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[Note-This was 1st written on my Facebook and I don't feel like reformatting it for GBAtemp forums nor do I find it necessary so yeah keep it in mind]
It's called "The Moon is in Your Reach". I don't no if I wil be using this storyline for a written story or a game, but here's how I imagine the intro.
Note-The whole story (if written) will not be 1st person, just the intro
You know I never knew of the world outside my own. I never even knew that others worlds even existed. It wasn't until that faithful day when I realized there is much more to the world then....This one world. I'm not even sure if I fully understand what's going on or whether I am what Max says I am.......But maybe this was all predestined....That one day....
I still remember it.....I had ran away from my foster home after dealing with my roommates. They treat me like dirt. I never had anyone treat me with respect....Well except for Max and Nadia...But I had just left the home...
"I can't stand those idiots," I thought, "And that stupid quote unquote caretaker always sticks up for them even if he know they're wrong. I don't need them. I've survived this long without anyone.....I'll go to the slums and see Max."
I don't even remember how I meet Max. Even though he takes care of me and makes sure I don't get hurt all I know of him is he lives in the slums and always wears a black worn down cloak. He usually ask me odd questions when I talk to him, but my soul always resonates with him.
"Max! You here," I screamed down the alleyway.
"Why wouldn't I be Jin," Max said as he slowly came out from the shadows, "More trouble from those worms?"
"Who else......I punch one of them dead in the face. They should no not to tease me.....I've beaten up everyone in there at least once. They even tried to gang up on me."
"A warrior I see......A warrior shrouded in shadows."
"....What are you talking about?"
"Have you ever thought of getting revenge.....On all those you don't respect you and treat you like you never existed?"
"......."
All I could do was sit in think.....I did want revenge on those losers. They all treat me like I'm not even there and when they do acknowledge my existence they treat me like I should be there.
"Jin....Your destiny will come to the light soon enough and all those who opposed you will come to bow down at your feet...," Max said as he smirked and turned and walked off.
I decided to walk the streets for a little while as it wasn't dark yet and I didn't have to be back at that horrid home til later. I had no where to go really.....Just like my house mates at the home no one really acknowledged my existence. Besides Max there was only one person who actually knew I was there....
"JIN!!! Please stop," Screamed Nadia as she ran toward me pushing herself through the crowd.
"Nadia what are you doing here?"
"Jin please come home," Nadia pleaed
"Why should I.....All they do is mess with me. I hate those bastards and If I ever get the chance I'd make sure they'd never see the light of day!"
"You don't mean that."
"Yes I do....Nadia you don't understand. Everyone loves you. Your the most popular girl at the home.....You get hit on like everyday."
"But do you notice I never go with any of them.....I'm saving myself for someone special..."
".....Who might that be?"
"None of your business.....Look Jin....Just come home...With me. I promise I'll be by your side so you'll never feel lonely."
It was something about Nadia that made me feel like I actually made a difference. I still remember the 1st day we met and she was the only one who made me feel like I belonged there.
"Alright Nadia....You win..I'll come...." I said as I was interrupted by a screamed.
"JIN!!!! LOOK!!" screamed Nadia as she pointed into the sky.
There was a hole in the sky that was sucking everything into it. The people, the ground, the buildings....Everything. Then before I knew it Nadia and I were being sucked in.
"JIN!!! HELP!!! I can't hold on....." Nadia yelled as she held on to a well rooted traffic light.
The force of this hole was so strong. For some strange reason I wasn't being pulled in. I tried to help Nadia.
"Grab my hand...." I said as I held my hand out to Nadia
She tried to reach over to me and I almost had her......but..but...I lost her. She was sucked into the hole.
"NADIA!!! No...What's going on..No....I won't let her go like this,"
I remember this part clear as this is when my destiny truly began. I jumped into the hole with no regards of my own safety........And there I was sitting in some unknown place trying to find the strength to stand, but I fainted......hmph....What can I say? The rest is history.
.
.
(This ends the 1st person and would start the next chapter. This is actually a secret convo between some very important people)
.
.
"Is it done?"
"Of course but we lost Jin."
"He jumped in the hole to find his little girlfriend...hahaha...Little does he know it will be much harder than that."
"Indeed....Go find her and bring her back to me.....Jin might need a little persuasion if he thinks we had something to do with this."
"Yes sire....What to do with the collected energy."
"Put it with the other dimensional orbs......Our plan is almost a reality...Then everyone will pay for not accepting us....."
So how'd you like my story. Please tell me how you like it. Give me any pointers and tell me if this little treat makes you want to find out more.....
It's called "The Moon is in Your Reach". I don't no if I wil be using this storyline for a written story or a game, but here's how I imagine the intro.
Note-The whole story (if written) will not be 1st person, just the intro
You know I never knew of the world outside my own. I never even knew that others worlds even existed. It wasn't until that faithful day when I realized there is much more to the world then....This one world. I'm not even sure if I fully understand what's going on or whether I am what Max says I am.......But maybe this was all predestined....That one day....
I still remember it.....I had ran away from my foster home after dealing with my roommates. They treat me like dirt. I never had anyone treat me with respect....Well except for Max and Nadia...But I had just left the home...
"I can't stand those idiots," I thought, "And that stupid quote unquote caretaker always sticks up for them even if he know they're wrong. I don't need them. I've survived this long without anyone.....I'll go to the slums and see Max."
I don't even remember how I meet Max. Even though he takes care of me and makes sure I don't get hurt all I know of him is he lives in the slums and always wears a black worn down cloak. He usually ask me odd questions when I talk to him, but my soul always resonates with him.
"Max! You here," I screamed down the alleyway.
"Why wouldn't I be Jin," Max said as he slowly came out from the shadows, "More trouble from those worms?"
"Who else......I punch one of them dead in the face. They should no not to tease me.....I've beaten up everyone in there at least once. They even tried to gang up on me."
"A warrior I see......A warrior shrouded in shadows."
"....What are you talking about?"
"Have you ever thought of getting revenge.....On all those you don't respect you and treat you like you never existed?"
"......."
All I could do was sit in think.....I did want revenge on those losers. They all treat me like I'm not even there and when they do acknowledge my existence they treat me like I should be there.
"Jin....Your destiny will come to the light soon enough and all those who opposed you will come to bow down at your feet...," Max said as he smirked and turned and walked off.
I decided to walk the streets for a little while as it wasn't dark yet and I didn't have to be back at that horrid home til later. I had no where to go really.....Just like my house mates at the home no one really acknowledged my existence. Besides Max there was only one person who actually knew I was there....
"JIN!!! Please stop," Screamed Nadia as she ran toward me pushing herself through the crowd.
"Nadia what are you doing here?"
"Jin please come home," Nadia pleaed
"Why should I.....All they do is mess with me. I hate those bastards and If I ever get the chance I'd make sure they'd never see the light of day!"
"You don't mean that."
"Yes I do....Nadia you don't understand. Everyone loves you. Your the most popular girl at the home.....You get hit on like everyday."
"But do you notice I never go with any of them.....I'm saving myself for someone special..."
".....Who might that be?"
"None of your business.....Look Jin....Just come home...With me. I promise I'll be by your side so you'll never feel lonely."
It was something about Nadia that made me feel like I actually made a difference. I still remember the 1st day we met and she was the only one who made me feel like I belonged there.
"Alright Nadia....You win..I'll come...." I said as I was interrupted by a screamed.
"JIN!!!! LOOK!!" screamed Nadia as she pointed into the sky.
There was a hole in the sky that was sucking everything into it. The people, the ground, the buildings....Everything. Then before I knew it Nadia and I were being sucked in.
"JIN!!! HELP!!! I can't hold on....." Nadia yelled as she held on to a well rooted traffic light.
The force of this hole was so strong. For some strange reason I wasn't being pulled in. I tried to help Nadia.
"Grab my hand...." I said as I held my hand out to Nadia
She tried to reach over to me and I almost had her......but..but...I lost her. She was sucked into the hole.
"NADIA!!! No...What's going on..No....I won't let her go like this,"
I remember this part clear as this is when my destiny truly began. I jumped into the hole with no regards of my own safety........And there I was sitting in some unknown place trying to find the strength to stand, but I fainted......hmph....What can I say? The rest is history.
.
.
(This ends the 1st person and would start the next chapter. This is actually a secret convo between some very important people)
.
.
"Is it done?"
"Of course but we lost Jin."
"He jumped in the hole to find his little girlfriend...hahaha...Little does he know it will be much harder than that."
"Indeed....Go find her and bring her back to me.....Jin might need a little persuasion if he thinks we had something to do with this."
"Yes sire....What to do with the collected energy."
"Put it with the other dimensional orbs......Our plan is almost a reality...Then everyone will pay for not accepting us....."
So how'd you like my story. Please tell me how you like it. Give me any pointers and tell me if this little treat makes you want to find out more.....
