Worst Movies Ever Made

[Guild McCommunist]

I should also say War of the Worlds. While not the worst movie ever made, it was vastly overrated. The acting wasn't bad and the special effects were great, but the rest of it was bullcrap. Seriously, everyone is getting gunned down by this pin-point, 110% accurate laser and Tom Cruise over here somehow gains the speed of Eusane fucking Bolt and is able to escape it? And he somehow comes up with all these amazing escapes and goddamn action stunts that fucking Rambo can't even do? Serious bullshit. And it's not even authentic to the book. The book took place in what, early 1900's? 4-stars my ass.

Oh yeah, and there's Fun With Dick and Jane with Jim Carrey in it. Probably the worst comedy I've ever seen. It wasn't funny at all. I half-chuckled maybe once in the movie. The only funny thing in it was making porno names like "Fun With My Dick in Jane" for it.

EDIT: Oh yeah, I forgot pretty much anything made by the Wayans brothers. They should be kept away from cameras. Every movie they make is just not funny. It's hard to explain without saying something racist, if you dig what I mean.

EDIT 2: Also, PETER JACKSON'S KING KONG! It was dumb as shit. Three hours of my life wasted. If I want Peter Jackson to waste any of my time it should have me glued to my TV watching Lord of the Rings. It was terrible. Overly drawn out, and trying to incorporate a fucking love/bestiality fantasy story between Anne and Kong was probably the dumbest thing I've seen in a loooong time. It did have the insect pit, which was omitted from the original, classic, 1933 movie (mainly because of costs and how hard it would be to do in that day and age), but that doesn't save an utter shit ride of a movie. I personally wanted to stab myself in the penis when they had the scene of Kong and Anne ice skating in Central Park.

 

[Cermage]

i havent seen all that many movies. but movies like meet the spartans, date movie are probably the worst i've seen. i just sat through them thinking, what the hell am i watching.

 

[Guild McCommunist]

Poseidon - The remake of The Poseidon Adventure. Dull, lacked any characters that you could sympathise to and had none of what made the original great.

I'd take over 90 points out of 100 for that if it lacked a good "MY LINDA!!!!" wimper/cry. And another 10 points out of 100 if it lacked an awesome theme song like the original.

 

[TrolleyDave]

Poseidon - The remake of The Poseidon Adventure. Dull, lacked any characters that you could sympathise to and had none of what made the original great.

I'd take over 90 points out of 100 for that if it lacked a good "MY LINDA!!!!" wimper/cry. And another 10 points out of 100 if it lacked an awesome theme song like the original.

It lacked both those things.

 

[Edgedancer]

What about Tommy. Worst film I was ever forced to watch.

 

[Densetsu]

The Wicker Man (remake) - If I could punch the people who did this remake I would.

How could I forget this one? Yes, I would punch the (re)makers the same way Nicholas Cage punched the women in this movie!

I imagine a punch from this man would hurt

 

[TrolleyDave]

The Wicker Man (remake) - If I could punch the people who did this remake I would.

How could I forget this one? Yes, I would punch the (re)makers the same way Nicholas Cage punched the women in this movie!

I imagine a punch from this man would hurt

Who me? Naaah, I've never been in a fight in my life honest I haven't. I punch like a girl. (You know, one of them butch prison dykes. heh)

 

[Guild McCommunist]

The Wicker Man (remake) - If I could punch the people who did this remake I would.

How could I forget this one? Yes, I would punch the (re)makers the same way Nicholas Cage punched the women in this movie!

I imagine a punch from this man would hurt

Who me? Naaah, I've never been in a fight in my life honest I haven't. I punch like a girl. (You know, one of them butch prison dykes. heh)

That's what the Russian Special Ops made you think after you killed 100 men with a sandwich. Memory alteration technology has changed a lot from that day in 1954.

Also, I couldn't find a good "MY LINDA!" clip on Youtube. Sorry, I have let you down.

 

[evolance7]

i nearly smash my 40 inch plasma with a wooden chair when i saw the ending of Stephen King's The Mist.

 

[Tsukyndale]

House of the Dead (2004?)
My Rating 1.1/10


Why: Horrible Take on Resident Evil

Umm, you are aware that this is supposed to play like a B-movie, right? >.<

The worst movie I've ever personally seen was probably Cube 2. The original was a nice little story full of existentialism and little background to the characters... Then the producers had to screw it up by trying to milk out the money. >.>

 

[Sefi]

Another horrible recent movie is S.Darko - A Donnie Darko Tale. I loved Donnie Darko, but this "sequel" made me want to hit myself in the head with a hammer. It was made by a different director sure, but holy hell did it suck. They took everything from Donnie Darko and copied it, but made sure to take out anything remotely interesting about anything. And the ending? Hell it doesn't even get a spoiler tag because it's so bad. Anybody can turn back time, you just have to believe!