If you're into discussing hot button race or sex issues you're going to run into words like "bigot, racist, transphobic, etc ..." a lot. I mean, a freaking lot. Most of the time they are being used to control you and make the argument one sided. An example is if you are in a situation where a trans person wants to have sex with you and you decline to do so;
suddenly you're transphobic. Say, you
disagree with the trans movement and you don't want to be a part of it - you're transphobic. I mean, what ever happened to mutual consent or having a personal preference?
I came across
an article by a transgender women who is "sick and tired of seeing people being subject to character assassination because apparently they’re transphobic. In many cases, these people are either absolutely not transphobic, or accusing them of transphobia is a stretch (or somewhere in between)." She said "Whatever your views are on transgender issues, chances are, you’re not transphobic. Real transphobia involves irrational behaviour and denies trans people a ‘fair go’ not at the expense of others. Real transphobia is physically hurting someone because they’re trans, or not hiring the best job candidate just because they’re trans. Transphobia can be real, but fake transphobia is also real, and throwing (or threatening to throw) fake transphobia accusations around, especially in public discourse, does not help the transgender cause."
I have a problem with REAL transphobia. The definition of a phobia includes an extreme aversion to something - not a general aversion. The term is being used out of context and too often. When people hear it they are like "Wait, am I being this?" and if you're asking yourself this question the answer is more than likely "no". People who would physically assault a trans person wouldn't think twice about asking themselves if they are a genuine transphobic person (in which case - they would be).
If I were working at a McDonald's and a trans person walked into the store and I thought to myself "I don't like this persons lifestyle choices so I probably won't like them" and proceeded to smile, ask them what they wanted, took their money and brought them their food I would not be doing anything transphobic. If I were working at a McDonald's and a trans person walked into the store and I thought to myself "I don't like this persons lifestyle choices so I probably won't like them" and proceeded to laugh at them, ask them what they wanted, took their money, short changed them and brought them their food (in which I spat in) I would be transphobic. Do you not see the difference?
The people who are overusing the term transphobic are part of the problem and are doing their cause more harm than anything else. The same can also be said and examples given in other hot button topics with terms like racist or bigot. Chances are too, in these cases, you're not!
When I see people overusing these terms to try to get moderators to shut down opposing opinions, shame you into having sex with them, participating in character assassination, trying to force you to use language only they support or basically get their own way all I see is people throwing hate for the purpose of control. It's my own personal opinion and I shouldn't have to apologize for it nor am I going to and if you fall into this trap of deception and control I'd advise you to take a stand against it.