exactly where i'm headed is of no real concern to me. eventually when it's my time to leave, i'd like to vanish like an insignificant bubble, and fade away from everyone's memories as well. i don't enjoy living with feelings of shame and yet the world won't end nor will humanity perish, so i keep moving forward. kind of pathetic isn't it?
This is the opposite of what you said earlier. The fact that you want to vanish like an insignificant bubble could be praiseworthy, it reveals humbleness and not egocentrism, but if said without regret and bitterness, as you do instead.
You express yourself very well, of course, but cynicism and almost desperation shines through from what you say. How come? What has happened to you? You have your whole life ahead of you. Why do you talk about "feelings of shame"?
haha you're good i appreciate it i fell back asleep because the cats woke me up at 4am
the human experience is a unique jumbled mess of feelings. happiness is fleeting, but so is everything else. i could detail every painful step along the way so you could evaluate my character, but that would be too much.
i feel like the end product of the choices i've made throughout life big or small. i am the type who obsesses over the memories, even if some may be inconsequential, i would assume anyone would rather forget. it weighs on my mind to the point of not allowing myself moments of joy even if it's right there in front of me.