They're gonna kill me, it's over

[x65943]

I ate a man's ice cream bar last year, I can't go into all of the details but they're after me and after me bad. I know this through a series of obscure messages sent to me telepathically outside of the orbit of tralfamadore by harmoniums on Mercury. Long and short of it is they know where I live and even my pet dog Chip the Chihuahua betrayed me. Man's best fuckin friend yeah right. Now I have nowhere to live either because Chip the Chihuahua said I can't stay with him anymore and I have no money. I tried asking my pal Kyle69 for some cash but he said he helped me too many times for instance with money geomancers so here I am totally stuck.

What makes it WORSE every time I make such a thread it gets deleted or I am laughed at because I mix up one detail or another HONEST mistake! Am I expected to remember if my own dog is named Chip the Chihuahua or Nancy the Laberdoodle ??? Seriously guys you need to look at the big pictures.

Anyhow my poor country of Transnistria I need to go to court soon and they are all conspiring against me. My only hope is to flea and jump on Chip's back and feed from his blood and HOPE the cops don't realize I am actually in fact a full adult male human not xenomorph.

I hope no pray no implore no beg no beseech you all please believe me. Because they are coming after me and I am a flea now I will have to use my account less and less but don't worry I'll be back to tell you what Nancy the Laberdoodle's blood tastes like. Please donate below.

Goodbye forever.

 

[Veho]

 

[hippy dave]

I blame Sonic the Hedgehog tbh.

 

[Veho]

This reminds me of that time when the interocitor told me how to build an ice cream machine that would never break, but then McDonalds sent agents to kill me and destroy the prototype.

I got better.

 

[AncientBoi]

OMg. Another lEO
tck

Post automatically merged: Apr 27, 2024

................

 

[SylverReZ]

This reminds me of that time when the interocitor told me how to build an ice cream machine that would never break, but then McDonalds sent agents to kill me and destroy the prototype.

I got better.

He's been developing modchips to fix the ice cream machine problems.

 

[x65943]

OMg. Another lEO
tck

Post automatically merged: Apr 27, 2024

................
View attachment 434189

Can I just say how much I love my profile pic

It's basically perfect

 

[x65943]

tl;dr

I stole a man's ice cream last year, now I'm being chased and betrayed, even by my own dog Chip. Struggling with homelessness and financial woes, I sought help from a friend, but was turned down. Despite my pleas and struggles, my situation worsens as I face impending legal battles and the fear of being discovered as a human, not a walrus.

 

[AncientBoi]

tl;dr

 

[CoolMe]

I swear it's all a big conspiracy, and that's why i've hacked into the most secret government & corporate secrets, the most secret!

What makes it WORSE every time I make such a post it gets deleted

Amen, brother!

 

[AncientBoi]

View attachment 434206

x65943 APEARENTLY DOESN'T KNOW PEOPLE WILL SHITPOST ON EOF. YET HE JUST DID FROM THE START, INSTEAD OF ADDRESSING IT WITH THE PERSON HE IS TRYING TO IMPERSONATE

 

[SylverReZ]

View attachment 434206

 

[CoolMe]

View attachment 434206

It's biassed, as it's should be

 

[Veho]

the fear of being discovered as a human, not a walrus.

It's a thin line.

 

[Flame]

what the fuck did i enter.

 

[x65943]

I am very upset no one is liking and sharing my sad story about my last will and testament

 

[SylverReZ]

I am very upset no one is liking and sharing my sad story about my last will and testament

Put "pls no copy pasterino my story" at the end.

 

[slaphappygamer]

I’m watching you. My uncle works for Nintendo.

 

[Veho]

 

[slaphappygamer]

View attachment 434328