Post spam here

[Veho]

Every now and then I encounter a brilliant piece of spam that I really wish to share with the rest of the world.

And here it is.

MY NAME IS MS.MONALISA MADZIMA THE ONLY SURVIVING CHILD OF LATE
COMRADE ALFRED MADZIMA OF ZIMBABWE WHEN DISTRICT 'WAR VETERANS' GRABBED
MY FATHER, SURROUNDED WITH HAY BALES AND THEN SET THE HAY ALIGHT -THE
MAN WHO IS ALIVE DYING WITH PAINS

WHILE MY MOTHER AND ONLY BROTHER
WERE BEATEN TO DEATH WHEN 'WAR VETERANS' ARMED WITH STAVES AND AXES
WERE BUSED TO OUR FARM OUT SKATE OF HARARE.WHY BECAUSE MY LATE DAD
PUBLICLY OPPOSE ROBERT MUGABE LAND REFORM PROGRAM THAT ALL ZIMBABWE
WHITE FARMERS MUST GO DURING THE CURRENT WAR AGAINST FARMERS IN ZIMBABWE
RESULTING TO PRESIDENT ROBERT MUGABE CLAIM ALL WHITE OWNED FARMS IN OUR
COUNTRY, ALL THE WHITE FARMERS WERE ORDERED TO SURRENDER THEIR FARMS TO
HIS PARTY MEMBERS AND HIS FOLLOWERS WITHIN DAYS.

MY LATE FATHER WAS A MECHANIZE FARMER TREASURER OF THE FARMERS
CO-OPERATION THAT NEVER SUPPORTED HIS IDEA, SO THE PARTY MEMBERS INVADED
MY DAD'S FARMS AND BURNT EVERYTHING

EXACTLY A WEEK BEFORE HIS DEATH
MY LATE FATHER MOVED CONSIGNMENT OF USD$30.5 MILLION TO A PRIVATE
SECURITY COMPANY IN SOUTH AFRICA, THIS MONEY HE WANT TOPURCHASE
INDUSTRIAL & FARM MACHINERY FROM AMERICA FOR HECTARES OF FARMING LAND
ACQUIRED IN SUDAN. BUT AFTER THE BRUTAL ASSAULT ON MY FAMILY, I DECIDED
TO MOVE OUT OF ZIMBABWE BECAUSE MY LIFE WAS ACTUALLY IN DANGER WITH THE
DOCUMENTS RELATING TO THE MONEY MY FATHER LODGED IN A PRIVATE SECURITY
COMPANY. THE AMOUNT CONTAINED IN THE SAFE IS US$30.5M (THIRTY MILLION,
FIVE HUNDRED UNITED STATES DOLLARS ONLY) AND MOVE TO THE REPUBLIC OF
SOUTH AFRICA WHERE AM CURRENTLY BUSY WITH MY LAST YEAR IN UNIVERSITY.


I DECIDED TO MAKE CONTACT WITH YOU TO ACTUALLY ASSIST ME MOVE THIS
MONEY OUT OF SOUTH AFRICA,CONSIDER THIS PROPOSAL, I WILL GIVE YOU
USD$9,150,000.00 WHICH IS 30% OF THE TOTAL SUM FOR HELPING ME MOVE THIS
MONEY OUT TO YOUR COUNTRY AND 10% WILL BE MAPPED OUT FOR EXPENSES BOTH
OF US MAY INCUR DURING THIS TRANSACTION AND 60% WILL BE FOR INVESTMENT
IN YOUR COUNTRY UNDER YOUR STRICT SUPERVISION BECAUSE I WILL MIGRATE TO
YOUR COUNTRY AFTER MY GRADUATION AND FURTHER MY STUDIES, I DO REQUIRE A
LIFE TIME INVESTMENT THAT WILL STAND THE TASTE OF TIMES, THIS MY LAST
HOPE IN LIFE.

ALL I WANT IS FOR YOU TO FURNISH ME WITH ALL YOUR
DETAILS AND YOU'RE PERSONAL PHONE AND FAX NUMBERS FOR EASY
COMMUNICATION. YOU CAN CONTACT ME ON
*EMAIL*

THANKS AND GOD BLESS YOU.

BEST REGARDS


LISA MADZIMA (MS)

So, have you received any interesting spam recently?


REMEMBER TO REMOVE ANY LINKS, PHONE NUMBERS, MAIL ADDRESSES AND, ONCE AGAIN, LINKS FROM THE TEXT BEFORE POSTING.

 

[ElyosOfTheAbyss]

I received one on my school email address.

ATTENTION: Your school RemovedSchoolNameForPrivacy has received a virus on all of it's computers and must be removed. Download this file and launch it to remove it from your computer

Whats funny is it said YOUR computer not the schools computer.
I downloaded it onto a VM at home and it was an app that spreads Porn through your computer and deletes random files

 

[Deleted User]

I used to sometimes get texts saying I've won so many million in a competition I didn't even enter. I never tried to claim the prize, though sometimes I felt like trying just out of curiosity to see what the scammer would try asking me to do.

The other day I found a missed call on my phone and when I called it back an answering machine said I won some money. I didn't bother to listen any further. I hung up then and there.

 

[Lycan911]

 

[ElyosOfTheAbyss]

YUM

 

[CIAwesome526]

I was gonna do that. >: (

Spoiler: I have to tell you something

 

[Lycan911]

I was gonna do that. >: (

Spoiler: I have to tell you something

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2bad4u

 

[Rosselman]

I received this beautiful piece of spam today.

Spoiler: Spam

OFFICIAL LETTER FROM FEDERAL BUREAU OF INVESTIGATION FBI
EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR FBI FEDERAL BUREAU OF INVESTIGATION
FBI.WASHINGTON DC.
Mr. James B. Comey
FBI SEEKING TO WIRETAP INTERNET
ATTENTION: Beneficiary,
We the Federal Bureau of investigation (FBI) through our intelligence-monitoring network have discovered that the transaction that the bank contacted you previously for was legal. Recently the fund has been legally approved to be paid via Bank of America. So, we the Federal Bureau of investigation (FBI) Washington Dc, in conjunction with the United Nations (UN) financial department have investigated through our monitoring network noting you that your transaction with the Bank of America is legal.
You have the legitimate right to complete your transaction to claim your fund $10.7 (Ten million seven hundred thousand united state dollars) Because of so much scam going on Internet. We the Federal Bureau of investigation decided to contact the COURIER DELIVERY SERVICE in MINNEAPOLIS, for them to give us their procedures on how to send this money to you without any further complain or delay. We just got an information from the Bank of America and they have loaded your $10.7 (Ten million seven hundred thousand united state dollars) in ATM MASTER CARD and submit to the COURIER DELIVERY SERVICE for immediate delivery to your doorstep. You are required to choose one option, which you will be able to pay and also convenient for you, for quick delivery of your parcel containing you?re ATM CARD and other two original back up documents.
Service Type | Delivery Duration | Charges/Fees
------------------------------ ------------------------------ ---------------
Premium Express (24hrs Delivery)
Mailing $200.00 00.00
Insurance $150.00 00.00
Vat $100.00 00.00
TOTAL $450.00
$450(Four Hundred and fifty US Dollars Only).
.............................. .............................. ..........
Special Express (2 Days)
Mailing $180.00 00.00
Insurance $70.00 00.00
Vat $150.00 00.00
TOTAL $380.00 00.00
$380(Three Hundred and Eighty US Dollars Only).
.............................. .............................. ................
Economy Express (3Days)
Mailing $100.00 00.00
Insurance$150.00 00.00
Vat (5%) $50.00 00.00
TOTAL $300.00 00.00
$300(Three Hundred US Dollars Only).
.............................. .............................. ........
You are hereby required to advice us, on your parcel delivery option by filling in the required form stated above. Please note that the deadline for claiming your fund is exactly 48 hours after the receipt of this email. After this period, your fund will be return back so take note.
We request that you reconfirm your mailing address to ensure conformity with our record for immediate dispatch of your parcel to you. Only valid residential/Office address and postal address are certified Ok.
DELIVERY DESTINATION INFORMATION:
------------------------------ ------------------------------ -
Receiver's Name: .......
Address: ................
Tel/: ...................
Delivery Information/ Parcel Description
------------------------------ ------------------------------ -----------
Delivery Terms: International Delivery
Condition of Delivery: Priority Delivery
Consignment Note No: MI 49866-2110
Color of Parcel: ...Brown.
Total Weight: 2.1 kg
Total Net Weight: 1.7 kg
We are here to protect you from any problem till you receive your package; you can as well get in touch with the NORTHEHILLS COURIER DELIVERY SERVICE assigned to deliver this financial package to your doorstep. Below is the delivery company's contact information:
Companies Name: NORTHEHILLS COURIER DELIVERY SERVICE .
Directors Name: Mr. Agent Wood Gates
Email: [email protected]
TELEPHONE: (612) 276-6748
Looking forward to hear from you as soon as you receive this message.
Best Regards,
Mr. James B. Comey.
Federal Bureau of Investigation
J. Edgar Hoover Building
935 Pennsylvania Avenue,
NW Washington, D.C.
20535-0001, USA

 

[rufuszombot]

I checked my Spam folder just because of this thread, and found this:

Spoiler

How have you been? I hope you're having a super day.


I just wanted to let you know I've got some really
good news for you.


The Govt. is giving out money in your State for
college.


Theamount is $5,730*and it's given to you in a check
or you can haveit direct deposited.


You can use this money for online courses to further
your career and helpyou make more.

The best part of this is none of the funds have to be
paid back.


It only takes about a minute to check if you qualify.

Go Here Now and check if you qualify..



Thank you,
Sherry Marshall



Suggestions For Grilling Fish Open air


One of the vital standard objects that most individuals would at all times have on the grill regardless of the event is could be any kind of fish. It may very well be that giant bass you fortunately caught whereas on a fishing journey, a beautiful salmon steak or no matter fish it’s that will do nice on the grill. It is because grilling fish recipes would please most of our tastes and in addition to the one who’s cooking it since fish is enjoyable and simple to cook. It additionally matches vastly with different frequent objects on the grill equivalent to peppers and different veggies.

So to make grilling fish simpler in addition to higher tasting for you and everybody else who would eat it, listed below are some useful tricks to make it so.

Grilling Strategies

For complete fish equivalent to trout, snapper or salmon, one of the best ways to grill it’s by a hinged wire grill fish basket. It is usually one of the best ways to cook dinner fillets of tender fish equivalent to catfish or flounder. It is because the hinged wire distributes the warmth evenly on the fish and the slight stress that it’s going to have on the fish cook dinner significantly better, to not take into account these fairly grill marks it could make after. You could possibly additionally add herbs, lemon and different flavoring in between the fish and the grill for added flavor.

For agency fillets equivalent to tuna and salmon, these are nonetheless very good on the grill simply be certain to deal with them effectively to forestall them from breaking up and falling into the grill. Just be sure you flip them solely as soon as whereas grilling; turning it backwards and forwards from time to time will trigger it to interrupt apart. Additionally just be sure you watch the warmth and guantee that it is all the time turned on to medium, take not that fish cooks quicker than commonest gadgets on the grill.

Marinating Fish

In relation to marinating fish, you’ll be able to provide you with nearly anything you’ll be able to imagine as long as it might taste good on the fish, just take notice that liquid marinades are easier to absorb and would seep deeper into the fish as compared to sauces. When marinating fish, put the fish and the marinade together in a container and allow 30 minutes for the fish to soak up. Refrigerating while marinating can also be highly advised, only convey out the fish when it is ready to be cooked.

If the marinade used on the fish ought to be used as a sauce, have it boil by itself for no less than five minutes. Because the fish was raw when it was soaked in it, it might have traces of bacteria which we might not want on the sauce. Boiling it eliminates bacteria in it.

Plating Grilled Fish

Grilled fish is greatest served with other grilled seafood corresponding to scallops, shrimps, crabs or lobsters. It also would also do properly with grilled peppers, asparagus and onions. Grilled fish appears very appetizing when it has grill marks on the aspect, this of which is usually noted as the mark of an professional in relation to grilling.

This does not only look appetizing but can also be a good way of judging that the fish is cooked right. Serving it with a salad and a soup would have everyone eating it have a great memory with grilled fish.

 

[endoverend]

Spoiler

Zimmer Bruer

Jan 2
How are you doing? Hope that you are doing fine. My name is Zimmer Bruer, Am 58 years old in age. I am seeking for my soulmate and am I'm ready to build serious relationship that will lead to something wonderful. You can send letter to my email if you are interested in me. I will be looking forward to hear from you soon.

Thanks,
Zimmer.

Sadly I'm not into 58 year old men but I appreciate the offer

 

[Margen67]

This thread is pointless. I already spam everywhere else :^)

 

[ElyosOfTheAbyss]

GBAtemp.net -> The Independent Video Game Community: 3DS, Gateway 3DS, NDS and R4, Wii, PSP, PS4, Xbox One and all the gaming universe

ElyosOfTheAbyss, ValouIka replied to a thread you are watching at GBAtemp.net -> The Independent Video Game Community: 3DS, Gateway 3DS, NDS and R4, Wii, PSP, PS4, Xbox One and all the gaming universe.

[Release] Bird Whisperer - A Notification Creater
Don't work for me...

Apparently this is spam and every other GBATemp email isn't

 

[Veho]

i'm looking for a friend with benefits how about you? i'm 25/f with a big b00ty hehe!

do u like girls with a lil extra thickness? u should msg me

view my profile *URL REMOVED*


let's talk soon

What are u looking for? I just want a casual h00kup. Are u down?

are you ready to please me? i will make you my s3xslave!

you can see my profile here *URL REMOVED*


TALK S00N !

 

[Veho]

Make your soldier ready for long and exhausting (for joyful) night battles

 

[ElyosOfTheAbyss]

Hey, do you like movies? Do you like TV games? Then we have the thing fore you, Introducing REMOVEDLINK, a website for getting anything for free. We have movies, board games, books and Music CD's All you have to do is sign up and enter your name birthday and credit card info and you can then chose what you want FOR FREE!!!!

 

[Deleted User]

Spoiler

MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee MingLee Kappa

 

[Veho]

From Captain James Moten
Attn,

May this mail find you well.

I am Captain James Moten of the US Marine. I am currently in Iraq as an Advisory to the Iraq Military on fight against ISIL Terrorits.

During the fight to retake the Mosul Dam, we discovered the sum of USD$ 5.200.000.00 stocked in a box which I have moved to a secret location. I will like to move this money as quickly as possible to you for business purpose. Only if I can trust you.

any way I am willing to settle you with 30% of the total sum.You will advice me on the business to invest in since I am not business oriented. I want to move this money to your destination for you to safe keep it for me until am out of Iraq,

Please get back to me so that we can discuss on the way forward.

Reply me with this email


Captain James Moten

 

[Veho]

[sic]

My vagina is so wet, will you cure my body with your c0ck? Don't be an @ss

 

[Touko White]

If you want an example of some of the bollocks that goes through my Gmail (thank God I normally use GMX.co.uk for everything), here's a thing:

Hello my friend,

I am Nancy, a Banker and Credit System Programmer (Krayinvestbank Russia). I saw your contact email while browsing through the bank DTC Screen and I trust to have this deal with you.
As a first level system programmer of the Bank (Krayinvestbank Russia) I'm capable of initiating program transmission transfers to any trusted account.Now why I'm contacting you is that;
There are unclaimed pensions & Tax refunds abandoned for many years without trace and activity of the holder in which I have dislodged $42.5m from the unclaimed funds and have programmed from the 
Inter-switch Data Base for transmission to a different account as Dividend Warrant Transmission Payment in which I need you to forward an account where you will receive the Dividend 
Warrant Payment valued $42.5m which will be transmitted to your account in bits.Please all I need from you is sincerity and trust that you will not cheat or disappoint me.Send me your 
account inform/co-ordinates for the transmission of this Dividend Warrant Payment.You have nothing to worry about because I also do not want to lose my work as banker in this 15 years of service.
My trusting you I believe will draw us closer for a better relationship in the future ahead.A lot of business opportunities come out from the DTC SCREEN which we can execute together.

Hope to hear from you with a firm promise that you will not let me down while looking forward to receiving your account.
Thank you!

-Nancy Rodriguez
.Email: ************

I might be able to find others too! Just make sure you have a Gmail to start receiving spam!
"CANNON DRILL!"

 

[Seriel]

So much of it, where to start?

Spoiler