thaddius' Console Roast 2014 Edition - Round 12

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Worst Handheld of the Eighth Generation

  • The Nintendo 3DS

    Votes: 19 3.4%
  • The Sony Playstation Vita

    Votes: 80 14.4%
  • The Nvidia Shield

    Votes: 170 30.5%
  • The Neo Geo X

    Votes: 288 51.7%

  • Total voters
    557
  • Poll closed .
This is another instance of understanding portability as "I can put it in my pocket". Fair play, that's one way to do things, I personally prefer a comfortable grip. That being said, the Shield could use a slimming diet.

True, it is too thick to fit in pants pocket (I can fit it in my hoodie pockets, but that's totally different). That's my main and probably only complaint about my Shield, if I want to bring it somewhere I have to use my hands or my bag. It's also got a bit of weight to it, it weighs around 20oz, but it's got an entire handheld with a huge battery stuffed inside so I didn't expect some light as a feather thing.
 
True, it is too thick to fit in pants pocket (I can fit it in my hoodie pockets, but that's totally different). That's my main and probably only complaint about my Shield, if I want to bring it somewhere I have to use my hands or my bag. It's also got a bit of weight to it, it weighs around 20oz, but it's got an entire handheld with a huge battery stuffed inside so I didn't expect some light as a feather thing.
Doesn't it also have rumble? I always wanted handhelds to start including that, even if it'd drain the battery faster when turned on - it's just nice to have some haptic feedback when gaming.
 
wut.

It's almost literally a 360 controller with a screen thrown on the top

Which is exactly the issue. There's a reason that the Gameboy wasn't "literally a NES controller with a screen thrown on top" or the DS wasn't "literally an N64 Controller with a screen thrown on top" - it's a ridiculous way of doing things!

The Shield pretty much takes the worst parts of laptop computing, combines it with the most irritating parts of mobile gaming, and wraps it up in the most hideous packaging ever seen for a portable device!
 
Which is exactly the issue. There's a reason that the Gameboy wasn't "literally a NES controller with a screen thrown on top" or the DS wasn't "literally an N64 Controller with a screen thrown on top" - it's a ridiculous way of doing things!

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And that's just the Micro, the original Game Boy is much, much bigger than that.
 
In case you haven't figured it out I'm just joking. I own a few flash carts though so GB backwards compatibility it not a problem for me.
 
I think we can all agree that the Game Boy Micro is the best Game Boy ever.


i love my GBA SP!! i bet i can fit in the palm of my hand. but back on topic...

i'm not going vote this time. both systems i have tried are good in each way and i like them. i have not tried the shield system and neo geo x and hell i don't know what the shield system is...
 
I guess we have a different understanding of "on top"...?
I used that photo for comedic effect since it's the Famicom Controller edition, the original Game Boy (big grey beast) was essentially a NES controller with a screen on-top. ;)
 
I used that photo for comedic effect since it's the Famicom Controller edition, the original Game Boy (big grey beast) was essentially a NES controller with a screen on-top. ;)

No it wasn't. If I recall correctly it was thinner, and it was certainly chunkier. Ok I'll accept that it's probably a lot closer to being just "a controller with a screen stuck on top" than the rest, but even so it was the first real attempt. Since then devices have been moving further and further away from the design.
 
No it wasn't. If I recall correctly it was thinner, and it was certainly chunkier. Ok I'll accept that it's probably a lot closer to being just "a controller with a screen stuck on top" than the rest, but even so it was the first real attempt. Since then devices have been moving further and further away from the design.
Okay, fair game, so here's a thought - the Shield is foldable, it's a clamshell design like a DS. Is the entire DS like just a screen and speakers stuck to an NES controller? No, of course not, you can fold it perfectly fine, it's a clamshell, just close the lid. Well, the shield is the same, except instead of an NES controller on the bottom you have the far superior 360 controller with some minor details changed around. Same thing, same form factor, different dimensions.
 
I voted for the NeoGeo X because it's just really not that great... Sure you can install third party firmware on it and gain more emulators and ironically even better NeoGeo emulation but it was more expensive than my cheap ass JXD S7800b and is far less capable. The controller hook up is cool so it has that going for it.

Was close to voting for the shield but the NeoGeo X beats it. Shield is almost over powered for anything "right now" and by that I mean by the time software requires that level of hardware on Android you will be able to do the same thing on something costing much less. (I am waiting to see what Shield 2 is going to be like. Should be interesting at least.)

The Vita is still better than either of those two but probably worse than the 3DS when it comes to the library of games on the two machines. Throw in memory cards that are too expensive and it would get my vote between it and the 3DS. (but just barely, its probably the best non Nintendo handheld I have seen since the TurboExpress! Much better than the PSP in my opinion.)

3DS would get my vote for weakest hardware except I suspect it is probably more powerful than the NeoGeo X. The 3D thing while cool is very dependent on the game being played so it gets a "meh" from me.

I went cheap this gen, got one of the cheap china android machines and couldn't be happier. I plan on getting what ever JXD puts out as a replacement for the 7800 as long as they keep the same form factor they can keep me as a customer. :) (Big beefy hands love the big beefy handheld lol)
 
The Shield costs $199 as of today and it would seem that this price point isn't going to change because NVidia noticed a spike of interest in the device after the price was lowered, I don't think that budget devices will be able to match that hardware with a superior price point anytime soon and even if they will, they'll still require an additional input method (with a few exceptions like the Chinese gaming tablets, but those are usually poor quality gadgets), making the Shield the superior choice either way. I hated on the Shield big time when it came out, but that's because they charged an arm and a leg for it and getting a phone and an external controller was just more cost-effective. Now that it's affordable it's a perfectly viable Android solution, definitely superior to something you'd immediately cover with fingerprints or something underpowered. Hell, I see it as better than the OUYA which is admittedly far cheaper but it's a "home micro console" and that disqualifies it in terms of portability which is what you want from mobile-grade games (then again, it's not a huge achievement to be better than the OUYA... ;O; ).
 
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