Wii HAS no hardware...

Discussion in 'The Edge of the Forum' started by Linkiboy, Jul 3, 2007.

  1. Linkiboy
    OP

    Linkiboy GBAtemp Testing Area

    Member
    4,888
    37
    May 14, 2006
    United States
    A follow up to my post guys!

    http://gbatemp.net/index.php?showtopic=54468

    Anyways, eager to finally found out about the hardware in the Nintendo Wii, I opened up the case and was excited to see the different chips and all. The problem was there were no chips in there.

    The things powering Wii are small gnomes and a couple of hamsters. And you know what the graphics on the Wii games are too? Well, the gnomes dress up to the different characters in the game and cosplay in front of backgrounds on cardboard paper inside the Wii. It's all happening in real time. Every time a player moves the Wiimote or presses a button, a probe inserted in the gnome's rectum sends an electrical shock to the gnome to inform it what it should do. I also found out that the Wiimote is made of Mortadella cheese. It tastes pretty well. Now this is something Playstation 3 and Xbox 360 has not. Wii rocks!
     


  2. Destructobot

    Destructobot Crave the Hammer

    Member
    5,005
    5
    Oct 15, 2006
    United States
    Portland, OR
    Are the hamsters bigger than the gnomes?
     
  3. Linkiboy
    OP

    Linkiboy GBAtemp Testing Area

    Member
    4,888
    37
    May 14, 2006
    United States
    Yes, I also think the reason the Wii has no chips inside is because those fat ass hamsters ate them all. If you add more chips for them your Wii will run faster and display in 1080p.

    I recommend Lays. But not the vinegar flavored ones.
     
  4. jimmy j

    jimmy j Awesome for hire.

    Member
    894
    0
    Apr 22, 2007
    the congo
    maybe these gnomes have something to do with the 360 hardware failures as well? [​IMG]
     
  5. Mewgia

    Mewgia drifter

    Member
    2,161
    10
    Dec 16, 2006
    United States
    Boston, MA
    I can confirm that this is true. I looked inside my Wii.
     
  6. Caoimhin

    Caoimhin GBAtemp Regular

    Member
    210
    1
    Aug 7, 2006
    Poland
    Kalwaria Zebrzydowska
    Are there Wiis with Bidoofs inside? [​IMG]
     
  7. Veho

    Veho The man who cried "Ni".

    Former Staff
    8,839
    16,718
    Apr 4, 2006
    Croatia
    Zagreb
    The Wii has no hardware. It is a series of (hamster) tubes.
     
  8. Kasoz

    Kasoz Advanced Member

    Newcomer
    97
    0
    May 16, 2007
    Netherlands
    -================================-

    (your age) < 12 years

    please verify your age if you want to add a reply

    -================================-
     
  9. noamkot

    noamkot Advanced Member

    Newcomer
    62
    0
    Nov 17, 2006
    Iceland
    I guess too much Vodka can do that to people... [​IMG] [​IMG]
     
  10. juggernaut911

    juggernaut911 GBAtemp Slut!

    Member
    4,153
    21
    Jul 13, 2006
    United States
    lol to post #1
     
  11. Seyiji

    Seyiji Rawr :3

    Member
    493
    10
    Nov 6, 2002
    United States
    PA
    No the 360 has little gremlins that eat the green rings and when finished feel guilty and replace them with red ones they also shit in the dvd drive [​IMG]
     
  12. Veho

    Veho The man who cried "Ni".

    Former Staff
    8,839
    16,718
    Apr 4, 2006
    Croatia
    Zagreb
    I always thought Mortadella was a sort of huge salami... [​IMG]
    No matter! Cheese me! It must be one helluva cheese if the Wiimote costs that much. Could it be the same cheese the Moon is made of? [​IMG]
     
  13. Destructobot

    Destructobot Crave the Hammer

    Member
    5,005
    5
    Oct 15, 2006
    United States
    Portland, OR
    I just realized something. If the Wii is powered by rodents and little people and cheese, aren't they technically hardware? If so, isn't this whole "Wii HAS no hardware" thread a lie?
     
  14. mthrnite

    mthrnite So it goes.

    Former Staff
    4,529
    944
    Jun 30, 2006
    United States
    th' south
    No, the 360 has little army men inside. As for the hardware failures, it's not the soldiers' fault, they're just following orders.
     
  15. Veho

    Veho The man who cried "Ni".

    Former Staff
    8,839
    16,718
    Apr 4, 2006
    Croatia
    Zagreb
    Well rodents and cheese aren't that hard, they are more sort of... squishy.

    Squishware! [​IMG]
     
  16. iTech

    iTech GBAtemp Regular

    Member
    243
    0
    Jun 14, 2007
    United States
    For once you're right. Mortadella is a big round piece of meat with white spots on it. Just like my ass.
    He probably meant Mozzarella.
     
  17. CockroachMan

    CockroachMan Scribbling around GBATemp's kitchen.

    Member
    3,889
    5
    Jan 14, 2006
    Brazil
    Brazil
    You people are obviously liars!
    Everyone knows that if you open up a Wii.. you die!
     
  18. jimmy j

    jimmy j Awesome for hire.

    Member
    894
    0
    Apr 22, 2007
    the congo
    [​IMG] I thought my discs smelled funny
     
  19. rashef

    rashef GBAtemp Regular

    Member
    256
    9
    Apr 7, 2006
    Poland
    Raimon
    You're wrong, they're obviously made on farms'n'stuff so they're Farm'n'stuffware .
     
  20. Veho

    Veho The man who cried "Ni".

    Former Staff
    8,839
    16,718
    Apr 4, 2006
    Croatia
    Zagreb
    So, Wii is produce?

    "I'll have a pound of your cucumbers, two pounds of potatoes, please, and two pounds of Wii"
    "Oh, you'll love it, ma'am, it's fresh from the farm."

    [​IMG]