Me So Corny
Well, ma'am, thank you for being very cooperative today! Not only did you unload all the reasonably-sized stuff onto the belt from your cart, but you didn't mind me doing my mandatory cart-check for anything you may have missed, and helped me in lifting and scanning the larger items. I really do appreciate it, in all sincerity.
Ah, you forgot one other thing? Well, that's fine, don't worry. We're only human. We make mistakes. I'll wait for you to return with it... ah, wait, you say it's right here? Convenient! That's cool. Probably a candy bar or someth-
Oh. Oh-oh, ahhh, you're reaching behind yourself. My, oh, my. You... are... pulling a bag of frozen corn out of seemingly nowhere. Mystery corn! Where did the corn come from? It is a mystery! It's almost like mag-
Wait, wait... did you just pull that bag of frozen corn out of the back of your pants?! Has that thing been festering in your buttcrack? You say you have... pains in that area (making you, literally, butthurt), so you've been keeping something cool there to help it, as you dangle the thawed, dripping bag of ass-corn in front of me, expecting me to grab it, scan it, and bag it myself. Please don't give me that affronted look when I gingerly zap it with my hand-scanner and hand you a bag to put it in. That thing was resting on your ass. There's a giant water stain right on the ass of your pants where the frost melted.
I can understand needing relief for pain, but could you not have bought it first, stuck it down your pants, and THEN bought everything else afterward? Christ.
