So this one chick IMed me to talk about Nintendo and stuff.

Rydian

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(2:43:06 PM) stingadolph: Ur a cutie... message me back
(2:43:41 PM) Rydian: THE BLOOD OF THE UNBELIEVERS SHALL CLEANSE THE BACON THAT WAS FORETOLD IN THAT ISSUE OF NINTENDO POWER A FEW YEARS AGO
(2:43:59 PM) stingadolph: Hi there!!...Glad you decided to chat today=)...
(2:44:36 PM) Rydian: THE SQUEALING PIGGY GOODNESS SHALL NOT BE WITHHELD BY THE SYSTEM
(2:44:59 PM) stingadolph: im feeling horny 2day so dont't be a stranger...hehe
(2:47:56 PM) Rydian: WILD BOARS WITH HORNS ARE UNKEMPT AND UNFIT FOR RENDERING INTO THE HOLY GOODNESS ONLY FARM RAISED SWINE ARE WORTHY SO SAYS THE GODDESS NES
(2:48:30 PM) stingadolph: Cool... k so, my name is Carly i am originally from Orlando Can I ask you a question?
(2:49:07 PM) Rydian: ALL SHALL BE REVEALED IN TIME ALSO ON THE THIRD PAGE OF YOUR NES INSTRUCTION BOOKLET IF YOU WIPE OFF THE BBQ SPATTERS
(2:49:25 PM) stingadolph: Do you like a girl who loves to workout??? I love wearing sexy gym clothes ;p!!! Do u wanna see my pic Because I luv showing off my body :P
(2:51:09 PM) Rydian: ADMIRING SWINE BEFORE THE RENDERING INTO DELICIOUS HOLY BACON IS LIKE BETA TESTING AND MASTURBATION AS IN RELEASE IMMINENT BUT NOT AS GOOD AS IT COULD BE
(2:58:52 PM) Rydian: YOU SEEM TO HAVE NOT RESPONDED YET I HOPE THAT YOU DID NOT DRINK THE NINTENDAIDE TOO SOON IT IS NOT YET TIME FOR THE VALVENING
(2:59:13 PM) stingadolph: I know thats a rhetorical question :) Let me slip into something sexy for u... I have to keep something to the imaginiation at first...
(3:05:11 PM) Rydian: I SEE YOU ARE VERSED IN THE ART OF NINTENDOMINATION AS WITHOUT IMAGINATION THE WII U WOULD NOT HAVE GOOD GRAPHICS SO YOUR VIEWS ARE CONGRUENT TO THE NEEDS OF NINTENCULT I APPROVE OF THIS
(3:09:01 PM) Rydian: YOUR LATE REPLY AROUSES SUSPICIOUS IN YOUR GRORIOUS LEADER IT DOES NOT TAKE THAT LONG TO DON THE BACONSUIT OF CONSUMMATE HUMPING
(3:11:35 PM) Rydian: SERIOUSLY NOW DID YOU JUST GET A LEG STUCK IN THE COSTUME OR SOMETHING I CAN SEND SOMEBODY TO HELP YOU AS THE RITUAL MUST NOT BE DELAYED ANY FURTHER





I think I left a good impression. I might get laid at this rate!
 

Gahars

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"I am the Alpha and the Omegle."

bloodninja: Ok baby, we got to hurry, I don't know how long I can keep it ready for you.

j_gurli3: thats ok. ok i'm a japanese schoolgirl, what r u.

bloodninja: A Rhinocerus. Well, hung like one, thats for sure.

j_gurli3: haha, ok lets go.

j_gurli3: i put my hand through ur hair, and kiss u on the neck.

bloodninja: I stomp the ground, and snort, to alert you that you are in my breeding territory.

j_gurli3: haha, ok, u know that turns me on.

j_gurli3: i start unbuttoning ur shirt.

bloodninja: Rhinoceruses don't wear shirts.

j_gurli3: No, ur not really a Rhinocerus silly, it's just part of the game.

bloodninja: Rhinoceruses don't play games. They f*cking charge your ass.

j_gurli3: stop, cmon be serious.

bloodninja: It doesn't get any more serious than a Rhinocerus about to charge your ass.

bloodninja: I stomp my feet, the dust stirs around my tough skinned feet.

j_gurli3: thats it.

bloodninja: Nostrils flaring, I lower my head. My horn, like some phallic symbol of my potent virility, is the last thing you see as skulls collide and mine remains the victor. You are now a bloody red ragdoll suspended in the air on my mighty horn.

bloodninja: Goddam am I hard now.
 

ShadowSoldier

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I still don't know why you were telling me that shit Rydian. I wanted to get something in a little more sexy for you, and you just kept spouting nonsense.

Dick.
 
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I think Rydian is what we call a "Virginity Knight"
protect_yourself.jpg
 

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