Empathizing too much with someone doesn’t create empathetic kids, it creates narcissistic kids with the focus mostly on them. Disciplining them makes them think about their actions towards other people. And tells them hurting others is bad.
Overall who’s more likely to be stricter and the kid to be more afraid of when they do bad, the Father or Mother?
Yes, but also partly wrong imho - because mass shooters may be narcissistic, but first and foremost they are social outcast loners, who were refused to matter at all in their social cicles. This then turns into grief and anger. If you discipline them on top of that, guess what...
So instead of bringing the narcissism down, how about preventing the other side?
Also disciplining children is something that may be needed for them to think about action/reaction of their behavior, but disciplining - never produces empathy for the victim.
(Show me that study.)
Look at the result of what boarding schools produced as human material. conscienceless, self centered alphas, that have learned only one thing in life, and that is - that to go forward, they have to beat everything and every one in their way - in a very real sense.
Reason. Punishment first and foremost produces anger. Anger then gets channeled by those institutions into action in a competitive environment, winner gets rewarded, then very quickly the only thing you are reproducing are sadists, and broken people.
To produce empathy, you actually need social learning experiences. So mixed schools, engagement, people recognizing, that different characters can bring in a different valueset. Thats how you produce leaders.
The running joke is, that boarding schools usually are where the dentists son meets the lawyers daughter - but thats about all.
If you want to do your child a favor, dont just discipline them, teach them how to be a liberal thinker and interact with different sets of people. Even if he/she later might end up at Yale, that will benefit them more, than what discipline might have given them.
Usually a parent thats quite into the discipline game, isnt bright enough to really gage different social interactions. Their mindset usually centers around "in public smile more, and be more polite.. "
That said, dont let your child end up as a narcissistic brat either. Please..
And yes, some mass shooters might be narcissistic, some might not, what they all have in common though... is not first and foremost a lacking sense of values... Thats not what makes you develop the rage.
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Psionic Roshambo:
like a 250 dollar kit back when DDR4 was Intel only