUpdate()", you will suffer through a 3 hour long loading screen
STEP 7:
You will wake up in a hacker room. Approach the one on the center of the table. Say "CHBBFG" and give them the Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device. They will store it safely. Then they will pull out a fake gun, you want to pull out the massive minigun that was on your inventory, they will give you a computer. Connect the USB drive you got at the start of the guide, execute "DestroyEverything.exe" as administrator, execute "collectAllInfo.exe" as administrator, and execute "lifeHackUnlimited.exe" as administrator. A command prompt window will appear, you just type "this, 2, default", You will see a black hole and you will fucking die.
Congratulations, you unlocked Luigi. but we don't care about that right now, so I want you to scream once again "REG_BG0CNT=LF_CACHE_DBGMENU_BG", scream "CHR_GET=DBGMENUDEVICE", type on the computer "loadAsset(NULL)" and you will crash the entire universe. The universe will shut down for 3 seconds. You will get knocked out
STEP 8:
You will wake up next to a cute, beautiful girl that loves you! Enjoy. Only problem is... You are both on North Korea and you are going to die in 3 days.
Hope you enjoy your girlfriend!
First of all you need to meet with a guy named aerglass, who knows a guy, who knows another guy that looks like this:
He will give you a ticket with an address. Good luck finding this guy. He is always undercover. Plus good luck finding aerglass too.
STEP 2:
Go to 308 arroyo lane albuquerque new mexico 87104, put that ticket on the door of the house, do 3 backflips and then a usb drive will fall from the sky.
STEP 3:
The USB drive is encrypted using LUKS, use the Linux Mint Live USB. To get the decryption key you have to ask Darnell, he looks something like this, he usually is in Fever Dream Zone but he is everywhere really, hard to find this dude. He can crack the encryption key in seconds. You pay him 2 crystals which is more than worth it.
STEP 4:
When you get the USB drive decrypted you will see a variety of tools, next up you want to run teleport_hack.exe AS ADMINISTRATOR THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT ELSE IT WON'T WORK, MAKE SURE TO SELECT OPTION 1 AND TYPE "63.55600457171854, 93.13870542332327" WITHOUT MAKING ANY MISTAKES OR TYPOS, YOU CANNOT COPY PASTE. MAKE ANY OF THESE MISTAKES AND YOU WILL FUCKING DIE. Wait through a 2 hour long loading screen, don't move or you will get lost in the void.
STEP 5:
When the loading screen is done. DO NOT MOVE. Scream the following numbers "210823, 031023, 070823". Next scream "EXTMODULES=LF_SCR_DBGMENU" You will unlock the scrapped debug menu of life. DO NOT MOVE YET OR YOU WILL LOSE THE PROGRESS AND FALL INTO THE VOID. SCREAM THE FOLLOWING LINES
- LF_EXEPCTION_HANDLER=off
- LF_SECURITY=low
- LF_REST_MOVESET=REG_MVFDBG
- LF_DBGMENU=true
STEP 6:
You will wake up in Aperture Laboratories, get the Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device in test chamber 2, you next up get the two portal gun in test chamber 11. After you get that you want to scream "REG_BG0CNT=LF_CACHE_DBGMENU_BG". And then scream "CHR_POS=63.55600457171854 93.13870542332327" DO NOT SAY A SINGLE DIGIT WRONG ELSE YOU WILL DIE
You next up want to scream "CHR_GET_GUN=minigun" and then "dbgMenuUpdate()", you will suffer through a 3 hour long loading screen
STEP 7:
You will wake up in a hacker room. Approach the one on the center of the table. Say "CHBBFG" and give them the Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device. They will store it safely. Then they will pull out a fake gun, you want to pull out the massive minigun that was on your inventory, they will give you a computer. Connect the USB drive you got at the start of the guide, execute "DestroyEverything.exe" as administrator, execute "collectAllInfo.exe" as administrator, and execute "lifeHackUnlimited.exe" as administrator. A command prompt window will appear, you just type "this, 2, default", You will see a black hole and you will fucking die.
Congratulations, you unlocked Luigi. but we don't care about that right now, so I want you to scream once again "REG_BG0CNT=LF_CACHE_DBGMENU_BG", scream "CHR_GET=DBGMENUDEVICE", type on the computer "loadAsset(NULL)" and you will crash the entire universe. The universe will shut down for 3 seconds. You will get knocked out
STEP 8:
You will wake up next to a cute, beautiful girl that loves you! Enjoy. Only problem is... You are both on North Korea and you are going to die in 3 days.
Hope you enjoy your girlfriend!
