Aw man that’s just grotty. I know there are people in the world into scat and all sorts, but ewwwwwwww.
What's your experience with dating apps?
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Aw man that’s just grotty. I know there are people in the world into scat and all sorts, but ewwwwwwww.
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I decided to try just by curiosity:
Happn
I tried Happn for 1 month. It's based on people you meet (crossing within 250m radius).
I preferred this app because I see a lot of people everyday and I wanted to see if I ever met people who are looking for someone without me knowing they were. I could engage conversation more easily.
Also, it didn't require a facebook account to register, which I don't have.
Result after 2 month :
I talked to nobody. no match.
the app shows me lot of people I'm sure are not even from my town (russian bots!). scanning GPS apps are probably used to meet and scam the entire world's users.
The very few people I know are from my town (based on pictures), never matched me back, so we can't talk together.
The page description lets you put some pictures, link to your instagram and Spotify account to list your recent activity, but it's not mandatory. You can also manually add music selection without having a spotify account!
The profile description area is size limited and you can't say a lot.
50% bots
10% my town (1 person met IRL randomly after that, I recognized her but we didn't talk)
30% bug or fakes GPS, from other town/countries
10% unknown, random pictures (flower, lake, etc.)
result: I'm still checking it regularly to see if I know someone. I'm keeping it, I never know, maybe I'll get a match or someone I want to meet one day.
Though, app comments on the store are all bad : you need to pay to talk to someone. I don't know, I didn't have a match yet, so I didn't have that problem.
good: seems to work
bad: fake profile, bots, no match suggested unless you pay. Small user base in small town, less chance to really cross someone else.
Edit : after two months, It's just a gallery of met people. not a dating app. I got no crush or mutual matches to meet or talk to anyway.
I keep it few days and I'll decide what to do.
Madly
Apparently it's a new app.
it's based on personal questions and you get a % or match based on other's answers.
Once you find someone you want to talk to, you send a "game" (using credit points yo can buy with real money) to that person and she has to answer some of your own questions to see if she matches your personality and daylife habits.
Didn't require a facebook account to register, but used a facebook's sms system (account kit) for users without one. it's like a hidden facebook account without user's interaction, based on your phone number.
The profile description area is even smaller than Happn.
result after 1 month:
I talked to nobody. no match.
There's nobody in a 100km radius around my town.
The apps is too knew and unknown? not enough users my age (40). most users are 18-30.
100% real profile?
100-200km radius to find some people, not a chance we ever meet.
the concept is nice, questions are from wide range of subjects (every day life, to sport, movies, sex, game, fashion, etc.). too bad you can't see other's answers before having a match nor really have an option to answer all existing questions without launching a game with someone else.
Having the option to answer all existing questions would have a better match making rank.
moving range to 200km, and answering more questions, I find my match is around 10-30% with most people, I really am not likable.
good : no fake profile (apparently); and credits refill automatically with time ! or by watching ads (or paying).
bad : nobody to meet in small towns, questions are 50% nerd and flix and 50% weird. always the same returning questions.
Edit: After 2 month:
No profiles available at all below 100km. useless. no patch, not profile.
Result : I deleted the app.
Tinder
I'm curious about tinder, as that's the most known app.
but I'm feeling it's based on one night stand only, not really meeting people for interesting reason.
I'm also curious to see if people would want to know me, but I suppose lot of users are just saying "yes" to all the profiles, not really caring if they like or not, not even looking at the picture.
So, I'll probably match with someone, but is it really what I want? But I feel like this is the place with most real users, less scam and fake account.
I only hear bad thing about their database and privacy though.
are there any profile and text you can write, or it is only based on pictures?
Do you need facebook to register?
can you re-encounter some users, or it's a one time choice?
And that's all for "free for men" apps?
ah, there's maybe plenty of fish? but it's not really known for non english countries.
OVS (On va sortir) / Meet up
Hey, I also tried the friendly Meet up style sites.
I did 10-15 meetups so far. but my town has really few interesting things to do.
Most suggestions are Hiking, and that's from old people not working anymore, and making meetup in week days.
result after 4 years:
I met few people from my age that way. that's only friendly attempt, and that's what I'm looking for.
I kept in touch with one girl from this site for 2 years now, we now see each others from time to time (cinema, concerts, events, coffee, etc.)
The best thing is that you don't have to ask or match and get rejected.
you just go and meet people IRL ! they can't say no
Problem is : my town is small, the site is not well known, the people's age is high. There's rarely anything to do from september to june but hiking....
most active town is 30-50Km away. I never go that far.
Edit:
Here some additional review
Tinder
I couldn't even register !
It asks either a facebook account, or your phone number.
I wouldn't trust giving my phone number to the company, they have a bad reputation, and I dont want them to sell my number or receive ads.
I don't have a facebook account, and don't plan to.
I tried the in-app Tinder "create account" to make a fake facebook account, and it let's you create one, then asks for mail verification, then it sends you to facebook website which asks for a phone number too ! I stopped there. it was a fake account; with throw-away email, I won't give any more of my time to that app.
Result:
No easy to register method.
Couldn't test it.
OkCupid
Ahhh, at least one app/website which looks legit !
This is what all others should be.
OkCupid is completely free, and you don't need to pay or see ads to contact or talk to someone else.
you can browse other profiles as you want based on your current location (GPS, if you want) or based on any other town and perimeter (up to 200km around it), and ALL the world is available.
the website is also a match ranking based on questions and %, except (unlike Maddly) there are hundeds of different questions with specific life choices, and you both can answer them all, and see all other's answers too !
now the % rank make sense.
The profile's description size is unlimited and even accept links and uploaded pictures.
The site is also the first I see which has soooo much precision about sexuality (straight, monogamous or not, pansexual, demisexual, asexual, etc.) and self definition (whether you feel like a guy, a girl, both, neither, if you want to be called he/she/they, etc.), and of course the search engine takes that in account.
The real big down side is that it's english only, and it automatically limits the number of users in non-english countries.
Same as with all other apps : it's kind of empty in my town....
I start seeing people at 30km (not bad compared to other apps).
result after 1 week
I answered more than 700 questions, which I can compare both in match %, and individually on each profile (which are strangely high, always 70% to 99%). I can even compare the personal comments you can add on each answer to explain your choice.
I still didn't talk to anyone, my town is not very big. But I think this one is the best option to meet someone if you look for a free and serious apps.
I tried to contact someone, who blocked me (I don't blame her, when you see my face that's probably what you want to do right away). Should try different approach next time. maybe before I don't see anyone else (they are all disappearing one by one on the "search near me" page, by dis-matching me I suppose, swipe left, you know)
Good : fully free, no ads, user centered free speech, both apps and website are sync in real time, real and easy worldwide search engine, and good privacy (no phone number or facebook link required).
Bad : english only. might be the only cons I see for now. like all other dating site, there are scam accounts. I didn't had to worry about it (yet).
result after 1 month
Same as all other apps and website I tried : nobody ever talk to me ! (not that it surprises me)
I tried make the first move with 2 people, and got one immediate block/ban, and one ignore.
very few people around my town.
surprisingly, I found a woman who has almost perfect match with me, almost 800 identical, 100 disagree, and 100 unanswered over 1000 questions.
She has the same tastes in almost every subjects (tvshows, anime, etc.)
though, she lives at 2000km ? different country.
I still sent a message just for fun to talk about our exceptional match rate (90%+), but even if I still secretly expected an answer, I knew it'll never reach her, people can just choose to "kick/ban" a profile before reading any sent messages.
Too bad she wasn't in my country, even less near my town.
It seems women in my region are all anti-gaming, anti-series, anti-music, anti-geek.
Though, it might not have change anything, even if in the same town, the message would have not been seen.
What I find really hypocritical is that most women's profile says "send me a message, I can't see likes" and "contact me, I don't bite, promise!" but then never reply.
that's just not respectful and a lie, they want to meet and talk to people but don't allow people to talk.
I guess that's the website feature's fault : before seeing the received message, you have to "like or dislike?" the profile in your notification tab. if you dislike, you don't even know the user sent you a message....
Of course everyone will dislike my profile right away, seeing my face....
Oh, I actually got "someone messaged you" notification, but didn't tell me who. I probably banned her profile without ever knowing who it was cause I never got a message from the one I liked (in the swipe left/right selection).
Edit :
I found someone who matches all my own situation : geek, very shy, like video games, tv series, etc.
only issue is she lives 1000km away from me (700miles?)
I wrote to her, and she replied!
We have lot of common things, but didn't talk much. only once. I might try to talk to her again, and I hope she could maybe ends up as a new friend
Too bad we are not living in the same area, really... I wish I had friends to share my life with, not only on internet.
Comparison Result
So, OkCupid seems to be the current best choice of dating app for the way it's managed. free, lot of people (specially lot of women! more than men), lot of choices for their search engine and most importantly freedom of speech and orientation. people are all very open.
their anti scam system which force the others to also like you to allows you to communicate is a little too harsh, but seems to work well.
its most problematic element is that it's english only, so it's not well known if you live in a non english country.
Happn
I tried Happn for 1 month. It's based on people you meet (crossing within 250m radius).
I preferred this app because I see a lot of people everyday and I wanted to see if I ever met people who are looking for someone without me knowing they were. I could engage conversation more easily.
Also, it didn't require a facebook account to register, which I don't have.
Result after 2 month :
I talked to nobody. no match.
the app shows me lot of people I'm sure are not even from my town (russian bots!). scanning GPS apps are probably used to meet and scam the entire world's users.
The very few people I know are from my town (based on pictures), never matched me back, so we can't talk together.
The page description lets you put some pictures, link to your instagram and Spotify account to list your recent activity, but it's not mandatory. You can also manually add music selection without having a spotify account!
The profile description area is size limited and you can't say a lot.
50% bots
10% my town (1 person met IRL randomly after that, I recognized her but we didn't talk)
30% bug or fakes GPS, from other town/countries
10% unknown, random pictures (flower, lake, etc.)
result: I'm still checking it regularly to see if I know someone. I'm keeping it, I never know, maybe I'll get a match or someone I want to meet one day.
Though, app comments on the store are all bad : you need to pay to talk to someone. I don't know, I didn't have a match yet, so I didn't have that problem.
good: seems to work
bad: fake profile, bots, no match suggested unless you pay. Small user base in small town, less chance to really cross someone else.
Edit : after two months, It's just a gallery of met people. not a dating app. I got no crush or mutual matches to meet or talk to anyway.
I keep it few days and I'll decide what to do.
Madly
Apparently it's a new app.
it's based on personal questions and you get a % or match based on other's answers.
Once you find someone you want to talk to, you send a "game" (using credit points yo can buy with real money) to that person and she has to answer some of your own questions to see if she matches your personality and daylife habits.
Didn't require a facebook account to register, but used a facebook's sms system (account kit) for users without one. it's like a hidden facebook account without user's interaction, based on your phone number.
The profile description area is even smaller than Happn.
result after 1 month:
I talked to nobody. no match.
There's nobody in a 100km radius around my town.
The apps is too knew and unknown? not enough users my age (40). most users are 18-30.
100% real profile?
100-200km radius to find some people, not a chance we ever meet.
the concept is nice, questions are from wide range of subjects (every day life, to sport, movies, sex, game, fashion, etc.). too bad you can't see other's answers before having a match nor really have an option to answer all existing questions without launching a game with someone else.
Having the option to answer all existing questions would have a better match making rank.
moving range to 200km, and answering more questions, I find my match is around 10-30% with most people, I really am not likable.
good : no fake profile (apparently); and credits refill automatically with time ! or by watching ads (or paying).
bad : nobody to meet in small towns, questions are 50% nerd and flix and 50% weird. always the same returning questions.
Edit: After 2 month:
No profiles available at all below 100km. useless. no patch, not profile.
Result : I deleted the app.
Tinder
I'm curious about tinder, as that's the most known app.
but I'm feeling it's based on one night stand only, not really meeting people for interesting reason.
I'm also curious to see if people would want to know me, but I suppose lot of users are just saying "yes" to all the profiles, not really caring if they like or not, not even looking at the picture.
So, I'll probably match with someone, but is it really what I want? But I feel like this is the place with most real users, less scam and fake account.
I only hear bad thing about their database and privacy though.
are there any profile and text you can write, or it is only based on pictures?
Do you need facebook to register?
can you re-encounter some users, or it's a one time choice?
And that's all for "free for men" apps?
ah, there's maybe plenty of fish? but it's not really known for non english countries.
OVS (On va sortir) / Meet up
Hey, I also tried the friendly Meet up style sites.
I did 10-15 meetups so far. but my town has really few interesting things to do.
Most suggestions are Hiking, and that's from old people not working anymore, and making meetup in week days.
result after 4 years:
I met few people from my age that way. that's only friendly attempt, and that's what I'm looking for.
I kept in touch with one girl from this site for 2 years now, we now see each others from time to time (cinema, concerts, events, coffee, etc.)
The best thing is that you don't have to ask or match and get rejected.
you just go and meet people IRL ! they can't say no
Problem is : my town is small, the site is not well known, the people's age is high. There's rarely anything to do from september to june but hiking....
most active town is 30-50Km away. I never go that far.
Edit:
Here some additional review
Tinder
I couldn't even register !
It asks either a facebook account, or your phone number.
I wouldn't trust giving my phone number to the company, they have a bad reputation, and I dont want them to sell my number or receive ads.
I don't have a facebook account, and don't plan to.
I tried the in-app Tinder "create account" to make a fake facebook account, and it let's you create one, then asks for mail verification, then it sends you to facebook website which asks for a phone number too ! I stopped there. it was a fake account; with throw-away email, I won't give any more of my time to that app.
Result:
No easy to register method.
Couldn't test it.
OkCupid
Ahhh, at least one app/website which looks legit !
This is what all others should be.
OkCupid is completely free, and you don't need to pay or see ads to contact or talk to someone else.
you can browse other profiles as you want based on your current location (GPS, if you want) or based on any other town and perimeter (up to 200km around it), and ALL the world is available.
the website is also a match ranking based on questions and %, except (unlike Maddly) there are hundeds of different questions with specific life choices, and you both can answer them all, and see all other's answers too !
now the % rank make sense.
The profile's description size is unlimited and even accept links and uploaded pictures.
The site is also the first I see which has soooo much precision about sexuality (straight, monogamous or not, pansexual, demisexual, asexual, etc.) and self definition (whether you feel like a guy, a girl, both, neither, if you want to be called he/she/they, etc.), and of course the search engine takes that in account.
The real big down side is that it's english only, and it automatically limits the number of users in non-english countries.
Same as with all other apps : it's kind of empty in my town....
I start seeing people at 30km (not bad compared to other apps).
result after 1 week
I answered more than 700 questions, which I can compare both in match %, and individually on each profile (which are strangely high, always 70% to 99%). I can even compare the personal comments you can add on each answer to explain your choice.
I still didn't talk to anyone, my town is not very big. But I think this one is the best option to meet someone if you look for a free and serious apps.
I tried to contact someone, who blocked me (I don't blame her, when you see my face that's probably what you want to do right away). Should try different approach next time. maybe before I don't see anyone else (they are all disappearing one by one on the "search near me" page, by dis-matching me I suppose, swipe left, you know)
Good : fully free, no ads, user centered free speech, both apps and website are sync in real time, real and easy worldwide search engine, and good privacy (no phone number or facebook link required).
Bad : english only. might be the only cons I see for now. like all other dating site, there are scam accounts. I didn't had to worry about it (yet).
result after 1 month
Same as all other apps and website I tried : nobody ever talk to me ! (not that it surprises me)
I tried make the first move with 2 people, and got one immediate block/ban, and one ignore.
very few people around my town.
surprisingly, I found a woman who has almost perfect match with me, almost 800 identical, 100 disagree, and 100 unanswered over 1000 questions.
She has the same tastes in almost every subjects (tvshows, anime, etc.)
though, she lives at 2000km ? different country.
I still sent a message just for fun to talk about our exceptional match rate (90%+), but even if I still secretly expected an answer, I knew it'll never reach her, people can just choose to "kick/ban" a profile before reading any sent messages.
Too bad she wasn't in my country, even less near my town.
It seems women in my region are all anti-gaming, anti-series, anti-music, anti-geek.
Though, it might not have change anything, even if in the same town, the message would have not been seen.
What I find really hypocritical is that most women's profile says "send me a message, I can't see likes" and "contact me, I don't bite, promise!" but then never reply.
that's just not respectful and a lie, they want to meet and talk to people but don't allow people to talk.
I guess that's the website feature's fault : before seeing the received message, you have to "like or dislike?" the profile in your notification tab. if you dislike, you don't even know the user sent you a message....
Of course everyone will dislike my profile right away, seeing my face....
Oh, I actually got "someone messaged you" notification, but didn't tell me who. I probably banned her profile without ever knowing who it was cause I never got a message from the one I liked (in the swipe left/right selection).
Edit :
I found someone who matches all my own situation : geek, very shy, like video games, tv series, etc.
only issue is she lives 1000km away from me (700miles?)
I wrote to her, and she replied!
We have lot of common things, but didn't talk much. only once. I might try to talk to her again, and I hope she could maybe ends up as a new friend
Too bad we are not living in the same area, really... I wish I had friends to share my life with, not only on internet.
Comparison Result
So, OkCupid seems to be the current best choice of dating app for the way it's managed. free, lot of people (specially lot of women! more than men), lot of choices for their search engine and most importantly freedom of speech and orientation. people are all very open.
their anti scam system which force the others to also like you to allows you to communicate is a little too harsh, but seems to work well.
its most problematic element is that it's english only, so it's not well known if you live in a non english country.
Last edited by Cyan,
My problem is that I'm into bdsm, and the average Belgian (fleming) woman is retarded prishy (it's as if nuns do the education). So my experiences with okcupid were just a confirmation than anything controversial.
There weren't that many profiles from my region. Spent perhaps half an afternoon browsing all of them, and even with only that and the region as criteria, I came up at none. And by comparison : there were a handful of women in the Netherlands. So they exist, but also out of the region (I already had a girlfriend from the Netherlands... Finding a girlfriend closer to home was the reason I tried it).
Oh and... As far as bdsm goes, you can split Erm roughly into two groups. Those who see it as a cute serial extra spice, and those who really need it. I'm unfortunately in that second group.
I could date girls who aren't into it (or see it as an extra), but it would work out as well as a gay person dating the other sex:not at all.
The plus side to this situation is that I had no excuse to hide behind my pc. I just scoured all gatherings and meetings there were in the regio (still not much), and found a girlfriend that way.
There weren't that many profiles from my region. Spent perhaps half an afternoon browsing all of them, and even with only that and the region as criteria, I came up at none. And by comparison : there were a handful of women in the Netherlands. So they exist, but also out of the region (I already had a girlfriend from the Netherlands... Finding a girlfriend closer to home was the reason I tried it).
Oh and... As far as bdsm goes, you can split Erm roughly into two groups. Those who see it as a cute serial extra spice, and those who really need it. I'm unfortunately in that second group.
I could date girls who aren't into it (or see it as an extra), but it would work out as well as a gay person dating the other sex:not at all.
The plus side to this situation is that I had no excuse to hide behind my pc. I just scoured all gatherings and meetings there were in the regio (still not much), and found a girlfriend that way.
Curious.
Back when it was dating sites and not hook up apps (which I will again remind people the social commentators of the time decided would never work for straight people) they would look at the failures such things had in Europe where they were roaring successes in the US and find that there were too few people in Europe by virtue of the language and travel barriers. You see similar things where the likes of Amazon and Ebay have failed to penetrate as deeply into the non English markets.
I wonder then if you have particular needs that there are effectively too few people in general. I am hesitant to go with social norms - I don't know Belgium, or indeed the Dutch speaking regions, as well as some places but it seems to be about as religiously unaffiliated as the other non Catholic countries, teen pregnancies are lower than a lot of places but far from absent, laws regarding porn are pretty lax as far as these things go, at the same time marriage ages are quite high (some say 27 for first)... none of which speak to a puritanical streak. More anecdotally then none of the times I knocked about in Belgium or with Belgians did I note anything there, though that would probably be more the nature of anecdotes -- most of that would have been bikers or rock/metal and inhibitions are generally noted as being lower among that set. Similarly as a favourite song once said "I can't be tied down with a girl that wants me tied up" so I was not exactly looking there, and if communication is key there then the last thing I need to do it flub my Dutch.
Back when it was dating sites and not hook up apps (which I will again remind people the social commentators of the time decided would never work for straight people) they would look at the failures such things had in Europe where they were roaring successes in the US and find that there were too few people in Europe by virtue of the language and travel barriers. You see similar things where the likes of Amazon and Ebay have failed to penetrate as deeply into the non English markets.
I wonder then if you have particular needs that there are effectively too few people in general. I am hesitant to go with social norms - I don't know Belgium, or indeed the Dutch speaking regions, as well as some places but it seems to be about as religiously unaffiliated as the other non Catholic countries, teen pregnancies are lower than a lot of places but far from absent, laws regarding porn are pretty lax as far as these things go, at the same time marriage ages are quite high (some say 27 for first)... none of which speak to a puritanical streak. More anecdotally then none of the times I knocked about in Belgium or with Belgians did I note anything there, though that would probably be more the nature of anecdotes -- most of that would have been bikers or rock/metal and inhibitions are generally noted as being lower among that set. Similarly as a favourite song once said "I can't be tied down with a girl that wants me tied up" so I was not exactly looking there, and if communication is key there then the last thing I need to do it flub my Dutch.
I used one before got one response that said she was a big fat cow and needed to be milked scared me from using anymore dating apps think it was pof.
If you are indeed 38 then are you telling us in the entire time you have been around and presumably doing bars, clubs, festivals and whatnot that you have never had a worse experience than that? I would typically expect to have a more traumatising event in line to go into somewhere.
That's true, I meet some of them and it was scary as hell. Unfortunately dating apps attract many weird people. But there are some advantages in such applications too. Personally, I found some mates there for hookups. I don't really believe that dating apps like Tinder or other will give a meaningful relationship but I don't search it now. Taking into the account that I am not really going out at the moment, I receive from dating app all that I need, a little communication and sex dates. So, if you want the same I suggest you at least to try.
Last edited by StuartV,
ever since I lost my virginity (with 35) it made me realize the whole hullaballoo around sex and that I was overthinking it too much and it took a lot of burden off of me when it finally happened.
As virgin I was on the verge of trying one of these apps, installed one but never used it.
Had a profile on a mail-order bride site but you had to pay to see what the woman wrote, which I never did.
And no it wasn't about money it's just that nowadays it's hard if you're very shy.
It's silly but women have much more interest in me now, I guess confidence is the main attraction for women not your profile pic or how funny your bio is. But I don't care, don't make the pursuit of men/women or pleasure your main goal.
As virgin I was on the verge of trying one of these apps, installed one but never used it.
Had a profile on a mail-order bride site but you had to pay to see what the woman wrote, which I never did.
And no it wasn't about money it's just that nowadays it's hard if you're very shy.
It's silly but women have much more interest in me now, I guess confidence is the main attraction for women not your profile pic or how funny your bio is. But I don't care, don't make the pursuit of men/women or pleasure your main goal.
Previously, I didn't believe in dating sites. And I thought that finding a normal girl is simply unrealistic. It all depends on both partners and their common goals.
Where's the multidimensional dating app for meeting different reality versions of yourself? That's what I want.
3 years later follow-up, even actual dating apps just ended up with mostly guys who saw me as a fetish, so I stopped using them. Shortly after I stopped using them, I reconnected with an old friend and she's my wife now.
I am the GUY WITH VAN. i tried but no one ever hooked in
Last edited by leon315,
I'm not registered on any of dating site. However, if I decide to, I'll go on some of new hook up websites. Tinder is the most known, but I believe it's not the best. I consider visiting first gay hookup site is better then Tinder. Many friends of mine don't succeed there or were scammed. There are plenty of other dating services nowadays, so I would try sth new.
Last edited by BobCh,
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