The bastard really fucked up now.

i know hes insane on the guitar. I dont now how he does that it insane.

Seriously... get over it mate

You said something your dad didnt appreciate. Its HIS house and your HIS son and your eating to food HE worked his ass off for at the table that HE saved up to buy.

I have a kid and if he EVER called me a name Id smack him around. Show some respect to your parent. And if you dont want to thats fine but move out. His house his rules

Your house your rules... simple as that

[quote name='#5661' post='2794007' date='Apr 30 2010, 12:13 AM'][quote name='Law' post='2793362' date='Apr 29 2010, 05:43 PM']Maybe try not calling him a "fat retarded hypocrite" at the dinner table and just shutting the fuck up.[/quote]
So being, frankly, beaten-up-a-bit for a regular sort of teenage-rebellious insult is just and fair?
No. You'd suck at being a parent[/quote]


Actually just because of the fact that parents dont do anything about kids being 'rebellious teens' we are having the crime issues and voilence issues so stfu and wait untill YOUR a parent before making such accusations. If you are a parent think hard about wether you want your kid to be raised a badmouthing lil twat or a nice kid who knows when to shut up

Also if you EVER yell at your parent be smart about it k? No insults but actually use your smarts and brains -_-

You have got to talk about shit. I'm a dad and my boy has ADHD. Sometimes we get so mad with each other and regrettably I have given him a cuff or two. You have to go back after things have cooled off and talk that shit through. If you don’t reconcile afterwards you will end up with a massive chasm between you that will never be bridged.

Despite your disability you wouldn't believe the pressures and stress other people can be under. Just see if your old man is willing to talk about it later without the testosterone flowing. If he is willing to talk then you will find a little understanding between the two of you will go a long way to stop the tensions bubbling over again.

If he is unwilling to take up your offer of a talk then defiantly seek out side help. That scuffle looked pretty serious and shouldn't continue to happen. Just make sure the anger has fully passed before trying to talk or it will just blow up again.

I read this blog post and your previous one. Here's what I think for what it's worth. Keep in mind that I've been 16, and am a parent of 2 boys.

You are at the age that freedom is so close you can smell it, you just can't reach it. This is frustrating as all fuck. It is for most everybody your age, it was for me. There's a lot of resentment that comes with that feeling of "almost free" and it's probably eating you up. What you're probably doing to vent that is spitting bile at your parents. This is pretty normal.

Now, from your parents perspective. You are their son, they are in charge of you, they have someone in their household that hates them, and it's their son. They have to keep you restrained, there is still raising to do, you are not of age yet, and you still live in their house. Communication with you is probably next to impossible, so the best they can do is bark orders, and try to make you listen. This is pretty normal.

When I was a kid (don't laugh, but I'm 46) my punishments were extremely harsh by today's standards, abuse only came into play when your dad actually punched you in the mouth. Grabbing you by the hair, wacking you on the head and yelling in your face such that you got covered in spit did not remotely qualify as abuse. I realize things are different these days, and I don't visit upon my kids what was visited upon me, thankfully the norms have changed. Still, I think it's quite possible your description of events is colored by your resentment of being treated like a child/slave/idiot or however you'd describe it.

My advice to you comes in two parts.

1. You're gonna have to live with your parents for a couple more years, and there are ways to make that easier. They will however require humility on your part. The way you talk about your parents as idiots shows through to them even though you may not tell them that directly. Try to find a reason or two to be proud of them. If nothing else, the difficulty of raising a rebellious 16 year old boy should not be lost on you. In other words, cut 'em some fucking slack man. You may find it is reciprocated, at least I'd hope it would be. You will have to follow their rules, regardless of whether or not they make any sense to you. If you've got a problem with their rules, the more maturely you can discuss it, the better chance you'll have of being listened to.

2. If you do consider your treatment to truly be abuse, and it may well be, that's something I can't know, you can talk to a school counselor about it, and that is a great first step. The trick there is, you've got to have some respect for the person you talk to, even if it's just pretend, or else they're likely to class you into the "rebellious youth" type and not really take you seriously. If you show the counselor/school psychologist/teacher that you talk to some respect, and they think you've got a valid complaint against your parents, they will know what the next step is, and they can talk to both you and your parents about that.

I know it ain't easy. Believe it or not I still remember most of how it was. It was a real bitch is what it was. My dad was a hard-ass, and it took me well into adulthood to forgive him, but he's dead now, and even though I wish he would've raised me better, I still know that I loved him, and I miss him a lot every day.

I honestly hope this helps some. I appreciate everyone that's chimed in with serious suggestions for you. We may be just an "extended family" here at GBAtemp, but we're still family.

[quote name='mthrnite' post='2794116' date='Apr 30 2010, 01:02 AM']I read this blog post and your previous one. Here's what I think for what it's worth. Keep in mind that I've been 16, and am a parent of 2 boys.

You are at the age that freedom is so close you can smell it, you just can't reach it. This is frustrating as all fuck. It is for most everybody your age, it was for me. There's a lot of resentment that comes with that feeling of "almost free" and it's probably eating you up. What you're probably doing to vent that is spitting bile at your parents. This is pretty normal.

Now, from your parents perspective. You are their son, they are in charge of you, they have someone in their household that hates them, and it's their son. They have to keep you restrained, there is still raising to do, you are not of age yet, and you still live in their house. Communication with you is probably next to impossible, so the best they can do is bark orders, and try to make you listen. This is pretty normal.

When I was a kid (don't laugh, but I'm 46) my punishments were extremely harsh by today's standards, abuse only came into play when your dad actually punched you in the mouth. Grabbing you by the hair, wacking you on the head and yelling in your face such that you got covered in spit did not remotely qualify as abuse. I realize things are different these days, and I don't visit upon my kids what was visited upon me, thankfully the norms have changed. Still, I think it's quite possible your description of events is colored by your resentment of being treated like a child/slave/idiot or however you'd describe it.

My advice to you comes in two parts.

1. You're gonna have to live with your parents for a couple more years, and there are ways to make that easier. They will however require humility on your part. The way you talk about your parents as idiots shows through to them even though you may not tell them that directly. Try to find a reason or two to be proud of them. If nothing else, the difficulty of raising a rebellious 16 year old boy should not be lost on you. In other words, cut 'em some fucking slack man. You may find it is reciprocated, at least I'd hope it would be. You will have to follow their rules, regardless of whether or not they make any sense to you. If you've got a problem with their rules, the more maturely you can discuss it, the better chance you'll have of being listened to.

2. If you do consider your treatment to truly be abuse, and it may well be, that's something I can't know, you can talk to a school counselor about it, and that is a great first step. The trick there is, you've got to have some respect for the person you talk to, even if it's just pretend, or else they're likely to class you into the "rebellious youth" type and not really take you seriously. If you show the counselor/school psychologist/teacher that you talk to some respect, and they think you've got a valid complaint against your parents, they will know what the next step is, and they can talk to both you and your parents about that.

I know it ain't easy. Believe it or not I still remember most of how it was. It was a real bitch is what it was. My dad was a hard-ass, and it took me well into adulthood to forgive him, but he's dead now, and even though I wish he would've raised me better, I still know that I loved him, and I miss him a lot every day.

I honestly hope this helps some. I appreciate everyone that's chimed in with serious suggestions for you. We may be just an "extended family" here at GBAtemp, but we're still family.[/quote]

No child should ever go through that and know that it's not your fault that your father treats you like this.
And of course you shouldn't be blamed for any of these, trust me you've done nothing wrong.
The way your parents treat you is wrong and you dont have to go through this.

I understand your need to tell someone what you are going through and internet is an easy solution but you are still
a kid so you cant see the consicounses of this yet, but try to understand this.

Most of the things you read here aren't gonna help you and most of them are wrong.
You need help from an expert, someone you can trust and talk to and can really help you.
What you are going through now can damage you phycological state at this age.
You may feel alone now but you are not, there are people that can help you.Just trust them and talk to them.

I'm sure some kids may give you a hard time now but they are just ignorant so avoid them and dont think about it.

Even if any of the things you said aren't true, you still need phycological help and you should ask for it its not wrong, trust me.
Though i thing you are telling the truth.And remember you are not to blame for anything.

[quote name='nickgio' post='2794193' date='Apr 30 2010, 01:39 AM']No child should ever go through that and know that it's not your fault that your father treats you like this.
And of course you shouldn't be blamed for any of these, trust me you've done nothing wrong.
The way your parents treat you is wrong and you dont have to go through this.

I understand your need to tell someone what you are going through and internet is an easy solution but you are still
a kid so you cant see the consicounses of this yet, but try to understand this.

Most of the things you read here aren't gonna help you and most of them are wrong.
You need help from an expert, someone you can trust and talk to and can really help you.
What you are going through now can damage you phycological state at this age.
You may feel alone now but you are not, there are people that can help you.Just trust them and talk to them.

I'm sure some kids may give you a hard time now but they are just ignorant so avoid them and dont think about it.

Even if any of the things you said aren't true, you still need phycological help and you should ask for it its not wrong, trust me.
Though i thing you are telling the truth.And remember you are not to blame for anything.[/quote]

Telling him he did nothing wrong isn't going to help either. He was being an asshole plain and clear. But youre right, he is not to blame for what his father did. These are two different things.

Don't fill his head with the pure victim bullshit. I have heard your rhyme time and time again, but that was when I was being sexually abused. That does not apply here.

[quote name='dudeonline' post='2794222' date='Apr 30 2010, 02:58 AM'][quote name='nickgio' post='2794193' date='Apr 30 2010, 01:39 AM']No child should ever go through that and know that it's not your fault that your father treats you like this.
And of course you shouldn't be blamed for any of these, trust me you've done nothing wrong.
The way your parents treat you is wrong and you dont have to go through this.

I understand your need to tell someone what you are going through and internet is an easy solution but you are still
a kid so you cant see the consicounses of this yet, but try to understand this.

Most of the things you read here aren't gonna help you and most of them are wrong.
You need help from an expert, someone you can trust and talk to and can really help you.
What you are going through now can damage you phycological state at this age.
You may feel alone now but you are not, there are people that can help you.Just trust them and talk to them.

I'm sure some kids may give you a hard time now but they are just ignorant so avoid them and dont think about it.

Even if any of the things you said aren't true, you still need phycological help and you should ask for it its not wrong, trust me.
Though i thing you are telling the truth.And remember you are not to blame for anything.[/quote]

Telling him he did nothing wrong isn't going to help either. He was being an asshole plain and clear. But youre right, he is not to blame for what his father did. These are two different things.

Don't fill his head with the pure victim bullshit. I have heard your rhyme time and time again, but that was when I was being sexually abused. That does not apply here.
[/quote]

I dont know what you went through but these are not victim bullshit crap.He is still a kid even if what he did may be wrong, noone should ever blame him for that since he is still a kid and making mistakes is normal.Also even an adult wouldn't know how to react to what he is going through so how can a child would?
So saying "He was being an asshole plain and clear." is at least cruel.

No child should ever be blamed for anything.-

PS. sorry if my way of writing isn't very understandable in my native language i could give a more detailed answer.

Making mistakes is normal but I would never call my father a "fat retarded hypocrite"

[quote name='dudeonline' post='2794299' date='Apr 30 2010, 03:32 AM']Making mistakes is normal but I would never call my father a "fat retarded hypocrite"[/quote]

I'm sure everyone as a kid thought of something similar to say to his father when thought he was beeing mistreated.Of course most of us never did.
Out of respect in my case or fear in others.I can still remember how a kid thinks or reacts you should try to remember too, its nothing like an adult.
And of course we cant expect the same from everyone after all each of us has different experiances and character.

I understand what you are telling me i just dont agree that a kid should be harmed this way for a mistake he was "forced" to do.
Edit : im sure you dont too. didnt mean it this way but whatever.

And its another thing of who to blame and who to punish.
In my opinion the kid should have been punished in a correct way (like no cash for a period or grounding) to understand he was wrong but the parents are to blame for what he did in the first place.

Last edit: i hope you understand how i meant "you've done nothing wrong"

Demonbart just wants attention.

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[quote name='mthrnite' post='2794116' date='Apr 29 2010, 06:02 PM']When I was a kid (don't laugh, but I'm 46) my punishments were extremely harsh by today's standards, abuse only came into play when your dad actually punched you in the mouth. Grabbing you by the hair, wacking you on the head and yelling in your face such that you got covered in spit did not remotely qualify as abuse.[/quote]It's the way he was raised, the way my siblings (ten years older than me), and the way I was raised. Men don't like change.

Then he actually did punch me in the face, and that's when I decided that it was enough.

The shit you people get dragged into is unbelievable. Ever heard of something called VIOLENCE? That's how you stand up to idiots, your father included.

You have to be as dangerous as anybody else in this planet.

ask your neighborhood for help & ask them where can you report your father.

Your dad shouldn't have done that to you. I mean, spitting at your face? Pulling your hair? Hitting your head?
And did you notice that he was criticizing himself when he called you a bastard? Check the definition of bastard if you don't get it.
Also, go learn some kind of self-defense thing like martial arts or something. The skill will definitely come in handy when you're in a pinch.
And uhh... yeah, call the cops, this is what I call abuse.

Oh and I had a rather similar experience, when I was younger (5/6/7?). I think I pissed him off, cos my father grabbed me by the hair and I was literally floating in mid air, and he threw me hard on the bed. My mother screamed.

[quote name='Raika' post='2794775' date='Apr 30 2010, 12:57 AM']And did you notice that he was criticizing himself when he called you a bastard? Check the definition of bastard if you don't get it. [/quote]bas·tard
n.
1. A child born out of wedlock.
2. Something that is of irregular, inferior, or dubious origin.
3. Slang A person, especially one who is held to be mean or disagreeable.

Not really insulting yourself when you call your own son a bastard.

[quote name='BeatriceTheGolden' post='2794781' date='Apr 29 2010, 10:02 PM'][quote name='Raika' post='2794775' date='Apr 30 2010, 12:57 AM']And did you notice that he was criticizing himself when he called you a bastard? Check the definition of bastard if you don't get it. [/quote]bas·tard
n.
1. A child born out of wedlock.
2. Something that is of irregular, inferior, or dubious origin.
3. Slang A person, especially one who is held to be mean or disagreeable.

Not really insulting yourself when you call your own son a bastard.
[/quote]
Eh, my mother told me that bastard means that the father had sex with the mom and had the baby before marriage. D:

[quote name='Raika' post='2794783' date='Apr 30 2010, 01:04 AM'][quote name='BeatriceTheGolden' post='2794781' date='Apr 29 2010, 10:02 PM'][quote name='Raika' post='2794775' date='Apr 30 2010, 12:57 AM']And did you notice that he was criticizing himself when he called you a bastard? Check the definition of bastard if you don't get it. [/quote]bas·tard
n.
1. A child born out of wedlock.
2. Something that is of irregular, inferior, or dubious origin.
3. Slang A person, especially one who is held to be mean or disagreeable.

Not really insulting yourself when you call your own son a bastard.
[/quote]
Eh, my mother told me that bastard means that the father had sex with the mom and had the baby before marriage. D:
[/quote]
Yeah, wedlock. Why is that insulting to the father?

[quote name='BeatriceTheGolden' post='2794799' date='Apr 29 2010, 10:11 PM'][quote name='Raika' post='2794783' date='Apr 30 2010, 01:04 AM'][quote name='BeatriceTheGolden' post='2794781' date='Apr 29 2010, 10:02 PM'][quote name='Raika' post='2794775' date='Apr 30 2010, 12:57 AM']And did you notice that he was criticizing himself when he called you a bastard? Check the definition of bastard if you don't get it. [/quote]bas·tard
n.
1. A child born out of wedlock.
2. Something that is of irregular, inferior, or dubious origin.
3. Slang A person, especially one who is held to be mean or disagreeable.

Not really insulting yourself when you call your own son a bastard.
[/quote]
Eh, my mother told me that bastard means that the father had sex with the mom and had the baby before marriage. D:
[/quote]
Yeah, wedlock. Why is that insulting to the father?
[/quote]
It means that the father is a... a... no-good pimp?
He can always say "I won't be like you, you sex-craved monster, I shall get into a serious relationship and marry before having children!" to his father...
lolrandom