My complicated life rn

A part of me wants to ask that girl out, but is afraid of taking risks in this unusual day and age.

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Yeah, I for one would recommend against that; who knows what she could actually be like, y'know? She could just be using you, and when she's had enough she could easily fabricate an accusation of abuse or assault (physical or sexual) - and people will believe such lies simply because it's a woman accusing a man. It's part of the reason why groups and movements like MGTOW exist, along with the other injustices boys and men face in education, in the workplace, in courts and the justice system, homelessness, suicide rates...

As for the other points...unfortunately, I don't exactly have anything to say on those topics. I don't know how good or bad Illinois is (apart from "it's in America and they use stinky old illogical Imperial units and put months in front of days; what a bunch of silly billies", which...well, isn't exactly helpful!), but moving out of your family's home would be emotionally painful and hard to adjust to at first, I'd imagine (haven't done so myself, yet). Do so when you feel ready, have somewhere to go, and make sure you keep in touch so the shift isn't too overwhelming.

Selling off stuff? We've got a ton of old cables and stuff we keep saying we'll sort through "soon", but never actually do. When you do actually go through your stuff, put them into piles based on how badly you'll miss them if you got rid of them - "not at all", "slightly", "quite a bit, but I can go without if I must", and "definitely", for example.

I don't freaking know; just writing what I'm thinking, really.

I appreciate the advice on organizing the boxes of cables and less valuable/seldomly used accessories, but I do want to say one thing regarding the first paragraph.

I'm not saying that those issues don't exist, because they do happen, and unfortunately, everyone would rather throw a pity party in society today as opposed to holding true to principles, values, and the entire idea of what America used to be. But as far as I can tell, a lot of the MGTOW/TRP movement seems to be a lot of divorcees and situations where there's three sides to the stories, and to get to the most important side - the truth - is difficult in a post-modern and consequently post truth world. After all, who needs the truth when you can have your truth? They can have their truth? And I'm not talking about trivial stuff like whether one prefers Coke or Pepsi. I'm talking people deciding whether human life is of inherent value, or if one can just decide against the wishes of others their fate, a debate one can see unfold in the pro-life vs. pro choice arguments that, if I had to speak my honest and unfiltered mind on, I think a lot of the people arguing for the latter just don't want to be forced to take responsibility for bad choices, both on the woman and the man's part.

I know there's more to it than that, what with the economic impact a single mother brings upon themselves in a pro-life vs. pro-choice kind of legal system, but the point being, you could say that the abortion industry uses baby parts and contributes to be used in who knows what, with evidence to prove such an argument that isn't fabricated and that's presented honestly, and you'd just be branded as fake news.

And if I'm to go with a girl nowadays, it's gonna be with a chaperone that will stand up for me in the event things go to shit, and frankly, the kind of girl I'd be going for would be a tad bit more traditional than I think someone might expect a nerd/geek like myself to go for nowadays.

Even then, those kinds of women always end up wanting kids sometime down the road, and I already know that I probably wouldn't be the best father, and even if I was confident, who wants to give birth to a kid in a world where people are more cold to each other than ever? Otherwise, why else would to see everyone with true wireless earbuds in, tuning others out? Or see people resort to casting their opposition as every one of the worst labels in the book to the point of diminishing the currency of said labels? Not to mention the rise in selfishness and unhappiness as a whole in a lot of countries in this post-modern age.

I know, it sounds like I shouldn't even consider dating, and I know it sounds foolishly naive to say, but I want to believe that somewhere or out there is the one, as corny as that sounds! XD

I do hope so, too, but after everything that's happened in the last decade...? I fully agree with your second-to-last paragraph; it's becoming increasingly easy to just not care about anyone but yourself, to dehumanise everyone else.
We may be living close together, in apartments and flats, but socially and culturally we're far more distant than ever before. Making friends as an adult is incredibly difficult for introverts like myself, and keeping friendships from my schooldays is also more challenging than it ever was too. And that's just friendships, never mind a goddamn romance with the opposite sex.

Sometimes, it feels like advances in technology has only cursed us. We may now be able to communicate with others from different nations practically instantly, but what about the people living right next door? We can get news about a natural disaster from the other Hemisphere and massively raise awareness of it, but the same also applies for rumours and fearmongering and scams and conspiracies and cults.

Will we ever be able to bring back the sense of closeness we once had, before the rise of the Internet and the tech boom? Right now, I highly doubt it.


Not to mention the corruption third-wave feminism has wrought. If that sexist, infantile, hypocritical "movement" was to disappear tomorrow, the scars would remain for years, I feel. People would still tend to believe women's claims over men, and minimise and ignore male suffering, for a long time to come.

"Be the change you want to see in the world."
This is an often over used quote, the kind you'd see on those instagram accounts that post "inspirational quotes" in order to boost their own egos. I understand that it might seem trite at first reading, but I think that it has some application here.
Most people seem to look to the group, the collective of humanity for change. They seem to need a certain majority in order for change to occur, waiting upon a movement that they can latch on to. But the truth is that the group is made up of individuals, individuals that can choose to act in whatever way they choose. If one wants change, be that change. If you wish that society acted in a particular way, act that way yourself. It will be hard. Cultures do not take kindly to those who would go against them. But if you raise child with a desire to be truly invested in them, willing to help them through life, it will show in them. Perhaps more people will see your light and come to realize things about themselves and they way they act.
On the topic of social media, it is true that the current popular social medias are designed to limit public discourse and thought, instead preferring outrage culture. This leads to us often being exposed to the worst and most extreme versions of ideologies. This is why feminism is such a concern for Richard, while there certainly are people like the ones he describes, you'll also find people untouched by twitter politics.
I think that if there is a girl that you want to ask out, you should seriously consider it, even if the risk of being burned by false rape accusations. I would personally protect myself by abstaining from premarital sex, and my opinion is that any girl that is fine with such an arrangement is less likely to catch you in that. (Although be careful of those who would rope you into marriage too quickly! Never think with your dick.) Also, no one is prepared for parenthood. I am not a parent, but I have three younger siblings, with the youngest being six years old. There is a marked difference in the way my parents have chosen to raise each of us. Patience is key. If you don't already have that quality going in, you will certainly have it coming out. The rest of parenting is practical advice you can find all over the internet.
Hope you find this interesting to read. I often have many thoughts that I struggle to articulate properly through text, so please be generous. If you have a critique, please let me hear it. Thank you.
-N10A

There's so many parts of you and I can relate, I have so many things I wanna do and each time I'm set there will always be that second or multiple thoughts, etc. What I chose to do is to ignore those "what ifs" and go for it! If it works out great, if it doesn't then hey, at least I tried.

I used to overthink but now I want things done so that I know I am making progress somehow and not be at the same place.

Do it you fool