Advice on socializing in college

[campbell00]

I'll be blunt and cut to the chase: I don't drink.

It's not that I see it as immoral or evil, or that I won't hang out with people who drink. It's just that here, at typical college XXXXXX, all social life revolves around it. Back home, my friends and I had interests other than getting drunk and hooking up with random girls. It's not like we got together and discussed Plato either: videogames, food, hanging out, etc. Here, drinking is all anyone does on the weekend.

As a result, I'm rather lonely. And I can't simply go to a party and not drink; things are really strict here, and mostly everyone goes out to bars with their fake IDs, which I don't have or want.

Any suggestions?

 

[Guild McCommunist]

First off, I must give my most sincere kudos to you. Most people around my/presumably your age (I'm 17, I'll guess you're a bit older since you're talking about college) seem to think fun revolves around alcohol and, in the end, shows them having very little depth or true enjoyability. I mean there's a time when it's fun to get a bit tipsy and have fun, but that time is not when you're in your 20's, getting punch drunk.

There's probably a fair amount of people who are, well, nerdy and prefer to play video games than getting slamming drunk. See if there's any clubs or something (not like nightclubs but like school clubs), if they do those. Or if you have any friends that you don't see during college, just keep in contact with them through some online gaming, Skype, whatever, and visit them when you have the chances.

 

[Ritsuki]

If college social life revolves around drinking, colleges in America are really sad

That's maybe because you have to wait to be 21 to drink. In Switzerland, you can buy legally beer, wine, champagne and cider at 16. So drinking starts younger, but also stops younger.

Be the funny guy, try to talk with people (workgroup during science classes, or the bored guy next to you,...)... That's how I managed to make some friends.

 

[dinofan01]

I dont drink either but that doesnt stop me from going to parties. If the parties are that "strict" i suggest find another social circle. Or you could make some friends with common interest that dont party at all. Just hang out at someone dorm really. Theres always something to do you just have to find it and not make excuses.

 

[SmokeFox]

I really dont think that to socialize you have to drink, I'm 25, i have a lot of friends, most of them drinks a lot, but i dont drink, get wasted, or any of these things, and then i never had to drink to pick chicks, so stay far from alcohol.

 

[Issac]

I bet there are more people who'd enjoy other things than drinking, but still goes drinking since "that's what they're supposed to do". try laying out a few hooks and see if anyone catches on doing something else... organize a videogame party... soda, snacks, video games? pizza? non-alcoholic.
put up a few flyers, or hand out... I'm sure there are many who drink though they don't want to.

I'm 23 by the way, like to drink every now and then, but really can't see the fun of getting pissed each and every weekend.

 

[campbell00]

I dont drink either but that doesnt stop me from going to parties. If the parties are that "strict" i suggest find another social circle. Or you could make some friends with common interest that dont party at all. Just hang out at someone dorm really. Theres always something to do you just have to find it and not make excuses.

I know that you're trying to "help", but your comment offends me: I'm not "making excuses": hell, if my choices actually WERE to hang out with friends or to make excuses....

Seriously, NO partying is done on campus. It's that strict here. If I could go to a party and not drink, I WOULD. Unfortunately, the circumstances here are not favorable.

 

[KingVamp]

What College?

 

[Ikki]

Punch an authority.

 

[Sterling]

Be yourself, don't act the fool, and most importantly give people a reason to hang out around you. Whether that be the life of the party, a "let's talk sort of guy", or the all around "Cuddlesome Champeen", it's up to you. It seems Rydian has been working on this title for awhile now. Z.Z Also, I commend you on the less alcohol and more substance attitude. Seriously I like a good drink every now or again, but in mass quantities a person's true identity comes out.

 

[r3gR3t]

Dude, if you don't like drinking, then don't...
Most of my friends from school ''LOVE'' to drink, but that doesn't mean that we don't hang out or that I don't go out with them. When they invite me to drink, I just refuse... I mean, it's not like they're pointing a gun at your head to make you drink, or is it??

 

[r3gR3t]

Be yourself, don't act the fool, and most importantly give people a reason to hang out around you. Whether that be the life of the party, a "let's talk sort of guy", or the all around "Cuddlesome Champeen", it's up to you. It seems Rydian has been working on this title for awhile now. Z.Z Also, I commend you on the less alcohol and more substance attitude. Seriously I like a good drink every now or again, but in mass quantities a person's true identity comes out.

And that too. Me, I'm the ''Brains'' of the group, according to them. They usually ask me for a lot of advice, and that, according to them, I think in a very logical way

 

[campbell00]

Dude, if you don't like drinking, then don't...
Most of my friends from school ''LOVE'' to drink, but that doesn't mean that we don't hang out or that I don't go out with them. When they invite me to drink, I just refuse... I mean, it's not like they're pointing a gun at your head to make you drink, or is it??

Problem is, all of the drinking is going on where all of the social life is. It's no fun hanging out with people when you're the only one NOT drunk.

 

[Arnold Schwarzen]

As of over a year ago I decided to all of a sudden quit and don't drink alcohol anymore. I simply got bored and also wanted to make maximum progress on my body building. I also decided to make some friends who don't do that drinking or partying bull so we could simply hang out and do legit stuff. I'm sure you can find others that feel the same way as you. But anyway yeah party with video games (or whatever) > partying with alcohol.

 

[nando]

every social thing i did back in college included drinking. i never drank, but i still found it fun to socialize with the drunks. quite frankly, some of those people weren't interesting sober.


ps. one drink once in a while isn't gonna kill you and no one will be able to keep track of how much you've drank. just go at your own pace.

 

[bnwchbammer]

Typical college student here to help you...
Maybe.
So I drink. Not necessarily because it's what everyone does, but I like it, it's fun. That being said, if it's not your thing, it's not your thing. I've gone to parties where guys and girls don't drink, or they chill with a cup and take sips (I've done so as well). I'd say go out to a few parties, maybe you'll like it. If not, then make friends in your classes, join a club or something, do what you can to meet people. The more people who know your name, the more people you'll be able to chill with, whether it be in a party situation or a chill, play video games kinda situation.
Nobody will honestly pressure you to drink, even if you're at a party. Just do what you will, be yourself, do everything your college has to offer that pertains to you that could help you meet people.

 

[dark ajax]

Hi bro, I guess you're like myself, I don't like to drink (I don't have any problem with people that do, even my friends) and actually the best part is even if my school is famous in my hometown for having a lot more drinkers than the average college here, there is also a huge student population of geeky/nerdy guys (including myself of course) so that is not a problem, when i was still i college i used to hang out with my friends to just play videogames, sometimes see movies, sometimes do lots of homework and of course having tons of junk food, so i guess is just a matter of getting people with the same tastes (even though i also spent lots of time with my then girlfriend now fiancee, so that also consumes quite a lot of time). Greetings and I hope everything goes great for you...