You know, I want to be a Monkat, too.

Discussion in 'The Edge of the Forum' started by monkat, Jan 20, 2011.

  1. monkat
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    monkat I'd like to see you TRY to ban me. (Should I try?.

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    SO, like so many of us at GBAtemp, I've mused to myself;
    "I'd be a great Monkat! Just how does one become a monkat?"

    Fortunately, a newcomer was willing to pose this question in the regular forum.

    Answers began to pour in from all corners of the globe, regarding the best method with which to become a monkat.

    Most of these methods seemed to revolve around sexual favors....specifically analingus....so I was at a loss. I mean, even Resident Evil's licker creatures don't have a tongue long enough to perform fellatic favors across the Atlantic Ocean.

    So I did what seemed to be the next-best thing, and sent close-up photos of my genitalia to all of the staff.

    Needless to say, there were.....mixed results.

    Monkat was kind enough to respond immediately to my query, saying that my little friend was not "biomechanical" enough.
    ....So I got myself one of those special pumps...you know, from Sweden...and tried it again.
    Still not good enough, he says.

    Darn...

    BUT! There are many other monkats who might be impressed!

    Unfortunately Monkat was not one of them. He was apparently too engrossed in writing a game review of Custer's Revenge on the Atari 2600.

    Maybe I should have had the photo rendered in 8-bit graphics...

    Monkat was the next respondent; he promptly moved my message into a more appropriate folder... and then began to stalk me.

    (One point for me!.....I think.....)

    Monkat simply wasn't interested in my Wii....something about not having infrared emitters made it nothing more than an ordinary joystick...

    Monkat made a log of the unscheduled release and told me to close that topic.

    Monkat was actually rather complimentary, saying that he was impressed that my fella was thinner than the DSi.

    Monkat said it was completely incompatible with his adapter.

    Monkat was unimpressed by the decided lack of firmware.

    And Monkat said my homebrew had a few bugs on it.

    Monkat responded that this was getting to know a 'Temper just a little bit too well.

    Monkat made people think I was a girl.

    Monkat's answer was slightly cryptic; telling me to engage my Number One in my own Number Two....whatever that means.

    Monkat also responded, saying that I was kupoed-up kupo and I deserved to be kupoed by a kupo-kupo.
    ....so then I asked him for the cheat code to become a mod.
    No response....maybe he's still working on it.

    I dunno, maybe I'm not cut out for monkatship...

    ...I think I'll just go throw myself off the Edge of the Forum.
     
  2. TrolleyDave

    TrolleyDave Philosolosophising

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  3. ineap09

    ineap09 GBAtemp Regular

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  4. Vulpes Abnocto

    Vulpes Abnocto Drinks, Knows Things

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    I've been using horse tail & mane shampoo on my beard, chest, pubic, and asscrack hair in the hopes of being a monkat one day.

    [​IMG]
     
  5. ineap09

    ineap09 GBAtemp Regular

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    [​IMG]
     
  6. monkat
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    monkat I'd like to see you TRY to ban me. (Should I try?.

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    This comment makes this whole thread worthwhile. [​IMG]

    Also, horse shampoo is designed to be very gentle and leaving your skin and hair soft.

    I suppose I should take it as more of a compliment than anyting else :wtf:
     
  7. Elvarg

    Elvarg Zyzz™

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    >>>>>>
    you must have alot of spare time
     
  8. SkankyYankee

    SkankyYankee GBAtemp Advanced Skank

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    Custer's revenge shout out!

    +1 for 8 bit wangs
     
  9. BoxShot

    BoxShot Chiyo-chan :3

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    I don't give a shit.
     
  10. Schizoanalysis

    Schizoanalysis From somewhere inside the rabbit hole...

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    I've been spamming pictures of my nipples all around the internet in the hope of, one day, becoming a monkat...
     
  11. Sterling

    Sterling GBAtemp's Silver Hero

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    He doesn't.
     
  12. shlong

    shlong in memoriam of gravitas

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    Charlotte's maze
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  13. Westside

    Westside Sogdiana

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    LMAO, I wonder what would happen if someone actually tried this.
     
  14. ineap09

    ineap09 GBAtemp Regular

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    Well I use horse tail & mane shampoo on my head hair...and when I wash it out it pretty much reaches every other area. Does that count?
     
  15. monkat
    OP

    monkat I'd like to see you TRY to ban me. (Should I try?.

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    Yes.


    And from the comments here, I guess a lot of you don't realize that this is just a copypasta'd version of Vulpe's thread with a few name changes...
     
  16. ineap09

    ineap09 GBAtemp Regular

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    OMG! You mean I'm going to be a monkat one day?! [​IMG]


    ...Vulpe's thread? *can only think of some sort of beard off, and some sort of giant mutant turkeys reeking havoc in 2012* [​IMG]

    EDIT: And then suddenly the very two topics I mentioned pop up to the front of EoF. Hmm... [​IMG]
     
  17. Vulpes Abnocto

    Vulpes Abnocto Drinks, Knows Things

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  18. Evo.lve

    Evo.lve All that you could be.

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    Away from you.
    You forgot the description, "Let's all be Monkats!"