Yeah, fuck this.
I can't handle it anymore, it's too much pressure, too much anxiety, too much people that I dislike.
I have literally no friends and I talk to no one, but somehow people still manage to fuck with me, why? I don't get it. And I can't ask them to stop, because it gets worse.
The classes themselves are not hard, I'm actually having a lot of fun with some subjects like Physics, the equations and stuff are really really fun to do. But I can't handle school itself anymore.
I don't know what I'll do in the long run, we have a test that you can take after you're 18 to skip high school, and I'm thinking of doing that, I'd still graduate in the same year as all my other friends which would be nice and I'm pretty sure that I'm more than capable of passing that test. But something still feels weird, it's like the very idea of not going to school goes against me as a person, it seems like the only logical solution for me right now, to get rid of this anxiety, but it also seems wrong to do.
It's like breaking up with someone whom you know you don't like but you're afraid of being alone if you do so. I just want to be able to have some time to figure things out, school is pushing me too hard.
I'm on first year of high school, only 2 years left, but that makes it into a even less worse idea, because it would be easy to recover.
I guess I'm looking at life as if it was a race, a race that no one wins in the end, but a race nonetheless, I'm trying to change that view, I just want to enjoy life, but school and the pressure that comes along with it and living in such a society is bringing me down; fear of not being successful; fear of not being accepted socially; fear of being poor, but amidst all those fears, I forgot to be afraid of sadness.
Help me.
I can't handle it anymore, it's too much pressure, too much anxiety, too much people that I dislike.
I have literally no friends and I talk to no one, but somehow people still manage to fuck with me, why? I don't get it. And I can't ask them to stop, because it gets worse.
The classes themselves are not hard, I'm actually having a lot of fun with some subjects like Physics, the equations and stuff are really really fun to do. But I can't handle school itself anymore.
I don't know what I'll do in the long run, we have a test that you can take after you're 18 to skip high school, and I'm thinking of doing that, I'd still graduate in the same year as all my other friends which would be nice and I'm pretty sure that I'm more than capable of passing that test. But something still feels weird, it's like the very idea of not going to school goes against me as a person, it seems like the only logical solution for me right now, to get rid of this anxiety, but it also seems wrong to do.
It's like breaking up with someone whom you know you don't like but you're afraid of being alone if you do so. I just want to be able to have some time to figure things out, school is pushing me too hard.
I'm on first year of high school, only 2 years left, but that makes it into a even less worse idea, because it would be easy to recover.
I guess I'm looking at life as if it was a race, a race that no one wins in the end, but a race nonetheless, I'm trying to change that view, I just want to enjoy life, but school and the pressure that comes along with it and living in such a society is bringing me down; fear of not being successful; fear of not being accepted socially; fear of being poor, but amidst all those fears, I forgot to be afraid of sadness.
Help me.