I have nothing against you or that American POW (infact I 100% agree), but I find it a bit humourous that you're talking about it with the name "WeedZ" (only commenting here since this is very off topic)
I took a look at the rail and noticed that the two last pins were soldered for some reason, luckly I still had the rail of my broken joycon so after I swapped them I was able to use it attached to the console