True Love How to show it?

[p1ngpong]

If you need lube there seems to be something wrong.

Wow what an incredibly unloving thing to say!

 

[Creamu]

Wow what an incredibly unloving thing to say!

It was meant as a gesture of empathy. If your reproductive organs are desert dry maybe rehydrating can help.

 

[The Catboy]

I call my wife gay

 

[Creamu]

I call my wife gay

Why?

 

[choog]

Try to understand their needs and desires.
Explain to them how important their happiness and safety is to you.

 

[The Catboy]

Why?

There’s no reason other than that just being our love language.

 

[Shape]

I see. Maybe to show true love means to be engaged in an eternal struggle. It torments my mind to know that I can not sufficently communicate others and prove to them how much I love them.

It's not an eternal struggle. Honestly, if you truly love the person it probably won't feel like a struggle at all-- if you're frustrated that someone can't hear you love them or that they don't love you back, then that isn't true love. Plain and simple. If it's true love then you will care about them enough to value their free will and your love, happiness and emotional state will not be/feel contingent on their reactions to your feelings. It's easy to love someone-- especially when the love is true-- but it isn't easy to show it nor to receive love from another person. These are things that you have to learn and also things that are difficult to teach.

If you love someone then figure out how to show it in a healthy way. Figure out what ways, if any, the person you love will receive this communication-- this is their "love language". If you cannot figure out a way then you will have to wait patiently until they have grown and developed enough as a person to receive and give love in a healthy way. If they have grown and developed and hear your love, yet don't love you back, then you should value their free will. It may be disappointing, but if your reaction is "WHAT A BI!@#" or to desperately try to "win" their love, then you are not feeling true love. You are feeling extreme attraction/infatuation plus jealousy and envy at the hypothetical significant other they may one day have because it's not you. And that's just childish.

If you cannot express your love in a healthy way then it is wise to forgo expressing that love until you yourself have developed more as a person as well. Do no harm and all that jazz.

 

[Creamu]

It's not an eternal struggle. Honestly, if you truly love the person it probably won't feel like a struggle at all-- if you're frustrated that someone can't hear you love them or that they don't love you back, then that isn't true love. Plain and simple.

Tough love, borther/sister/xerster.

If it's true love then you will care about them enough to value their free will

What do you mean with free will?

and your love, happiness and emotional state will not be/feel contingent on their reactions to your feelings. It's easy to love someone-- especially when the love is true-- but it isn't easy to show it nor to receive love from another person. These are things that you have to learn and also things that are difficult to teach.

Oh.... So what you are saying if some has a little love for a big dream it might not be apparent?

If you love someone then figure out how to show it in a healthy way. Figure out what ways, if any, the person you love will receive this communication-- this is their "love language". If you cannot figure out a way then you will have to wait patiently until they have grown and developed enough as a person to receive and give love in a healthy way.

Okay I will be patient.

If they have grown and developed and hear your love, yet don't love you back, then you should value their free will. It may be disappointing, but if your reaction is "WHAT A BI!@#" or to desperately try to "win" their love, then you are not feeling true love. You are feeling extreme attraction/infatuation plus jealousy and envy at the hypothetical significant other they may one day have because it's not you. And that's just childish.

I agree.

If you cannot express your love in a healthy way then it is wise to forgo expressing that love until you yourself have developed more as a person as well. Do no harm and all that jazz.

I want to bring good to the world, it is my big dream.

 

[Shape]

Tough love, borther/sister/xerster.

What do you mean with free will?

Basically, everyone has a right to feel how they feel and everyone has a right to select their own actions. Taking actions to manipulate someone's actions is devaluing and disrespecting someone else's free will. The impulse to manipulate this free will in another is not an impulse from a love emotion and does not stem from a desire to foster another individual's personal growth.

If your love is true, you'll be OK with waiting, or even with the prospect that the other will never love you back. That prospect can be a little disappointing but, in the case of unconditional love, you can generally bounce back a lot quicker-- you won't be stuck to your bed crying, basically. Because you just want the best for them and for you.

Conditional love is a struggle, and that is not true love. It feels eternal but it is not, as well. A lot of people base their relationships on conditional love and many, many even believe unconditional love does not exist. Don't make that mistake, conditional love is basically never forever love. And that is the kind of love that will stick you to your bed for a month when it breaks down!

NOW, the real real struggle is unconditionally loving someone who DOES love you back, but their love is conditional. Because that's the kind of person to tank your bank account into the negatives and just do generally unhealthy stuff- and then you'll have to break up with them for both of your own goods. Which will suck because the love is unconditional.


The TL;DR? You're worrying too much. Just focus on having and finding friends first and the rest will almost surely fall into place one day-- and if that doesn't work, use the internet or a dating app. And, of course, remember to love yourself and learn to recognize when you are not being treated or loved in a healthy way!

 

[Creamu]

Basically, everyone has a right to feel how they feel and everyone has a right to select their own actions. Taking actions to manipulate someone's actions is devaluing and disrespecting someone else's free will. The impulse to manipulate this free will in another is not an impulse from a love emotion and does not stem from a desire to foster another individual's personal growth.

If your love is true, you'll be OK with waiting, or even with the prospect that the other will never love you back. That prospect can be a little disappointing but, in the case of unconditional love, you can generally bounce back a lot quicker-- you won't be stuck to your bed crying, basically. Because you just want the best for them and for you.

Conditional love is a struggle, and that is not true love. It feels eternal but it is not, as well. A lot of people base their relationships on conditional love and many, many even believe unconditional love does not exist. Don't make that mistake, conditional love is basically never forever love. And that is the kind of love that will stick you to your bed for a month when it breaks down!

So you are fanatical about. It is good to know that you have a little love for a big dream with that fanatical approach much can be accomplished.

NOW, the real real struggle is unconditionally loving someone who DOES love you back, but their love is conditional. Because that's the kind of person to tank your bank account into the negatives and just do generally unhealthy stuff- and then you'll have to break up with them for both of your own goods. Which will suck because the love is unconditional.

For me it is important that love implies that big dreams get supported.

The TL;DR? You're worrying too much. Just focus on having and finding friends first and the rest will almost surely fall into place one day-- and if that doesn't work, use the internet or a dating app. And, of course, remember to love yourself and learn to recognize when you are not being treated or loved in a healthy way!

That is a good point. Do you think it is fair to demand at least a little love from others?

 

[Shape]

That is a good point. Do you think it is fair to demand at least a little love from others?

Yeah, if they don't show me at least a little love then why are they even a part of my personal life?

 

[Creamu]

Yeah, if they don't show me at least a little love then why are they even a part of my personal life?

I agree. To me if you can have any love for me and my big dream you are not a a friend a fellow Creamer. I think that love is the foundation, the stuff of which dreams are made of. It is the basis of life. If you are not loving you are in a way dying. You are a souless creature without dreams. That might sound harsh but that is just how I feel, sorry. Sorry, not sorry. Love is the basis for bringing good children to this world and that is essential. I have love for nature, all the little creatures and also the big ones like lions. Therefore I also have a big dream and I hope to accomplish it.

 

[Flame]

You dont.

you keep in buried in your deepest darkest place.

 

[Creamu]

You dont.

you keep in buried in your deepest darkest place.

How to accomplish big dreams then?

 

[Flame]

How to accomplish big dreams then?

not smoke emf will be a good start.