"Sorry"

@StarTrekVoyager If its not your fault, then you're right, you shouldn't have to apologize. However, with your specific example its just considered being polite to avoid problems. Not doing so is just kinda being a dick. Your choice, just don't be surprised if people aren't happy about it, or escalate the problem. Bump into the wrong guy and give him the finger and he might just be having a bad day and decide to knock your punk ass out right there in the street.

Yeah, I was kinda extreme on this case but at a lot of times, I do something that isn't wrong IMO, and I must force myself to apologize even if I don't think it. When I do that, I feel humiliated.

Right. In a situation where you are honestly not at fault in any way, and the person is just bullying you into apologizing, I would also stand firm and refuse. More often than not, when people make a mistake, it humiliates them. Rather than be an adult and take responsibility for their actions, they'd rather make it look like someone else's fault. Instead of being bitter that you apologized for nothing, or humiliated, know that by doing so, you are proving you are the more adult person in the situation. If the situation ever gets out of hand, and there are other people around, doing so can actually even buy you quite a bit of good credit if things escalate.

Flipping them off like you don't give a fuck is just asking for trouble, though.

@MadMageKefka - But what if I don't give a fuck :^) ?

@Ev1l0rd - yolo. Pls record fight and upload. lol.

@StarTrekVoyager Makes a good point, if the idea of saying sorry is socially enforced on people then is a new discussion all together. Now let's for this example say it is enforced, because the idea of this is to apologize for something that you did. Then the rule should perhaps be acceptance, I mean if you are forced to already do something out of your character and you do it cause it was a rule, then that should still allow someone to be upset? Why would someone go through the idea of having to apologize only to realize it didn't work?

Can you give a more specific example?

@Sonic Angel Knight that last part of your blog identifies me perfectly. I feel like, as a child, I had values instilled in me that no one else seems to care about. Maybe not so much the forgiveness, but honesty, repaying debts, generosity, integrity, etc.

@Sonic Angel Knight - The reason we teach the concept of saying sorry when a kid fucks up is because it instills morals in them. Because we associate the word "sorry" with the concept of "i done fucked up and i apologize", making a kid realize their behavior was unacceptable. If you don't teach kids morals, you will end up with narcissistic bastards who probably won't ever be able to interact normally with a human being.

The reason we do this over "make things right" with kids is often because it's often simply not feasible to "make things right". Kids can't be prosecuted until they are 12 under the law (at least in my country), so any sort of teaching of responsibility and morals must come from the parents. As an example, say a kid breaks something. With an adult, we expect them to either repair it or pay for the replacement/repairs. With a kid it simply isn't possible to force them to pay for it (since kids have little money) and kids usually can't repair stuff.

Why "sorry" doesn't cut it when you are an adult (or a teen for that matter) is because at that point you are expected to be able to make things right when you fuck up. You are expected to be able to pay up if you break/steal things. You are expected to be able to take that punishment and learn from the experience to not do it again. Same goes for everything else. People are very forgiving, but they have limits and if you push the limits one time too many, they won't be willing to forgive you anymore, no matter what you do.

If that is the case then this whole idea shouldn't exist, there is no reason to teach someone that even a kid just to grow up and not be able to use it.

@Sonic Angel Knight - Read my last sentence. If you make a tiny mistake once, people will generally accept it if you say sorry. If it's a big problem, people will accept your apologies if you fix said problem. If it's a behavioral problem, people won't be able to forgive you, because they don't think you will genuinely change.

Teaching kids to say sorry is something that is important. Not just for the teaching for morals, but to give them a way to apologize for their faults. When kids grow up into adults however, they aren't expected to just say sorry and get to walk along free, they are expected to say sorry and fix their fuck up. If they cannot do that, they are expected to say sorry and never fucking make that mistake again and face any kind of legal punishment that may follow (if it is that extreme that is. Note that with legal punishment I also entail getting fired from your job).

I go by this:
Can you do something to make up for it? If yes, then do something to make up for it. If no, say something other than sorry.

The word "Sorry" has been overused. At this point it makes me even more mad when somebody says sorry unless it is in a very, very, sincere tone.

"You told your father to find a closer parking spot because you didn't want to walk the distance of 8 parking spots. Now he has to walk .75 miles just to eat lunch because he had the best parking spot he could get! You know he has bad knees!"
"I'm sorry"
like what the hell does this do? It does nothing.

Sorry is a word, not an action.

The youth of today need to get some responsibility and accountability.

@blujay 'the youth of today'
you sound like an eighty year old man ranting about them kids with them fidget spinners.

1. fidget spinner bullshit is dumb
2. ya are right, it's become just something assumed to be the end all cure to issues, when it's not, sadly it becames a word that has lost meaning now

well, I still consider myself a part of "the youth of today". I just haven't followed the same pattern as almost every other 20+ year old. Getting drunk, getting people pregnant, leaving them, and creating even more troubled spirits.

1. agreed

@blujay that's an extreme stereotype...

yes i know. i haven't met many others that don't fit into that category that aren't a part of my daily life. probably because I spend my time on the internet

well I'm almost 20(I'm 18) and not like that

22, can confidently say I'm not like that.