Best and worst biscuits.

FAST6191

Techromancer
OP
Editorial Team
Joined
Nov 21, 2005
Messages
36,798
Trophies
3
XP
28,375
Country
United Kingdom
gbachef-png.3459

Furthering the GBAchef agenda we have a discussion of biscuits, specifically your most liked and your most disliked. Anecdotes and things like "I like boxes of broken biscuits" (by the way if you are ever in the UK buy a box of them or the chocolate equivalent if you want the general UK biscuit experience) are very welcome.

We do also take the position that Jaffa Cakes are indeed cakes as the makers claim ( http://www.jaffa-cakes.com/jaffa-cakes-biscuits-name for a somewhat interesting legal case on the matter) and thus are also excluded from this. It physically pains us but we might also have to exclude godliness that is Tunnocks from this. Depending upon the final ruling of the GBAchef council this may see my membership being revoked for going there.
Marshmallow driven biscuits are a tough call -- standard pink and whites count (though I can not see them taking top or bottom place) but Jam Mallows less so.
Finally if it was not already obvious we are using the English definition of biscuit and as such American style cookies are excluded, there are some fine ones (I recently had some very nice bunch of oatmeal and white chocolate ones made by a visiting USian relative) but that is not what this is about.

Best.... seen as I removed tunnocks I have a few options.
Ginger crinkle crunch -- I really like normal ginger biscuits but tried these on a whim one day and it turns out small chunks of dried ginger in your biscuit is an awesome thing.
Hob nobs. With there always being a danger of eating two packs in a single sitting it means they have to be on there. Chocolate or not means nothing here.
Malted milk. Second only to chocolate cake in the list of things I like to soak in milk and then eat. I can take or leave chocolate covered/sided ones though primarily as they interfere with soaking up milk and the chocolate is too thin to lend enough structural support to them if you allow them a long enough soak to become saturated*.

*the advanced technique of chocolate side outwards to create a cantilever* beam** but have the newly soft biscuit exist within the low/zero displacement zone or the cretin class of "use a spoon" are not enough to dismiss this fault.

*treating instead as a singly fixed point item with self weight providing the tensile force just ends up with milk everywhere. The chocolate usually does OK here as well but the turning makes it a cantilever beam thus this part of the physics can be ignored.

**why yes I consider the physics of biscuit eating at this level. If this concerns/offends/perplexes you be advised to never take me to an all you can eat restaurant.

Worst
Party rings.... I hate them and always have; I find the taste, consistency and feel on your fingers to be horrible. Sadly most parties (birthday, general, new year's eve) I ever went to featured them and as such are what I will blame for my general apathy concerning parties to this day. That they also do not dunk well in milk is just fuel to the fire.
Rich tea. I do not hate them, I just do not see why they still make them/place them in such a vaunted position.

Middle of the road
Arrowroot biscuits. Invariably something I get to bring across in my luggage and have to explain to US customs but though they are perfectly edible I am not sure what the big deal is.

Pink wafers. Only mentioned as I tried several in the US and they were less than stellar where the European versions seem to be quite nice. I fear this may be similar to arrowroot biscuits above though.
 

Depravo

KALSARIKÄNNIT
Former Staff
Joined
Oct 13, 2008
Messages
5,359
Trophies
2
Location
Purgatory
XP
4,149
Country
United Kingdom
You hit the nail on the head with Hob-Nobs. The milk chocolate variety have a moreishness rivalled only by heroin.

Worst? Rich Tea. They're crap.
 

ShadowSoldier

Well-Known Member
Member
Joined
Oct 8, 2009
Messages
9,382
Trophies
0
XP
3,878
Country
Canada
*american and confused*

Biscuits to EU is sort of like cookies here in North America, but they're not full of sugar, and they're to have as a side snack for say drinking tea or something. You can actually find them at house partys and such.

Biscuits here in North America are normally the dough type things.
 

pwsincd

Garage Flower
Developer
Joined
Dec 4, 2011
Messages
3,686
Trophies
2
Location
Manchester UK
XP
4,467
rich tea are a bit lame , but dunked in tea 'til just before they fall is always good.
Choccie Digestives ... only the mcvities ones again dunkin in yer brew till the chocolate melts ..
Custard creams are what my kids go nuts for..

This thread is reminding me of the peter kaye standup .. with hobnobs being the marines of buscuits .. can be dunked for ever...

 

xist

ΚΑΤΑ ΤΟΝ ΔΑΙΜΟΝΑ ΕΑΥΤΟΥ
Member
Joined
Jul 14, 2008
Messages
5,859
Trophies
0
XP
984
Country
What do Snowballs count as? They're not really biscuits or cakes...at least they don't seem like cakes. And man, Party Rings are embedded into my childhood...don't diss the Ring!
 

pyromaniac123

ส็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็(ಠ益ಠส็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็
Member
Joined
Sep 24, 2011
Messages
2,006
Trophies
2
XP
1,770
Country
What do Snowballs count as? They're not really biscuits or cakes...at least they don't seem like cakes. And man, Party Rings are embedded into my childhood...don't diss the Ring!

Confectionery.

Favourite biscuit has to be a garibaldi.
 

FAST6191

Techromancer
OP
Editorial Team
Joined
Nov 21, 2005
Messages
36,798
Trophies
3
XP
28,375
Country
United Kingdom
...no spongecake biscuits or jaffa cakes?

I find this article lacking and hardly digestable. :angry:

Jaffa cakes are cakes -- the company even went to court to defend that stance and I even linked the case in the OP- http://www.jaffa-cakes.com/jaffa-cakes-biscuits-name .

Also how I overlooked squashed fly biscuits I will never know, doubly so as I usually get them at the same time as I get fig rolls (about the only time I care for figs).

On party rings -- this would usually be a matter of "challenge accepted sir" but I am not sure how to set about it in this case. Bake off?
 

xist

ΚΑΤΑ ΤΟΝ ΔΑΙΜΟΝΑ ΕΑΥΤΟΥ
Member
Joined
Jul 14, 2008
Messages
5,859
Trophies
0
XP
984
Country
On party rings -- this would usually be a matter of "challenge accepted sir" but I am not sure how to set about it in this case. Bake off?

I believe standard practice for any Party Ring related disputes is miniature hoopla with Cadbury's Fingers as the targets (another more-ish snack!)

Although i do concede Party Rings are not a biscuit that should be eaten with any regularity, but stand as something different once in a while.
 

Site & Scene News

Popular threads in this forum

General chit-chat
Help Users
  • Psionic Roshambo @ Psionic Roshambo:
    Analog stick nipples
  • BigOnYa @ BigOnYa:
    Yea i have couple other sites I find Switch titles also and just looked, I don't see it out/leaked yet...(paper mario)
  • Quincy @ Quincy:
    Or even worse; circle pad ball fondlers like on the 3DS
    +1
  • Psionic Roshambo @ Psionic Roshambo:
    I just want a Pokemon Hell Raiser fan game 😭
  • K3Nv2 @ K3Nv2:
    Anyone wanna play with my joydock
  • BigOnYa @ BigOnYa:
    Biomutant looks cool tho, may have to try that
  • Quincy @ Quincy:
    Usually when such a big title leaks the Temp will be the first to report about it (going off of historical reports here, Pokemon SV being the latest one I can recall seeing pop up here)
  • K3Nv2 @ K3Nv2:
    I still like how a freaking mp3 file hacks webos all that security defeated by text yet again
  • BigOnYa @ BigOnYa:
    They have simulators for everything nowdays, cray cray. How about a sim that shows you playing the Switch.
  • K3Nv2 @ K3Nv2:
    That's called yuzu
    +1
  • BigOnYa @ BigOnYa:
    I want a 120hz 4k tv but crazy how more expensive the 120hz over the 60hz are. Or even more crazy is the price of 8k's.
  • K3Nv2 @ K3Nv2:
    No real point since movies are 30fps
  • BigOnYa @ BigOnYa:
    Not a big movie buff, more of a gamer tbh. And Series X is 120hz 8k ready, but yea only 120hz 4k games out right now, but thinking of in the future.
  • K3Nv2 @ K3Nv2:
    Mostly why you never see TV manufacturers going post 60hz
  • BigOnYa @ BigOnYa:
    I only watch tv when i goto bed, it puts me to sleep, and I have a nas drive filled w my fav shows so i can watch them in order, commercial free. I usually watch Married w Children, or South Park
  • K3Nv2 @ K3Nv2:
    Stremio ruined my need for nas
  • BigOnYa @ BigOnYa:
    I stream from Nas to firestick, one on every tv, and use Kodi. I'm happy w it, plays everything. (I pirate/torrent shows/movies on pc, and put on nas)
  • K3Nv2 @ K3Nv2:
    Kodi repost are still pretty popular
  • BigOnYa @ BigOnYa:
    What the hell is Kodi reposts? what do you mean, or "Wut?" -xdqwerty
  • K3Nv2 @ K3Nv2:
    Google them basically web crawlers to movie sites
  • BigOnYa @ BigOnYa:
    oh you mean the 3rd party apps on Kodi, yea i know what you mean, yea there are still a few cool ones, in fact watched the new planet of the apes movie other night w wifey thru one, was good pic surprisingly, not a cam
  • BigOnYa @ BigOnYa:
    Damn, only $2.06 and free shipping. Gotta cost more for them to ship than $2.06
  • BigOnYa @ BigOnYa:
    I got my Dad a firestick for Xmas and showed him those 3rd party sites on Kodi, he loves it, all he watches anymore. He said he has got 3 letters from AT&T already about pirating, but he says f them, let them shut my internet off (He wants out of his AT&T contract anyways)
    BigOnYa @ BigOnYa: I got my Dad a firestick for Xmas and showed him those 3rd party sites on Kodi, he loves it, all...