Last Seen Movie

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Who killed captain Alex? (2010)
220px-Who_Killed_Captain_Alex.jpg


I got ripped off because i still don't know who killed captain Alex!
Can someone please tell me who killed the captain Alex!?

It's one of those movies that are so bad that they are good, this movie was made with budget of around 200$ ( no i am not joking) and most of budget was spend on a shitty bar fight scene were they break some plastic tables.

It's officially free on YouTube so go watch it:
 
Lake Placid (1999)

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0139414/

That has to be the most 90s film I have ever seen.

I saw a trailer/advert for it on either TV or a VCR around the time, for some reason always associate it with Rancid Aluminum.

Anyway went in cold having only the memory of said advert two decades ago and mostly the name had only stuck.

Mash up of fish out water rom-com, stoner comedy (though no drugs) and scary big creature in the [insert set piece of choice]. Somehow also rated R in the US (Netherlands said 12, UK 15 and most other places 15 or less so people reckon it was a couple of pedestrian gore shots). Also starring some pretty heavy hitting actors for the time.
It is not good. I could however not stop watching it from a "what the fuck is going on here?" perspective.
Don't watch it for a film to have fun, can't suggest it as a bad film that is still fun either. If however you are a fan of film making or script writing then I am going to suggest it just as something truly bizarre. So much so I don't know if I want to properly spoil it here.
The first IMDB review linked on the main page for it reckons it is a parody, as do several others, but I don't see it, not even some kind of deconstruction. Piranha 3D might be a parody or at least deconstruction or super self aware, cabin in the woods same. This is not that unless it is one of those late 90s "we're too cool to do that" type films which I did not see either. You could possibly edit it to be one.
Some might wonder if it was studio interference but R rated and only a single writer.

Mind you I said the film was the most 90s thing I ever saw but then I looked up the trailer for it

That is now the most 90s thing I ever saw.

Apparently there are a whole bunch of TV sequels as well between 2007 and 2018, including a crossover with the anaconda series (if you want a cheesy big monster film then the ones of those I saw were amusing enough) in Lake Placid vs. Anaconda.
 
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Seems "stay in your house, citizen" has seen me take film watching back up. I think I have watched more films this last week or three than I have in years.

In this case rewatched Smokin Aces for the first time in many many years.
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0475394/

When I first saw it years ago I did not like it at all -- had a setup I could get behind (whole bunch of assassins go in to take out a guy but twists all over the place, almost to the point of being a con film) but fell flat for me. Today though actually yeah it is not bad, looks nice enough, has some nice set pieces/action scenes, some reasonable pacing, some people given some measure of characterisation, plot enough to keep me engaged. I don't know if that is a condemnation of the state of cheesy films today or some kind of changed taste, though I fear it is the former.

Director apparently also did The A-Team and The Grey, the latter of which I also saw a few weeks back and did not mind where the former did OK for me as well. Did an episode of the Blacklist that was one of the more memorable ones for me. Cinematographer also did some stuff I like (was one for Training Day), though clearly has some kind of style.

Speaking of scenes and styles was the torture scene in the meet the players segment a homage to something else or the inspiration for the one in Django Unchained?

Was a sequel that I remember seeing once as well, though not much about it so that probably says most of what I need to know there.

If this is your sort of film then I do recommend 2010's Operation: Endgame which so few people seem to have seen. Not the best thing in the world but I did really enjoy that. Indeed I would suggest that over rewatching this.

Correction: This is the most 90's thing you've ever saw. Consider yourself lucky.
breakdancing tutorial
Certainly amusing but I am not sure that is peak 90s.

Also I forgot last time when listing amusing stuff with Dinosaurs to list Cadillacs and Dinosaurs. Apparently it is semi officially (was officially but company buyout saw it migrate after a fashion) available for free on youtube so
one playlist
If we are doing peak 90s then that has claim to be a peak 90s cartoon, at least of its style.
 
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Made it to 3 films in 1 day

1) https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0365830/
Rewatched Tenacious D and the pick of destiny.
Not bad but I can definitely see why it did "meh" numbers. Fictional origin story of the band Tenacious D. Far better stoner* films out there (the musical sequences are probably the only thing that really saves it), and indeed I would probably suggest watching their earlier shows for HBO I think it was.

*they tell me it is a stoner film (indeed starting with a parody of the THX ear burster that starts many cinema experiences but instead being THC) and it kind of has the setup of one but I am still not sure I believe it is one.

2) https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0119081/
Event Horizon
Further to ruin any credibility I have when I saw I like cheesy sci fi films I have never seen it before.
Probably the classic example of should have been at least a TV miniseries, and possibly studio interference.
Still for all the shit this gets it is actually a reasonable horror film in space with some nice sets, good characters and the like. As ever I could go science boy and pick things apart (why the rescue ship was not able to compartmentalise to save oxygen I don't know, why people strip off what look like reasonably flexible space suits I don't know (nor why they don't stay in them), artificial gravity might be a nice handwave for film purposes but that is actually a serious thing). I will note though I have not seen some of the later series of the expanse (have read the books though) so I don't know how they handle it as the earlier stuff there raised the bar for near future-non FTL space shows for me.

3) https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0106639/
Cyborg 2 Glass Shadow. Don't think I saw the first film (though it is scarcely related, it mainly being a Jean Claude Van Damme vehicle) and haven't seen the third either. There are apparently sequels to cyborg made by the director of the first that are unrelated to the subsequent film series, and I definitely have not seen them either.
Near future the environment has gone to shit and "cyborgs" (though probably closer to androids as barring one character they don't seem to be humans retrofitted, and their programming and human like nature is referenced extensively) are common enough (think blade runner).
Rather dull in terms of script, characterisation and a very odd plot/writing (a lot of things appearing almost out of nowhere) but had some nice/amusing performances (barring the fight scenes) and some OK worldbuilding and sets.
Classic man falls in love with cyborg assassin and they attempt to run away from corporate overlords who rule the dystopia.
Can't really suggest it though, even for fans of 80s/early 90s cheese. I could almost see it being cut into something and dubbed over at points to make it work but it would be a lot of effort.
 
Made it to 3 films in 1 day

1) https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0365830/
Rewatched Tenacious D and the pick of destiny..

Ha, a friend once made me watch that with him.
Kind of an oddball of a film. But slightly amusing.


Last watched: Millenium Actress

Story told in hindsight, with interviewer "visiting an old favorite of his", which then retells:
Code:
A girl chasing a guy she interacted with once, becoming an actress just for the sake of it.
Glorious animation/timelapse, kind of trippy at times.
- Actually based on some real japanese actress apparantly-
Amazing Legendary composer aswell.
You should probably watch it.
 
Last edited by Deleted member 514389,
Hmm seems the German speaking world might be responsible for the lame film posters we have today


Anyway

Q: The Winged Serpent (1982)
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0084556/
Seen as I brought up the subject of film posters then Boris Vallejo (if you have ever seen a half naked barbarian lady in a painting then if not him then probably someone ripping him off) did this one apparently
q_1982.jpg


What is not to love here? While technically 80s you would be forgiven for thinking 70s, though some reckon it also serves as a pretty decent homage to 50s creature films. Quasi exploitation film starring one David Carradine as hard boiled 70s New York detective on the case of both a stop motion monster and someone doing human sacrifices.
Of its time? Absolutely, though I have seen films that aspire to be more than that be even cheesier.
Did I have a fantastic time throughout it all? Most certainly.

Question for those around in 80s new york... would that lady, basically single income waitress, really have been able to afford a flat that nice? I know it would be unthinkable today but still.
 
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Angel Eyes
20081988.jpg


Review: Autism turned into a movie.

My dad was browsing Netflix and saw the trailer of this piece of shit. He probably thought that this would be an action movie a la Bone Collector but nope... at the end of this piece of shit we looked at each other and said at the same time:
giphy.gif

 
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