i got it. I don't know exactly what was wrong, but i can tell you what i did differently this time
1. i did not have opera browser installed.
2. i used the wiibackuppatcher from djtaz's sign instead of something else i had found
3. lastly, i was burning dvd-r's at 4x, 16x, but NOT 2.5x like...
and what if i installed DVDX, (oops, there was an uninstall option), and then installed ios249?
i'm guessing that's why i cant get sw:fu to run. The wii just makes loading noises while the tv displays.. nothing!
I tried uninstalling DVDx, and reinstalling just ios249. still nothing!
help!