When I was around 5 or 6, my parents would let me sleepover (or ask his sister to take care of me -- I frankly don't remember exactly or know why anymore) and at night I'd sleep in the same bed as her very own daughter (she was about 18 or 19) -- back then I didn't know what I was doing to her and nor do I want to describe it. It's absolutely disgusting and disturbing that my cousin told me to do and somehow she didn't see anything wrong with it.
This is the first time I've ever told anyone this because I don't like very much or at all most of my distant family members as they're either (extremely, petty) rude or they've never been good people to be around. If I came out saying that my cousin made me do sexual things at such a young age I'd be probably called a liar even though I still roughly remember what happened. I think she has kids now and with her being a pedophile, the chances of her molesting her own children are alarmingly high. Plus, even though I don't connect with distant family members on Facebook, I sometimes hear she posts nonsensical B.S. like playing the victim card and wanting peace.
The person that reminded me of this, after so many years of keeping it buried, was none other than Milo Yiannopoulos (he was molested too), I truly love Milo's speeches and works he really changed my perspectives when I started watching his videos and reading his posts. Seriously, children do not know right from wrong so adults who take advantage of kids, need and should be persecuted by law so they don't do it to others.
Moreover, this did break me it made me mentally addicted to porn at a very young age and turned me on (this is unacceptable and unnatural) and I don't know if this was also the reason, I have never felt too comfortable talking to women, at least not of my own age. To add to this, my depression probably grew out of it as I recall my childhood being moderately good (I'd get to play outside, go out with friends and visit their houses). But my childhood clearly wasn't all that great, though I'll leave that other "shit-memoirs" for another time.
There. While I'm blood-related to family members that I very much despise and since I live far from them, I never come into contact with them and even if I did, I'd probably not remember (or try not to) their faces too well (except for a few). Now, what's technically connecting me to those people is solely my grandma because after she's gone, that's it. Everyone won't have a reason to visit her house their way (not to mention barely any of her sons/daughters care about her- my father, one of the brothers and one of the sisters do at least -- the third brother couldn't care less if she was already dead and the second daughter only wanted her for her bank account).
Coicidentally or not, that cousin's mother paid men with sex and made her former husband seem like he was a wife beater to everyone she knew (he wasn't -- poor guy, I'd like to see him again someday) and now, years later she still does it. It's like the saying goes "A bad tree does not yield good apples."
Life goes on and those of us who were affected need to move on or else we'll just be stuck in the past thinking about it and it's not healthy or good in any way.
This is the first time I've ever told anyone this because I don't like very much or at all most of my distant family members as they're either (extremely, petty) rude or they've never been good people to be around. If I came out saying that my cousin made me do sexual things at such a young age I'd be probably called a liar even though I still roughly remember what happened. I think she has kids now and with her being a pedophile, the chances of her molesting her own children are alarmingly high. Plus, even though I don't connect with distant family members on Facebook, I sometimes hear she posts nonsensical B.S. like playing the victim card and wanting peace.
The person that reminded me of this, after so many years of keeping it buried, was none other than Milo Yiannopoulos (he was molested too), I truly love Milo's speeches and works he really changed my perspectives when I started watching his videos and reading his posts. Seriously, children do not know right from wrong so adults who take advantage of kids, need and should be persecuted by law so they don't do it to others.
Moreover, this did break me it made me mentally addicted to porn at a very young age and turned me on (this is unacceptable and unnatural) and I don't know if this was also the reason, I have never felt too comfortable talking to women, at least not of my own age. To add to this, my depression probably grew out of it as I recall my childhood being moderately good (I'd get to play outside, go out with friends and visit their houses). But my childhood clearly wasn't all that great, though I'll leave that other "shit-memoirs" for another time.
There. While I'm blood-related to family members that I very much despise and since I live far from them, I never come into contact with them and even if I did, I'd probably not remember (or try not to) their faces too well (except for a few). Now, what's technically connecting me to those people is solely my grandma because after she's gone, that's it. Everyone won't have a reason to visit her house their way (not to mention barely any of her sons/daughters care about her- my father, one of the brothers and one of the sisters do at least -- the third brother couldn't care less if she was already dead and the second daughter only wanted her for her bank account).
Coicidentally or not, that cousin's mother paid men with sex and made her former husband seem like he was a wife beater to everyone she knew (he wasn't -- poor guy, I'd like to see him again someday) and now, years later she still does it. It's like the saying goes "A bad tree does not yield good apples."
Life goes on and those of us who were affected need to move on or else we'll just be stuck in the past thinking about it and it's not healthy or good in any way.
