Rydian's Hammer

[DiabloStorm]

Did somebody say meme?
I'm quoting this out of context but this needs to be immortalized somewhere. I can't stop fucking laughing at the idea of Rydian, fur and all, going to a hardware store to buy a hammer to destroy things with.

Let's say I go buy a hammer. I take it home, the company that made it can fuck off. I have my hammer, I can do whatever. If I use it in a way they do not like, fuck them, I'm going to use it in that way all I want.

Somebody draw him with a hammer, attacking a mailman or something.

 

[FAST6191]

?

 

[emigre]

 

[Veho]

 

[DiabloStorm]

This is my hammer. There are many like it, but this one is mine.
My hammer is my best friend. It is my life. I must master it as I must master my life.
My hammer, without me, is useless. Without my hammer, I am useless. I must swing my hammer true. I must swing straighter than my enemy who is trying to kill me. I must smash him before he smashes me. I will...
My hammer and I know that what counts in this war is not the nails we drive, the clang of our steel, or the holes we make. We know that it is the hits that count. We will hit...
My hammer is anthropomorphic, even as I, because it is my life. Thus, I will learn it as a brother. I will learn its weaknesses, its strength, its wood, its metal, its claw and its face. I will keep my hammer clean and ready, even as I am clean and ready. We will become part of each other. We will...
Before God, I swear this creed. My hammer and I are the defenders of my home. We are the masters of our enemy. We are the saviors of my life.
So be it, until victory is mine and there is no enemy, but peace!​

 

[FAST6191]

This is my hammer. There are many like it, but this one is mine.
My hammer is my best friend. It is my life. I must master it as I must master my life.
My hammer, without me, is useless. Without my hammer, I am useless. I must swing my hammer true. I must swing straighter than my enemy who is trying to kill me. I must smash him before he smashes me. I will...
My hammer and I know that what counts in this war is not the nails we drive, the clang of our steel, or the holes we make. We know that it is the hits that count. We will hit...
My hammer is anthropomorphic, even as I, because it is my life. Thus, I will learn it as a brother. I will learn its weaknesses, its strength, its wood, its metal, its claw and its face. I will keep my hammer clean and ready, even as I am clean and ready. We will become part of each other. We will...
Before God, I swear this creed. My hammer and I are the defenders of my home. We are the masters of our enemy. We are the saviors of my life.
So be it, until victory is mine and there is no enemy, but peace!​

Read without context and/or pretending a redneck/god squad type is saying it that is actually very disturbing.

 

[DiabloStorm]

Read without context and/or pretending a redneck/god squad type is saying it that is actually very disturbing.

My sense of humor is a little disturbing.
It begs the question, what would Rydian be using it on?
Perhaps a bathtub/bath supplies?
Perhaps baby seals?
Either way, the company that produced it will tremble in fear at what they've become accomplices of.

 

[Veho]

Humor? I thought that was just the standard Hammerman's Creed

 

[Gahars]

 

[FAST6191]

 

[Veho]

 

[nukeboy95]

this thread is getting hammered with jokes

 

[Lemmy Koopa]

Did somebody say meme?