Too much stuff happening, So stressed...

[NeSchn]

Slow down bro, dont go quitting the band just yet.

Honestly reading your last response got me thinking, do you feel the same way say, before an exam? Or on the eve of having to hand in a piece of work at school, while your rushing through the night trying to finish it? Do you see what Im hinting at here? If you think to yourself "I dont need to sit this exam, its been cancelled" dont you get the same feeling of relief?

It sounds to me like maybe your experiencing the type of anxiety that everybody feels before a big event in their life. Of course you would feel better knowing you dont have to do it. Think carefully about the real reasons your thinking of quitting now, just be honest with yourself.

In your heart do you really want to quit the band? Or are you just too stressed thinking about the tour you feel quitting is the best option to end the anxiety?

Its called the fight or flight response, thats what your going through right now, dont be too hasty making any decisions you will regret.

Hmmm, Yeah I see where you are coming from. I think I just need to sit and think for a couple days. I think my decision is basically done but I got you. I just need to think about it some more, If I am going to quit I just want to at least give them enough time to find another drummer so they can go on with the tour. I think by the end of the month my decision will be made.

Thanks p1ngy, You made me think a lot about this. Now this is all I am going to be thinking about for the next month, but I think I really do need to put more thought into it.

 

[p1ngpong]

Im glad I got you thinking more about it bro, its a big decision your going to make.

You should share your thoughts and how you feel with the rest of the band, as soon as you can. You need to discuss it with them, Im sure they will be supportive, if they didnt believe in you they wouldnt have organised the tour in the first place. Dont go making the mistake of just thinking your alone on this, on tour you wont be on your own, you will be with them, you will all be together. Talking about this with your bandmates could relieve your anxiety more then any advice we give you here, more then you could imagine even.

Bottling this up, just sitting on your own thinking about it for a month could make things worse. It could stress you out more then you are now. Talk with the rest of the band, and just be honest about your feelings and doubts.

Theres no shame in being honest with them.

 

[NeSchn]

Im glad I got you thinking more about it bro, its a big decision your going to make.

You should share your thoughts and how you feel with the rest of the band, as soon as you can. You need to discuss it with them, Im sure they will be supportive, if they didnt believe in you they wouldnt have organised the tour in the first place. Dont go making the mistake of just thinking your alone on this, on tour you wont be on your own, you will be with them, you will all be together. Talking about this with your bandmates could relieve your anxiety more then any advice we give you here, more then you could imagine even.

Bottling this up, just sitting on your own thinking about it for a month could make things worse. It could stress you out more then you are now. Talk with the rest of the band, and just be honest about your feelings and doubts.

Theres no shame in being honest with them.

Hmm yeah. I guess your right, but there is one thing about Kyle. He can be really stuck up, he doesn't give much help. If I told him about he would probably be like "Dude, I don't see anything wrong, why don't you want to do it? What the fuck?" I guess he just doesn't get it. It sucks because he is like the band leader, but yeah I guess I should take it up with them. However, I still do think my time is ending soon with them but I do want to try to stay if I can. I think this because if I am already almost on the brink of leaving I don't think I can heal from it. But yet, Its still a little too early to come to conclusions yet.

Thanks man.

 

[Densetsu]

Sorry, I haven't read all of the other responses, so I might be repeating something that's already been said.

Just based on your posts, you're young (damn you're young!), and although I've never heard you perform, I'm going to go out on a limb and assume that you're a pretty talented drummer (since you've been playing for 8 years). If music is your passion, like you say it is, then I'm sure you won't stop thinking about music.

That all said, I'll have to say just go with what your heart is telling you man. If you're not feeling it, then it's not time for you to go on tour yet. As young, talented and passionate as you are about music, you still have plenty of time ahead of you to do everything you want. You just need to know the difference between passing up an opportunity that will come again later, and letting the chance of a lifetime slip past you.

Just don't fall into the trap of passing up every opportunity that passes you by, because before you know it, your youth will have gone and you'll wonder where all those years went. The bird has to learn how to fly out of the nest sometime in its life. There's always a first time and you will always have doubts and misgivings, but that's part of the adventure.

Friends are important, and if they're truly your friends they would empathize with what you're feeling. They would pat your back and say "don't sweat it man, there's always next time

"

So tell your friends how you're feeling, and if your heart's not in it right now, tell them you just need more time to build up confidence and EXP points by doing a few more gigs with them before you go all-out on tour. If they can't understand that, they're douches.

 

[NeSchn]

Thanks Densetsu I hear where you are coming from too, And I am starting to come up with what to say.

I am thinking just to tell them that I am not going on the tour. Give them the reasons that I gave you guys flat out, and then have them talk. I still want to be in the band, but as I said throughout the whole thing something is just telling me not to go. Just so the whole thing isn't on me though, I will tell them that and have them talk so I am not the one with the huge burden on my shoulders.

This is only from taking a shit though and thinking about it (XD) I still need to think more about it. Maybe when I go to bed tonight I will have a dream that will make me realize what to fully do.

 

[Densetsu]

This is only from taking a shit though and thinking about it (XD) I still need to think more about it. Maybe when I go to bed tonight I will have a dream that will make me realize what to fully do.

I've had some of my greatest epiphanies while sitting on the can

 

[NeSchn]

This is only from taking a shit though and thinking about it (XD) I still need to think more about it. Maybe when I go to bed tonight I will have a dream that will make me realize what to fully do.

I've had some of my greatest epiphanies while sitting on the can

XD, There was nothing else to do. I have read all the Harry Potters I have and my brother is using my DS to play Order of Ecclesia.

Anyways, Here is a video of playing:


It was a Halloween show, that was definately the best show we ever had.

 

[p1ngpong]

This is only from taking a shit though and thinking about it (XD) I still need to think more about it. Maybe when I go to bed tonight I will have a dream that will make me realize what to fully do.

I've had some of my greatest epiphanies while sitting on the can

XD, There was nothing else to do. I have read all the Harry Potters I have and my brother is using my DS to play Order of Ecclesia.

Anyways, Here is a video of playing:


It was a Halloween show, that was definately the best show we ever had.

Nice video, I shall listen to it on the toilet always!

 

[NeSchn]

So, I talked to Kyle today for about a half hour and he catches my drift. He basically told me that he understands where I am coming from and said that he would respect my ultimate decision because he doesn't not want to play music with out me. He said that he knows that I want to wait until I am a bit older (out of highschool) but says that this is a good experience. Anyways, It all went over pretty well, but I am still very confused about this all.