Possibly considering writing a HP parody

[iTech]

Inspired by the success of the "Barry Trotter" series of Harry Potter parodies, I decided I might be thinking of contemplating writing my own.
Originally, I had envisioned a character named "Hairy Pothead", a mute stoner that was shipped off to an historic penitentiary facility and had all sorts of crazy adventures with the inmates (I got the idea after watching The Last Castle)
But the names "Harry/Hairy Pothead" already exist in some lame-ass parodies from other, less talented and presumably child-murdering homosensual people.

Therefore, I decided that if I were to write a a parody, it would be parody on the "concept and implementation" of Harry Potter instead of just the various incarnations of the franchise, and thus more of a satire than a parody. A name "Harry Butter" would be perfect to craft a satirical story dealing with the way the series was milked to death. However, "Hairy Butter" has the added benefit of communicating the vulgarity of some parts of the story to potential readers. But, there is some artist named "Hairy Butter" (no shit!) and thus I'm using it only unless that person complains, otherwise I'm switching to "Harry", IF I'm going through with it at all.

Here's the first paragraph which I wrote about ten minutes ago;

Hairy Butter and The Magical Milkcow


The gleaming sun shining through the rolled-up condom on the floor next to Hairy Butter's bed
was the first sparkle of light of a new day which he saw upon coming to senses.
A reminder of what he had done the night previously, the piece of rubber with an elongated tip and
coated profusely with vaginal grease smiled mockingly in his direction. He smelled the sweat mix of penile protein
and cheap Turkish carpet and several memories of his childhood came rushing through his still-dreamy mind.
With a swift jerk of his legs, Hairy was back on his feet. He refused to let the somnolence take
over and force him to miss the train to Hogwash and convinced himself that he was as fit as ever and the
unrelinquishing straining that occurred last night did not happen. He could not afford to arrive late at
Hogwash's School For Marketing-induced Misery this year, not when recalling what had happened during this past summer.
Hairy glanced at the Plutonium-powered Hairlessness Clock he inherited from his favorite
uncle Seriously Whack, and recalled his last words of advice before being decapitated publically
by a policeman for possession of Narcotics during a southern-whore scavangerhunt in Texas
"Don't be no goddamn shizzle ya dig? Be gettin' up earlier ya hear? Sleep is the cousin of death! Wordup!"
and decided that it was best to start packing immediately after breakfast even though the train would
not depart before noon.

Obviously it's just a draft and therefore poorly constructed, but it gives you an idea of the tone of the book.
So, according to you, should I or should I don't (do it)?

 

[Bitbyte]

"He smelled the sweat mix of penile protein
and cheap Turkish carpet and several memories of his childhood came rushing through his still-dreamy mind."

Made me lol

"Don't be no goddamn shizzle ya dig? Be gettin' up earlier ya hear? Sleep is the cousin of death! Wordup!" as well. Make more!

 

[RayorDragonFall]

If you did it, I would read it. Thats all I'm going to say... for now.

 

[Wanque]

You've got some ability there, so I'd say forget the parody. Harry Potter is already old news.

Just change things a bit and turn it into something original.

 

[iTech]

You've got some ability there, so I'd say forget the parody. Harry Potter is already old news.

Just change things a bit and turn it into something original.

Thank you!

I am doing original stuff already, so this would be complementary. Though I agree it is very late to be writing a parody.

I did another two paragraphs just now. I think I just invented live book writing.

QUOTEAfter throwing a last condemning glance at the messy sex toy-littered room, and swiftly dodging a pair of trousers
that came loose from the the ceiling which he had used the previous night to protect his arm from getting covered in
fecal matter while he rhythmically fisted a quivering anus, he slided his fingers around the doorknob and prepared
to go downstairs and join the family. "How will I be able to look them in the eyes", Hairy asked himself
repeatedly in an attempt to stall the inevitable confrontation with his Aunt Putania and Uncle Roberta.
"How will I ..." He came back on that thought and decided that the quickest pain was the best,
and pulled the door open with all his strength. The gush of air the door had pushed in his face carried with it
an ominous scent. "Oh no", Hairy fearfully whispered, "She made me pancakes!".
Hairy knew that his fears of odd behavior coming from his family members, particularly from his recently retired prostitute
Aunt Putania, were founded. She was bound to greet him in the morning in the same way she had done since he was a child;
by winking at him and pretending to suck a cock and then running her tongue over the gums of her toothless mouth while growling "Hmm".
Hairy never thought that little running-gag of hers would ever seem inappropriate, until now.
"But she can't cook! It's just not possible!".
Hairy stopped several times while walking down the staircase his transsexual Uncle Roberta made from discarded sardine cans and glue,
each time checking for clues as to what awaited him, so he could still make his way back up if necessary when something
he could not possibly deal with was occurring downstairs. Each step the smell of pancakes became stronger. Finally, Hairy
ran out of stairs to stall on, and was forced to confront the veracity of his suspicions. He reminded himself that if he
stood there by the foot of the staircase for too long, which had just collapsed silently into itself, he would appear to
be acting unusual to his family members which would reveal that he himself was feeling uncomfortable with
the events he by now wished had never occurred.

Upon entering the kitchen, he was struck with complete astonishment. Hairy frowned and tucked his chin into his neck
while squinting his eyes in disbelief. Besides a random homeless person sleeping naked on the floor in a pool
of blue vomit, there was nothing unusual! There were no plates set up orderly on the floor with big steaming pancakes
made from cement and Jaw Breakers as he expected, no pots still half-lit on fire smoldering in the cast-iron bucket his
family uses as a kitchen sink. No toothpicks laid out neatly on a piece of recycled toilet paper which they would
use as crude forks, or "prickly frogs" as his Uncle Roberta would refer to them.
Hairy decided to take another whiff of air in search of the aroma. He didn't smell it anymore.
He took yet another whiff of air. Nothing, besides the damp smell of toxic Aspergillus Fungus which had been devouring the house for as long as he could remember. He decided to close his eyes, exhale deeply while bending over, and forcefully fill his
lungs with air when he was stopped by the putrid smell of the homeless guy's unwashed penis head now being close
to his nostrils - which nearly threw him off his feet. "Ah dude!", he exclaimed in a muffled high-pitched tone while closing his nose with his fingers and kicking the hobo against his hips. He shook it off and took a few quick breaths to clear his airways from the aroma of what his uncle Seriously once referred to as "home-made hobo-cheese", how ever inappropriate that name might be.
"It must have been my imagination", Hairy assured himself. A familiar female voice could suddenly be heard outside.
He opened his eyes widely in astonishment "Off course!", he immediately knew the cause of the smell.

[EDIT]: Live book editing FTW!
[EDIT:] No more editing, that's it!

 

[iTech]

Ah crap. I just found out the name of the school in "Barry Trotter" is Hogwash as well. I'm taking Wanque's advice and forgetting about it. Ah well, still got plenty of other shit to work on.


[EDIT:] For those eager to know what was going to happen next; He noticed that the smell came from his neighbor's house and was carried by a draft through a huge hole in the kitchen wall. Aunt Putania caught him mumbling something about pancackes, and he didn't know what better thing to say than to claim he was gonna make pancakes for the entire family, which he did. His aunt was too ashamed of the incestual porking session to look him in the face, so she never noticed the dripping condom stuck on Hairy's forehead, which later ended up in her pancake which toughened avoiding the topic of last night. His uncle Roberta shuffled away when he saw Hairy approaching and turned on the TV, pretending to be very interested in some show, which ironcally was about Incest. He claimed he was watching his favorite show without even having noticed the topic, when he did notice, he said he was actually looking for a show on "Action Geographic", which was also a show about incest "ah yes, Insects, you know how I love themz!", when it became apparant that it was not about insects, he switched to a show which was about inbred southerners, then a show about the closely related bloodlines in modern political dynasties, and then a news channel showing Bush giving a speech. And so on ... His school would have been a corporate-shark-crafting facility with specific campuses with fitting names for groups of people with varied interests and abilities - you had the Software-Inn, the Graphics-Dorm, etc. and people would be labeled as to what group they belonged to. The "Ron" character would become a mass murderer after taking "Paxkill" and listening to Immortal Technique and would storm the school with an army of revived previously-dead fetuses and fist fuck "Hermione"'s pussy while holding a hand grenade. The headmaster was a slick character reminiscent of Christian Bale's character in American Psycho (he applauded "Ron"'s actions and offered him a highly-paid babysitting job) ...

 

[Smuff]

I for one am disappointed at the abandoning of this work-in-progress of literary genius

 

[JacobReaper]

You've got some ability there, so I'd say forget the parody. Harry Potter is already old news.

Just change things a bit and turn it into something original.

lol,