MORAL DILEMA, NEED MATURE FEEDBACK

Gizametalman

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Ok guys, really hopping that you could give me WISE advice in this matter.
I'm gonna be honest, and cleas as possible.

So, I'm an artist. That means that I make Paintings for a living, I have been invited to some galleries, museums and art bazaars, etc. blah blah blah.

But I have a serious moral problem regarding my art and some people.
So, what I paint is Erotic art, Hyper realistic portraits and Portraits (the last two differes in technique)

In the business of art, one just can't simply take any picture, paint it and sell it to someone, because these little things called copyrights and intellectual property.
Unless I manage to paint some beautiful girl that's not very well known (so nobody can claim the copy-rights because the chick of my painting is pretty much not recognizable by anybody, than means MANY adult aimed models) then I'll be ok.
But not all the time I'm gonna use the same method for my work.

And there's a girl that I used to love and that I want to paint. We used to go to high-school togheter, and I had feelings for her, and could tell that she had the same feelings 'bout me.
But never had the guts.
So, recently, I discovered her facebook page.
Talked to her, and told her that I'm an artist, looking for models, and that I'll be paying her to pose for me.
She told me: "As long as it helps you, I'll do it for free" (basically)
The problem is that, she is married now, she has a child of her own (she's like 22 or 21 years old, I'm 23)
And the dilemma here is:

-She's waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay to beautiful to let her go and miss the oportunity to worship her as my muse.
but
-She has a family now, and I don't want to trouble her relationship, nor her family with my artistic desires.

Do you suggest me to stick with her?
PS: She's out of my reach now. Plus I don't see her like a potential loving partner, so I'm not in love with her anymore.
I only admire her beauty.
 

MichiS97

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Well I don't really see any moral issues with painting her but the real question is if it's gonna do you any good if you get that close to her, I think I'd be really depressed afterwards if I was in your situation since your feelings will probably become stronger again but she'd still be out of reach. In addition, your husband might have pretty big issues with that idea if he doesn't care about and/or doesn't understand art.
 

Gizametalman

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Yes yes yes yes! I understand that. I presume that she already told him.
Although... again... not in love with her.
So I'm gonna be ok.

About her, I'm worried, because I don't know her husband (if you can call a 20 year old guy a husband...)
Again, I woulnd't do anything to harm her life.
So... gotta re-think every single possible worst case scenario here.

--------------------- MERGED ---------------------------

You would have to ask her if you make one use her as a model and make a painting of such a style would hurt her morale, how can I say..
If somehow it would offend her, or degrade her image

Hmmm... yes, I've thought about that scenario.
As she said to me: "As long as It helps you, I'll do it"

BUT OF COURSE IM NOT GONNA ASK HER TO NUDE FOR ME.
Just a portrait. Just that.
I already explained to her that matter.
 

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You could just not. If you are having this much of a moral dilemma, that you are bring it up in a gaming forum. You most likely aren't really over her.
Not to mention if you don't know her husband (and with that tone, sounds like you are bit salty,) then you are just asking for more problems.
 

MichiS97

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Oh you don't wanna do a nude painting! Well then it shouldn't be a problem at all, if her husband isn't a huge dick.
 

Gizametalman

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You could just not. If you are having this much of a moral dilemma, that you are bring it up in a gaming forum. You most likely aren't really over her.
Not to mention if you don't know her husband (and with that tone, sounds like you are bit salty,) then you are just asking for more problems.
Sadly that's true.
I'm so desperate with this that I have already asked for advices in a gamming forum.
Haha, not being sarcastic.

Honestly, can't think of anything else.
 

MichiS97

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You could just not. If you are having this much of a moral dilemma, that you are bring it up in a gaming forum. You most likely aren't really over her.
Not to mention if you don't know her husband (and with that tone, sounds like you are bit salty,) then you are just asking for more problems.
I agree about him not being over her. Like I said, it's not as much of moral issue as it is a personal one.
 

Gizametalman

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Oh you don't wanna do a nude painting! Well then it shouldn't be a problem at all, if her husband isn't a huge dick.
My exact words to her were:
I'm not gonna ask you to make anything inmoral, nor ask you to be at my place.
I'm only asking for a single picture that I NEED TO TAKE
(this because I can control the angle, the lights, the background, the colours, the resolution of the picture=
And she said:
"Yeah, as long as it helps you. I'll do it"

But we still have to discuss that she's letting me use her face as some sort of brand, if you really think about it, she'll become a product... regardless how selfish that may sound :blush:

--------------------- MERGED ---------------------------

I agree about him not being over her. Like I said, it's not as much of moral issue as it is a personal one.
Not koking... but how come I didn't noticed that before?

More honesty...I have to prepare some paintings for an upcomming exhibition... I'm a bit stressed, because I have yet to complete some paintings, and I have to attend college..,
So I was thinking about her, as a last resource to prevent any problem with copyrights.
 

MichiS97

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Man, I don't know what you want to do with that painting but as long as you don't sell it to advertisement companies and earn millions with her face you shouldn't really worry about anyone becoming a product. It's literally just a face on a canvas.
 
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Gizametalman

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Man, I don't know what you want to do with that painting but as long as you don't sell it to advertisement companies and earn millions with her face you shouldn't really worry about anyone becoming a product. It's literally just a face on a canvas.
That's the problem!
It's for selling them. :shy::creep:

Am I being... a dick?
Please be honest.

--------------------- MERGED ---------------------------

Think I gotta be honest with her and tell her that...

--------------------- MERGED ---------------------------

Hey... now... how can I delete this wall of shame? :tpi:
 

H1B1Esquire

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If you do good work, it's tasteful, and professionally done in a respectful way, I'm sure it'll work out, but your relationship with her will change. You've started on a path; if you don't paint her, she might think you chose someone 'better looking.' If you do paint her, you might end up in an awkward situation and spoil not only the relationship, but you might not finish the painting at all.

If you do choose to paint her, have her husband there so their relationship stays the way it is, without doubts of infidelity. If you don't paint her, definitely let her know that you value the relationship you have with her and the relationship between her and her spouse.

My personal recommendation, paint her. Will she be Mona lisa? Frida? If you never do it, you'll never know. Plus, more subjects to work with creates more exposure, which is good in a business that usually flourishes post-humously.
 

Gizametalman

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If you do good work, it's tasteful, and professionally done in a respectful way, I'm sure it'll work out, but your relationship with her will change. You've started on a path; if you don't paint her, she might think you chose someone 'better looking.' If you do paint her, you might end up in an awkward situation and spoil not only the relationship, but you might not finish the painting at all.

If you do choose to paint her, have her husband there so their relationship stays the way it is, without doubts of infidelity. If you don't paint her, definitely let her know that you value the relationship you have with her and the relationship between her and her spouse.

My personal recommendation, paint her. Will she be Mona lisa? Frida? If you never do it, you'll never know. Plus, more subjects to work with creates more exposure, which is good in a business that usually flourishes post-humously.

Actually was planning to ask her to sign a contract-sort-of-thing with me.
Something like:
"Hey there, thanks for being a huge success in the exhibition, Would you like to let me make some more paintings?
I'll pay you 40% of the proffit of each one"
Not kidding... actually considering that.
 
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Well, if she's agrees to pose for you, I don't think there's a problem with that.
What you gotta be sure if: She's really doing it for free, 'cause you won't want her to then sue you or something 'cause you haven't paid her to use her likeness for profit,
and if her family agrees too for this. You don't want her husband going after you 'cause you painted her in some "suggestive" poses...
Still, I think you might check some legal stuff and whatnot before you actually do anything, just to be sure.

Meh, you know what? Don't take my advice too seriously, 'cause I don't really have an idea how all of this works.
 

Gizametalman

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Well, if she's agrees to pose for you, I don't think there's a problem with that.
What you gotta be sure if: She's really doing it for free, 'cause you won't want her to then sue you or something 'cause you haven't paid her to use her likeness for profit,
and if her family agrees too for this. You don't want her husband going after you 'cause you painted her in some "suggestive" poses...
Still, I think you might check some legal stuff and whatnot before you actually do anything, just to be sure.

Meh, you know what? Don't take my advice too seriously, 'cause I don't really have an idea how all of this works.
After many years of studying art, I pretty much know the do's an do not's of the business.
That's why I was considering that we should have some sort of contract on that matter.
 
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