The True Truth

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Sonic Adventure 2 happens but Sonic fails
Then Devil May Cry 2 and Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne happen
The
Goddamn
Mother fucking
not end
then Klonoa Beach Volleyball
sucks Jesus' cock
just the cd
it just sticks jesus in the middle
and then has a baby through the ass
it births the nintendo 64 game Glover
the Glover creators then make a deal with McDonalds, Disney, and Walmart to distribute the game to every household in America
Glover then takes over every single American's mind within 24 hours
all who refuse to submit to Glover are exterminated
the americans, now corrupted by Glover, go off to invade Hong Kong in search of the immortal Chin, the decedent of Bruce Lee. Chin was granted immortality after wiping out all 1.2 Billion of the "ugly fuckin reds"
until one free american emerges
after 173 years in cryostasis
the american hero Raiden emerges, only to find his americans gone
using his real hacker gamer skills, Raiden figures out that the unknown president of Taco Bell actually broke into the room where the original Glover cartridge was copied, and hacked the cartridge to incorporate mind control powers
he then cleaned his tracks and left
unfortunately, McDonalds was blamed for starting the massacre
thinking he would have information, Raiden then tracked down the CEO of McDonalds Russia
Fabio Enchillada, who citizens refer to as the Gay Rattlesnake out of fear
Raiden then learned that he had been kidnapped by the Canadian priest Riku
after traveling there
Raiden fought for his life to stop him and protect the Gay Rattlesnake
but the Gay Rattlesnake's men knocked out Raiden
thinking he was the kidnapper
the Gay Rattlesnake was killed in the meantime
when Raiden escaped from his men, he figured that he would have to travel to the alternate dimension the Nether, which was only rumored by normal people as "The Other Side"
Raiden then learned that the only way to travel the alternate dimension was with a Chaos Emerald
and performing the technique Chaos Control
but the only man on earth known to have one is 2008 US president Barack Obama
Raiden knew he would have to sneak aboard the American Aircraft
the Glover Aircraft
he ran on the water to the airport
he tracked down the Aircraft's location
he found that it would be traveling over Brazil
he traveled there
jumped up on the aircraft
but then learned that it was fake!
and it blew up
but not before Raiden found the fingerprints on the explosive that was placed on the ship
he then escaped right after
after scanning the fingerprints, he located them in the Alaskan Resort
he traveled there
killed approximately 17.12853798 million citizens to locate Obama
luckily, he had the emerald on hand
Raiden attempted to travel to the Nether, but couldn't
but then Obama
after Raiden killed him
revealed that he is actually immortal
he then sends him to the Nether
not knowing that he wanted to arrive there in the first place
Raiden then traveled the Nether and found Gay Rattlesnake
the Gay Rattlesnake then told Raiden that the Taco Bell president was actually the cousin of the grandfather of the robot duplicate of the "Legendary Thicc Man Dingodile"
he also told him that he had come up with the name "Hell" when he was taking a crap while playing Kingdom Hearts: Chain of Memories in the bathroom
when he was a youth
so
in honor of the great Gay Rattlesnake Fabio Enchillada, he established the land as "Hell"
feeling satisfied with life, Raiden decided to settle on Hell for 100 years
then King Mickey from Disney Castle finally found him
and Raiden then realized that he accidentally let the Glover americans take over the world
Oops
They then come back and go off to stop Riku
Located in the “Cum Laboratory” from Saudi Arabia
he then kicks his ass
And finally finds the glover cartridge
but Glover out fasted him
And jumped on his ass and fucked him to death
oops
Then King Mickey kicked his ass
but then Glover revealed that Klonoa Beach Volleyball was still alive
And king Mickey went super sayian hd 1.5 + gayassfuckshit Legendary Ass Fingering
Then he exclaimed
“We will make America great again!”
and watched J’s reviews on Sly 4 to gain the cum power to wipe it out for good
Raiden was then satisfied in the afterlife, as he was remembered as the founder of the great land of Hell
King Mickey then went on to have a life being a pimp
The
goddamn
Motherfucking
end
 
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