Bad Jokes Thread

[J-Machine]

Everyone enjoys a good bad joke. A jib so lame you sigh only to laugh at it's terribleness after. Seeing as I have yet to find a place where a gaggle of giggles can be found, I've brought it upon myself to discover this paradise of bad puns and wordplay myself. So without further ado, allow me to break the ice with this grade school gem:

Q: What does a nosey pepper do?

Spoiler

A: It gets jalapeno business!

Now that I've tickled your funny bone temps, tickle our ribs with your own jokes.

 

[Black-Ice]

What do you call a man in-between two buildings?

Ali

huehuehue

 

[J-Machine]

What do you call a man in-between two buildings?

Ali

huehuehue

wow that was bad. lol reminds me off this one.

Q: What do you call a lady with no arms or legs on a bbq grill?

Spoiler

A: Patty

 

[Black-Ice]

wow that was bad. lol reminds me off this one.

Q: What do you call a lady with no arms or legs on a bbq grill?

Spoiler

A: Patty

Gets better....
What do you call a man in-between 2 buildings with 2 sheep?

Alibaba

 

[Tom Bombadildo]

This thread.

 

[Gahars]

We could just save time and compile all of my threads into one.

 

[nukeboy95]

so man walks in to a bar says ouch

 

[J-Machine]

so man walks in to a bar says ouch

dyslexic man walks into a bra. gets slapped

 

[BORTZ]

What do you call a man with no legs and a mohawk?

Spoiler

probably by his name

 

[the_randomizer]

What do you call a man with no arms and legs that was attacked by a cat?

Spoiler

Claude

 

[DinohScene]

My hair is straight.
Unlike me

 

[J-Machine]

Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of a lake?

Spoiler

A: Bob.

 

[Deleted member 318366]

They say flattery will get you nowhere but where does it really get you?

Spoiler

in jail

 

[pokefloote]

Person 2 : "Sea Coral die when they are stressed."
Person 1 : "lol what does a coral even get stressed about?"
Person 2 : "Current events."

 

[Xuphor]

Child: "Dad, is God a woman or a man?"
Dad, not wanting to sound unfair to either gender: "He's both, son."
Child: "Dad, is God black or white?"
Dad, again want to be equally fair to both sides: "He's both, son."

Spoiler

Child: "Dad, is Michael Jackson God?"

 

[J-Machine]

Q: What do vegetarian zombies eat?

Spoiler

A: Graaiiins

 

[Veho]

What do you call a cow with two legs?

Spoiler

Lean beef.

What do you call a cow with no legs?

Spoiler

Ground beef.

 

[NightsOwl]

I think I'll win with this one.

Spoiler

Why did the car stop?

Spoiler

It ran out of gas.

 

[Veho]

[spoken in an Australian accent]

What do you call a deer with no eyes?

Spoiler

No i-dea.

What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs?

Spoiler

Still no idea.

What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs and no dick?

Spoiler

Still no fucking idea.

 

[Gahars]

Can we just post Neil Hamburger sets?