Legal Advice and Question


Well-Known Member
Feb 17, 2015
United States
In the US (also in California), is it Legal to basically Blacklist someone from obtaining Legal Assistance? My Friend left her Abusive as hell Husband and Father of her 2 Kids. Then when she found out he had Legal Representation, she went looking for an Attorney for herself. But for some reason, all the Legal Teams she called all said the same thing. That him or his Legal Team contacted them for Advice, so they could not help her. All that is doing is making it so the Victim can not get help, so the Abuser once again gets away with shit, that the Victim is powerless to stop.
She was able to find an Attorney, but she does not do her damn Job right. Hearing Dates, Hearings, and Communication is crap. There was a Mediation Hearing that she did not even have the info for.

Now, how do you deal with the Abuser, who is a Correctional Officer, who messed with her head so bad, was so abusive (Physical, Mental, Verbal, Emotional), that he got you to turn to Drugs, and become Suicidal????? She has been clean for Years now, after a fall from her Home. I am thankful he did not drive her to successfully kill herself. But it seems like the Judge is accepting all his bullshit. She has done so many Drug Tests, even a Hair Test which he had no Authorization for, but Ordered it anyway, then after, said he did not Order it. And no matter what Evidence or Sworn Statements she Produces that Proves what she has been through is true, it either does not get put into Evidence, or gets Disregarded.

How do you deal with this kind of corrupt shit???? It is like everything is being done so my Friend will Lose her Children, and lose the Case.

EDIT - Also, is it Legal to Force a Mother out of her Home, who had 80% Custody of her 2 Children, within 30 Days, but due to the Covid Pandemic, could not afford to, so the Judge chose to take her Children away, give them to the Abuser, then told the Mother to leave the Home within 24 Hours, all because she was not sure about the CA Covid Eviction Protections that were in place.
Not to mention, they were Separated for about 10 Months, but he never paid any kind of Child Support, or helped to make sure the Bills were Paid, when they were also in his Name.
Last edited by Smoker1, , Reason: More Information


Editorial Team
Nov 21, 2005
United Kingdom
While not presently sitting in the US then I will still do the I am not a lawyer bit, much less one in California which is its own kettle of fish. While there are many sides to many stories (to say nothing of perspective of the judge which is also something to consider) then assuming it is as you wrote.

Contacting all the legal representation in a geographic area such that they are unable to represent someone (lawyers being required to advocate for the best interests of their client can not serve two masters over the same issue being the thought process) and thus that someone has less chance of representation is a breach of ethics (especially for a lawyer, and I would not be surprised for a corrections officer as well, regular police would often be expected to know better, but don't know what goes there) and something a good judge will look very unfavourably upon. If you (though try to find a lawyer that can speak to the others as there are questions you might not be able to ask here or know whether a simple statement is OK or whether a proper affidavit is needed) can demonstrate this then that would be something to do.

I assume this is family court which makes life harder, and if your legal representation is not on form then even more fun ensues.

I have not read the eviction moratoriums for CA (or further afield if it is federally directed) and don't know what is in place still though nowhere I else I have seen (and I sort of follow real estate) has lifted them just yet. I am also unsure what this home is -- if it is a marital home then most places the spouse will inherently have some interest in it and that makes eviction a harder thing still, though I am not sure it is from what is written there (if someone has 80% custody is that a legal agreement from a prior divorce or just practical realities?). If it is a separate thing then what the judge is doing ruling on what is an agreement with other parties I don't know, unless it was some strongly worded advice that being delinquent on rent is not a great look.

"And no matter what Evidence or Sworn Statements she Produces that Proves what she has been through is true"
Quality of evidence is a fun one here. Sworn statements are something to have but if it is ultimately "he said, she said" then gets tricky, should those statements be from police called to domestics, visits to doctors and other things along that sort of line (hard evidence as well) then that is another.

If it is as you say then sounds like it is going to be a bad situation and it is already way down the track which makes it harder still to do much about, even more so if kids are mixed up in it* and "the best interests of the child" are involved (by the way do they have an advocate of some form?). Get complete copies of transcripts and files from the lawyer to keep personally/in a safe place as you might have to appeal** something down the line, and most family court things also have scope to revisit at a later date (though often in front of the same judge which is not ideal if this one is not so hot). If she wants to keep a journal then while not as useful as a transcript for many purposes could help, especially if looking to maybe demonstrate incompetence on the part of her lawyer for something). Ditto get any lack of support, especially if said support was put into some form of legal agreement, also noted for future use. If the hair test was ordered then the lab that did it might well have a record of that, and also why you want transcripts.

*you and I have a business deal go bad and we can battle it out over years, get the press involved, drag each other through the mud... and almost treat it as a sport. Harder here for obvious reasons.

**no easy feat, when you say evidence then do make sure it is submitted as trying to introduce things on appeal is hard (trying to introduce it later in the case is also not going to be easy), and very rarely do such things result in a new hearing/trial.

Short version. Sounds like a rock and a hard place scenario. Get transcripts, note all relevant events down you can, don't lie and prepare to probably lose in the short term, and then come back later. If she had a bit of money and a good lawyer then there might be more, though if this would involve going after a sitting family court judge... yeah.
I would also say for your part losing your kids tends to be a pretty rough thing so if she found solace in chemicals before then be wary of it happening again when it drops -- a relapse will not look good when back in court in 6 months to revisit things.
There are charities dealing with abused partners that also have lawyers and legal advice available. Might be worth seeing what goes with one or more of them. Sooner if you can (whether you will get a change of counsel or just another party in your legal team) as there might be something they can do while it is active that is harder after it is concluded, and help them to help you by having transcripts, files and whatever else available to show them if you can.
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Endless Trash
Global Moderator
Sep 13, 2009
Gaming Grotto
Never ask for legal advice on an Internet forum, 99% of people online are not qualified to give you relevant and accurate advice, the remaining 1% are lawyers, out of whom maybe 0.01% would be willing to give you some for free, 0.1% of whom are licensed to practice in your specific state - your odds of making a big mistake are high. Contact citizens advice or a solicitor.
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