MARIO IS A COMMUNIST UPRISING SIMULATOR
PEACH IS THE MUSHROOM KINGDOMS DICTATOR
BOWSER IS AMERICA
AMERICA KIDNAPS THE DICTATOR TO TORTURE HER AND PREVENT THE SPREAD OF COMMUNISIM
MARIO IS A COMMUNIST HERO WHO SINGLE HANDEDLY TAKES DOWN AMERICA AND SPREADS COMMUNISIM
TOADS ARE SHORT FROM MALNUTRITION AS THE KINGDOM IS SMALL AND VERY POPULATED
KOOPAS ARE TURTLES BECAUSE THEIR SHELL IS BULLETPROOF AMERICAN ARMOUR
BOWSER IS THROWN INTO LAVA BECAUSE THATS THE ONLY WAY MARIO CAN POSSIBLY PUNCTURE HIS ARMOUR
THE MUSHROOMS MARIO EATS TO BECOME SUPER MARIO ARE ACTUALLY IRL A SHROOM THAT CAUSES HALLUCENATIONS SO MARIO IS ONLY HALLUCINATING ABOUT BEING SUPER
LUIGI IS ONLY TALL AND NOT MALNURISHED BECAUSE HE IS THE DICTATORS PARTNER
HAMMER BROS ARE ACTUALLY AMERICAN SOLDIERS TRAINED IN GORILLA WARFARE
THE FLAG IS ACTUALLY THE JAPANESE FLAG AND THE WHITE DOTS THAT MAKE IT LOOK LIKE A SKULL ARE ACTUALLY THE LIGHT SHINING ON THE FLAG
DUE TO JAPAN LACKING MEANS TO PROTECT THEMSELVES FROM THE SUDDEN UPRISING AMERICA HAS TO COME IN AND HELP
MARIO WEARS COMMUNIST COLORS
AND SOME OF THE DEVELOPERS FOR THE ORIGIONAL GAME WERE JAPANESE COMMUNISTS
AFTER THE GAME FAILED TO CAUSE A COMMUNIST UPRISING IN JAPAN THE MASSIVE PROFITS THAT THE GAME BROUGHT IN CAUSED THE COMMUNIST DEVELOPERS TO CHANGE TO CAPITALISI AND CREATE ONE OF THE MOST PROFITABLE SERIES AROUND
MARIO IS A COMMUNIST UPRISING SIMULATOR WHERE YOU FIGHT FOR COMMUNISIM