Help me write a poem

Discussion in 'General Off-Topic Chat' started by Pyrmon, Apr 14, 2011.

Apr 14, 2011

Help me write a poem by Pyrmon at 11:08 PM (919 Views / 0 Likes) 9 replies

  1. Pyrmon
    OP

    Member Pyrmon Burnin' Monkey Love

    Joined:
    Sep 25, 2010
    Messages:
    1,086
    Location:
    Montreal
    Country:
    Canada
    I got this assignment to make an argumentative poem. I need to find a cause or subject and defend my thesis with arguments in the form of a poem. I got a few subjects, but I have a little difficulty starting the poem. The subjects are as follows:
    Humanity is retarded(all that is wrong with humanity)
    Suicide
    Israelo-palestinian conflict
    Anything, really. As long as there is a thesis.
    It's free poetry, so no specific syllable count or rhymes.
    Anyone could help me by giving me a few lines to get me started?
     
  2. alkahest

    Member alkahest GBAtemp Regular

    Joined:
    Jun 17, 2010
    Messages:
    147
    Country:
    United States
    use ur head and try thinking !!!!!


    Share |


    suicidal feeling




    suicide, suicide in my head,
    suicide, suicide i'm nearly dead,
    suicide, suicide my wrists are cut,
    suicide, suicide i know i'm morally unwell.

    suicide, suicide still in my head,
    suicide, suicide the razors red,
    suicide, suicide my hands dread,
    suicide, suicide i know i'm morally unwell.


    suicide, suicide prevailing in my head,
    suicide, suicide the beginning of life,
    suicide, suicide the end of sorrow,
    suicide, suicide the end of pain.

    suicide, suicide in my head,
    suicide, suicide c'mon pull the trigger,
    suicide, suicide im dead,
    suicide, suicide i know i'm morally unwell.

    Mukunda Jajoo

    poem hunter.com
     
  3. Law

    Member Law rip ninjacat that zarcon made me

    Joined:
    Aug 14, 2007
    Messages:
    4,132
    Location:
    ‭jerkland
    Country:
    United Kingdom
    Suicide is sad
    An end to innocent life
    Unfortunate shame
     
  4. ShawnTRods

    Member ShawnTRods GBAtemp Psycho!

    Joined:
    Mar 26, 2011
    Messages:
    4,282
    Location:
    London
    Country:
    United Kingdom
    Well, I was never good at writing poems when I was given specific subjects. But if I was given those options, I would go for that.
     
  5. SinHarvest24

    Member SinHarvest24 Shiroyasha

    Joined:
    Oct 8, 2010
    Messages:
    999
    Location:
    Anywhere you think of me.
    Country:
    Trinidad and Tobago
    Suicide

    Where i am,
    no one's looking for me,
    nowhere to go,
    what should i do,
    Suicide,
    i'm coming for you.

    Who i am,
    no one cares,
    i'm a little scared,
    no one to hear my scream,
    Suicide,
    i'm coming for you.

    Dead i am,
    no more sorrow,
    everyone bow their heads,
    no more being alone,
    Suicide,
    I've found you.




    hope this gives you an idea to work with.
    Warning: Spoilers inside!
     
  6. Pyrmon
    OP

    Member Pyrmon Burnin' Monkey Love

    Joined:
    Sep 25, 2010
    Messages:
    1,086
    Location:
    Montreal
    Country:
    Canada
    Thanks for you replies. They are really helping me. But I have until next week, so keep the suggestions running!
     
  7. Shinigami357

    Member Shinigami357 Current "give a fuck" level: Honey Badger

    Joined:
    Jul 29, 2010
    Messages:
    1,648
    Country:
    Philippines
    Weird, I thought your avatar reminded me of someone else... Well, anyway, to the subject at hand. Everyone seems to like the suicide subject better, so... I'mma help you (hopefully) write about how homo sapiens are retards. It's free verse, right?

    children weak and starving
    the elderly sick and dying
    people enraged and fighting
    communities torn asunder

    wars that prolong the suffering
    calamities that tear our roots apart
    disease and famine spreading
    yet our leaders keep bickering


    Well, I'm pretty much tapped out of verse right now (I haven't eaten yet) so if you like add on your own rantings (in a poetic manner). I left you with the "our leader keep bickering" line, so let it rip! Chill and good luck.

    Ag_Corvus.corax
    (this is my pseudonym, haha)

    [​IMG]
     
  8. Keva

    Member Keva GBAtemp Fan

    Joined:
    Sep 28, 2004
    Messages:
    305
    Location:
    Wiltshire
    Country:
    United Kingdom
    Its an easy way out
    They claim
    Get away from
    The bills
    The heartache
    The pressure

    That comes with the territory
    of living a mortal life

    But what about the people
    you leave behind?
    Where is their
    escape?
     
  9. Pyrmon
    OP

    Member Pyrmon Burnin' Monkey Love

    Joined:
    Sep 25, 2010
    Messages:
    1,086
    Location:
    Montreal
    Country:
    Canada
    I think I got a nice one. Anyone can tell me what they think?

    At sunrise on your first day, Human
    Lights and shadows swarmed your life.
    Day after day you built tomorrow
    To make this earth a paradise.

    There should have been no envy
    for you to fulfill your destiny.
    But it has engendered jealousy
    at the raising of your first day

    Today, with an uncertain future,
    emerging jealousy gives alibi
    to hatred, preparing the ground
    for the war and all its ignominy
    to lose your soul on the road.
    At sunrise on your first day.

    Search in your heart for the rest of the magic
    Abandoned in the underworld.
    The one of Love, so that it purifies
    this heart that children have in their hands.
    Then life will be harmony
    to raise your first day.

    Consider it's translated from french, so it's not perfect.
     
  10. Pyrmon
    OP

    Member Pyrmon Burnin' Monkey Love

    Joined:
    Sep 25, 2010
    Messages:
    1,086
    Location:
    Montreal
    Country:
    Canada
    I'd appreciate some feedback on that poem as I have to hand it in tomorrow.
     

Share This Page