Urgent!

[Reaper]

I showed my faulty Windows 2000 computer to my longtime friend and he said it 'freezes' a lot? I had tried putting it on the stove but I experience no performance enhancements. Do I need to order a special computer heater? Thanks for your help, guys.

 

[redact]

what's that you say?
fail?

when they said "failure is your only option" they didn't mean it like that

 

[chuckstudios]

What you need to do is stick something over the exhaust fans. That way heat will accumulate inside the case and it won't freeze anymore.

 

[Hehe Moo]

I found that when I peed on mine, it stopped freezing. But the smell that came with the pee was also removable by laying a turd on it.

 

[Vulpes Abnocto]

I found that when I peed on mine, it stopped freezing. But the smell that came with the pee was also removable by laying a turd on it.

Bad Moo! Don't encourage this!

*beats Moo mercilessly*

...


....oh....crap...sorry about that.
I had a Black & White flashback.

 

[Reaper]

Now it won't even boot up

I was thinking of buying a $12 laptop from a Chinese company called Good Luck Stuff
So I will go to a ghetto to pick it up.

 

[Veho]

You need a USB heater to prevent freezing.

 

[xcalibur]

You need a USB heater to prevent freezing.

Don't listen to him!
USB heaters are innefficient. Use a USB bonfire instead.

 

[science]

You need a USB heater to prevent freezing.

Don't listen to him!
USB heaters are innefficient. Use a USB bonfire instead.

 

[Mewgia]

You need a USB heater to prevent freezing.

Don't listen to him!
USB heaters are innefficient. Use a USB bonfire instead.

Or a real bonfire.

I recommend jumping into the fire after you put your computer in it to make sure it has stopped freezing. This checking procedure takes about 20 minutes, though.