Michael Jackson didn't die, he was murdered!
BY SWINE FLU!
Yes, it's true, the innocent rosey cheeked epidemic you all know and love is nothing but a soulless killing machine bent on world domination. "But that is preposterous! Why would Swine Flu kill Michael Jackson for World Domination?" You ask? Well, you snot nosed arrogant... Swine Flu knew that Michael Jackson was the only thing that stood in the way in his quest for world domination. (Proved by Michael Jackson's "Moonwalker")
Clearly, Swine Flu needed to stop the destined hero from rising up and stopping it's reign of terror, so it got in it's DeLorean, and did some serious shit at 80 mph, to fake a moon landing and have sex with your mom (Yes, Swine Flu is your father, and he said hi). Anywho, he grew up to be one of the most renowned scientists of the 90's...
Exactly, IT ALL MAKES SENSE!
When he wasn't being pissed off by his sister, he perpetrated an evil hoax from the intranetz called GLOABLE WORMING! While yelling at his mom to bring him more Hot Pockets.
Y'see, he made it all up, so it'll melt the plastic on Michael Jackson's face ever so slightly, causing a slight anomaly in the space-time continuum, which eventually caused his heart to go batshit crazy and stab his master in the hear... Brain... Bastard doesn't pay him enough for the work he does. Hence the term "Heart attack", Michael Jackson's heart is still on the loose, and presumed to have sided with 90's scientist, SWINE FLU! YOU SEE?! IT ALL ADDS UP!
Not only that, but Swine Flu also killed Michael Jackson, so he can sneeze on all the cd's that the emo
CRAAAAAAWLIIIIIING IIIIIIIIN MY SKIIIIIIIIN!
*ahem* Sorry, I have to do that every time someone says emo. Anyway, Swine Flu sneezes on all of Michael Jackson's CDs and INFECTS THE WORLD!
MUAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHHAAA!
Oh, and he kidnaps a few children here and there for no reason. Just like Moonwalker!
If anyone has knowledge to the whereabouts of wanted criminal Swine Flu or his companion Michael Jackson's heart, please contact the nearest Hot Pockets factory. *snip
BY SWINE FLU!
Yes, it's true, the innocent rosey cheeked epidemic you all know and love is nothing but a soulless killing machine bent on world domination. "But that is preposterous! Why would Swine Flu kill Michael Jackson for World Domination?" You ask? Well, you snot nosed arrogant... Swine Flu knew that Michael Jackson was the only thing that stood in the way in his quest for world domination. (Proved by Michael Jackson's "Moonwalker")
Clearly, Swine Flu needed to stop the destined hero from rising up and stopping it's reign of terror, so it got in it's DeLorean, and did some serious shit at 80 mph, to fake a moon landing and have sex with your mom (Yes, Swine Flu is your father, and he said hi). Anywho, he grew up to be one of the most renowned scientists of the 90's...
Exactly, IT ALL MAKES SENSE!
When he wasn't being pissed off by his sister, he perpetrated an evil hoax from the intranetz called GLOABLE WORMING! While yelling at his mom to bring him more Hot Pockets.
Y'see, he made it all up, so it'll melt the plastic on Michael Jackson's face ever so slightly, causing a slight anomaly in the space-time continuum, which eventually caused his heart to go batshit crazy and stab his master in the hear... Brain... Bastard doesn't pay him enough for the work he does. Hence the term "Heart attack", Michael Jackson's heart is still on the loose, and presumed to have sided with 90's scientist, SWINE FLU! YOU SEE?! IT ALL ADDS UP!
Not only that, but Swine Flu also killed Michael Jackson, so he can sneeze on all the cd's that the emo
CRAAAAAAWLIIIIIING IIIIIIIIN MY SKIIIIIIIIN!
*ahem* Sorry, I have to do that every time someone says emo. Anyway, Swine Flu sneezes on all of Michael Jackson's CDs and INFECTS THE WORLD!
MUAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHHAAA!
Oh, and he kidnaps a few children here and there for no reason. Just like Moonwalker!
If anyone has knowledge to the whereabouts of wanted criminal Swine Flu or his companion Michael Jackson's heart, please contact the nearest Hot Pockets factory. *snip
