I feel like shit

So sup. 17-turning 18 on the 30th-year old here. i guess my mind finally succumbed to the average teen depression. I feel like shit, and i dont know why.

I kinda fucked up my education due to extreme laziness in school.

I've attended summer school through all 4 years of high school, and now that im done and about to start college, its a hassle for me to get myself set into the community college i was accepted to. Not to mention recently my high school sent me a "Welcome Back" letter, thats supposed to signify ill be attending them again in September, which I am severely hoping is a mistake, as i wont know for sure until tomorrow.

I was sleeping out of the house from since monday. Summer school ended on tuesday, and tuesday night i went to a friend's house. From then i continuously moved from friends' house to friends' house to sleep as i didnt want to sleep at home.

Thursday during the day i had to pack up all of my nice things, including my ps3 and 25" monitor, so that my room can get painted. Because of that, it is now sunday and all of the things in the room are now piled on the bed, and tonight also happens to be the night im stuck sleeping at home. So i have no bed, and no room. I'm currently in the kitchen on my laptop feeling depressed to shit.

At some point between now and either passing out or 6 am, i need to get up and prepare my mom's clothes for work for her, so she doesnt have to do it.

I found myself thinking that life was full of shit, and the simplest way to not have to deal with any of it would be to be dead. But i dont wanna kill myself. So yea.

Obviously almost everything i stated here was my fault, and obviously im dealing with it. I just wanted to vent it out some so i can feel better in some way. I'm not giving up/running away. I'm not gonna kill myself, thats just plain retarded. This just happens to be another one of many mental obstacles i have to overcome and this is how im attempting to start doing so

EDIT: I DO want comments. . . would make me feel better.

Comments

I think you should kill yourself

is it possible that the school made a mistake in sending the letter ? Just think that it was an accident, it seems that that is the main fact that is annoying you right now
 
im guessing you feel like this since your insanely bored

i go through these phases all the time

i always make sure to do something for a change when this happens

stupid things like walking around in a new place, or trying out simple cheap things put a smile back on my face and make me forget about whatever is/was bothering me

like right now im at work, just sitting down here on the internet nothing to do, i get home at like 8:00pm - its like a 12 hour shift and i can't be bothered to do anything, usually i go out and come back home late, and then i have to wake up and do that all again; i can't begin to tell you how much im looking forward for fall to start which should be in a months time.

just try doing something out of the normal for a change; i bet my money were just all bored to death

college should be fun, and best of luck with that !
 
Senior year in high school is always the most difficult year. It is very common and that is not just for you, everyone goes through that.

Teen depression-like stuff is very common but later on in life you'll probably figure out that you weren't really depressed at all.

once you start college you'll pretty much forget all of that for a couple of years at least.
 
I don't get it, whats there to feel shit about? You're going to college which is more than I can say for the people around my neighborhood. >.> You don't seem like you're in a financial crisis like so many people I know, and you aren't dying and/or have a painful disease. So, what is making you "feel like shit"? The high school letter? Maybe (if I read your post right) since you attended summer school there they forgot to clear out the database of students which since you attended summer school there would include you (People who work in school offices are lazy shits from my experience).
 
You could try to go out with friends, laugh more times a day (youtube helps), but I get the depression feeling occur once your brain has absorbed too much information (be it videogames, staying at home too much, lack of something, maybe life expectations)

Take it easy man.-
 
[quote name='amptor' post='3847007' date='Aug 22 2011, 06:39 AM']Senior year in high school is always the most difficult year. It is very common and that is not just for you, everyone goes through that.[/quote]

I disagree. It was the easiest year I probably had all through highschool. Since the only required course was English 12 (and i'm good at English) so every class I was in was by my choice, thus I did faaantastic in the classes.

I found earlier grades way harder because of being forced into shitty classes I didn't want to do.
 
I'd say you're set if you're going to college, graduate college...and then everything is fine too. if you get through college your life will be a piece of cake from then on. I felt the same way when younger and realistically it was a bunch of BS those times were a lot easier than later on. just get your studies done and all, don't pay attention to who has a b/f g/f that stuff doesn't matter at all (a relationship can drag you down and torment the crap out of you if you end up in the wrong one). just get to all that nonessential stuff after you get your bachelor's and you'll be fine.
 
[quote name='amptor' post='3848574' date='Aug 23 2011, 05:49 AM']I'd say you're set if you're going to college, graduate college...and then everything is fine too. if you get through college your life will be a piece of cake from then on. I felt the same way when younger and realistically it was a bunch of BS those times were a lot easier than later on. just get your studies done and all, don't pay attention to who has a b/f g/f that stuff doesn't matter at all (a relationship can drag you down and torment the crap out of you if you end up in the wrong one). just get to all that nonessential stuff after you get your bachelor's and you'll be fine.[/quote]
The truth never sounded more truer.


Getting into a relationship is very risky as no one knows the exact effect it will have on you. It's safer to stay out of that as i'm sure school itself will be stressful enough.



I don't get why you're feeling like shit though...What's the situation with your home? I don't really get it.
 
[quote name='desam57' post='3848588' date='Aug 23 2011, 12:02 AM']you need a gf, something to live for[/quote]
i already have a gf, and i dont wanna kill myself nor die.

And to everyone else thanks for commenting
 
Senior year of high school is hard as fuck. I pulled more all nighters that year than the years before. And then the stress of applying to college...

...but it all worked out for me in the end, so I'm sure it will for you too.
 

Blog entry information

Author
iggloovortex
Views
332
Comments
30
Last update

More entries in Personal Blogs

More entries from iggloovortex

General chit-chat
Help Users
    BigOnYa @ BigOnYa: Is funny, every week he cries bout something and says that's it, I'm leaving this site for good.