So...nephew and niece came over for (after)Christmas. Ages respectively 4 and 6. We played Mario kart 8 on the wiiu. Or at least attempted. Honk if this sounds familiar...
Me: *hands controller over to everyone*
Me: okay...let's start a race. Just some basic options (*selects multiplayer, grand prix, 50CC race *). Now click this button *points at A* to join.
Nephew(4): ...but I want to play Mario.
Me: sure. here...*gently turns wiimote back to the correct position, because he had them turned over from how I gave it to him* If you now press this button here you can...
Nephew: ...but I want to play Mario.
Me: w...yes. You press these buttons. And then...see? You're the red cross on the screen. You go all the way to the left and above. There: now you've got Mario selected.
Nephew: ...but I want to play Mario! *almost begins to cry*
Niece: I don't like this vehicle. I want another vehicle.
Me: in a second. First we select the person you want to play with. Is this okay for you?
Nephew: ...but I want to play Mario!
Me: *avoids grinding teeth* you ARE playing as Mario.
Me: *reaches over and presses 'ok' again on all controllers*
Me: okay...now you select your car by pressing these buttons *gestures to 'up' and 'down'*
Niece: ...but I don't like this character.
Me: ... *reverts back to previous screen, presses 'ok' for me and nephew, she selects Peach*
Me: ahem...okay...again: which car do you pick? *quickly picks the first car he sees*
Niece: *gets the idea, but is curiously pondering over EVERY SINGLE CAR*
Nephew: I don't like this car.
Me: okay...you want this one?
Nephew: no.
*repeat the above two seemingly infinite amount of times*
Nephew: (as if nothing happened) I want the car she uses.
Niece: *has finally decided on a kart*
Me: *finds the same car...but it's in a different color* Is this okay?
Nephew: yes.
Me: okay...so...just press okay to...
Niece: I want different tiers! *starts selecting the color tiers as well*
Nephew: I don't like these tiers.
*repeat some more*
*repeat some more AFTER THAT with the kite to select*
Me: so...we take these races. Okay?
Niece: but I don't know these races!
Nephew: I want a race with monsters!
Me: *starts first race regardless*
The race is a classic 12-person race with the AI occupying 9. Niece is...okay for her age, I guess. She sorts of grasps using weapons/boosters, but forgets them immediately. Nephew(again: 4) on the other hand:
Nephew: *turns right...drives straight into the wall*
Me: *trying not to show that he's intentionally driving much slower* Hmm....
Nephew: *turns around, gets a joy from the "turn around" signal and the turtle that puts him back on track*
Niece: *seemingly avoids all boosters and weapons, but at least drives*
Nephew: *manages to drive himself in a corner* MY CAR WON'T DRIVE ANYMORE! *Mario grinding, attempting to drive into the wall at full force*
Me: ermmm...
11 months old daughter in the background: *slowly but methodically creates a block tower of FOUR ENTIRE BLOCKS all by herself! *
Me: (at daughter) awww...bravo <name daughter>. Well done.
Me: *to nephew* erm...you might want to turn around? *gently nudges wiimote sideways so he at least isn't facing the wall anymore*
Nephew: *is having more fun, despite turning and shaking the wiimote more than a barman shaking a cocktail*
Me: ey, niece...get back on the seat properly, will you?
Niece: *sat on the couch on her knees, but so absorbed in the race that she's about to fall off, faceplanting the floor*
Niece: *begrudgingly takes a less dangerous stance on the seat*
Nephew: *has found a new goal: drive in all the ravines possible*
Niece: am I first?
(note: neither can properly read at this point, and their English is also absent. But she can sort of make out numbers)
Me: no...you're seventh at this point. See the number seven there? Oh...eight now. Keep driving.
Me: *tries to snipe other racers and bump them off the road, in an attempt not to completely wipe the floor with them*
Nephew: *stuck on repeat: drive off into the ravine, get picked up and placed back on tract, drive off into the ravine again*
Niece: *finishes last lap*
Me: *somewhat drives back and forth, trying to avoid the fact that I'm stalling*
Nephew: *still on his second lap (of tree)...still happily drives into EVERY RAVINE HE SEES*
Niece: Am I first?
Me: no...you finished 9th.
Niece: ah...*continues driving...even though it's just a rail on repeat because she already finished*
*insert more infinity*
Nephew: *FINALLY drives over finish*
Game: *shows score*
Niece: hey! I can't see where I'm driving!
Me: it's okay...we go to the next race.
*repeat all this three more times*
We played two times. The second time was barely easier selecting everyone their gear. On top of that, nephew AFTER ALL THE SELECTING wanted a sleeved controller (meaning: mine), so we repeated that once again.
The both most bitter and most hilarious thing that at one point we played a Bowser's mansion race. This was more winding and curling than most races we've played thus far (and...Mario kart 8 is perhaps not the best first racer in that regard). But for some reason, nephew felt much more at home here. Not only did he not constantly ram into every wall, but he even passed some computer enemies.
Niece, on the other hand, was having much more problems with the race. Up to the point that at one point, nephew PASSED HER (this was, incidentally, the best position he'd been in in all the gaming). Before that, she was a pretty decent young gamer. But at that point, her mood IMMEDIATELY turned. Her mother (my sister-in-law) tried to comfort her, saying that she could do it. She insisted she couldn't. So when nephew passed her, she immediately dropped the wiimote and went elsewhere.
So...gaming with kids is awesome. But...you really need some patience with them.
Me: *hands controller over to everyone*
Me: okay...let's start a race. Just some basic options (*selects multiplayer, grand prix, 50CC race *). Now click this button *points at A* to join.
Nephew(4): ...but I want to play Mario.
Me: sure. here...*gently turns wiimote back to the correct position, because he had them turned over from how I gave it to him* If you now press this button here you can...
Nephew: ...but I want to play Mario.
Me: w...yes. You press these buttons. And then...see? You're the red cross on the screen. You go all the way to the left and above. There: now you've got Mario selected.
Nephew: ...but I want to play Mario! *almost begins to cry*
Niece: I don't like this vehicle. I want another vehicle.
Me: in a second. First we select the person you want to play with. Is this okay for you?
Nephew: ...but I want to play Mario!
Me: *avoids grinding teeth* you ARE playing as Mario.
Me: *reaches over and presses 'ok' again on all controllers*
Me: okay...now you select your car by pressing these buttons *gestures to 'up' and 'down'*
Niece: ...but I don't like this character.
Me: ... *reverts back to previous screen, presses 'ok' for me and nephew, she selects Peach*
Me: ahem...okay...again: which car do you pick? *quickly picks the first car he sees*
Niece: *gets the idea, but is curiously pondering over EVERY SINGLE CAR*
Nephew: I don't like this car.
Me: okay...you want this one?
Nephew: no.
*repeat the above two seemingly infinite amount of times*
Nephew: (as if nothing happened) I want the car she uses.
Niece: *has finally decided on a kart*
Me: *finds the same car...but it's in a different color* Is this okay?
Nephew: yes.
Me: okay...so...just press okay to...
Niece: I want different tiers! *starts selecting the color tiers as well*
Nephew: I don't like these tiers.
*repeat some more*
*repeat some more AFTER THAT with the kite to select*
Me: so...we take these races. Okay?
Niece: but I don't know these races!
Nephew: I want a race with monsters!
Me: *starts first race regardless*
The race is a classic 12-person race with the AI occupying 9. Niece is...okay for her age, I guess. She sorts of grasps using weapons/boosters, but forgets them immediately. Nephew(again: 4) on the other hand:
Nephew: *turns right...drives straight into the wall*
Me: *trying not to show that he's intentionally driving much slower* Hmm....
Nephew: *turns around, gets a joy from the "turn around" signal and the turtle that puts him back on track*
Niece: *seemingly avoids all boosters and weapons, but at least drives*
Nephew: *manages to drive himself in a corner* MY CAR WON'T DRIVE ANYMORE! *Mario grinding, attempting to drive into the wall at full force*
Me: ermmm...
11 months old daughter in the background: *slowly but methodically creates a block tower of FOUR ENTIRE BLOCKS all by herself! *
Me: (at daughter) awww...bravo <name daughter>. Well done.
Me: *to nephew* erm...you might want to turn around? *gently nudges wiimote sideways so he at least isn't facing the wall anymore*
Nephew: *is having more fun, despite turning and shaking the wiimote more than a barman shaking a cocktail*
Me: ey, niece...get back on the seat properly, will you?
Niece: *sat on the couch on her knees, but so absorbed in the race that she's about to fall off, faceplanting the floor*
Niece: *begrudgingly takes a less dangerous stance on the seat*
Nephew: *has found a new goal: drive in all the ravines possible*
Niece: am I first?
(note: neither can properly read at this point, and their English is also absent. But she can sort of make out numbers)
Me: no...you're seventh at this point. See the number seven there? Oh...eight now. Keep driving.
Me: *tries to snipe other racers and bump them off the road, in an attempt not to completely wipe the floor with them*
Nephew: *stuck on repeat: drive off into the ravine, get picked up and placed back on tract, drive off into the ravine again*
Niece: *finishes last lap*
Me: *somewhat drives back and forth, trying to avoid the fact that I'm stalling*
Nephew: *still on his second lap (of tree)...still happily drives into EVERY RAVINE HE SEES*
Niece: Am I first?
Me: no...you finished 9th.
Niece: ah...*continues driving...even though it's just a rail on repeat because she already finished*
*insert more infinity*
Nephew: *FINALLY drives over finish*
Game: *shows score*
Niece: hey! I can't see where I'm driving!
Me: it's okay...we go to the next race.
*repeat all this three more times*
We played two times. The second time was barely easier selecting everyone their gear. On top of that, nephew AFTER ALL THE SELECTING wanted a sleeved controller (meaning: mine), so we repeated that once again.
The both most bitter and most hilarious thing that at one point we played a Bowser's mansion race. This was more winding and curling than most races we've played thus far (and...Mario kart 8 is perhaps not the best first racer in that regard). But for some reason, nephew felt much more at home here. Not only did he not constantly ram into every wall, but he even passed some computer enemies.
Niece, on the other hand, was having much more problems with the race. Up to the point that at one point, nephew PASSED HER (this was, incidentally, the best position he'd been in in all the gaming). Before that, she was a pretty decent young gamer. But at that point, her mood IMMEDIATELY turned. Her mother (my sister-in-law) tried to comfort her, saying that she could do it. She insisted she couldn't. So when nephew passed her, she immediately dropped the wiimote and went elsewhere.
So...gaming with kids is awesome. But...you really need some patience with them.