not sure what to do anymore...

[stanleyopar2000]

no trolling or flaming please.


I'm about at my wits end about what do anymore...maybe someone can help me...

I'm 20 years old and I have never had a job in my life..so no place wants to hire me..Michigan Works is the employment agency that has been jacking me around for months. Michigan has almost the highest unemployment, but I have the queezy feeling in my mind about being stuck here forever. My dad wants me to get a job...or quit that and start my own computer repair business...idk he is never happy

my brother is officially mentally handicapped (because of the domineering woman he married) (even though he doesn't want to admit it) and his life is a complete failure...

I dont want to be like him ...

I took networking classes at Lake Michigan College....but failed them because the material was way over my head.(encapsulation, packets, OSI MODEL, layers...

...)
..*self esteem points -10*

even though everyone who I meet (online and in real life) says I'm handsome and good looking, I've never had a real girlfriend in my life...(and I kinda would like one.)

my first date was when I was a senior in high school..and that bitch never showed up.... *wonderful memories eh?

*

the last girlfriend (and the only one) I had was for 3 weeks..and just used me for a physical relationship. nothing more. nothing less. Do Not Want.

my best friend who I have known for years looks to me as a great guy friend..and likes someone else....even though I secretly still have feelings

idk..its just everyone around me is getting what they want in life....and I'm slightly getting frustrated that my life is literally going no where.

I put in my applications...but no calls...(even ones that require zero job experience)

I'm not on any anti depressants...but when i'm feeling down..some revisiting of my childhood with a little NES nostalgia or playing a shitload of video games helps...

so why am I writing here?....because that's kinda not working anymore...

I'm a christian..but I'm starting to believe that if there was a god..he wouldn't watch me suffer through all these disappointments for so long.

I'm not really a emo or depressed type of person...but I've felt better

 

[junkerde]

ur not alone brethren, but i am 18 and have not had a job as of yet thats about it. and im goin to this video production field and goin to a school for it but i recently discovered i like music way more and i can honestly say im a proficient player in guitar (electric and acoustic) but its too late for me now....frustrating indeed. you are not alone brutha, hang in there with us. i basically lost interest in video and film now......idk wat to do either i am frustrated, i am in a pickle

 

[laurenz]

Things don't come to you, you actually have to take control yourself to get what you want. Girlfriends don't just pop up, jobs are not going to search for you. Imo if you really want to, it will. You just have to make an effort instead. From your message I can't see anything that shows you actually did any effort for anything (except for giving up on classes, which makes it a poor effort).

 

[stanleyopar2000]

Things don't come to you, you actually have to take control yourself to get what you want. Girlfriends don't just pop up, jobs are not going to search for you. Imo if you really want to, it will. You just have to make an effort instead. From your message I can't see anything that shows you actually did any effort for anything (except for giving up on classes, which makes it a poor effort).

I didn't exactly give up, the material was too difficult to understand...and I got low grades..because I didn't get it >_<

when I go out..I make efforts for opportunities..EVERY time

 

[Vulpes Abnocto]

This is a shitty time to be entering the job market.
Even highly skilled workers are having trouble finding or keeping jobs, now.
So all I can say is to look for menial jobs. Manual labor. Janitor work. The stuff that will always be needed, and can get your foot in the door.
Once you've shown people how well you can work, you're more likely to be considered for promotions to better positions.

I wish you luck.

 

[The Catboy]

I am about to be 20 myself and I am still having trouble getting a job. Hell I wasn't even able to get a job as a janitor in Walmart (although that's because the manor is a moron)
Times are hard, but it will get better in time.

 

[stanleyopar2000]

This is a shitty time to be entering the job market.
Even highly skilled workers are having trouble finding or keeping jobs, now.
So all I can say is to look for menial jobs. Manual labor. Janitor work. The stuff that will always be needed, and can get your foot in the door.
Once you've shown people how well you can work, you're more likely to be considered for promotions to better positions.

I wish you luck.

okay, I will keep that in mind...


QUOTE(A Gay Little Catboy @ Jun 18 2011, 10:55 AM) I am about to be 20 myself and I am still having trouble getting a job. Hell I wasn't even able to get a job as a janitor in Walmart (although that's because the manor is a moron)
Times are hard, but it will get better in time.

what is your take of employment agencies?...after my dad had my brothers case worker fired for being a lazy preppy bitch who didn't want to job shadow because it was "too cold"

he got a job at goodwill...sucks...but it's a job.

 

[stanleyopar2000]

BUMP -_-'

 

[Vulpes Abnocto]

We're not big fans of "bumps" around here.

But anyway, an employment agency / temp service might take a percentage of your paycheck, but a lot of temps get the opportunity to make their temporary position permanent if they can show their worth.
They can definitely help you.

 

[stanleyopar2000]

We're not big fans of "bumps" around here.

But anyway, an employment agency / temp service might take a percentage of your paycheck, but a lot of temps get the opportunity to make their temporary position permanent if they can show their worth.
They can definitely help you.

okay..so I'll continue working with them then...

 

[stanleyopar2000]

You need to leave town. You should look at joining the military. Lean a profession, see the world, and become a man. They'll train you in just about anything from linguistics to cyber security. As far as women go. Be assertive and go for it. It's sad but the bigger the dick you are the more women you get. That's all

nothing like the nice guys getting last and bad things happening to good people, and Karma being a bitch right?...

so I should become a total douschebag asshole?...because after 4 years, it seems being the person nice isn't getting it...

I know I have to get out of here...but [redacted political opinions about current war situation due to respect of possible veterans (or family members of them) on here]

 

[stanleyopar2000]

the user "00001111" sent the me most disgusting PM I've ever received.

even though he is banned..he said he will be back...

make sure that doesn't happen.

 

[Acetic Orcein]

Hello

I was actually going to head off to bed until I read this post! I'm super tired, so prepare for a wall of text and poor spelling... and poorly formatted paragraphs.

You're in a really tough situation which I think... quite a few people go through? Especially when it seems like everyone else around you appears to be having such a wonderful succesful time, and you're kind of left to rot... baah. I went through the same thing. I'm not exactly over it- I'm still studying lol, but things are ok I guess?

I think the most important thing is to think about what you want to do? If you want to study... or go straight into work. Talk to family and (close) friends. I'm assuming you still live at home? If so, definitely speak to parents, ask for advice about what they'd do. I mean... they are parents right?

Secondly, find out what resources are available to you, and abuse the heck out of them! I'm not sure what the job system is like, but if you have any careers services that can help you with applications/resumes. Failing that, if you have anyone that can read through your resumes... applications that would be a very good idea.

It also requires a pro-active approach. It's WAY too easy to go into that downward spiral where... you do try really hard from the beginning to apply for jobs, but when you get so many rejections or people don't bother ringing you back, you lose a bit of self esteem. To avoid this, it's really important that you just keep going, but again you MUST be proactive. If people don't call you back, ring them up and (politely) ask what you could improve upon. You're likely to get real awful people, who'll just brush you off or not give you anything useful. However, you can tell yourself that you tried your best with regards to that particular job, and move on to the next. I think it'll help to develop your confidence too.

I think it's a tough situation for you since you've not had a previous job, so I think it may be worth seeing if you can get voluntary experience to pad out your applications. It'll keep you occupied in the meantime, while making you a more attractive employee. The job market is particularly awful atm anyway...

With regards to a girlfriend, I'm not sure what advice I can give. Maybe just being 'out there' more? I'm thinking it'll happen when it happens, trying to force it perhaps isn't the best thing. You WILL find someone. For now, I think you should aim to feel happy within yourself. You seem like a good person

It's easy for people to be really harsh and say 'grow up, go out and seize the opportunities'. But this isn't easy for everyone! You're only human, and it's natural to feel down! It's a certainly a wearying situation. It's just... really important that you do try your best, and you have to be honest with yourself. As long as you can say that you tried your best, then you have nothing to be ashamed of. Just keep at it. You will get there in the end.

 

[stanleyopar2000]

Hello

I was actually going to head off to bed until I read this post! I'm super tired, so prepare for a wall of text and poor spelling... and poorly formatted paragraphs.

You're in a really tough situation which I think... quite a few people go through? Especially when it seems like everyone else around you appears to be having such a wonderful succesful time, and you're kind of left to rot... baah. I went through the same thing. I'm not exactly over it- I'm still studying lol, but things are ok I guess?

I think the most important thing is to think about what you want to do? If you want to study... or go straight into work. Talk to family and (close) friends. I'm assuming you still live at home? If so, definitely speak to parents, ask for advice about what they'd do. I mean... they are parents right?

Secondly, find out what resources are available to you, and abuse the heck out of them! I'm not sure what the job system is like, but if you have any careers services that can help you with applications/resumes. Failing that, if you have anyone that can read through your resumes... applications that would be a very good idea.

It also requires a pro-active approach. It's WAY too easy to go into that downward spiral where... you do try really hard from the beginning to apply for jobs, but when you get so many rejections or people don't bother ringing you back, you lose a bit of self esteem. To avoid this, it's really important that you just keep going, but again you MUST be proactive. If people don't call you back, ring them up and (politely) ask what you could improve upon. You're likely to get real awful people, who'll just brush you off or not give you anything useful. However, you can tell yourself that you tried your best with regards to that particular job, and move on to the next. I think it'll help to develop your confidence too.

I think it's a tough situation for you since you've not had a previous job, so I think it may be worth seeing if you can get voluntary experience to pad out your applications. It'll keep you occupied in the meantime, while making you a more attractive employee. The job market is particularly awful atm anyway...

With regards to a girlfriend, I'm not sure what advice I can give. Maybe just being 'out there' more? I'm thinking it'll happen when it happens, trying to force it perhaps isn't the best thing. You WILL find someone. For now, I think you should aim to feel happy within yourself. You seem like a good person

It's easy for people to be really harsh and say 'grow up, go out and seize the opportunities'. But this isn't easy for everyone! You're only human, and it's natural to feel down! It's a certainly a wearying situation. It's just... really important that you do try your best, and you have to be honest with yourself. As long as you can say that you tried your best, then you have nothing to be ashamed of. Just keep at it. You will get there in the end.

JUST the type of advice and the post I was looking for!!!!!

at least there is some decent people here..

I feel much better knowing I'm not the only one going through this. My parents said I should get a job and go back to college...but I'm not sure what I want to do yet...I know for a fact it's not networking. I'm going through Michigan works...but like I said before..they are jacking me around like they did my brother. So if I go for an interview or even they don't call me back. ask them what I could have done to improve myself. Even though I won't get the job, JUST to raise my self esteem right? And Volunteer different places....might even meet someone in the process right?

even though someone said the bigger dick you are the more women you will get, I should ignore that and be me right? Because I am a very nice person

like I said before I appreciate you being so considerate despite being super tired, and I will definitely take your advice what you said

 

[Acetic Orcein]

JUST the type of advice and the post I was looking for!!!!!

at least there is some decent people here..

I feel much better knowing I'm not the only one going through this. My parents said I should get a job and go back to college...but I'm not sure what I want to do yet...I know for a fact it's not networking. I'm going through Michigan works...but like I said before..they are jacking me around like they did my brother. So if I go for an interview or even they don't call me back. ask them what I could have done to improve myself. Even though I won't get the job, JUST to raise my self esteem right? And Volunteer different places....might even meet someone in the process right?

even though someone said the bigger dick you are the more women you will get, I should ignore that and be me right? Because I am a very nice person

like I said before I appreciate you being so considerate despite being super tired, and I will definitely take your advice what you said

Hehe definitely! Keep being who you are, just aim to develop your confidence and stuff. There are far too many d*cks in the world anyway, so keep being a nice person! It's who you are!

And yep, chances are you'll meet lots of new people doing voluntary stuff, so who knows? I'm glad to see you've already been trying hard, so just keep it up.