I think I'm becoming an incel

@SG854 yeah, I get your point regarding the value as a "study case", not as the "manifesto" it pretends to be.

Having not read the document and my understanding of the concept, prominent works and analysis of notions common within the "movement" coming from what I hope are objective sources (and given their efforts in other areas I do know being OK I am willing to take the "risk") I would say it is not a good plan.

That said I shall first ask what your understanding of things here is as I see two broad categories.

1) Wherein one has had sex and relationships hyped up by popular culture (albeit rather coyly if you are in the US) and you then contemplate whether all the effort is worth it. A position of indifference or neutrality (if it happens I might roll with it, otherwise I shall not seek sort of thing) then being adopted.

2) The full bore stuff covered in some of things I spoke of in the opening line wherein people are demeaned, the individual agency of people being curtailed (or it is considered justified) and you get things like the demands for single mothers (or maybe just those in receipt of benefits) to be forced by the law/government to go sleep with people.

1) is fine. 2) by virtue alone of it serving to reduce the individual freedoms of others in such manners in its model is horrific to me. I would have said incel itself all but means 2) but I am wary of asserting that too hard. While I categorically have no respect for the mindset and model I do at least have some empathy for things that led them there to begin with. If nothing else nobody owes you anything, though basic civility if you are showing it yourself can be expected.

More on 1). Said collision of culture, hormones and perhaps a weak understanding of how much sex people are having serves rather well to cause mental... maybe not stress but dissonance. You then feeling compelled to spend your meagre funds and time preening and whatnot rather than having something in your pocket for some sweets, games, other hobbies and fun stuff when out with friends, and maybe even seeing no results from that, can be rather disheartening. There is an argument that whatever you don't learn now you have to learn in however many years if you do go in for it but it is a weak one, and indeed one having a sister or similar aged female in your life probably does more for that one than buying a leather jacket, silly designer baseball cap and taking a 14 year old girl to a malt shop before realising that you enjoy none of the same cultural artefacts and thus have little to talk about beyond school and any pets you might have.

An interesting video at this point, not one of the ones I spoke of earlier but similar circles

@sarkwalvein I've been hooked recently on The Infographics Show videos about serial killers Here. And i've been on a serial killer videos binge watching.

Yay FAST6191 with his detailed posts ending with his trademark video finisher.

Is that a trademark/identifying characteristic for me now?

I am never quite sure about what to do if I want to get a message across.

When trying to teach ROM hacking or something I constantly have people ask for videos (this despite video being inherently unsuited for it as far as I am concerned). Other times when I post videos that illustrate in about the same amount of time as it would likely take to read something I can people saying I don't want to watch a video. At the same time drive by video posting feels terribly lazy. Other times still I find many responses to be simplistic and lacking nuance or consideration for the greater position of things, and I dislike doing that to other people in the same way I dislike having it happen to me if looking for information on things. To that end I go for split the difference, and maybe use a video as a deeper follow up, alternate take, or (hopefully) humorous illustration of a concept covered in the text part.

While I don't necessarily mind speaking to myself, the amount of times I have been told I am hard to read then meaning it likely happens on a regular basis and goes unsaid, I know of no better way. This goes double in the case of the human mind, something nobody could reasonably describe as simplistic and lacking nuance.

Anyway this is getting very off topic and I already covered most of what I would say. I had a go at reading the manifesto but found it rather dry and I don't know if the rationales provided are just alien to me or post hoc nonsense. Guy seems to have an astoundingly good memory though, else he had the reference of a diary or something -- most people accord me a good memory and I can indeed remember most conversations I have but no way I could reconstruct my life in that much detail.

what does ''incel'' means, i looked it on google but i didn't find a soddisfy answer...

Like others have said, you technically don't choose to be an incel (hence the involuntary part of the portmanteau). If you decide to swear off dating and pursuing sex, I guess that would make you a volcel. However, like vinscool said, if you're only 14, it's way too early to even think about things like that. What you need to do is focus on school first and friends second, and if you end up finding a girlfriend/boyfriend (I try not to assume here lol) in that, then good, but don't make it your sole focus. Try talking to someone you have some common ground with, and as you become better friends, you'll start to notice little things about them that you nver noticed before that make them more attractive, and of you're lucky the feeling will be mutual. The eternal friend zone thing is a myth in my experience. I guess my advice for the future is don't go solely on first impressions, and don't limit yourself to a specific subset. Many adult men and women do this. Things like "I only date black men" or guys who only pursue blonde bimbos with big tits and ungodly amounts of make-up. Both wonder where all the good men/women are at while being pursued by plenty of good candidates.

@leon315
You really didn't look very hard, the first link literally gave you the best answer
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Incel
Incel means "involuntary celibates," which is a subculture of mostly men who blame literally everyone and everything on the fact that they can't get laid. They view women as sex objects only there to please them and blame attrative people for the fact that women won't have sex with them. Basically they are living embodiment of a dumpster fire that happens to be a rapist.

@Lilith Valentine i saw the explanation on wiki, i just need a further confirmation about what i see, cauz i can't believe that here is a temper like Elliot Rodger is among us....

Anyway if tc choose to talk us about his thoughts, is because he's afraid of becoming a potential social theat? Is that means he's seeking help from us??

i.e. self victimizing losers that are in denial that they are what they made themselves into, they are not entitled and don't deserve anything they don't have, they are not the special persons or geniuses they think they are (i.e. god complex), and they refuse to acknowledge it's on their hands to change and their responsibility to become somebody.

The word incel is a portmanteau of involuntary celibate. For some it stops there but recent times have catapulted the term to more common discussion and there are various things some look to.

Involuntary in this case means not by choice. Celibate then being the term for one what goes without sex (and possibly romantic relationships). Voluntary celibacy has a long and documented history (various religions, various people doing it for health, job, educational reasons) and in some cases is lauded, indifference would be where I fall here and possibly quite silly in the case of religions but that is another matter.

The involuntary part can stem from many things. Classically it would be common among physically and mentally disabled people, the socially isolated and so forth. At the same time social isolation is a very common problem in the modern world at all sorts of ages in otherwise "normal" people from young teenagers all the way up. Such things do rather tend to limit your chances of engaging in such things -- leave school with normal qualifications and you win a dead end job somewhere which in turn can rather limit socialisation options (clubs are expensive and frequently awful places), never mind trying to do the relationship lark.

The internet however is a wonderful tool and you may well find people in similar positions to yourself.

This is where it gets tricky and things get blurry. What some might call a dry spell or normal life* others categorise (or categorise for themselves) as failures and others still look instead to the societal/social systems in place**. Some fairly intense emotions get involved here (jealousy, or perhaps more accurately envy, feelings of being out of place, feelings of being a failure, in the case of the systems stuff then betrayal by society).
Whether it is a term one can only self identify as or be called is up for debate but more wants to be discussed before we broach that properly.

*most 18 year olds have not had threesomes and sampled all the colours of the rainbow, yet if you dip into popular culture you might be forgiven for thinking it so. Said popular culture does also place a fairly high emphasis on relationships and sexuality. Rates of sexual activity I could look up but suffice it to say far lower than many imagine them to be.

**while I can find myself nowhere near some of the excesses to be covered shortly I can very much see modern society being a hard place if you have had the whinier aspects of all that rape culture/toxic masculinity/[insert long list of related terms] bollocks drilled into you for many years without a chance to see/grasp how the world actually works (by the way the proponents of said list of terms commonly view such people with utter contempt and frequently deride them, indeed I think I first heard the term as a slur coming from one of them). Coming the other way there are other things in society that make it hard -- divorce law, especially in the US, seems aimed at causing more problems than resolving things. Consider that what you and I might have been laughing at for maybe the last 10 or so years (and easily certainly 5 or so) could well have been someone's entire "school now means something" career.

So anyway extremely isolated and disaffected people*** get together, and as blaming anybody or anything but yourself is common then it can get pretty toxic, especially when combined with the already rejecting society at various levels, and thus we arrive at the current public perception portion of this exploration. While it had been bubbling along for years it was all thrust to the fore when the writer of the manifesto mentioned at the start decided to do the somewhat random killing spree bit. He is not responsible for all that you see on the subject but for some he is a prominent figure. Anyway now we have a "movement" because all such things must be a movement nowadays, complete with its own terms, lines of logic and such like. It is not terribly cohesive from what I can tell but most "movements" are nebulous these days so I am used to that.
Video because why not at this point

That video I linked on the previous page I will also throw in again.

***most commonly males, certainly if you look at the way it is characterised. However there are no small number of women, typically ones pushing 30 and slightly beyond that, frequently professional but not always, that seem to be struggling to find a partner and being rather unhappy about it (do a search for "where are all the good men" and you might well see the mirror/female version of a lot of this stuff, often from very big and respected sources).

Now I am back to pondering whether it is something to be identified as, only self identify as or possibly some variation ("while you may reject the label the views you hold align extraordinarily well with and you have not said anything that would fundamentally oppose them either" sort of thing) and I don't know. It could be that it was a once useful term that has been co-opted (it has many of the hallmarks), or it could be a self chosen thing. There are all sorts of related terms and concepts (MRA, PUA, MGTOW, nice guy syndrome...) that could be covered, many far older and more well known than all this, but I will leave that for now.

@FAST6191 i think at point we don't need any detailed explanation about ''incel'', i think at the point here all people understand it, and thing is enough clear: Tc is becoming a dangerous incel like Elliot Rodger and mighty committed a mass murder on gbatemp across all mods! all potential incels seem post a last massage on social media(gbatemp??) before get into action, so is this blog as TC's final massage?

After listening to 7 and a half hours of Elliot's manifesto (lost interest and never came back to finish the remaning 2) I can safely conclude that incels don't exist. Looks are only half of it, women aren't going to be drawn to some who is both ugly (you often perceive yourself as more ugly than you acctually are) and appears weak. You need to act confident in your actions.

Incel, the extreme version of "friendzone". Seriously, it's just a stupid thing blaming others. It's like freaking nazism blaming the jews for X and Y.
Also checking your profile, you're 14? What the hell man, you don't know what you need yet. Hormones fucking sucks, being 14 fucking sucks, and generally being a teenager fucking sucks.

Incels are a cancer and should be removed, there is nothing to protect and yes. The test sometried that women goes for looks rather than profiles, can be faked. Work on yourself and dude, you're 14. Your body will start to change a lot when you reach 16-17.

If that is your understanding, much less using the wikipedia version if it is still like the video I linked before (all the references being debatable at best and commonly from sources with vested interests), then we risk a misunderstanding and I shall continue.

Similarly I did not see the OP as becoming like that. The questioning of what counts or do I become one and other phrasing, to say nothing of the lack of anything hinting at them "deserving" whatever, made it seem like 1) in my initial reply to the thread (wherein one just decides this teenage/general relationship lark is not worth the hassle to actively pursue, presumably then with the knowledge that such things don't tend to drop into your lap).

Schoo-age relationships are all but completely useless. At the most it's rudimentary practice for the real thing later down the line. Some would argue those aren't worth it either.

Just don't, it's not another person's fault that they don't like you, it's (either voluntarily or not) yours.

You might want to look in the mirror and work on your self if girls are not giving you the time of day. Might just be you.

You're 14 dude, chill out and make the most out of your free time while you still have it. Worry about girls later, from what I hear thats all you're gonna be doing in a few years haha.

Yeah, you are 14. It's normal to don't know what to do or want. You need to know more people. Get out of your comfort zone and enjoy life. If someone did something bad to you, get used to it. But never become part of it. Easier said than done, but, anything that justifies hateful or vengeance will do harm u in the end. Can't say you never do bad stuff, but, possibly your environment has led you to do that. Get out of that.

Also you must know girls and how they behave between males before you take your stuff too personal. Think of the animal kingdom. Such is life. But that does not excuse you for harming them (unless the bitch cheated you, in which case you can cheat her back or take some action seeing you behaved well), but I think you are too young for that. Let life do its thing and move on.