thaddius' Console Roast 2014 Edition - Round 12

Worst Handheld of the Eighth Generation

  • The Nintendo 3DS

    Votes: 19 3.4%
  • The Sony Playstation Vita

    Votes: 80 14.4%
  • The Nvidia Shield

    Votes: 170 30.5%
  • The Neo Geo X

    Votes: 288 51.7%

  • Total voters
    557
  • Poll closed .

Foxi4

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I have no idea how anyone would take the Neo Geo X ($199.99, currently on offer on Amazon for $154.99, they're probably getting rid of this thing) over the NVidia Shield (also $199.99) when the latter is about ten zillion quadrillion times better and it can do the exact same thing the Neo Geo X does and more. I mean, it's a choice between FinalBurn Alpha and every emulator available on the Android Marketplace plus Android games plus exclusive NVidia content from the Tegrazone plus PC streaming. I mean, c'mon guys, this is a no-brainer.
 

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I have no idea how anyone would take the Neo Geo X ($199.99, currently on offer on Amazon for $154.99, they're probably getting rid of this thing) over the NVidia Shield (also $199.99) when the latter is about ten zillion quadrillion times better and it can do the exact same thing the Neo Geo X does and more. I mean, it's a choice between FinalBurn Alpha and every emulator available on the Android Marketplace plus Android games plus exclusive NVidia content from the Tegrazone plus PC streaming. I mean, c'mon guys, this is a no-brainer.

It's because "LOL ANDROID HANDHELDS ARE GAY". :rolleyes: While everyone else is bitching about that, I'll just be sitting here enjoying my portable GTA 3-SA, Dreamcast, PS1, SNES, NES, GBA, DS, GB/C, Mega drive, Arcade, etc etc etc etc etc....:)
 

Foxi4

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It's because "LOL ANDROID HANDHELDS ARE GAY". :rolleyes: While everyone else is bitching about that, I'll just be sitting here enjoying my portable GTA 3-SA, Dreamcast, PS1, SNES, NES, GBA, DS, GB/C, Mega drive, Arcade, etc etc etc etc etc....:)
I'll be the first to admit that Android as it is right now is a retarded OS that has to get rid of its reliance on Dalvik and get closer to the bare metal (I know they'll be changing the VM now, but... it should be entirely optional, native apps are just better), but given the choice between the Neo Geo-Almost-Worked-Out-X and the Shield now that the Shield received a price cut, I would have to be really drunk and high to pick the Neo Geo X. The Shield is just better in every respect, there's no denying it.
 

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I have no idea how anyone would take the Neo Geo X ($199.99, currently on offer on Amazon for $154.99, they're probably getting rid of this thing) over the NVidia Shield (also $199.99) when the latter is about ten zillion quadrillion times better and it can do the exact same thing the Neo Geo X does and more. I mean, it's a choice between FinalBurn Alpha and every emulator available on the Android Marketplace plus Android games plus exclusive NVidia content from the Tegrazone plus PC streaming. I mean, c'mon guys, this is a no-brainer.
Erm...wasn't the shield a hundred bucks more expensive, according to the OP? I remember it being cut in price at some point, but I think amazon is ALSO trying to get rid of that thing.


In any case, it's an easy vote for the neo geo X on this round. Kinda too bad...I was curious how the archos gamepad, JXD<number> and all those other tablets-with-gamecontrollers would fare.
 

Foxi4

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Erm...wasn't the shield a hundred bucks more expensive, according to the OP? I remember it being cut in price at some point, but I think amazon is ALSO trying to get rid of that thing. In any case, it's an easy vote for the neo geo X on this round. Kinda too bad...I was curious how the archos gamepad, JXD<number> and all those other tablets-with-gamecontrollers would fare.
It used to be. Now it's sold for $199.99, just like the Neo Geo X, except for rare instances when it's on sale. The devices now retail for the same amount of money and one is clearly superior than the other, so it's a no contest situation to me. ;)
 
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Dork

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>people actually voting for the Vita or 3DS
The Vita and 3DS are the perfect pair. Both have great third-party support, plenty of full-fledged exclusives. The Vita is a weeaboo machine and 3DS has all the Nintendo titles you'll need.

As for the Shield, I'm not really into Android gaming. In the shields case, a majority of games aren't optimized for it and don't really take advantage of its hardware. I would never buy one just to use it as an emulator machine because nowadays there are so many different mediums to emulate games it isn't even funny, though I really don't care anyway because I'd just play games on their original hardware.
 

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Since when has ~80 million in sales = "not a good history"? The PSP started out slow, but after a few years the sales skyrocketed, just like the PS3's did. To put it into perspective, the GBA (including all the revisions) only ever topped at ~80 mil as well.
Did you forget the PSP's 80 million sales? Oh, and let's also forget PSP's huge library of mainstream games such as two of its own Grand Theft Auto Games, Monster Hunter, Gran Turismo, ton of Final Fantasy spinoffs, Kingdom Hearts, two God of War games, spinoffs from several PS2 titles, and tons more that I'm probably forgetting. But whatever, let's ignore Sony's handhelds in favor of Nintendo's.

I said portability was important, not sales. Do you have any idea how large the PSP and PSVita are? I also said they're still functional as handhelds if you've got large pockets, but most people don't have those. Which is why I'm surprised that the PSPGo didn't do so well; that one would more easily fit into the standard gamers' pocket. Finally, only when the thing can fit comfortably in my pocket do I start to worry about its sales figures. Nintendo handhelds have always fit in my pockets and they've always had great game libraries. (Except for the winner of thaddius' first edition of the portable console roast.) The 3DS XL might be pushing it a bit in its size, but it still fits. I'm sure you've noticed how all of Nintendo's handhelds have comfortably fit in your pocket.
 

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I said portability was important, not sales. Do you have any idea how large the PSP and PSVita are? I also said they're still functional as handhelds if you've got large pockets, but most people don't have those. Which is why I'm surprised that the PSPGo didn't do so well; that one would more easily fit into the standard gamers' pocket. Finally, only when the thing can fit comfortably in my pocket do I start to worry about its sales figures. Nintendo handhelds have always fit in my pockets and they've always had great game libraries. (Except for the winner of thaddius' first edition of the portable console roast.) The 3DS XL might be pushing it a bit in its size, but it still fits. I'm sure you've noticed how all of Nintendo's handhelds have comfortably fit in your pocket.
You don't seem to understand what "portable" means - it certainly doesn't mean "you can put it in your pocket", but that's besides the point since I was always carrying around my PSP-2000 in my pocket just fine, and it was in a carrying case too, so your pockets must be feeble in size. The 3DS XL and the PSVita are almost the same size, the PSVita being slightly wider, but it's definitely not "oversized" as you claim.
IhC9wx4.jpg
I won't even bring up the 2DS since that thing isn't a clamshell like the rest of the *DS line of handhelds.
 
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Dork

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I said portability was important, not sales. Do you have any idea how large the PSP and PSVita are? I also said they're still functional as handhelds if you've got large pockets, but most people don't have those. Which is why I'm surprised that the PSPGo didn't do so well; that one would more easily fit into the standard gamers' pocket. Finally, only when the thing can fit comfortably in my pocket do I start to worry about its sales figures. Nintendo handhelds have always fit in my pockets and they've always had great game libraries. (Except for the winner of thaddius' first edition of the portable console roast.) The 3DS XL might be pushing it a bit in its size, but it still fits. I'm sure you've noticed how all of Nintendo's handhelds have comfortably fit in your pocket.

There are other mediums to carry around a handheld other than your pocket you know.

Besides, if you can fit a 3DS XL in your pocket, a PSP and a Vita can definitely fit.
 

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It's because "LOL ANDROID HANDHELDS ARE GAY". :rolleyes: While everyone else is bitching about that, I'll just be sitting here enjoying my portable GTA 3-SA, Dreamcast, PS1, SNES, NES, GBA, DS, GB/C, Mega drive, Arcade, etc etc etc etc etc....:)
Ugh! I need to get one of these!
 

calmwaters

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There are other mediums to carry around a handheld other than your pocket you know.

Besides, if you can fit a 3DS XL in your pocket, a PSP and a Vita can definitely fit.

Yes; well why should I have to carry around a backpack or a *cough* purse *cough* carrying case?
You don't seem to understand what "portable" means - it certainly doesn't mean "you can put it in your pocket", but that's besides the point since I was always carrying around my PSP-2000 in my pocket just fine, and it was in a carrying case too, so your pockets must be feeble in size. The 3DS XL and the PSVita are almost the same size, the PSVita being slightly wider, but it's definitely not "oversized" as you claim.
IhC9wx4.jpg
I won't even bring up the 2DS since that thing isn't a clamshell like the rest of the *DS line of handhelds.
Portable: you can carry it around. My purple Nintendo GameCube is portable, just like my laptop. Those are clearly too large to fit in my pockets, plus you need a tv and cables to play the GameCube. You're hinting at preferences: I like carrying my handheld in my pocket without a carrying case. Feeble pockets? Where do you come up with this stuff? And I don't say it's oversized like a 350 lb. person; I just say it's large, which makes it not preferential when I've got a smaller handheld that'll fit more easily in my pocket and that still has a nice library of games. *insert Gameboy reference here*
 

Foxi4

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Yes; well why should I have to carry around a backpack or a *cough* purse *cough* carrying case?
Portable: you can carry it around. My purple Nintendo GameCube is portable, just like my laptop. Those are clearly too large to fit in my pockets, plus you need a tv and cables to play the GameCube. You're hinting at preferences: I like carrying my handheld in my pocket without a carrying case. Feeble pockets? Where do you come up with this stuff? And I don't say it's oversized like a 350 lb. person; I just say it's large, which makes it not preferential when I've got a smaller handheld that'll fit more easily in my pocket and that still has a nice library of games. *insert Gameboy reference here*
A portable console is a system that you can use independently of the mains without having to connect it to a television. Your laptop is portable, but you're not keeping it in your pocket. Your Gamecube is not portable because you can't use it outside of a household setting, or at least without access to the mains and a television.

"Portable console" means a little bit more than the words "portable" and "console" put together, that's not how vocabulary works, otherwise hot dogs would be made of actual canines. Just because you can "move a console around" doesn't mean that it's a portable console.
 

Tom Bombadildo

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I said portability was important, not sales. Do you have any idea how large the PSP and PSVita are? I also said they're still functional as handhelds if you've got large pockets, but most people don't have those. Which is why I'm surprised that the PSPGo didn't do so well; that one would more easily fit into the standard gamers' pocket. Finally, only when the thing can fit comfortably in my pocket do I start to worry about its sales figures. Nintendo handhelds have always fit in my pockets and they've always had great game libraries. (Except for the winner of thaddius' first edition of the portable console roast.) The 3DS XL might be pushing it a bit in its size, but it still fits. I'm sure you've noticed how all of Nintendo's handhelds have comfortably fit in your pocket.
Do you have any idea how large they are? The average pants pocket size (not counting skinny jeans and the like) has a depth of approximately 8-10 inches, with a width of approximately 5-7 inches. The PSP is 6.7in long (with the Go being 5in IIRC), and the Vita is 7.2in long. Both are more than able to fit comfortably in a majority of proper pant's pocket sizes.
 
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Foxi4

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Do you have any idea how large they are? The average pants pocket size (not counting skinny jeans and the like) has a depth of approximately 8-10 inches, with a width of approximately 5-7 inches. The PSP is 6.7in long (with the Go being 5in IIRC), and the Vita is 7.2in long. Both are more than able to fit comfortably in a majority of proper pant's pocket sizes.
Not when you're 5. ;O;

Like I said, both systems fit in my pockets just fine, even when in carrying cases. I actually have spare room for my wallet.
 
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Dork

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Yes; well why should I have to carry around a backpack or a *cough* purse *cough* carrying case?
To store things silly.

And of course if you really don't want to carry a bag of any sorts, your pockets are still there.
 

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...if you have pockets that can fit a GameCube or a laptop but can't fit a PSVita or a 3DS XL, you have a problem with spatial awareness...

My purple Nintendo GameCube is portable, just like my laptop. Those are clearly too large to fit in my pocket... the PSVita is portable, just like a 3DS XL, but they fit in my pocket... where am I losing you...
...since being able to put something in your pocket appears to be the criterion you use...
Does it really sound strange that I carry my handheld in my pocket when I travel? Or is there a special method for carrying around a handheld that you haven't told me about?
Your laptop is portable, but you're not keeping it in your pocket. Your GameCube is not portable because you can't use it outside of a household setting, or at least without access to the mains and a television.
We've established that...
 

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