Discussion in 'The Edge of the Forum' started by Westside, Apr 2, 2007.

  1. Westside

    Westside Sogdiana

    Dec 18, 2004
    Guantanamo bay
    Perhaps you'll pardon me if I write this letter in a more personal vein than usual. I want to tell you about some personal perceptions of mine, primarily because the only way that we can fight GBAtemp, the only way we can beat it, is to pave the way for people of every sex, race, and socioeconomic status to fulfill their own spiritual destiny. To organize my discussion, I suggest that we take one step back in the causal chain and oppose evil wherever it rears its muddleheaded head. This is neither a document written in anger nor something I am being paid to write, and every intellectually honest person knows it. What I mean to say is that if we can understand what has caused the current plague of wishy-washy slaves to fashion, I believe that we can then protect little children from tactless chiselers like GBAtemp. GBAtemp shows a curious unwillingness to examine the warp and woof of its warnings. It is also worthy of note that I have traveled the length and breadth of this country and talked with the best people. I can therefore assure you that it is like a magician who produces a dove in one hand, while the other hand is busy trying to take advantage of human fallibility to legitimate irresponsibility, laziness, and infidelity.

    Many people are shocked when I tell them that GBAtemp's magic-bullet explanations mean delays in getting things processed, errors in handling requests, inefficiency, and many more years of error from keeping an old system alive. And I'm shocked that so many people are shocked. You see, I had thought everybody already knew that GBAtemp ignores the most basic ground rule of debate. In case you're not familiar with it, that rule is: attack the idea, not the person. GBAtemp's hangers-on are in league with libidinous boors who pit people against each other. That's the current situation, and if you have any doubt about the reality of it, then you haven't been paying close enough attention to what's been happening in the world. I am not going to go into too great a detail about oppressive crybabies, but be assured that this cannot go on much longer. Once we realize that, what do we do? The appropriate thing, in my judgment, is to address the real issues faced by mankind. I say that because its methods are much subtler now than ever before. It is more adept at hidden mind control and its techniques of social brainwash are much more appealingly streamlined and homogenized. Let's all keep our fingers crossed that GBAtemp doesn't make a mockery of our most fundamentally held beliefs.

    GBAtemp's faithfuls don't represent an ideology. They don't represent a legitimate political group of people. They're just flat amateurish. It doesn't take a genius to figure out that as long as the beer keeps flowing and the paychecks keep coming, GBAtemp's cheerleaders don't really care that I appreciate feedback and other people's views on subjects. I don't, however, appreciate feedback when it's given in an unprofessional manner. In order to guide the world into an age of peace, justice, and solidarity, we must plant markers that define the limits of what is sex-crazed and what is not. And that's just the first step. Remember, GBAtemp craves more power. I say we should give it more power -- preferably, 10,000 volts of it. In short, I feel we must defend with dedication and ferocity the very rights that GBAtemp so desperately wants to abolish. I hope other members of the community feel the same.
  2. Westside

    Westside Sogdiana

    Dec 18, 2004
    Guantanamo bay
    Just kidding, it's been a year since we started dating [​IMG]

    My dearest GBAtemp,

    Upon this canvas I shall spill my soul's inner-most desires for you, and upon my chest I carve your name with the dagger of carnal desire, so the world may knoweth that only you lie within my heart.

    Should a thousand angels tear out my heart with the forsaken instrument of death, it would still beat for you a million times and call your name in the night. I just cannot explain the passion inside which burns for you.

    What manner of creature can resist your romantic hazel coloured eyes have always mystified me. I'm not even sure what colour hazel is officially supposed to be, but I did a check using a paint program and the html code is #887044. I always thought hazel was a type of nut, or even a type of witch, but now I realise its actually a colour.

    Your lovely red hair has always amazed me. It reminds me of strands of shiny copper wool (believe it or not, copper wool actually does exist! Honest I did a search on Google and found a picture) Although I wouldn't use your hair to clean out a frying pan with, so please don't worry about that and stop hiding the scissors.

    I really do love our bonding sessions on the couch. I think its so wonderful when me and you sit there and just talk about anything, and even watch a DVD together. Although I must admit I really do find it funny when you tell me one of your boring dirty jokes and I pretend its funny and giggle.

    Words alone cannot express how unique my love is for you. I love you, and you only, I swear that to you my love ....well OK, I guess I also love my car which I've just bought recently. I promise to take you out in it, and because I am so happy about the car, I promise I won't try and make you put out as always. Well at least you won't slap me for touching you in an anti-social manner in front of old ladies, but we're not talking about that right now! (Besides the fact that I just mentioned it now, but that part was allowed because the context was a little bit relevant)

    You know I've always loved your gorgeous bum and I can't wait to see you again so I can drool like an idiot over your bum and make a complete fool out of myself in public as always. I think its great how you just roll your eyes upwards whenever I do that, and politely smile at me. Oh how I do love those charming little habits of yours!

    My love, you know what would look hot and vibrant on that beautiful body of yours? Black underwear! Oh God, if I saw you wearing those I would simply explode into a heap of sparks with joy! (By the way that was a figure of speech, cos I wouldn't ACTUALLY spontaneously combust, otherwise I wouldn't be able to appreciate your lovely body in Black underwear).

    I wish you the most passion-filled and happiest Anniversary ever, and my heart will be beating only for you my love!

    Forever and eternally yours and yours only,


  3. [M]artin

    [M]artin .

    Nov 7, 2006
    United States
    Ok, let's break this down:

    GBAtemp endorses child labor or bad fashion or something...

    Source plz.

    Magical bullets of magic.


    Attack Idea's weak point for MASSIVE DAMAGE!

    What the fuuuuuudggggeee? I checked my dictionary and it told me to go screw myself because no one uses words as ridiculous as those anymore.

    Homogenized? Like the milk? Didn't know that crossing your fingers makes problems disappear, thanks for the tip!

    I think they just represent the latest in flashcart reviews, rom releases, and homebrew news, but iono.

    Booze + Cheeleaders = WIN!


    Looks like some copy & paste action from Communist Monthly. [​IMG]
  4. Kyoji

    Kyoji ウッーウッーウマ

    Apr 15, 2003
    United States
    Frick Westside, you must be bored!
  5. Shinji

    Shinji ҉҉ ҉҉

    Nov 6, 2002
    United States
    City of Delusion
    This smells like one of those auto-gen essay things that everyone was having fun with like...2 years ago on the forum?

    And come on Westside, you know you can never leave. >=) I knew this was BS the moment I saw it was started by you [​IMG]
  6. Linkiboy

    Linkiboy GBAtemp Testing Area

    May 14, 2006
    United States
    Yeah, this is from a complaint letter generator.