How do I get an Eyepatch?

Discussion in 'General Off-Topic Chat' started by Ducky, Nov 23, 2011.

Nov 23, 2011

How do I get an Eyepatch? by Ducky at 4:33 PM (763 Views / 0 Likes) 10 replies

  1. Ducky
    OP

    Member Ducky QUACKJECTION!

    Joined:
    Oct 13, 2007
    Messages:
    1,086
    Location:
    Duckling Land!
    Country:
    Israel
    Well you see.. We have a yearbook photo shooting in our school soon.
    And I really wanted to think of a funny way to take this photo and to have it that way for the rest of my life.

    I enjoy a good sense of humor, so I thought about it and I really want to have an eyepatch when I take that picture.
    That way i'll be known forever as the "Pirate guy!" and i'd have a really funny story about it.
    However, I NEVER LIE.

    How do I get a legal health-eyepatch for curing reasons? I'm NOT GOING TO LIE just for that. I don't like lying. I prefer hurting my eye somehow so that I will have to go with an eyepatch for 24 hours and take that picture.

    The question is for What reasons people need to wear an eyepatch, and how do I get one by doing Minimal-damage to myself?


    P.S.
    This is a serious question. I'm not a masochist or anything, I just really want to take that photo.



    Thanks in advance!
    :)
     
  2. shango46

    Member shango46 GBAtemp Regular

    Joined:
    Jul 18, 2010
    Messages:
    192
    Location:
    Edmonton, Alberta Canada
    Country:
    Canada
    Well, pink eye is always a quick way. Try going to the bathroom and getting feces on your hand. Then rub your eye with the feces hand and you will have pink eye in no time.
     
  3. ByteMunch

    Member ByteMunch GBAtemp Fan

    Joined:
    Jan 2, 2010
    Messages:
    444
    Country:
    United Kingdom
    Ahaha, you crazy dude. I had a friend who wore a patch, but he lost his entire eye...
     
  4. DarkStriker

    Member DarkStriker GBAtemp's Kpop lover!

    Joined:
    Mar 15, 2009
    Messages:
    1,957
    Location:
    NIKU!
    Country:
    Norway
    Ask if i can have a eyepatch? Or buy one? PIRATES!
     
  5. xist

    Member xist ΚΑΤΑ ΤΟΝ ΔΑΙΜΟΝΑ ΕΑΥΤΟΥ

    Joined:
    Jul 14, 2008
    Messages:
    5,861
    Country:
    United Kingdom
    The simplest way to do this is to pretend your optical prescription has changed and you're getting double vision and splitting headaches with both eyes open. If one of your eyes has a different correction required than the other it can cause all sorts of problems for you...of course this would require lying.

    As far as damage to your eye that would require patching, aside from evisceration, or a chronic corneal defect there's not a lot of call for patches. Develop a squint? Although for that you'd be pretty much faking the condition i describe above.
     
  6. Hells Malice

    Member Hells Malice Are you a bully?

    Joined:
    Apr 9, 2009
    Messages:
    5,652
    Country:
    Canada
    No offense...but you're a moron.
    Anyway

    1: Buy one. They're not hard to find really.
    2: I like Shango's idea. Rub some shit in your eye. Sounds about as intelligent as this general idea.
     
    3 people like this.
  7. prowler

    Member prowler Sony

    Joined:
    Jul 14, 2009
    Messages:
    9,473
    Location:
    Ragol
    Country:
    United Kingdom
    That's funny, you don't want to lie so you're going to hurt yourself which could lead to permanent damage in your eye.

    Just say you're wearing it for photo day, no big.
     
    2 people like this.
  8. Ducky
    OP

    Member Ducky QUACKJECTION!

    Joined:
    Oct 13, 2007
    Messages:
    1,086
    Location:
    Duckling Land!
    Country:
    Israel
    Okay you got me convinced. It does sound really stupid putting it that way :P

    :D You made me laugh



    Oh and thanks for all the answers, i'd go with either saying the truth and hoping that my teacher will allow that or just say that I got hurt and I need that for curing reasons. Thats lying but they won't bother on calling the photoshoot guy twice so they'll probably allow that.
     
  9. Blood Fetish

    Member Blood Fetish Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?

    Joined:
    Nov 3, 2002
    Messages:
    980
    Country:
    United States
    Doubtful. No one really cares about high school except for high schoolers. Once people graduate they move on in a hurry.
     
    3 people like this.
  10. Xuphor

    Banned Xuphor I have lied to all of you. I am deeply sorry.

    Joined:
    Jul 14, 2007
    Messages:
    1,681
    Location:
    USA
    Country:
    United States
    Fork + eyeball, stabbing motion. A very very fast and easy way to do it, but you need high pain tolerance.

    For real though, you can buy an eyepatch in any pharmacy (or pharmacy stores like CVS), for like $5 or less.
    Dead serious, can't you just buy one without telling your parents, hide it, then put it on after your parents leave you at school and before any teachers see you? Just tell them it's due to [insert any eye condition], it's not like they are going to tell you to pull it up to check. And if they do, just say you need to keep it down for sterality concerns.
     
    1 person likes this.
  11. yuyuyup

    Member yuyuyup GBAtemp Psycho!

    Joined:
    Apr 30, 2006
    Messages:
    3,303
    Location:
    USA MTN timezone
    Country:
    United States

Share This Page