LISTEN HERE BITCH

Discussion in 'The Edge of the Forum' started by AlanJohn, May 19, 2012.

  1. AlanJohn
    OP

    AlanJohn くたばれ

    Member
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    Jan 6, 2011
    Canada,New Jersey
    I AM YOU'RE NEW ANUS.
    LOVE ME, HATE ME, I AM YOUR NEW ANUS. OOH, I SEE YOU'RE MAD? WELL, YOU SHOULD BE MAD, BECAUSE I AM YOUR ANUS. EVERY TIME YOU HAVE SEX I HAVE SEX TOO, SOMETHING YOU VIRGINS WILL NEVER HAVE. I EAT YOUR SHIT JUST TO SAY THAT I EAT LITTLE PIECES OF SHIT LIKE YOU FOR BREAKFAST. HAHAHAAHA! - WAIT, WAS THAT A BAD LAUGH? I'M SORRY, I'M STILL PRACTICING THIS EVIL-SHIT. SO, BACK TO TOPIC! OK, NOW, I WILL BE YOUR ANUS. YOU PROBABLY ALREADY KNOW THAT. I WILL BE DOING EVERYTHING YOUR OLD, SHITTY, GRUNDY ASS DID BEFORE ME. THIS INCLUDES:
    1. MAKE SHIT
    2. MAKE SHIT COME OUT
    3. GIVE BIRTH
    4. EVALUATE SHIT
    5. MAKE CRAP
    6. ENJOY ANAL SEX
    7. DISPOSE SHIT DURING ANAL SEX
    8. DISPOSE SHIT WHEN YOU DO NOT WANT ME TOO
    OK, BITCH DID YOU GET THAT RIGHT? THATS ALAN JOHN'S® OFFICIAL ANUS™ FOR ONLY 19.99$
    [​IMG]
    ORDER NOW AND GET A FireGay® PENILE JAMMER™ FOR FREE. HERE'S HOW TO ORDER:

    Call 1-800-anal-johney.
    All calls in the USA are free. This is a TV-only product, it cannot be bought in stores.
     


  2. DiscostewSM

    DiscostewSM GBAtemp Guru

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    I said what what?
     
  3. AlanJohn
    OP

    AlanJohn くたばれ

    Member
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    YOU SAID WHAT WHAT, IN THE ALAN JOHN'S® OFFICIAL ANUS™
    YOU SAID WHAT WHAT, IN THE ALAN JOHN'S® OFFICIAL ANUS™
    YOU SAID WHAT WHAT, IN THE ALAN JOHN'S® OFFICIAL ANUS™
    YOU SAID WHAT WHAT, IN THE ALAN JOHN'S® OFFICIAL ANUS™
    YOU WANNA DO IT IN MY ALAN JOHN'S® OFFICIAL ANUS™, IN MY ALAN JOHN'S® OFFICIAL ANUS™?
    YOU WANNA DO IT IN MY ALAN JOHN'S® OFFICIAL ANUS™, IN MY ALAN JOHN'S® OFFICIAL ANUS™?
    YOU WANNA DO IT IN MY ALAN JOHN'S® OFFICIAL ANUS™, IN MY ALAN JOHN'S® OFFICIAL ANUS™?
    LETS DO IT IN THE ALAN JOHN'S® OFFICIAL ANUS™, OKAY
     
  4. Tom Bombadildo

    Tom Bombadildo Honk!

    pip Contributor
    GBAtemp Patron
    Tom Bombadildo is a Patron of GBAtemp and is helping us stay independent!

    Our Patreon
    10,260
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    Jul 11, 2009
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    I forgot
    shutupandtakeallmymoney.jpg
     
    1 person likes this.
  5. machomuu

    machomuu Drops by occasionally

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    The Courtroom
    Finally, I ordered my new anus weeks ago.
     
    1 person likes this.
  6. AlanJohn
    OP

    AlanJohn くたばれ

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    @PEOPLE_WHO_DON'T_BUY_ALAN JOHN'S® OFFICIAL ANUS™:
    GO FUCK YOURSELF, ANALLY!
     
  7. machomuu

    machomuu Drops by occasionally

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    I didn't know how to apply it, so I threw it away.
     
  8. Lilith Valentine

    Lilith Valentine GBATemp's Wolfdog™ Kneel before the Queen

    Member
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    Antarctica
    Between insane and insecure
    I am quite pleased with the anus I have right now. Thank you very much.
     
  9. AlanJohn
    OP

    AlanJohn くたばれ

    Member
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    IT'S QUITE SIMPLE, MY FRIEND.
    ALL YOU NEED TO DO IS FIND A 0.6MM DRILL AND INSERT IT INTO YOUR BELLY-BUTTON. AFTER 3 MINUTES OF USING THE DRILL, EVENTUALLY YOUR OLD ANUS WILL FALL. AFTER THE ANUS IS NO-LONGER A PART OF YOUR BODY, LITTLE GNOMES AND TROLLS WILL START POPPING OUT OF THE PLACE THAT USED TO BE YOUR ANUS. NOW, AFTER ALL OF THE GNOMES AND TROLLS ARE GONE, YOU ARE ELIGIBLE TO INSERT YOUR NEW ALAN JOHN® OFFICIAL ANUS™~~!!
     
  10. TheRedfox

    TheRedfox Admire our great leader ;o;

    Member
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    May 17, 2012
    Saint Kitts and Nevis
    Nope
    ...
    ...
    ...
    My brain can't handle that instructions, i lost my ***** xD
     
  11. machomuu

    machomuu Drops by occasionally

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    The Courtroom
    I'm not using an anus I just threw away.
     
  12. Black-Ice

    Black-Ice Founder of the Church of Renamon

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    Oct 31, 2011
    London
  13. Quietlyawesome94

    Quietlyawesome94 GBAtemp Maniac

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    The Internet
    Wuh? I just got done installing your last product!

    Warning: Spoilers inside!

    :creep:
     
  14. TheRedfox

    TheRedfox Admire our great leader ;o;

    Member
    194
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    May 17, 2012
    Saint Kitts and Nevis
    Nope
    Well, i finally finished removing my anus.
    But i lost my penis and balls cuz i did it wrong :(
    Now i want $500 because you gived me wrong instructions :(
     
  15. AlanJohn
    OP

    AlanJohn くたばれ

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    YOU STILL HAVE A PENIS AND BALLS? LOL, N00B! REAL MEN GET CASTRATED!
     
  16. Brian117

    Brian117 GBAtemp Psycho!

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    Oh god, I thought you left...

    Guess dreams don't last forever.
     
  17. AlanJohn
    OP

    AlanJohn くたばれ

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    LURK MOAR
    THE LAST TIME I LEFT GBATEMP WAS 32 MONTHS AGO.
     
  18. FireGrey

    FireGrey Undercover Admin

    Member
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    Apr 13, 2010
    oh gawd my penile jammer does not mix well with the anus i ordered from you!
     
  19. SinHarvest24

    SinHarvest24 Shiroyasha

    Member
    999
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    Oct 8, 2010
    Chad
    Anywhere you think of me.
    :meme:

    []spoier too drunl to llook for one[]/spoelr
     
  20. Luigi2012SM64DS

    Luigi2012SM64DS G-old member

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    Minecrapt
    ok i got my anus but how do i use it? do i put it in my butt?