Things You Don't Want to Hear During a Surgery

VinsCool

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- "Wait a minute! If this thing is the liver, then what the heck did I just take out?"

- "Please hold this... this... eh thing."

- "Take good notes! This could be very important for the autopsy."

- "Shit! I dropped my watch in this corner."

- "Poor guy, what a puzzle! I hope I didn't put a part upside down."

- "Wooops! Say, did someone ever survive 500 ml of this?"

- "Crap! Electricity went out again!"

- "With all of this, we could make a solid report for the Bloopers of Surgeons!"

- "You know, there's money to do selling kidneys, and this guy happens to have two of them in excellent health."

- "These anesthetics, so good. Take a shot too, you will trip in no time man!"

- "No one moves! I lost a contact lens!"

- "Could someone help me keep this guy quiet? His screamings are ruining my concentration!"

- "No need to cry over it, not like it was a valuable human being anyway."

- "Accept this sacrifice, O Dark Lord!"

- "Why the heck is this thing in there??!!"

- "We only have enough blood to save one patient, which one shall we spare?"

- "You know what? I just realised that we chopped the wrong leg!"

- "Everybody, stay calm! Please think about it. A liver simply couldn't disappear like that!"

- "Does anyone know how to make a cardiac massage? I think his heart stopped minutes ago."

- "I hate when there are missing parts after reconstruction!"

- "Woooops!"

- "Let's do this quickly, I have a train to take in an hour."

- "This is funny! Look! When I pull this thing, the leg twitches! What could this one do?"

- "I hope I didn't forget a tool inside."

- "Okay guys! This is a brand new experiment for all of us! Let's be sure this guy is sleeping, then we'll be good to go."

- "Wait, so you're saying that guy wasn't the patient waiting for a sex change? And you tell me NOW?"

- "Has anyone seen my scalpel? Couldn't find it since the other patient."

- "Take a picture from this angle, it's disgustingly beautiful!"

- "It couldn't be that bad. He already had children anyway, no?"

- "Here we go! The nurse fainted! I swear they aren't as good as they used to be!"

- "Oh look! This is my wife's cheater! Perfect timing to get a revenge!"

- "Yes I promise, it still cuts! Just try it, some rust never killed anyone!"

- "How come, there is no more oxygen? Couldn't you tell me an hour ago?"

- "Holy fuck, this is gonna blow up!"

- "How many stained clothes in the trash?"
"Six."
"Count again."
"Still six."
"Fine, let's reopen the guy and check if I didn't forget one inside."

- "No one considered checking the blood group before attempting this perfusion? Really guys?"

- "So what's the score at the match, right now?"

- "You're saying this man lived 20 years with this thing inside? Holy shit."

- "The building caught fire! Everyone get out of here!"

- "No no no! I tell you again, this part goes here!"

- "Fuck! Page 98 of the manual missing! How am I supposed to proceed now?"

- "Gotta hurry up! Only 5 minutes of anesthetics left!"

- "They really should replace the lighting system, I couldn't see what I'm doing."

- "Don't worry, the floor is cleaned almost everyday. Put it back in and don't bother."

- "Here we go! It should stay in place."

- "250, isn't that a bit too much for the cardiac rhythm?"

- "Darn it! See, this is what happens when you make me laugh!"

- "And now, slowly pull out the brain and insert it in the gorilla cranium."

- "Nurse, did he sign this paper before the operation? No? Fine, let's abort this."

- "Call a janitor, we need to clean this mess."

- "Fido! FIDOOOO! Bring this back! Oooh stupid dog!"

- "Pass me this uh... thing, on your left."

- "Doctor, where did your cigar go?"
 

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