I know the blogs aren't meant to moderated but I don't like this thread one bit test84. I advise you to change your opening post as this could be taken the wrong way by a lot of members.
If it is yourself who is feeling suicidal please talk with me on IRC or via PM.
My older brother hanged himself on Christmas day morning in 1999 and to this day no one really knows why. He left behind a daughter and the whole family was distraught for some time and still are to this day. Christmas has never been the same since.
imo suicide is a very selfish thing to do. Have you even thought about how it will effect everyone around you? If things are bad and your feeling down it will pass, the next day can always change things and feelings.
Please for me, and everyone else, explain yourself, as like I said, I don't like this thread one bit.